Tell me a joke and I'll reward you with 10 points if I laugh...

The Giant · 07-21-13, 12:07 AM

Anytime you can work a colostomy bag into a joke, you deserve points.

Everyone knows that, Seaweed.

The Giant · 07-21-13, 12:08 AM

That's it for now.

Save your jokes, this thread is officially closed for now.

I might re-open it when I have more points to burn.

Thanks for playing.

Seaweed · 07-21-13, 12:34 AM

greenhippo · 07-21-13, 12:41 AM

The Giant. One more good sir.

My animals have been getting sick lately so I took a couple of them to a horse doctor to see if there is anything he can do. How that horse ever became a doctor, I'll never know.

Seaweed · 07-21-13, 12:48 AM

Originally posted by greenhippo

The Giant. One more good sir.

My animals have been getting sick lately so I took a couple of them to a horse doctor to see if there is anything he can do. How that horse ever became a doctor, I'll never know.

The Giant, end the game we have a winner. A horse doctor, picturing it just makes me burst out in laughter! Where do you come up with them??

mikejamm · 07-21-13, 02:10 AM

Originally posted by Seaweed

Can't believe The Giant gave you points for that sewage.

Originally posted by The Giant

Anytime you can work a colostomy bag into a joke, you deserve points.

Everyone knows that, Seaweed.

Yeah seadouche, Funny and truthful all at the same time!

Besides, isn't there a soccer game already in progress you need post a pick on with your shady handicapping skills?

mikejamm · 07-21-13, 02:13 AM

Originally posted by Seaweed

The Giant, end the game we have a winner. A horse doctor, picturing it just makes me burst out in laughter! Where do you come up with them??

Your colostomy bag sex toy beats that by a mile!

Jayvegas420 · 07-21-13, 02:51 AM

Originally posted by onemoregoal

A man came home from work one day to find his wife on the front porch with her bags packed.

'Just where the heck do you think you're going!', said the man.

'I'm going to Las Vegas', said the wife, 'I just found out I can get $400 a night for what I give you for free!

'The man said, 'Wait a minute!', and then ran inside the house only to come back a few minutes later with his suitcases in hand.

'Where the heck are you going?', said the wife.

The man said, 'I want to see how you're gonna live on $800 a year!'

Good

Originally posted by daneblazer

Good

Originally posted by fitguy67

overheard in a bank, when the local proctologist pulls out a rectal thermometer to sign a check

"some asshole must have my pen"

Good

Originally posted by pinnacle420

A guy enters a bar with a gun..................................... ....................... "who had sex with my wife"-he snarled................................. ................ A voice is heard "you don't have enough bullets mate"

Good

Originally posted by mikejamm

What do you call a dumb fuk who plays with his grandmother's colostomy bag because it's warm and squishy like boobies? Seaweed the virgin!

Already heard that one.

Fidel_CashFlow · 07-21-13, 03:06 AM

This friend of mine had a disgusted look on her face and she said

"Did you know that 2 out of every 3 people live next to a pedophile"

I said... Not me. I live next to two smoking hot 10 year olds

that one was for shock factor Giant.... feel bad over the nature of the joke. But not bad enough to edit it.

Here is a halfway clean funny for you .

I want to die peacefully in my sleep like my grandfather ...
not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car

My girlfriend and I were having sex the other day when she looked at me and said

"Make love to me like in the movies."

So I fukked her in the ass.... pulled out... and came all over her face and hair.

I guess we do not watch the same movies

TheRifleman · 07-21-13, 08:13 AM

Q: How do you starve a negro?

A: Hide his EBT card in his work boots.

TheRifleman · 07-21-13, 08:26 AM

Q: How do you swat 200 flies at one time

A: Hit an Ethiopian in the face with a frying pan.

TheRifleman · 07-21-13, 08:27 AM

Q: What is a redneck virgin?

A: A seven year old that can run faster than her brothers.

Smoke · 07-21-13, 08:27 AM

Thread reopened

TheRifleman · 07-21-13, 08:27 AM

Q: What do you throw a Mexican man when he's drowning?

A: His wife and kids.

TheRifleman · 07-21-13, 08:28 AM

Q: Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito?

A: One stops sucking when you slap it.

TheRifleman · 07-21-13, 08:29 AM

Q: What's long, black and smelly?

A: An unemployment line.

TheRifleman · 07-21-13, 08:30 AM

Q: Why is there so little Puerto Rican literature?

A: Because spray paint wasn't invented until 1949.

TheRifleman · 07-21-13, 08:30 AM

Q: What's the difference between a black man and a pizza?

A: A pizza can feed a family of four.

TheRifleman · 07-21-13, 08:31 AM

Q: What's so good about an Ethiopian blow-job?

A: You know she'll swallow.

TheRifleman · 07-21-13, 08:32 AM

Q: What did the little Negro boy get for Christmas?

A: My bike.

statnerds · 07-21-13, 08:43 AM

Married couple goes to a marriage counselor

Counselor: Let's start with something you have in common.

Husband: Well, neither one of us sucks DlCK

daneblazer · 07-21-13, 08:53 AM

oiler · 07-21-13, 08:54 AM

why is it better to have a white teacher than a black teacher? its easier to carry an apple than a watermelon

Fidel_CashFlow · 07-21-13, 09:01 AM

you guys

Rifleman

easyliving · 07-21-13, 09:59 AM

Q:Whats long and hard on a black person?

A:Third grade

KingJD31 · 07-21-13, 10:16 AM

Rifleman unreal

Jayvegas420 · 07-21-13, 10:34 AM

I'm not bragging & saying I'm really good at sex, like Riffleman's speedy sisters but, I did have sex one night for an hour & five minutes.

Jayvegas420 · 07-21-13, 10:36 AM

It was on the night you turn the clock ahead but, I still think it counts.

pico · 07-21-13, 10:42 AM

http://forum.sbrforum.com/sports-promotions-links/892743-whats-best-joke-world-p48.html

pico · 07-21-13, 10:43 AM

^^^lots of good jokes in that thread.

pico · 07-21-13, 10:46 AM

sky sports news:

Football scores..

England 8 - Ethiopia Didnt

pico · 07-21-13, 10:47 AM

Found my wife' in bed with her vibrator the other day.

Turns out she was cheating on me with Michael J Fox

Kermit · 07-21-13, 10:50 AM

Why can't Miss Piggy count to 70? Because she gets a frog in her throat at 69.

Itsamazing777 · 07-21-13, 02:07 PM

If you're an american, outside of a bathroom,
what are you inside of a bathroom?

European.

James D · 07-21-13, 02:46 PM

The lookout on a British naval ship yells to the commander "commander there is a pirate ship on the horizon coming right at us!" The commander says to his first mate " go alert the men and get my red shirt. " the first mate says " your red shirt commander??" The commander replies " yes I wear my red shirt in battle in case I am injured I do not want my men to see the blood and to panic during battle " at that moment the lookout yells "commander it is not one pirate ship there are ten pirate ships!!!!" The commander looks at his first mate and says " while your down there also get my brown pants"