corporate jargon/phrases you are sick of....

[bobby heenan]

"she older...she knows what she wants"

so im having some drinks on the patio of a nice restaurant on a river with my boy....3 guys come kayaking thru...we know one of them...so we tell him to come up and have some drinks(hes already drinking a beer in his kayak)....he brings up these other two guys...both seem gay...but i guess not...never met these guys....but through convo i realize one of them now dates a local *** dumpster....a girl that tried to get with me once but i have a gf.....he doesnt know i know her....hes talking with the other guy about her....."yeah shes been with quite a few guys around here"....to which my other friend says "yah i know my buddy ____ hooked up with her".....he goes "actually she said he ejaculated on her thight...prematurely i might add" as he laughed.....he was then talking about the early stages of their relationship and said "shes older...she knows what wants".....shes like 28 or so...lol

you have to have a unique perspective on life to talk about your girl and laugh about guys shooting loads on her thigh.....but spare me the routine of talking her up after and making excuses for her sluttery....shes 28 and been through like 40 guys in the town/area for a reason....if i had this girls number and called her...shed be over and swallowing my *** in a matter a minutes.....oh well...not my problem....

"im trying to build a brand"

so this is one ya hear alot...i was watching this show on showtime "gigolos"....mildly entertaining i guess.....so this one fa\*\*ot is trying to start his own line of nutritional supplements line....this is a guy who is a male escort for a living....he meets with a guy that can help him out in the industry....looks at the camera and says "im trying to build a brand"...yep...you can every fuckstick who starts a t shirt, energy drink, nutritional supplement company.....is there a more a vague statement to make? im sure in some MBA class textbook there is a chapter called "building a brand"....but it annoyed me to watch this 40 plus guy with frosted hair say it.....every asshole with an idea thinks their a businessman.....

there are plenty of them....feel free to add some....those are just the two bothering me today

[Doc JS]

At the end of the day...

[paco]

It is what it is?

[bobby heenan]

oh man...both good ones....

but yes paco....that one....fuckin god help me...i want to kill people....stop saying that shit....so vague

[will2survive]

I'm sorry, I didn't read the long paragraph. If you're looking for 3 phrases that I don't like.....


At a restaurant --- "Are you still working on that?" (I fukkin hate that...uh...if I'm still eating....that means my ass is working on it


"What happened" -- when someone says something....sometimes it doesn't fit what they actually said . It's not one of my favorites.

"Blow up my phone" ---no thanks

[HauntingTheHoly]

It is what it is?

Ding! I hate that one. We call lines like this "memes" - no?

I distinctly remember when this one started, maybe 4 years ago or so. I mean it existed well before then of course, but it started being used by absolutely everyone about that time. I'd love to know how. I even catch myself trying to say it, and stop myself everytime. For whatever reason the phrase imprints itself onto people brains super-easy. I'm pissed.

Edit: Does "ding!" count as one of these annoying lines? I've never used it in my life, except for just then. Weird. Ah well, F me.

[Ra77er]

Business as usual

[bobby heenan]

"ill shoot/fire you a text/email"

"touch base".....

i also hate fags at airports who have nothing to do and are bored...so they make a phone call and talk "business"....be a man...open up your laptop, look at lines, and have some fun

[FishFace5]

Guy in front of me starts every sentence with "let me go ahead and......" or some variation of that.
It makes me want to jump the cubicle and choke him out.
Also closes every conversation with "well let me talk this over with my manger and get right back to you"
Kid sounds like a robot. I'm getting fired up just typing this. I'm gonna have to smack this clown sooner than later I think.

[paco]

How about, "havnt seen u in awhile, let's do lunch?"

U havnt seen me in a while cuz I don't like ur punk ass

[opie1988]

What I personally like to do is take advantage of what's in front of me. Grab the low hanging fruit. Then, we implement a plan of attack that will really help us to move the needle, and think outside of the box. Regardless, we need to come up with a game changer. Because, at the end of the day, we have to win. It is what it is.

Best-

Opie

[allenlud23]

How about, "havnt seen u in awhile, let's do lunch?"

U havnt seen me in a while cuz I don't like ur punk ass

I know exactly how you feel. Seriously people, if I wanted to see you, I wouldn't be ignoring you for the past 6 months.

haha

[will2survive]

touch base sounds intelligent--disagree with that one

[shari91]

think outside the box

and anything involving low hanging fruit (opieeeeeeeeee xo) and synergy

[spankie]

I use touch base all the fukin time you pricks.

I get pissed when people say "I think" when you ask them a question. "Wellllll I thinnnnnnnnnnk". ok fukoff.

[Megatron]

"chomping at the bit"

[FishFace5]

I use touch base all the fukin time you pricks. I get pissed when people say "I think" when you ask them a question. "Wellllll I thinnnnnnnnnnk". ok fukoff.

Agreed. Using uummm to space out thoughts is equally as annoying.
Makes you sound like a half a retard.

[mrmarket]

In my opinion
Robust
Net-Net
It is what it is
"blank" -alista
"Life/Whatever Hack"
Staycation
Bucket List
Elevator Pitch
Socialpreneur
Mindshare
Sustainability
Mashup
Bleeding Edge
Scalability

[Ice House]

"it is what it is" -Worst football coach in the NFL John Fox favorite line

[FishFace5]

^^
I love in my opinion. Use that one constantly, especially here and 2+2.
Staycation also makes laugh.
The rest of your list would be things I dont care for, although I dont think they are commonly used phrases\terms in business.

[ShogunRua]

'Just a heads up...'

'I could care less' - people say this to mean they couldn't care less. Fukkin stupid.

[mrmarket]

Hi mrmarket,

I just wanted to touch base with you about the talking points of our upcoming head to head. We should brainstorm and synergize ideas on how to gain a foothold in this market. I'm leaning towards but not committed to focusing on socialpreneurship with green values. I know this economy is tough but we have to think win-win for all our stakeholders.

Remember, if you're not on the bleeding edge in this industry you won't be ahead of the curve. We have to capture the customer mindshare and scale our products accordingly. I mean the VC's won't even take a second look at us until our cash flow is robust. The bottom line is that we need to focus on core competencies going forward. We need actionable items during our elevator pitch which as you know has to be streamlined, authentic and quite frankly best in class at the end of the day.

I'm sure our mashup of ideas will catalyse our motivation but if you could just contextualize the bullet points so we can stoke our creative fires later that would be great.

On a lighter note maybe you can come up to the cabin to see the fam during our staycation. We'll have a little pinot on the deck, get a few links in and puff those cubanos I've got waiting on me in the study. I know marge and little chester are dying to see you. Marge has turned into quite the foodie so expect some fantastic water ripened heirloom vegetables to go along with the sashimi. She was actually trained by a 4th cousin of a famous japanese sushi chef but we don't like to brag

Anyway have a good one

Caio

Random asshole

[flipside2469]

Great thread.

'coming down the pike'
'now they're singing a different tune'
'tail wagging the dog'
'let's circle the wagons'....I use this a ton.
'riding the gravy train with biscuit wheels'
'killing 2 birds with 1 stone'
'push back'
'short fuse fire drill'
'please advise'
'way forward'
'pull the thread'
'Vr'
How about when people have on their signature line 'Thanks!', so that it's there everytime they send out an email?

I have more.

BTW (there's one).....Welcome back, Paco.

[k13]

So sick.

[Deuce]

Hella

I know right

[flipside2469]

'behind the power curve'

[flipside2469]

open kimono
paradigm shift

[opie1988]

Hella

I know right

I noticed this is very popular with the cart girls at the golf club where I play.

[Boner_18]

So you guys are the ones that I get to step over on my way up.

[Delicious]

The word "epic" being misused to the point it has lost all meaning.

[Deuce]

I noticed this is very popular with the cart girls at the golf club where I play.

Honestly, the last person I heard say that was yesterday at the golf course by the beer wench.

[Doc JS]

"When its all said and done"...

[Doc JS]

"Not to put too fine a point on it"...

[Dutch]

"to the nth degree" - What the fuk does that even mean?

And people who use the word "umpteen"

[ThaWoj]

Great thread.

'coming down the pike'
'now they're singing a different tune'
'tail wagging the dog'
'let's circle the wagons'....I use this a ton.
'riding the gravy train with biscuit wheels'
'killing 2 birds with 1 stone'
'push back'
'short fuse fire drill'
'please advise'
'way forward'
'pull the thread'
'Vr'
How about when people have on their signature line 'Thanks!', so that it's there everytime they send out an email?

I have more.

BTW (there's one).....Welcome back, Paco.

What?! thats a def a new one to me