Your longest pee on record?

[armyoflovers]

I once nailed a fly on a rock at LEAST 20 feet away. Man, was he surprised.

Hey man you might want to sign up for the army, with that range and accuracy they could use you in Afghanistan. Maybe you could pee at Bin Laden and piss him off (snicker snicker snff snff)....

[armyoflovers]

p.s. I like a man who can do math.

well heres some more math for you - 9 inches of hot pipe + you naked on my floor = a night to remember.....

[Killer_Demo]

about 2 mins after chugging 3 40's of mickeys

[Nicky Santoro]

army,

i am obsessed with the scale. i weigh myself about, no joke.. about 29 times a day..after each pee, i am always 1 lb less.. and after each time i do #2, i am 2 to 2.5 lbs less, cause i only crap 1-2 times a week, so i make it count..
man, i am jealous of you that you drop 8 lbs in one pee.. that is my fantasy that i can pee for 9 min and drop 9 lbs and do this 3x in one day and drop 27 lbs and be skinny again. i want to lose all my fat off my stomach by just peeing, but that is just a fantasy.. but with you, it's reality.. you are a luck s.o.b.

[slimmdiggity]

Quote:
Originally Posted by Nicky Santoro
boy, that is really impressive.. you're better than me.. those pees must be very long.

army,

no way you pee for 9 minutes. i pee 2-3 times a day only and they are long and i swear, they are always around 1 min long, at best..and i usually weigh myself before and after the pee and i am always 1 lb lighter after the pee.. so if you pee for 9 minutes, then you are saying you lose 9 lbs?

boy, you must be thin as a pole.

Nicky,

Yea bro im not sure how much pee weight I lost but it was somewhere between 7-9 pounds of piss. I was ****ing humming at it, nice steady stream cascading down the hily embankment which lead into a river mouth. I was 201 before and 193 or so after, I lost 4 pant sizes in the process.

I mean the thing is youre telling me that if you pissed a pound of piss a minute that you discharge an ounce of unrination every 4 seconds, thats pretty impressive I would say. But tell me this - how much do your turds weigh? I mean do you step on/off scale pre/post turd? I once had a shit cluster scrape out of my bunghole and it looked like some asteroid from outer space, the sucker weighed 8 lbs, easy. It was like giving birth to a child, man...I still walk bow-legged to this day.

I pissed on the floor in elementary school.Till the teacher came in and saw me.I got her fired for waking in the boys bathroom.

[slimmdiggity]

army,

i am obsessed with the scale. i weigh myself about, no joke.. about 29 times a day..after each pee, i am always 1 lb less.. and after each time i do #2, i am 2 to 2.5 lbs less, cause i only crap 1-2 times a week, so i make it count..
man, i am jealous of you that you drop 8 lbs in one pee.. that is my fantasy that i can pee for 9 min and drop 9 lbs and do this 3x in one day and drop 27 lbs and be skinny again. i want to lose all my fat off my stomach by just peeing, but that is just a fantasy.. but with you, it's reality.. you are a luck s.o.b.

Sounds like you have mental problems. LMAO!

[armyoflovers]

army,

i am obsessed with the scale. i weigh myself about, no joke.. about 29 times a day..after each pee, i am always 1 lb less.. and after each time i do #2, i am 2 to 2.5 lbs less, cause i only crap 1-2 times a week, so i make it count..
man, i am jealous of you that you drop 8 lbs in one pee.. that is my fantasy that i can pee for 9 min and drop 9 lbs and do this 3x in one day and drop 27 lbs and be skinny again. i want to lose all my fat off my stomach by just peeing, but that is just a fantasy.. but with you, it's reality.. you are a luck s.o.b.

Well thank you sir, I hope I am a role model to all of you wanting to have extra-long pees. But dont be a hata brother. I gots a tip for you. If you want to be skinny (and hot) just like me and you want to pee your weight off, I adivse you to first drink water buffalo full of sunny delight, then go tanning and get golden brown and immediately after tanning go into a sauna and sit and there for 2 hours but heres the key, pssst - dont sweat! Just let your bladder absorb all the orange juice piss and once youre done run to the toilet and youll have shed at least 27 lbs of pee!

If you sweat in the sauna, you failed and need to try again another day until you get it right....

[Nicky Santoro]

Well thank you sir, I hope I am a role model to all of you wanting to have extra-long pees. But dont be a hata brother. I gots a tip for you. If you want to be skinny (and hot) just like me and you want to pee your weight off, I adivse you to first drink water buffalo full of sunny delight, then go tanning and get golden brown and immediately after tanning go into a sauna and sit and there for 2 hours but heres the key, pssst - dont sweat! Just let your bladder absorb all the orange juice piss and once youre done run to the toilet and youll have shed at least 27 lbs of pee!

If you sweat in the sauna, you failed and need to try again another day until you get it right....

now you really got me confused.. what's a sunny d water buffalo, never heard of it. and why that drink only.

why do you have to go to a tanning salon and get all brown to pee.

how can you sit in a sauna for 2 hrs.. you're not supposed to stay in there for more than 15 min they say.. i cant breathe after 25 min.

and how do you not sweat in a sauna.. how can i control that, and how do i let my bladder absorb the orange juice


ok, if your post was just being funny, you don't have to answer, but if not, pls tell me all this.. i want to know how to rid my body of all that water. i was told by many that my weight is only water weight, so this info is big. and you are the pee expert..

[pavyracer]

now you really got me confused.. what's a sunny d water buffalo, never heard of it. and why that drink only.

why do you have to go to a tanning salon and get all brown to pee.

how can you sit in a sauna for 2 hrs.. you're not supposed to stay in there for more than 15 min they say.. i cant breathe after 25 min.

and how do you not sweat in a sauna.. how can i control that, and how do i let my bladder absorb the orange juice


ok, if your post was just being funny, you don't have to answer, but if not, pls tell me all this.. i want to know how to rid my body of all that water. i was told by many that my weight is only water weight, so this info is big. and you are the pee expert..

http://www.sunnyd.com/home_orig.shtml

[smitch124]

I don't keep a stopwatch in the bathroom it leaves a ring on the counter

[armyoflovers]

now you really got me confused.. what's a sunny d water buffalo, never heard of it. and why that drink only.

why do you have to go to a tanning salon and get all brown to pee.

how can you sit in a sauna for 2 hrs.. you're not supposed to stay in there for more than 15 min they say.. i cant breathe after 25 min.

and how do you not sweat in a sauna.. how can i control that, and how do i let my bladder absorb the orange juice


ok, if your post was just being funny, you don't have to answer, but if not, pls tell me all this.. i want to know how to rid my body of all that water. i was told by many that my weight is only water weight, so this info is big. and you are the pee expert..

The tanning hardens your skin so it wont sweat....then you have to wrap yourself in saran wrap so you keep all sweat bottled up inside your body. Once youre done youll pee out the sweat and viola! youll have lost 27 lbs!

[Nicky Santoro]

The tanning hardens your skin so it wont sweat....then you have to wrap yourself in saran wrap so you keep all sweat bottled up inside your body. Once youre done youll pee out the sweat and viola! youll have lost 27 lbs!

wow, i never thought of this.. are you serious? i never knew this. i'd think that this can be dangerous, no? i might not try the tanning salon cause of an article that just came out all over here about how those rays cause cancer now.. but i will try the saran wrap.. i still don't see how the sweat can't come out because of the saran wrap, but wow.. i will try this one day. thanks armyoflowers.

[armyoflovers]

works like a wonder, saran wrap makes you pee a lot, when you first digest copius amounts of sunny delight....

[spoodle]

i know what you mean... i just finished a 3 minute one and it was such a relief on my bladder i felt like i just had released a huge load after a massage at the rub n tug.

[ChuckyTheGoat]

i swear no one at sbr has a bigger bladder than me.. i piss 2 times a day.. i can drink 6 coffees, 3 cokes in 5 hrs and still not piss.

my longest pee took place on June 1987.. i will never forget.. i was at an expos game and i drank 6 beers and hadn't pissed since the morning.. when we left stadium, it took us 1.5 hrs to get out cause there were 50,000 fans.. there was no washroom.. when i finally made it, wow, what a feeling.. it was a 1 min 29 piss.. wow.. best piss ever

and i also have a huge colon.. i crap 1 time a week only but some great sized craps i have.. my longest crap happened on vacation in boston with my buddies.. i swear i had eaten shit for 4 days.. just mcd's and pizza.. it happened on July 1984 on my final day at the motel.. a 26 inch log that wrapped around the bowl 4x without breaking.. i left it there for the maid on the last day.. i swear she went in the room, then ran out with her face covered.. my friends loved it.. what a great scene..

A sick gambler classic.

Also...fukk Rex Ryan.

[NYSportsGuy210]

I think I once went 2 minutes 5 seconds.

[jose21_us]

I got food poison last thanksgiving and sat on the shitters for 5 min. and it was like piss was coming out of my ass. Worse feeling in the world and as soon as I was done. I nearly passed out and went to the emergency room....

[ttwarrior1]

i like to piss in the kitchen sink, just the right height