Biggest cash game haul of my life last night
Had to share this, I'm a subpar cash game player at best and usually buyin anywhere from $200-400 at a 1/3 game where there's good action usually pots anywhere from $100 to 1k+. My previous personally record was buying in for $200 and cashing out $600 (usually I lose my buyin or make about about $100). Last night I went to this game pretty drunk and played a solid 5 hours. There was a new guy who was probably 80 years old w a gf in her 20s who literally just sat and watched his chips when he got up to piss. He was the worst player I've ever seen. He would straddle and restraddle $25-$50 almost every hand and then make ridiculous raises. I'm talking betting $500 preflop on a $50 pot almost every hand. Once he didn't straddle and bet $150 with just the blinds ($4) in the pot. Everyone was licking their chops and he bought in for $3500 (normal buyin $200-500 but occasional 1k) and lost it all in less than 30 min. I laughed at him once (was drunk, shouldn't have rocked the boat) when he called a $500 river bet when he was literally playing the board. After that he called my a punk so my drunkass was like I'll beat your ass if you call me that again so he did and then the guy who runs the game pulled me aside and told me to stfu or leave. So after that I just stayed quiet and doubled off him a couple more times along with the rest of the table. Final stats, bought in for $250 cashed out $2k 
