Dear JoJo Dating Advice, submit your questions and win points

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  • SBR Jonelyn
    SBR MVP
    • 03-09-12
    • 2282

    #1
    Dear JoJo Dating Advice, submit your questions and win points
    Jojo, my split personality, believes she’s an expert on relationships. 4 relationship questions per month will be selected from SBR Forum posters to be answered in a video. The questions which are used get 250 points in freeplay each.

    Post your questions in this thread. Good Luck fellas!
  • easyliving
    SBR Hall of Famer
    • 06-25-12
    • 8876

    #2
    What does a guy have to do around here to get a date with you?
    Comment
    • SBR Jonelyn
      SBR MVP
      • 03-09-12
      • 2282

      #3
      Originally posted by easyliving
      What does a guy have to do around here to get a date with you?
      hmmm. that's a good question easyliving.
      Comment
      • CarpeDime
        SBR Hall of Famer
        • 09-01-09
        • 7873

        #4
        Dear Joynellen,

        Basically, my place is a complete fukin pig-sty. I mean, not like a drug addict lives there or anything, just like, you know, clothes all over the place, floors haven't been washed in years, filthy shower curtain, dishes haven't been washed in months, etc etc.

        The main reason is just because I am too lazy too clean, and too weirded-out by a maid to have one, and basically have zero game so pulling a broad is most of the time not on the table. But, a few times a year, circumstances conspire, shall we say, to make it so that a broad does enter into the picture.

        Every time that happens, I don't know what to do. Should I make up some lie about why she can't come over? Should I just have her over and say "yeah, this is how I live"? Should I tell her she can't come over, and be honest about why?

        This happened to me just this past weekend. I went to Fashion Week Costa Rica, and pulled a fukin designer broad. Not a 10, but not bad. Full-figured, enormous bombs, huge fukin jiggly azz. Ok face, huge ears that stick way the fuk out, looks kind like an alien when hair is up, but much better when hair is down covering the ears. Whatever, I was into it.

        Now, keep in mind, I was ALL fukin decked out to the 9s, you feel me?? Fukin SAVILLE ROW jacket, Jonollyn I am not BSing you here, I am for real. Fukin NICE Ralph Lauren BLACK LABEL corduroy pants, you feel me?? Johnston & Murphy shoes.

        So I'm hanging with this broad and one of her fukin MODEL friends, a fukin legit 10, and the model's DJ boyfriend. I'm making jokes, the model LOVES me, right? We are driving home, and the designer wants to come to my house. I'm fukin furious at myself, can't figure out what to do.

        I decide to just tell her she can't come over, and I tell her the honest reason why. She looks at me kind of weird, kind of like she still likes me but doesn't really know what to think. They drop me off, I'm sure the fukin model and DJ boyfriend in the front seat wondering why she isn't sleeping over. Who knows what the fuk they were saying after I got out.

        Anyway, what should I do in this situation? Did I do the right thing? Should I/Could I have done something better?
        Comment
        • Smoke
          SBR Aristocracy
          • 10-09-09
          • 48111

          #5
          Dear Jonie,

          This girl that I met at a bar and brought back to my home is now stalking me. Shes outside my windows at night when I shower. Shes at my front door in the morning when I get the newspaper. I cant seem to escape her. I dont like her I was drunk. What should I do?
          Comment
          • Vegas39
            BARRELED IN @ SBR!
            • 09-22-11
            • 30686

            #6
            Originally posted by Smoke
            Dear Jonie,

            This girl that I met at a bar and brought back to my home is now stalking me. Shes outside my windows at night when I shower. Shes at my front door in the morning when I get the newspaper. I cant seem to escape her. I dont like her I was drunk. What should I do?

            Ypu still get the newspaper
            Comment
            • Smoke
              SBR Aristocracy
              • 10-09-09
              • 48111

              #7
              Originally posted by Vegas39
              Ypu still get the newspaper
              Yes. Im old school guey
              Comment
              • SprayBoy
                SBR Sharp
                • 11-18-10
                • 390

                #8
                Originally posted by CarpeDime
                Dear Joynellen,

                Basically, my place is a complete fukin pig-sty. I mean, not like a drug addict lives there or anything, just like, you know, clothes all over the place, floors haven't been washed in years, filthy shower curtain, dishes haven't been washed in months, etc etc.

                The main reason is just because I am too lazy too clean, and too weirded-out by a maid to have one, and basically have zero game so pulling a broad is most of the time not on the table. But, a few times a year, circumstances conspire, shall we say, to make it so that a broad does enter into the picture.

                Every time that happens, I don't know what to do. Should I make up some lie about why she can't come over? Should I just have her over and say "yeah, this is how I live"? Should I tell her she can't come over, and be honest about why?

                This happened to me just this past weekend. I went to Fashion Week Costa Rica, and pulled a fukin designer broad. Not a 10, but not bad. Full-figured, enormous bombs, huge fukin jiggly azz. Ok face, huge ears that stick way the fuk out, looks kind like an alien when hair is up, but much better when hair is down covering the ears. Whatever, I was into it.

                Now, keep in mind, I was ALL fukin decked out to the 9s, you feel me?? Fukin SAVILLE ROW jacket, Jonollyn I am not BSing you here, I am for real. Fukin NICE Ralph Lauren BLACK LABEL corduroy pants, you feel me?? Johnston & Murphy shoes.

                So I'm hanging with this broad and one of her fukin MODEL friends, a fukin legit 10, and the model's DJ boyfriend. I'm making jokes, the model LOVES me, right? We are driving home, and the designer wants to come to my house. I'm fukin furious at myself, can't figure out what to do.

                I decide to just tell her she can't come over, and I tell her the honest reason why. She looks at me kind of weird, kind of like she still likes me but doesn't really know what to think. They drop me off, I'm sure the fukin model and DJ boyfriend in the front seat wondering why she isn't sleeping over. Who knows what the fuk they were saying after I got out.

                Anyway, what should I do in this situation? Did I do the right thing? Should I/Could I have done something better?
                Solution: clean your house.
                Comment
                • Thor4140
                  SBR Posting Legend
                  • 02-09-08
                  • 22277

                  #9
                  Originally posted by CarpeDime
                  Dear Joynellen,

                  Basically, my place is a complete fukin pig-sty. I mean, not like a drug addict lives there or anything, just like, you know, clothes all over the place, floors haven't been washed in years, filthy shower curtain, dishes haven't been washed in months, etc etc.

                  The main reason is just because I am too lazy too clean, and too weirded-out by a maid to have one, and basically have zero game so pulling a broad is most of the time not on the table. But, a few times a year, circumstances conspire, shall we say, to make it so that a broad does enter into the picture.

                  Every time that happens, I don't know what to do. Should I make up some lie about why she can't come over? Should I just have her over and say "yeah, this is how I live"? Should I tell her she can't come over, and be honest about why?

                  This happened to me just this past weekend. I went to Fashion Week Costa Rica, and pulled a fukin designer broad. Not a 10, but not bad. Full-figured, enormous bombs, huge fukin jiggly azz. Ok face, huge ears that stick way the fuk out, looks kind like an alien when hair is up, but much better when hair is down covering the ears. Whatever, I was into it.

                  Now, keep in mind, I was ALL fukin decked out to the 9s, you feel me?? Fukin SAVILLE ROW jacket, Jonollyn I am not BSing you here, I am for real. Fukin NICE Ralph Lauren BLACK LABEL corduroy pants, you feel me?? Johnston & Murphy shoes.

                  So I'm hanging with this broad and one of her fukin MODEL friends, a fukin legit 10, and the model's DJ boyfriend. I'm making jokes, the model LOVES me, right? We are driving home, and the designer wants to come to my house. I'm fukin furious at myself, can't figure out what to do.

                  I decide to just tell her she can't come over, and I tell her the honest reason why. She looks at me kind of weird, kind of like she still likes me but doesn't really know what to think. They drop me off, I'm sure the fukin model and DJ boyfriend in the front seat wondering why she isn't sleeping over. Who knows what the fuk they were saying after I got out.

                  Anyway, what should I do in this situation? Did I do the right thing? Should I/Could I have done something better?
                  how bout try cleaning the house ya filty bastard?
                  Comment
                  • Mikeyanks23
                    SBR MVP
                    • 11-30-10
                    • 4517

                    #10
                    Originally posted by Smoke
                    Dear Jonie,

                    This girl that I met at a bar and brought back to my home is now stalking me. Shes outside my windows at night when I shower. Shes at my front door in the morning when I get the newspaper. I cant seem to escape her. I dont like her I was drunk. What should I do?

                    sorry i'll stop


                    you couldve just told me

                    you didnt have to post on it online for me to find when your in the shower and i sneak in and browse your internet history
                    Comment
                    • TheCentaur
                      SBR Hall of Famer
                      • 06-28-11
                      • 8108

                      #11
                      Originally posted by CarpeDime
                      Dear Joynellen,

                      Basically, my place is a complete fukin pig-sty. I mean, not like a drug addict lives there or anything, just like, you know, clothes all over the place, floors haven't been washed in years, filthy shower curtain, dishes haven't been washed in months, etc etc.

                      The main reason is just because I am too lazy too clean, and too weirded-out by a maid to have one, and basically have zero game so pulling a broad is most of the time not on the table. But, a few times a year, circumstances conspire, shall we say, to make it so that a broad does enter into the picture.

                      Every time that happens, I don't know what to do. Should I make up some lie about why she can't come over? Should I just have her over and say "yeah, this is how I live"? Should I tell her she can't come over, and be honest about why?

                      This happened to me just this past weekend. I went to Fashion Week Costa Rica, and pulled a fukin designer broad. Not a 10, but not bad. Full-figured, enormous bombs, huge fukin jiggly azz. Ok face, huge ears that stick way the fuk out, looks kind like an alien when hair is up, but much better when hair is down covering the ears. Whatever, I was into it.

                      Now, keep in mind, I was ALL fukin decked out to the 9s, you feel me?? Fukin SAVILLE ROW jacket, Jonollyn I am not BSing you here, I am for real. Fukin NICE Ralph Lauren BLACK LABEL corduroy pants, you feel me?? Johnston & Murphy shoes.

                      So I'm hanging with this broad and one of her fukin MODEL friends, a fukin legit 10, and the model's DJ boyfriend. I'm making jokes, the model LOVES me, right? We are driving home, and the designer wants to come to my house. I'm fukin furious at myself, can't figure out what to do.

                      I decide to just tell her she can't come over, and I tell her the honest reason why. She looks at me kind of weird, kind of like she still likes me but doesn't really know what to think. They drop me off, I'm sure the fukin model and DJ boyfriend in the front seat wondering why she isn't sleeping over. Who knows what the fuk they were saying after I got out.

                      Anyway, what should I do in this situation? Did I do the right thing? Should I/Could I have done something better?
                      Get a hotel room
                      Comment
                      • PAULYPOKER
                        BARRELED IN @ SBR!
                        • 12-06-08
                        • 36581

                        #12
                        Is "love ya longtime" a myth or a fact?
                        Comment
                        • TheCentaur
                          SBR Hall of Famer
                          • 06-28-11
                          • 8108

                          #13
                          Originally posted by Smoke
                          Dear Jonie,

                          This girl that I met at a bar and brought back to my home is now stalking me. Shes outside my windows at night when I shower. Shes at my front door in the morning when I get the newspaper. I cant seem to escape her. I dont like her I was drunk. What should I do?
                          For those that are easily nauseated read no further...

                          Smoke eat a leafy vegetabley kind of diet (preferably plenty of cabbage) one day and take all ur dumps that day in the guest toilet without flushing. Remember not to flush

                          Wait a day or two for it to properly ferment and then invite him/her over. Sooner or later he'll/she'll need to go to that guest restroom and he'll/she'll never want to be anywhere near that stinker of yours again.
                          Comment
                          • Smoke
                            SBR Aristocracy
                            • 10-09-09
                            • 48111

                            #14
                            Originally posted by Mikeyanks23
                            sorry i'll stop


                            you couldve just told me

                            you didnt have to post on it online for me to find when your in the shower and i sneak in and browse your internet history
                            you son of a bitch
                            Comment
                            • Smoke
                              SBR Aristocracy
                              • 10-09-09
                              • 48111

                              #15
                              Originally posted by TheCentaur
                              For those that are easily nauseated read no further...

                              Smoke eat a leafy vegetabley kind of diet (preferably plenty of cabbage) one day and take all ur dumps that day in the guest toilet without flushing. Remember not to flush

                              Wait a day or two for it to properly ferment and then invite him/her over. Sooner or later he'll/she'll need to go to that guest restroom and he'll/she'll never want to be anywhere near that stinker of yours again.
                              thanks for the advice but this chick is freaky. Half her body is tatted and she loves whiskey. I was so doorukn that night I just pounded her but when I woke up I was like wut the fukk.. washed my dick off 3 times n didnt wear a rubber
                              Comment
                              • Tseay
                                SBR High Roller
                                • 10-29-10
                                • 176

                                #16
                                Originally posted by CarpeDime
                                Dear Joynellen,

                                Basically, my place is a complete fukin pig-sty. I mean, not like a drug addict lives there or anything, just like, you know, clothes all over the place, floors haven't been washed in years, filthy shower curtain, dishes haven't been washed in months, etc etc.

                                The main reason is just because I am too lazy too clean, and too weirded-out by a maid to have one, and basically have zero game so pulling a broad is most of the time not on the table. But, a few times a year, circumstances conspire, shall we say, to make it so that a broad does enter into the picture.

                                Every time that happens, I don't know what to do. Should I make up some lie about why she can't come over? Should I just have her over and say "yeah, this is how I live"? Should I tell her she can't come over, and be honest about why?

                                This happened to me just this past weekend. I went to Fashion Week Costa Rica, and pulled a fukin designer broad. Not a 10, but not bad. Full-figured, enormous bombs, huge fukin jiggly azz. Ok face, huge ears that stick way the fuk out, looks kind like an alien when hair is up, but much better when hair is down covering the ears. Whatever, I was into it.

                                Now, keep in mind, I was ALL fukin decked out to the 9s, you feel me?? Fukin SAVILLE ROW jacket, Jonollyn I am not BSing you here, I am for real. Fukin NICE Ralph Lauren BLACK LABEL corduroy pants, you feel me?? Johnston & Murphy shoes.

                                So I'm hanging with this broad and one of her fukin MODEL friends, a fukin legit 10, and the model's DJ boyfriend. I'm making jokes, the model LOVES me, right? We are driving home, and the designer wants to come to my house. I'm fukin furious at myself, can't figure out what to do.

                                I decide to just tell her she can't come over, and I tell her the honest reason why. She looks at me kind of weird, kind of like she still likes me but doesn't really know what to think. They drop me off, I'm sure the fukin model and DJ boyfriend in the front seat wondering why she isn't sleeping over. Who knows what the fuk they were saying after I got out.

                                Anyway, what should I do in this situation? Did I do the right thing? Should I/Could I have done something better?

                                Her name is Jonelyn.
                                Comment
                                • SBR Jonelyn
                                  SBR MVP
                                  • 03-09-12
                                  • 2282

                                  #17
                                  Originally posted by Tseay
                                  Her name is Jonelyn.
                                  You're right Tseay. Loshak is bad
                                  Comment
                                  • shaunovery
                                    SBR Posting Legend
                                    • 11-15-07
                                    • 18143

                                    #18
                                    jojo do you need a husband
                                    Comment
                                    • Chi_archie
                                      SBR Aristocracy
                                      • 07-22-08
                                      • 63182

                                      #19
                                      JoJo, can you help me convince my wife, (BigAL) that posters here are NOT lame non-people? maybe you could make her a video extolling some of our collective virtues as posters....

                                      this has been a long on-going battle as you can see from this old old thread and video of my wife.

                                      Comment
                                      • BigDeem5
                                        SBR Posting Legend
                                        • 02-26-11
                                        • 17191

                                        #20
                                        JoJo, how do you eat a girl out w/o contracting throat cancer ?
                                        Comment
                                        • ProPicker713
                                          SBR Hall of Famer
                                          • 12-15-10
                                          • 6788

                                          #21
                                          Dear Jojo, have you ever slept with a degen before?
                                          Comment
                                          • runner5k
                                            SBR MVP
                                            • 04-08-11
                                            • 2658

                                            #22
                                            Jojo please rank the top 5 posters you think are relationship material here at SBR
                                            Comment
                                            • Kindred
                                              SBR MVP
                                              • 09-09-08
                                              • 2903

                                              #23
                                              Originally posted by CarpeDime
                                              Dear Joynellen,

                                              Basically, my place is a complete fukin pig-sty. I mean, not like a drug addict lives there or anything, just like, you know, clothes all over the place, floors haven't been washed in years, filthy shower curtain, dishes haven't been washed in months, etc etc.

                                              The main reason is just because I am too lazy too clean, and too weirded-out by a maid to have one, and basically have zero game so pulling a broad is most of the time not on the table. But, a few times a year, circumstances conspire, shall we say, to make it so that a broad does enter into the picture.

                                              Every time that happens, I don't know what to do. Should I make up some lie about why she can't come over? Should I just have her over and say "yeah, this is how I live"? Should I tell her she can't come over, and be honest about why?

                                              This happened to me just this past weekend. I went to Fashion Week Costa Rica, and pulled a fukin designer broad. Not a 10, but not bad. Full-figured, enormous bombs, huge fukin jiggly azz. Ok face, huge ears that stick way the fuk out, looks kind like an alien when hair is up, but much better when hair is down covering the ears. Whatever, I was into it.

                                              Now, keep in mind, I was ALL fukin decked out to the 9s, you feel me?? Fukin SAVILLE ROW jacket, Jonollyn I am not BSing you here, I am for real. Fukin NICE Ralph Lauren BLACK LABEL corduroy pants, you feel me?? Johnston & Murphy shoes.

                                              So I'm hanging with this broad and one of her fukin MODEL friends, a fukin legit 10, and the model's DJ boyfriend. I'm making jokes, the model LOVES me, right? We are driving home, and the designer wants to come to my house. I'm fukin furious at myself, can't figure out what to do.

                                              I decide to just tell her she can't come over, and I tell her the honest reason why. She looks at me kind of weird, kind of like she still likes me but doesn't really know what to think. They drop me off, I'm sure the fukin model and DJ boyfriend in the front seat wondering why she isn't sleeping over. Who knows what the fuk they were saying after I got out.

                                              Anyway, what should I do in this situation? Did I do the right thing? Should I/Could I have done something better?
                                              Stick to hookers, and/or find one of those topless maid services so you're not weirded out by the maid, you'll be staring at her

                                              Or you could do the boring thing and clean your fuckkin house
                                              Comment
                                              • BennyBigNuts
                                                SBR Hall of Famer
                                                • 04-16-12
                                                • 8700

                                                #24
                                                Is this SBR's strategy to bolster the forum strength?
                                                Christ.
                                                I have an automatic winner for a question, but I don't want to get permanently banned at the moment.
                                                Comment
                                                • CarpeDime
                                                  SBR Hall of Famer
                                                  • 09-01-09
                                                  • 7873

                                                  #25
                                                  Originally posted by BennyBigNuts
                                                  Is this SBR's strategy to bolster the forum strength?
                                                  um yes and its going to work

                                                  dont hate on success pal its a bad look
                                                  Comment
                                                  • ChalkyDog
                                                    SBR Hall of Famer
                                                    • 10-02-11
                                                    • 9598

                                                    #26
                                                    Dear Jojo,

                                                    My wife is a casual sports watcher, and can pick winners at a higher rate than me.

                                                    The problem is, if I start playing her plays - I feel like a borderline cuckold.

                                                    Advice?
                                                    Comment
                                                    • robmpink
                                                      SBR Posting Legend
                                                      • 01-09-07
                                                      • 13205

                                                      #27
                                                      Originally posted by SBR Jonelyn
                                                      Jojo, my split personality, believes she’s an expert on relationships. 4 relationship questions per month will be selected from SBR Forum posters to be answered in a video. The questions which are used get 250 points in freeplay each.

                                                      Post your questions in this thread. Good Luck fellas!

                                                      Wow, are you sure you aren't pushing yourself past the brink by answering four questions a month? I like the idea, a lot, but you could be doing this in a weekly segment. Forget about the points given out. Just roll w/ the idea on a weekly basis.
                                                      Comment
                                                      • KingJD31
                                                        SBR Hall of Famer
                                                        • 11-04-11
                                                        • 8167

                                                        #28
                                                        I'm talking to a few girls but would never date most of them, only smash. The one chick that i would consider dating is acting like a little oyster lately, should i kill her quickly or slowly?
                                                        Comment
                                                        • bradthebloke
                                                          SBR MVP
                                                          • 07-26-09
                                                          • 3175

                                                          #29
                                                          Where's Hoffa
                                                          Comment
                                                          • I/O
                                                            SBR Hall of Famer
                                                            • 05-26-11
                                                            • 7922

                                                            #30
                                                            Originally posted by robmpink
                                                            Wow, are you sure you aren't pushing yourself past the brink by answering four questions a month naked in a video ? I like the idea, a lot, but you could be doing this in a weekly segment. Forget about the points given out. Just roll w/ the idea on a weekly basis.
                                                            Comment
                                                            • tony_come
                                                              SBR Posting Legend
                                                              • 03-31-10
                                                              • 21695

                                                              #31
                                                              Spurs/heat series winner?!?!
                                                              Comment
                                                              • ApricotSinner32
                                                                Restricted User
                                                                • 11-28-10
                                                                • 10648

                                                                #32
                                                                Jojo are you dtf on the first date? Not that I give a fuk.
                                                                Comment
                                                                • broadway6
                                                                  SBR Posting Legend
                                                                  • 11-14-09
                                                                  • 13337

                                                                  #33
                                                                  Jojo,

                                                                  Is your favorite bird the swallow?
                                                                  Comment
                                                                  • hugh_morris
                                                                    SBR MVP
                                                                    • 11-17-09
                                                                    • 2039

                                                                    #34
                                                                    Isn't this considered "saloon" shit?......But anyway, here's the issue, my rooster is 2 in. .....from the ground, its alway's getting caught on manhole covers, stumps etc....Is there anyway to tote this fukker around other than the wicker basket I been coiling him up in?.....peace
                                                                    Comment
                                                                    • BigDeem5
                                                                      SBR Posting Legend
                                                                      • 02-26-11
                                                                      • 17191

                                                                      #35
                                                                      Jo Jo, is fisting pleasurable for women?
                                                                      Comment
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