Young Silver Medal Cyclist girl commits suicide says F it

[Andy117]

I had full depression for a month.. I wanted to end my life.. NO LIE.. I just knew things would get better and they did.. If they didn't I would have gotten help.. I literally laid in my bed for a month after slamming my head on solid concrete..

I didn't know for sure if I'd get better but even in my deepest depression I would never give up and take my own life to escape it..

Everyone is built different though...

I've known mentally ill people, hearing voices in their heads constantly, talking to themselves, etc.. it was mostly all brought on by hard drug use and a poor diet. Lack of sleep. That's keeping it real..

It's not a disease in most cases, it's brought on by the individuals poor life styles and choices made in life..

You wanted to end your life within a month of depression. Imagine suffering from depression for years.
If you still thought things would eventually get better than you weren't even at the depths of what depression can be.

[blankoblanco]

You wanted to end your life within a month of depression. Imagine suffering from depression for years.
If you still thought things would eventually get better than you weren't even at the depths of what depression can be.

Ding ding ding, we have another person who gets it

[JIBBBY]

You wanted to end your life within a month of depression. Imagine suffering from depression for years.
If you still thought things would eventually get better than you weren't even at the depths of what depression can be.

Even though I felt a full month of DEEP DEPRESSION and never left the bed I trusted in GOD and I knew it would get better.. I don't expect people of no faith to understand this..

When I had a severe concuss the room was spinning on me and it wouldn't stop.. I forced myself not to go to sleep because I knew that was bad.. I pounded 8 advils and stayed up because I knew that might reduce the swelling.. I played it tough and would not see a doctor.. I said if I'm to go then I go..

Gutted it out.. You boys have no idea what I went thru.. If it lasted much longer I would have looked for help or just died in my sleep the following day.. I WOULD NOT HAVE EVER ENDED MY LIFE BY MY OWN HANDS..

Believe me when I say my world was SHIIIT!! I didn't want to talk to anyone, see anyone, I just laid in bed.. I could not work out because my head hurt.. It took a full year before I even entertained the thought of someone hitting my head or bumping my head..

I can't explain what I went thru but it was A SEVERE CONCUSS that's all I know.. Lucky I didn't die.. I'm sure I had swelling on the brain because the room would not spinning for a full day.. I was in a world of shiiit. I kid you not.. Took a full month or two to recover to my normal self almost.


I'm a happy go lucky guy by nature but that head hit rocked my WORLD!!! No lie!!!

First time I ever experienced massive depression.. Never thought of suicide.. I thought how can I recover instead.. Give it time I thought.. Sure enough time healed me..

I'm 100% recovered today no ill effects.. Is what it is ANDY...

[The Kraken]

Cant even take a hit to the head without wanting to kill yourself

Imagine if you ever get a cold, or a hang nail, im not sure you could survive those

[The Kraken]

I just re-read your last post Jibby and I laughed even harder the second time

Thats a gem!

You “gutted it out”
So bad you had to pound 8 ADVILS

Oh man, instant classic

[JIBBBY]

I just re-read your last post Jibby and I laughed even harder the second time

Thats a gem!

You “gutted it out”
So bad you had to pound 8 ADVILS

Oh man, instant classic

I know.. Not very bright of me to do what I did.. I pulled through..

Blood thinners like Advil wasn't a bright idea also I agree but it did stop the room from spinning when I lied down.. Might of took down the swelling a bit too..

[JIBBBY]

In other news GEORGE FORMANS daughter just committed suicide yesterday.

https://sports.yahoo.com/autopsy-shows-george-foremans-daughter-freeda-foreman-died-suicide-42-214627584.html

[PittsburghPlayer]

JIBBBY who I often agree with is wrong
you do not know depression until you are looking like Mel Gibson in Lethal Weapon
a rare strong breed that considers eating lead for the hate he has seen,
experienced

what you were is afraid (very NORMAL) more than depressed

[JIBBBY]

JIBBBY who I often agree with is wrong
you do not know depression until you are looking like Mel Gibson in Lethal Weapon
a rare strong breed that considers eating lead for the hate he has seen,
experienced

what you were is afraid (very NORMAL) more than depressed

You're wrong as I know what I was feeling and going thru.. It wasn't fear of dying or anything like that. Maybe a little fear of not getting better but not really even that...

I just was stuck in a dark place and I couldn't get out of it, no hope, no future happy thoughts, my thoughts were all dark, just miserable and stuck in a horrible mood. Didn't want to see or talk to anyone, didn't wanna leave my house or bed.. This went on for a full month. I was experiencing severe depression period for the first time in my life. It REALLY sucked!!!

I wish that on no one. It's terrible and a desperate mental state to be in.

[Cuse0323]

Oh Jibs. I love ya, but you’re off on this one. Clinical depression is a whole different animal than what you felt. I won’t ramble on, but you look a bit foolish here pal. Happens to the best of us. Carry on.

[JIBBBY]

^^ You guys are funny.. You guys weren't in my shoes, you don't know..

I never said I had clinical depression, I just said I had a taste of it for a full month for the first time in my life. I know what I experienced and it was not fun!!!

It was like not wanting to live, nothing to live for, no hope.. Just very hopeless dark thinking constantly. No way to stop it. That's the best way I can describe what I was feeling.

If that's not full blown depression I don't know what is? It was a living hell for me.. NO LIE!!!

[Cuse0323]

I think we know what you’re saying. Just don’t think you know what everyone else is saying. Understand what you mean about where you were at. Not a fun place. Not everyone has the ability to look at the bigger picture though. Or the belief in a higher power to get them through it. Some just don’t see any way out of the pain besides suicide. I’ve been through it for as long as I can remember. I was lucky enough to be blessed with the ability to think it through. Though if I had a gun then no chance I’d be here. Zero.

Thankfully I can say that I’m in a really good spot right now. Finally got myself a great girl, and on the proper medication. Life is good again. With all that, I still have thoughts of ending it. It’s a bitch. All I can say is just imagine having those feelings you did and them never going away. Of course it’s all relative to the individual, so I can never blame someone or call them cowardly or selfish for ending it.

[JIBBBY]

I think we know what you’re saying. Just don’t think you know what everyone else is saying. Understand what you mean about where you were at. Not a fun place. Not everyone has the ability to look at the bigger picture though. Or the belief in a higher power to get them through it. Some just don’t see any way out of the pain besides suicide. I’ve been through it for as long as I can remember. I was lucky enough to be blessed with the ability to think it through. Though if I had a gun then no chance I’d be here. Zero.

Thankfully I can say that I’m in a really good spot right now. Finally got myself a great girl, and on the proper medication. Life is good again. With all that, I still have thoughts of ending it. It’s a bitch. All I can say is just imagine having those feelings you did and them never going away. Of course it’s all relative to the individual, so I can never blame someone or call them cowardly or selfish for ending it.

That's deep Cuse.. Glad you are at a better place in your life today, that's awesome!!

Clinical Depression absolutely sucks assss especially if it never goes away on it's own, I do feel for people that suffer from that.. That's a living hell... Lucky they do have happy meds, although some of those mind altering meds can turn you into a walking zombie.. Just dims everything to the point where you are numb and dumb. Happy meds suck to but I guess they work for some people..

I'm glad you can think it thru now logically and not get stuck in that dark place. Pulling the trigger is an escape when you really think you can't ever escape from that dark sinking place in your mind and thoughts... I get it and I understand it..

I still am a firm believer in Cardio work outs for mental health, long runs or bike rides to fight chronic depression.. It's hard to be unhappy and miserable after a 1 or 2 hour workout.. It really is.. That's a natural happy drug in my opinion..

[bigtymer56]

I still am a firm believer in Cardio work outs for mental health, long runs or bike rides to fight chronic depression.. It's hard to be unhappy and miserable after a 1 or 2 hour workout.. It really is.. That's a natural happy drug in my opinion..

This dude really posted this in a thread about a cyclist committing suicide.

[Cuse0323]

This dude really posted this in a thread about a cyclist committing suicide.

[The Kraken]

[maggiethebestdog]

This dude really posted this in a thread about a cyclist committing suicide.

Nothing new for the egomaniac uneducated pathetic loser that is Jibby

[JIBBBY]

This dude really posted this in a thread about a cyclist committing suicide.

That is funny..

Maybe she stopped cycling and got fat, started smoking weed and became a lazy couch potato!! Started to isolate and finally went insane in the brain..

[JIBBBY]

Nothing new for the egomaniac uneducated pathetic loser that is Jibby

Egomaniac and uneducated you say? Hmmm? I've never been called that before. If so no need to continue on and say I'm a pathetic loser also. One would only assume that being egotistical and uneducated you would already be a pathetic loser right? Don't be repetitious pal.

Let me know how ya really feel about me next time, don't hold back..

[maggiethebestdog]

Egomaniac and uneducated you say? Hmmm? I've never been called that before. If so no need to continue on and say I'm a pathetic loser also. One would only assume that being egotistical and uneducated you would already be a pathetic loser right? Don't be repetitious pal.

Let me know how ya really feel about me next time, don't hold back..

You must not be paying attention
That is what myself and most others say about you all the time
Now we can add illiterate to the list
Congrats

[JIBBBY]

You must not be paying attention
That is what myself and most others say about you all the time
Now we can add illiterate to the list
Congrats

Thanks.. You're so cool man, when I grow up I wanna be just like you..


Let's it keep it real though, you're a nobody on this forum, I've never heard of you before or remember reading a single post of yours in the past. You don't even have an Avatar picture up you're so lazy. You're like a fart in the wind on this forum, you stink for a split second and then are gone.

Go troll someone else, I can't possibly be rattled. No one wants to read your worthless opinion posts either.. I just read a post of yours on the Westbrook thread.. Mindless garbage..

[maggiethebestdog]

Thanks.. You're so cool man, when I grow up I wanna be just like you..


Let's it keep it real though, you're a nobody on this forum, I've never heard of you before or remember reading a single post of yours in the past. You don't even have an Avatar picture up you're so lazy. You're like a fart in the wind on this forum, you stink for a split second and then are gone.

Go troll someone else, I can't possibly be rattled. No one wants to read your worthless opinion posts either.. I just read a post of yours on the Westbrook thread.. Mindless garbage..

Lol
This is Jibby not getting rattled

[JIBBBY]

Lol
This is Jibby not getting rattled

Not rattled at all.. Actually bored and waiting for the games to start in an hour... You're helping me pass the time.. Thanks!!

[Andy117]

^^ You guys are funny.. You guys weren't in my shoes, you don't know..

I never said I had clinical depression, I just said I had a taste of it for a full month for the first time in my life. I know what I experienced and it was not fun!!!

It was like not wanting to live, nothing to live for, no hope.. Just very hopeless dark thinking constantly. No way to stop it. That's the best way I can describe what I was feeling.

If that's not full blown depression I don't know what is? It was a living hell for me.. NO LIE!!!

You had a taste of depression and thought of death, some people never shake depression.



Ever.



Just think of how you'd feel if years after your first depressive episode it was happening again for the 20th time.

[JIBBBY]

You had a taste of depression and thought of death, some people never shake depression.



Ever.



Just think of how you'd feel if years after your first depressive episode it was happening again for the 20th time.

Like I said if you experienced what I did and it never ends I can then understand someone jumping off a building or blowing their head off with a clean gun shot but only if you tried meds and everything else to combat it first...

Andy have you ever experienced RUDE depression over long periods of time? Can you personally speak from experience?

I'm not talking about the depression from losing loved ones or loving wife and or girl friend either, I'm talking about the deepest and darkest depression.. Even if you have loved ones, money, God and a beautiful home and are healthy with no real stress but you are still in that abyss of darkness and depression and can't crawl out of it. That's what I'm talking about..

I kid you not that's what I was dealing with for a solid month.. No one can understand what I felt and went thru.. I would have been happy to end it all trust me, I just wouldn't go there. I didn't no for sure also if I'd get better either I just tried to believe and keep it positive.. That was my battle with deep DEPRESSION and no one can tell me different.. Been there done that from a massive head hit that rocked my brain and absolutely changed my personality and normal happy thoughts. A month laying in bed is along time with the blinds drawn on a sunny day and the phone and computer shut off.. Trust me.. I was like just LEAVE ME ALONE!!!!

It was so foreign to me.. I prayed and prayed.. I tried to keep it positive as best I could.. Finally I started to come around again. I left the house, turned on my phone, went on a light jog as was terribly out of shape at that point.. The life came back into me and slowly I got back to my normal self..

That's my story and that's what I went through, that's being as honest as I can be...

[Andy117]

Like I said if you experienced what I did and it never ends I can then understand someone jumping off a building or blowing their head off with a clean gun shot but only if you tried meds and everything else to combat it first...

Andy have you ever experienced RUDE depression over long periods of time? Can you personally speak from experience?

I'm not talking about the depression from losing loved ones or loving wife and or girl friend either, I'm talking about the deepest and darkest depression.. Even if you have loved ones, money, God and a beautiful home and are healthy with no real stress but you are still in that abyss of darkness and depression and can't crawl out of it. That's what I'm talking about..

I kid you not that's what I was dealing with for a solid month.. No one can understand what I felt and went thru.. I would have been happy to end it all trust me, I just wouldn't go there. I didn't no for sure also if I'd get better either I just tried to believe and keep it positive.. That was my battle with deep DEPRESSION and no one can tell me different.. Been there done that from a massive head hit that rocked my brain and absolutely changed my personality and normal happy thoughts. A month laying in bed is along time with the blinds drawn on a sunny day and the phone and computer shut off.. Trust me.. I was like just LEAVE ME ALONE!!!!

It was so foreign to me.. I prayed and prayed.. I tried to keep it positive as best I could.. Finally I started to come around again. I left the house, turned on my phone, went on a light jog as was terribly out of shape at that point.. The life came back into me and slowly I got back to my normal self..

That's my story and that's what I went through, that's being as honest as I can be...

Read post 3 of this thread and get back to me.

[Dutch]

This mutherfucker in here talking about being depressed for a month.

Lol. What a complete sack of shiit.

[Cuse0323]

This mutherfucker in here talking about being depressed for a month.

Lol. What a complete sack of shiit.

Shit is pretty funny. I basically laid in bed and didn’t brush my teeth or shower all of ‘16 and ‘17. Tried to drink myself to death and was pulling it off too. I don’t think I felt any special depression that others haven’t experienced, but shit is definitely not much fun.

[PittsburghPlayer]

...

and I wonder

does she have any older sisters

a Mother that is divorced

I`ve a bone to be buried also



should bump this shit

[PittsburghPlayer]

devil made me do it

just made this shit up

and I wonder

does she have any older sisters

a Mother that is divorced

I`ve a bone to be buried also



should bump this shit

[cincinnatikid513]

love this song