Study - 173 hits on 100 beautiful women in the month of March

Auto Donk · 03-09-17, 11:49 AM

if you get even a small whiff of something like this eminating from her crotchal region, run as fast as you can away from her.....

stevek173 · 03-09-17, 12:00 PM

Very good advice fellas.

If I hear a dying chirping noise now I will be able to identify it and duely noted biter, all encounters as case specific.

Auto Donk · 03-09-17, 12:03 PM

Originally posted by stevek173

Very good advice fellas.

If I hear a dying chirping noise now I will be able to identify it and duely noted biter, all encounters as case specific.

if it's still chirping just prior to dying, go ahead and let her sit on your face....

it takes a full three days post-mortem for a robin to get as stinky as say, Kim or Klhoe Kardashi-hos' rancid bbc-dead-sperm-laden boxes......

BiTeMe UsAdOj · 03-09-17, 12:04 PM

Originally posted by Auto Donk

.... Kim Kardashian had gynecologic problems. Sharp-eyed viewers of Kim’s sex tape noted her vagina was as dry as the Sahara desert.

Shhhhit... I was drunk and not even sharp-eyed when I saw it, and even I noticed the 2 jackals & wildebeest running around in there. I shut the vid down before the camel showed up.... SHARP PLAY on my part.

Auto Donk · 03-09-17, 12:06 PM

I noticed that homeboy never got his face near that smelly cooch either..... and, I could actually see the paint peeling from the f'n walls behind her.....

stevek173 · 03-09-17, 12:12 PM

Donker what happens if you get pegged by a robin box girl?

Asking for a friend.

Auto Donk · 03-09-17, 12:54 PM

as long as your face is upwind, i don't see a problem.....

or, more accurately, SMELL a problem......

besides, all the jungle juice poppers you're huffin' to make you really want her to fuk your as hard as she can should block the smell, regardless......

whoops.... I meant "your friend"..... your friend's huffin the jungle juice should block the smell.....

Auto Donk · 03-09-17, 12:57 PM

also, the leather strap-on harness generally staps on through her legs, covering her nasty box, as well......

that should also cut down on the stench that will ultimately fill the room if the session goes on for more than 20 minutes.....

BiTeMe UsAdOj · 03-09-17, 01:09 PM

Originally posted by Auto Donk

whoops.... I meant "your friend"..... your friend's huffin the jungle juice should block the smell.....

steve has no friends, so, you know..... 1 + 0 = stevey

steve enjoys a good pegging bout as much as tt enjoys your ass, Donk

packerd_00 · 03-09-17, 01:45 PM

Those chicks in the first vid sounded high maintenance,did you chat them up off camera.

stevek173 · 03-09-17, 02:01 PM

Hey, I have friends!

I beat one in horse just this morning mind you.

Packerd I didn't but I should have. I was on my way to the Y and making a vid for you guys.

No excuse though. They were clearly jolly.

Auto Donk · 03-09-17, 02:35 PM

they were obviously reminiscing about that weekend they spent down in DonkLand..... still experiencing the oft-documented high women get after a weekend down here....

stevek173 · 03-09-17, 03:45 PM

I saw it as them having an intellectually stimulating conversation about how sexy I am,but hey who's to say

Auto Donk · 03-09-17, 04:18 PM

Originally posted by stevek173

I saw it as them having an intellectually stimulating conversation about how sexy I am,but hey who's to say

now that we've identified the problem, let's see if we can solve it......

Auto Donk · 03-09-17, 05:10 PM

or divert attention from the problem by letting the babes go for a ride in my car......

Bandit · 03-09-17, 05:21 PM

wow

looks like zero undies. Imagine if she has robin's box. That vehicle will smell forever

stevek173 · 03-09-17, 05:52 PM

Donker I do appreciate your advice but let's keep the robin box talk in your thread.

This is a nice thread, let's keep it that way.

Auto Donk · 03-09-17, 05:58 PM

this is a much nicer topic:

hey!!! don't blame me for robin box..... (unless you happen across some skank who hasn't practiced good hygiene about a week after I shot about a quart of hate paste into her, and it's stil there as you start to go down on her).....

generally, tho, I cannot control where stinky vag might show up at any given time and place.....

but, I will respect your request, and there'll be no more of this type sentiment in it...... (unless 1 of your 100 happens to have RB and your report on it):

stevek173 · 03-09-17, 06:08 PM

Np at all.

Donker, I tried to talk to a couple of girls more in Biter' s range, thought maybe Id hook him up. Will post vid tomorrow.

BiTeMe UsAdOj · 03-09-17, 06:51 PM

Originally posted by Auto Donk

generally, tho, I cannot control where stinky vag might show up at any given time and place..

No one can, unfortunately.

Hell, it even befuddled Einstein... who desperately wanted to mathematically predict WHERE & WHEN it would show up on the space/time continuum (Einstein was a perv and had a lot of time to kill in that fukkin Patent Office).

He got this far: RB = DS(*2)~V... where RB = well, you know... DS = dead sperm and V = vag

Funny thing is, Einstein's original calculations included BBC in the equation, but historians suspect Hitler ordered that fact purged from all found original notations (circa WW2).

Originally posted by stevek173

Donker, I tried to talk to a couple of girls more in Biter' s range, thought maybe Id hook him up. Will post vid tomorrow.

... stevay, strippers LOVE ME, for realz... just sayin.

So... they better be of stripper quality, or else I call bullshit on the hookup attempt. And I'm talking Rhino quality, pal... not like the strip joint Worm was at in fukkin ROUNDERS.

Capisce????

P.S.:
BTW, I know you have friends; just like @ the poker tables, I TRAPPED YOU.

I knew if I said that, you'd deny not having friends, while simultaneously *confirming* you liked being PEGGED by *not denying that*... get it?

I'm always thinking, pal.

As usual.... you been PWNED.

stevek173 · 03-10-17, 10:55 AM

Originally posted by BiTeMe UsAdOj

No one can, unfortunately.

Hell, it even befuddled Einstein... who desperately wanted to mathematically predict WHERE & WHEN it would show up on the space/time continuum (Einstein was a perv and had a lot of time to kill in that fukkin Patent Office).

He got this far: RB = DS(*2)~V... where RB = well, you know... DS = dead sperm and V = vag

Funny thing is, Einstein's original calculations included BBC in the equation, but historians suspect Hitler ordered that fact purged from all found original notations (circa WW2).

... stevay, strippers LOVE ME, for realz... just sayin.

So... they better be of stripper quality, or else I call bullshit on the hookup attempt. And I'm talking Rhino quality, pal... not like the strip joint Worm was at in fukkin ROUNDERS.

Capisce????

P.S.:
BTW, I know you have friends; just like @ the poker tables, I TRAPPED YOU.

I knew if I said that, you'd deny not having friends, while simultaneously *confirming* you liked being PEGGED by *not denying that*... get it?

I'm always thinking, pal.

As usual.... you been PWNED.

I hear you bro and even though you sometimes feel the need to play silly Mean Girls games with me

You don't see me playing them back at you because I am and always will be on a higher level than you in every way.

Back to the theme of the thread, there was one brief encounter with an absolute ten. She had her adorable little dog out for a bit. Here's the play by play.

Me: That's quite the intimidating killer you have there
Her: I know, he's so vicious
Me (showing trembling hands): I know, I'm so scared right now
Her: Giggle

I was in hyper intellectual FBI tell mode and read to much into her looking down at the dog when giggling so I didn't stop to speak to her, plus the whole thing was unexpected and in my mind I used my being in a rush to work to not proceed to speak to her more. This is fail. Still, we got positive feedback from a ten.

Now, anyone who really know me here knows I am always looking out for my friends. I met the two in the below video and immediately said to myself "I will speak to them in hopes of passing them off to poster Biteme Usadoj". The reason is this. Even though I am good looking, athletic, and incredibly charming you won't see me trying to take Milah Kunis from Ashton Kutcher, Lily Aldridge from Caleb Followill, Megan Keffer from Jeff Carter or even Jennifer Garner from Ben Affleck because I know that even though I am easily an 8 on a good day those guys are tens and they are backed with massive bankrolls which I am not. So, I keep it in my ballpark. These two I saw as not in my ballpark but easily in Biter's so I said hello to them and we exchanged pleasantries. Unfortunately they weren't in a good mood and got nasty with me, so my Lithuanian pride kicked in and I had to get snippy with them in return. The whole thing got a little out of control but the point is brother Biter - I clearly tried for you, and I would hope you would do the same in return.

Auto Donk · 03-10-17, 11:31 AM

due to all those little dogs wanting to attack you, and yapping their displeasure at your presence and their frustration of not being able to get to your legs to gnaw on them, I had to listen to the damn video ten times to finally make out that you were saying "no opposable thumbs".....

are u taunting those dogs, or biter, for not having opposable thumbs?

a car jack, two huge cans of trash, a random igloo with wheels, a small recycling bin full of shit.... and some pissed off dogs....

who the hell's drive way is that?

stevek173 · 03-10-17, 11:35 AM

No clue man.

I initially thought either of the dogs could make a good date for Biter so I didn't start out taunting. They got nasty with me so I had to remind them that at no point could they do anything to me because without thumbs they could not climb the fence to pursue me.
Whoever it is they sure are messy and sure have annoying dogs.

Nice bike though.

Auto Donk · 03-10-17, 01:43 PM

holy shit, stevie.....

your rack rivals hers:

couple quick questions....

1. can you shake em like she can?

(if so, make a video and post it and I'll give you 100 pts as soon as I have them)

2. do wear that garb when getting pegged?

(if so, make a video and post it and I'll give you 500 pts as soon as I have them)

3. are you officially coming out to the forum as bi or tranny?

(if so, make a video and post it and I'll give you 5 pts right now)

stevek173 · 03-10-17, 03:26 PM

Unfortunately that is not me Donker.

Answers to your questions:

1) No. I have a somewhat muscular chest with very little flab.

2) No.

3) No. I am 100% hetero, to the dismay of many.

Great .gif! I want to motorboat that right now.

stevek173 · 03-13-17, 09:37 AM

I found what appeared to be an oasis of only women, some in the shower, some half dressed - all of whom staring at me when I walked in. I knew it was likely because of the love ballads I've been playing in public, in some areas I'm basically John Lennon in his prime walking around.

Not sure why I was asked in very abrupt fashion to leave by security, but still seems like a cool place.

Auto Donk · 03-13-17, 09:45 AM

once again, we see an example here of a criminal ignorantly posting the evidence of his crime on line, for prosecutors to pluck off the web and place into their files......

let me know the severity of the charges leveled against you, Stevie, and i'll start negotiating a plea deal....

your priors might make it hard to keep you out of the hoosegow, this time around.....

stevek173 · 03-13-17, 10:01 AM

Still not sure what I did wrong, but ok.

Maybe if I go back there and play them a love ballad in the shower that'll make things more amicable.

Auto Donk · 03-13-17, 10:06 AM

therein lies the heart of your defense..... Legal Team Donk will build your defense by first takin' your avatar, coupling that with the video of you entering the woman's lockerroom, and submit to the state that you're a tranny, simply choosing the lockerroom that you feel most comfortable in to match your chosen gender identity......

throw in a couple of your homemade pegging videos, and.....

CASE DISMISSED!!!!!

stevek173 · 03-13-17, 10:19 AM

I'm in.

Do you do payment plans?

IlluminatedOne · 03-13-17, 11:30 AM

Holy fook.

IlluminatedOne · 03-13-17, 11:31 AM

Steveo you really cant be serious with this thread??

Auto Donk · 03-13-17, 11:39 AM

Unfortunately for Stevie, he looked down at his calendar, and saw march 13, and noticed he had not even reached "one" legitimate come on directed at a babe.....

similar to a rookie diver taking her first ocean dive on the Great Barrier reef, he naturally panicked, and decided to rush a local women's locker room in a nearby gym, hoping to "pad his stats".....

unfortunately, he wound up similar to said female rookie diver, finding himself in the equivalent position of near death on the ocean floor......

IlluminatedOne · 03-13-17, 11:49 AM

Seeing Steveo here crashing and burning reminded me of that movie Weird Science were IIan Mitchel-Smith's brother Chet (Bill Paxon) recalling him and Anthony Michael Hall couldnt get laid in a morgue.

IlluminatedOne · 03-13-17, 11:58 AM