Serious drug question, opiates
So in high school I got a football injury. This was in 2000 so the big crackdown on oxy's hadn't happened yet. I was prescribed to 80's a day the old school ones green monsters. Didn't know shit back then I was 17. I took them for a while they gave me perc's for a bit to get me off. I didn't know what "dope sick" was at the time, so at the end I just thought I had one hell of a flu. So I dabbled here and there throughout the years, a couple years ago I got hurt at work ( I do tree work) I got caught in the rope did some serious damage. Anyways they gave me perc 30's 2 a day for a long time. Then when I wanted to get off of them the doctor set me up with a methadone clinic. I just listened to the doctor, worst move of my life.
I was up at about 125mgs for a while, was coming down because I was sick of feeling all fuked up all day. I was going down 5mgs a week. Ok so I had a court case pending a serious one. Everything was looking good witnesses weren't showing up about a week before the trial they start offering me deals like 4 years, then 2 years. I asked my lawyer what the fuk is going on and from what she could tell one of the witnesses was going to testify. So last week went of the rails a bit spent tons of money drinking and partying all night on the chance that I would be gone for a while. Rewind a couple months ago when I had that incident where I was drunk blocking the cameraman. The head nurse at the clinic saw the video and they put me on breathalyzers with a zero tolerance policy, I couldn't even blow a .08 which is the legal limit to drive in Mass. You have to blow a 0.0. If you fail a test then you don't get your dose that day that have a talk with you about the dangers of mixing the two blah blah blah.
During last week I failed two of the tests within 2 days of each other. When you fail one you are not supposed to drive out even if you are legal to drive they call the cops. The first one I failed I didn't have anyone with me so I just ran out and asked my buddy to block the guards at the door. Was on the highway quick, cops came to my house but no biggie I was already inside nothing they could do. Next day go in have to sit with the administration and they were more pissed about me running then the test or that's the impression I got. I had to sign some paperwork saying that if it happened again I wouldn't run. No problem there. The next day which would be last Friday I failed another one. I didn't get my dose had a friend drive my truck up the road and went to work.
So there is two different ways of getting kicked off the place. First one administrative detox they bring you down 5mgs a day until you are at zero. Second one administrative emergency discharge they just straight up don't let you come back end of story so whatever **'s you are at 70 for me you just don't get anymore. Of course no one shows up for the trial and I get all charges dismissed so no jail Im off completely. I don't know how many people here have had any dealing with methadone or opiate detox. I have been able to handle every other withdrawel I have ever had to go through, couple days feel like crap end of story. I have never ever felt anything like this in my life though coming of the methadone. I seriously am losing it. Have not eaten, slept, thought about cutting off my legs cause of restless legs syndrome. This is also supposed to last a month or up to 3 months!!! How the fuk is this even legal for them to just kick me off at 70 cold turkey? I bought 500 perc's, xanex, clonidine and it doesn't matter the most I can feel better for is about 2 hours. Its not going to matter soon because I have spent a ton of money doing all this and I still have to work in this condition. I really don't know if I will be able to handle it much longer.
Has anyone ever had to deal with anything like this? I am in the process of getting a suboxone doctor but that's not easy either. Anyone have suggestions( other than don't take methadone again... no shit)? I would advise no one to ever get on methadone unless you are going to be on it for life and never fuk it up. I still have to pay bills and hold my life together and I am just about out of my expendable money. Anyone that knows anything that will help please let me know I cant do this agony anymore. I just cant.
I was up at about 125mgs for a while, was coming down because I was sick of feeling all fuked up all day. I was going down 5mgs a week. Ok so I had a court case pending a serious one. Everything was looking good witnesses weren't showing up about a week before the trial they start offering me deals like 4 years, then 2 years. I asked my lawyer what the fuk is going on and from what she could tell one of the witnesses was going to testify. So last week went of the rails a bit spent tons of money drinking and partying all night on the chance that I would be gone for a while. Rewind a couple months ago when I had that incident where I was drunk blocking the cameraman. The head nurse at the clinic saw the video and they put me on breathalyzers with a zero tolerance policy, I couldn't even blow a .08 which is the legal limit to drive in Mass. You have to blow a 0.0. If you fail a test then you don't get your dose that day that have a talk with you about the dangers of mixing the two blah blah blah.
During last week I failed two of the tests within 2 days of each other. When you fail one you are not supposed to drive out even if you are legal to drive they call the cops. The first one I failed I didn't have anyone with me so I just ran out and asked my buddy to block the guards at the door. Was on the highway quick, cops came to my house but no biggie I was already inside nothing they could do. Next day go in have to sit with the administration and they were more pissed about me running then the test or that's the impression I got. I had to sign some paperwork saying that if it happened again I wouldn't run. No problem there. The next day which would be last Friday I failed another one. I didn't get my dose had a friend drive my truck up the road and went to work.
So there is two different ways of getting kicked off the place. First one administrative detox they bring you down 5mgs a day until you are at zero. Second one administrative emergency discharge they just straight up don't let you come back end of story so whatever **'s you are at 70 for me you just don't get anymore. Of course no one shows up for the trial and I get all charges dismissed so no jail Im off completely. I don't know how many people here have had any dealing with methadone or opiate detox. I have been able to handle every other withdrawel I have ever had to go through, couple days feel like crap end of story. I have never ever felt anything like this in my life though coming of the methadone. I seriously am losing it. Have not eaten, slept, thought about cutting off my legs cause of restless legs syndrome. This is also supposed to last a month or up to 3 months!!! How the fuk is this even legal for them to just kick me off at 70 cold turkey? I bought 500 perc's, xanex, clonidine and it doesn't matter the most I can feel better for is about 2 hours. Its not going to matter soon because I have spent a ton of money doing all this and I still have to work in this condition. I really don't know if I will be able to handle it much longer.
Has anyone ever had to deal with anything like this? I am in the process of getting a suboxone doctor but that's not easy either. Anyone have suggestions( other than don't take methadone again... no shit)? I would advise no one to ever get on methadone unless you are going to be on it for life and never fuk it up. I still have to pay bills and hold my life together and I am just about out of my expendable money. Anyone that knows anything that will help please let me know I cant do this agony anymore. I just cant.
