(is it a federal offense if i beat up my mailman)

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  • BEANTOWNJIM
    SBR MVP
    • 08-12-05
    • 4610

    #1
    (is it a federal offense if i beat up my mailman)
    THIS IS A SERIOUS QUESTION I AM GETTING PRETTY PISSED OFF WITH MY MAILMAN FOR THE LAST MONTH OR SO HE HAS BEEN TREATING ME LIKE SHIT AND NOT DELIVERING MY MAIL.LAST WEEK IT RAINED LIKE A BASTARD SO HE USED TO CLOSE MY BOX SO THE MAIL WOULDNT GET WET WELL I CAME HOME AND THE MAIL WAS DRIPPING WET I COULDNT EVEN READ IT AND I HAD TO GET A PUMP TO DRAIN THE MAIL BOX I ALSO GOT 2 LATE NOTICES 50 DOLLARS EACH BECAUSE MY *********** BILL WASNT DELIVERED I THINK THIS MAILMAN IS BULLSHIT AT ME BECAUSE I DIDNT TIP HIM AT CHRISTMAS TIME.I USED TO TIP THE OLD MAILMAN 50 DOLLARS BUT THIS GUY I DONT REALLY KNOW AND I CAN TELL HE IS A COCKY BASTARD.HE WALKS AROUND WITH HIS SHORT SHORTS THE GUY IS AROUND 6 FT 4 BIG GUY BUT THE penetrating GUY THINKS HE IS DEAN MARTIN I FEEL LIKE SAYING HE DIP SHIT YOUR A MAILMAN NOT A MOVIE STAR HE WALKS AROUND TALKING TO ALL THE WOMEN AND PUSHING HIS HAIR BACK AND HE IS ALWAYS WEARING EXPENSIVE SUN GLASSES.MY LOVELY WIFE HAS NICKNAMED HIM (LEGS) BECAUSE HE IS ALWAYS SHOWING THEM OFF WITH HIS HIGH SHORTS ON.I FEEL LIKE SAYING HEY LISTEN YOUR A MAIL MAN NOT FRANK SINATRA NOW JUST DELIVER THE MAIL AND STOP FLIRTING WITH OUR WOMEN

    I CANT AFFORD ANY MORE LATE CHARGES ITS GOING TO AFFECT MY CREDIT RATING I KNOW LEGS IS STEALING MY MAIL AND JUST THROWING IT IN THE TRASH TO BUST MY BALLS I HAVE A GOOD CREDIT RATING AND IF I KEEP GETTING THESE LATE CHARGES ITS GOING TO LOOK LIKE I DONT PAY MY BILLS

    SO BOYS IS IT A FEDERAL OFFENSE IF I BEAT UP LEGS I MIGHT HAVE TO SUCKER PUNCH HIM TO BE HONEST WITH YOU HE DOES LOOK KIND OF RUGGED AND I AM NOT TOTALLY CONFIDENT I CAN TAKE HIM.I WAS THINKING OF SETTING UP A BOOBY TRAP MAYBE LOOSENING A STEP SO HE TAKES A HEADER I JUST WANT THIS GUY TO STOP F UCKING WITH MY MAIL.IF I EVER CATCH HIM OUT OF UNIFORM I WILL KICK HIM IN THE BALLS I JUST DONT KNOW IF ITS O.K. TO SLUG A MAILMAN AND NOT BE CHARGED WITH A FEDERAL HATE CRIME

    NO MAIL TODAY IN MY BOX PLUS I AM EXPECTING A GOLF CLUB DELIVERED BY THE U.S. POST OFFICE WHO KNOWS WHEN LEGS WILL DELIVER IT I GUESS WHEN EVER HE FEELS LIKE IT.I HAVENT HAD MAIL NOW FOR 3 DAYS
  • Chi_archie
    SBR Aristocracy
    • 07-22-08
    • 63172

    #2
    Yes it is
    Comment
    • thetrinity
      SBR Posting Legend
      • 01-25-11
      • 22430

      #3
      sounds like its worth the risk
      Comment
      • El Nino
        SBR Posting Legend
        • 05-03-12
        • 18426

        #4
        Yes, now run along back across the street.
        Comment
        • ChalkyDog
          SBR Hall of Famer
          • 10-02-11
          • 9598

          #5
          Federal offenses are the best kind.

          Easier prison stints.

          Tell you right now, if I get hemmed up in Arizona I am fleeing for a week or so, get some marshall's after me, and then turn myself into the FBI.

          Club Fed > any other prison.
          Comment
          • BigDeem5
            SBR Posting Legend
            • 02-26-11
            • 17191

            #6
            BeantownJimmer, go PRO pal.

            Would love to see you at the poker tables.
            Comment
            • BEANTOWNJIM
              SBR MVP
              • 08-12-05
              • 4610

              #7
              THIS IS A JOKE I GUESS NEXT YEAR I WILL HAVE TO TIP HIM BUT LIKE I SAID THEY CHANGED GUYS MID YEAR I DIDNT EVEN GET TO KNOW LEGS AND NOW HE IS PLAYING GAMES.BOYS MAILMEN CAN HOLD A GRUDGE IT WAS LIKE ME WHEN I WAS A PAPERBOY I HAD THIS OLD GROUCH THAT USED TO COMPLAIN TO THE OFFICE BECAUSE I DIDNT PUT HIS NEWSPAPER UNDER HIS DOOR MAT WELL ONE NIGHT ME AND ANOTHER KID WENT BY LATE AT NIGHT AND I WHIPPED A ROCK RIGHT THROUGH HIS FRONT WINDOW I FELT GREAT AND NEVER GOT CAUGHT

              WHY ARE SOME MAIL MEN COCKY penetrates WHILE OTHERS HAVE A CHIP ON THERE SHOULDERS
              Comment
              • Booya711
                BARRELED IN @ SBR!
                • 12-20-11
                • 27329

                #8
                Cool new invention is the internet..you can pay all bills online, so a mailman doesnt even fukking matter...just my two cents...
                Comment
                • BEANTOWNJIM
                  SBR MVP
                  • 08-12-05
                  • 4610

                  #9
                  I HAVE ONLY HAD 2 BAD MAILMEN IN MY LIFE THIS NEW GUY LEGS WHO IS DUMPING OUT MY BILLS SO I CANT PAY THEM AND THIS OTHER ONE WAS A BLACK KID.THE BLACK KID WAS FUNNY HE USED TO SAY TO ME HEY BEANTOWN WHAT TIME DO YOU LIKE TO GET YOUR MAIL I USED TO SAY WELL I NEED IT BEFORE MY LOVELY WIFE GETS HOME SO CAN YOU GET IT HERE BEFORE NOONTIME.THEN I WOULD SEE THE LITTLE RBBER HEAD WALKING DOWN THE STREET RIGHT AS MY LOVELY WIFE WAS WALKING IN THE DOOR AND HANDING HER THE MAIL AND WAVING TO ME MAN I HATED THAT KID THAT IS THE ONLY PROBLEMS I HAVE EVER HAD WITH MAIL MEN MOST ARE GOOD GUYS

                  BOYS DONT EVER GET TO FRIENDLY WITH YOUR MAIL MEN THEY WILL DEFINITLY HIT YOU UP FOR A CHRISTMAS TIP AND SIT AROUND MAKING SMALL TALK BECAUSE THEY HAVE SO MUCH TIME TO KILL ON THERE ROUTES.I DONT HAVE TIME TO BE TALKING TO THE MAILMEN I AM TO BUSY STUDYING THE GAMES
                  Comment
                  • TheCentaur
                    SBR Hall of Famer
                    • 06-28-11
                    • 8108

                    #10
                    I don't think it would be a federal offense the postal service is the private sector now I thought. Would just be assault

                    Also, this bs is why tipping needs to be done away with. It used to be to reward good service, but now so often it is a shakedown by people who should just be doing their job right. It isn't good service to get ur mail delivered it's his damn job

                    I've also noticed that now in many places a tip cannot be added to a CC receipt in a restaurant. I'm thinking it's because so many waitstaff have changed the tip amount and the CC companies have been dealing with a lot of disputes.
                    Comment
                    • BEANTOWNJIM
                      SBR MVP
                      • 08-12-05
                      • 4610

                      #11
                      HEY THIS IS THE 2ND TIME TODAY I GOT SALOONED WHO IS DOING THIS IF I HAVE TO I WILL CALL SBR JOHN AND HAVE THIS MODERATOR WORKING IN THE SBR CAFETERIA NOT THE FORUM.

                      I WANT THIS THREAD RETURNED TO THE FRONT PAGE NOW
                      Comment
                      • bigboydan
                        SBR Aristocracy
                        • 08-10-05
                        • 55420

                        #12
                        What's the problem this time Claude... Maybe you should ask your alter ego PatrickMcIrish :
                        Comment
                        • zizoudane10
                          SBR Hall of Famer
                          • 03-27-12
                          • 7272

                          #13
                          Originally posted by bigboydan
                          What's the problem this time Claude... Maybe you should ask your alter ego PatrickMcIrish :
                          Comment
                          • bigboydan
                            SBR Aristocracy
                            • 08-10-05
                            • 55420

                            #14
                            Originally posted by zizoudane10
                            I told ya I was correct !

                            When BBD talks everyonebody better listen "E.F" !!

                            Comment
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