Fidels, read this next time you smoke up.
Skip it for now... you gotta be in the "zone".
Skip it for now... you gotta be in the "zone".
"So uh... what do you do for a living?"
"What do I do?" The woman on the barstool next to me cocked an eyebrow. "
You've been staring across the bar at me all night." She said.
"You've bought me two drinks, I've seen you look at my cleavage no less than three times, and you want to know what I do for a living?"
"Uhh..."
"You want to penetrate me." She said.
I wasn't really sure what to say, but I wish I'd at least remembered to close my mouth.
"Does it really matter what I do?" She went on. "Would you not want to penetrate me if I were an evolutionary biologist or something?"
"No, I-"
"Good, then let's get out of here and go sexually torture each other."
"Uh, did you say--oof!"
She grabbed my hand and practically yanked me off the bar stool, dragging me out the door to a black BMW sedan.
"Oh by the way," she said once we'd gotten seated, "you're not a murderer, right?"
"I- what? Why?" I said flabbergasted. "Do I look like a murderer?"
"No, but neither did Ted Bundy, Jeffrey Dahmer or Richard Ramirez."
"Well-"
"Gacy and Manson did though, so I'd say the odds are about fifty-fifty. I know Krav Maga, just so you know."
She didn't wait for my response, she just threw the car into gear and stomped the gas pedal like she was angry with it.
When we got to her place the clothes flew off so fast I would've thought she had at least eight hands, and it wasn't two minutes before she was naked and lowering herself down onto my lap.
"Ahh-" she gasped as she slipped it in, rocking her hips gently back and forth. The way her body moved was unlike anything I'd ever seen before, the rhythmic, fluid contortions like pure sexuality given form.
My face grew hot and my mind heavy, and soon I could not remember who this woman was, who I was, or where we were. There was nothing but the sensual twisting of her body as we neared orgasm in unison.
We reached the climax together, and the moans of pleasure turned into screams as we twisted our sweat-slicked bodies together.
After it was over I couldn't move. The whole world was a haze of pleasure and warm comfort--soft and silent.
And then my lover's face began to twist, stretching and bulging out like a rubber mask about to burst at the seams, and burst it did.
Out of the blood and torn shreds of face emerged a large insectoid head. I willed my muscles to move, but they would not cooperate; I realized with horror that she must have done something to me.
The insect's jaw unhinged, stretching wide over my head, its hot breath invading my nostrils as a ragged black tongue slid up my cheek. My head slid down the gullet, its throat squeezed me down like a fleshy vice grip. And then, as suddenly as it began I could feel my head sliding back out of the beast's maw, the putrid stink of its insides replaced by the cool, calm fragrance of fresh air.
"Huh." The insect said.
My heart raced as if trying to catch up with the thoughts in my head.
"This is usually the part where I would eat you-- but..."
My throat made an involuntary gurgling sound and I realized I'd regained the use of my voice.
"I uh... don't taste good?" I managed to squeak out.
What a stupid thing to say. I thought.
"No, it's not that." She said. "You just seem really sweet. I'm not sure that I want to eat you."
Her head morphed back into the beautiful woman I'd met at the bar, and my heart slowed down just a little.
"I don't think I will." She said, staring down at me from her mounted position on my lap with a slight smirk.
"Oh, that's uhh... really great." I gasped out.
The logical half of my brain was screaming at me to shove her off of my lap and run as fast as I could in the opposite direction. But the lonely, desperate half was telling me that there was a beautiful woman sitting naked on my lap, and what's more, she actually seemed to like me. And, that if I offended her, she might decide to eat me after all.
So I figured I'd better at least try to make conversation.
"So uh..." my voice sounded dusty and hoarse, "are you a m-monster?"
"What?" She seemed taken aback. "You think I'm a monster just because I eat people? Do you think cats are monsters because they eat mice, or people are monsters for eating chickens?"'
"Uhh..."
"Of course you don't." She said. "Although, the chickens probably think of you as monsters. Then again, chickens are assholes. Who cares what they think?"
"Oh...okay?"
The room fell silent as we stared at each other for a moment.'
"So-"
"You were about to ask me if I wanted to penetrate again, right?" She cut me off.
"Um, yeah."
She grinned devilishly and my mind once again melted away in the rhythmic contortions of her body. My last thought before consciousness gave way to pure pleasure was that I was lucky she'd interrupted me before I asked what she did for a living again.
"What do I do?" The woman on the barstool next to me cocked an eyebrow. "
You've been staring across the bar at me all night." She said.
"You've bought me two drinks, I've seen you look at my cleavage no less than three times, and you want to know what I do for a living?"
"Uhh..."
"You want to penetrate me." She said.
I wasn't really sure what to say, but I wish I'd at least remembered to close my mouth.
"Does it really matter what I do?" She went on. "Would you not want to penetrate me if I were an evolutionary biologist or something?"
"No, I-"
"Good, then let's get out of here and go sexually torture each other."
"Uh, did you say--oof!"
She grabbed my hand and practically yanked me off the bar stool, dragging me out the door to a black BMW sedan.
"Oh by the way," she said once we'd gotten seated, "you're not a murderer, right?"
"I- what? Why?" I said flabbergasted. "Do I look like a murderer?"
"No, but neither did Ted Bundy, Jeffrey Dahmer or Richard Ramirez."
"Well-"
"Gacy and Manson did though, so I'd say the odds are about fifty-fifty. I know Krav Maga, just so you know."
She didn't wait for my response, she just threw the car into gear and stomped the gas pedal like she was angry with it.
When we got to her place the clothes flew off so fast I would've thought she had at least eight hands, and it wasn't two minutes before she was naked and lowering herself down onto my lap.
"Ahh-" she gasped as she slipped it in, rocking her hips gently back and forth. The way her body moved was unlike anything I'd ever seen before, the rhythmic, fluid contortions like pure sexuality given form.
My face grew hot and my mind heavy, and soon I could not remember who this woman was, who I was, or where we were. There was nothing but the sensual twisting of her body as we neared orgasm in unison.
We reached the climax together, and the moans of pleasure turned into screams as we twisted our sweat-slicked bodies together.
After it was over I couldn't move. The whole world was a haze of pleasure and warm comfort--soft and silent.
And then my lover's face began to twist, stretching and bulging out like a rubber mask about to burst at the seams, and burst it did.
Out of the blood and torn shreds of face emerged a large insectoid head. I willed my muscles to move, but they would not cooperate; I realized with horror that she must have done something to me.
The insect's jaw unhinged, stretching wide over my head, its hot breath invading my nostrils as a ragged black tongue slid up my cheek. My head slid down the gullet, its throat squeezed me down like a fleshy vice grip. And then, as suddenly as it began I could feel my head sliding back out of the beast's maw, the putrid stink of its insides replaced by the cool, calm fragrance of fresh air.
"Huh." The insect said.
My heart raced as if trying to catch up with the thoughts in my head.
"This is usually the part where I would eat you-- but..."
My throat made an involuntary gurgling sound and I realized I'd regained the use of my voice.
"I uh... don't taste good?" I managed to squeak out.
What a stupid thing to say. I thought.
"No, it's not that." She said. "You just seem really sweet. I'm not sure that I want to eat you."
Her head morphed back into the beautiful woman I'd met at the bar, and my heart slowed down just a little.
"I don't think I will." She said, staring down at me from her mounted position on my lap with a slight smirk.
"Oh, that's uhh... really great." I gasped out.
The logical half of my brain was screaming at me to shove her off of my lap and run as fast as I could in the opposite direction. But the lonely, desperate half was telling me that there was a beautiful woman sitting naked on my lap, and what's more, she actually seemed to like me. And, that if I offended her, she might decide to eat me after all.
So I figured I'd better at least try to make conversation.
"So uh..." my voice sounded dusty and hoarse, "are you a m-monster?"
"What?" She seemed taken aback. "You think I'm a monster just because I eat people? Do you think cats are monsters because they eat mice, or people are monsters for eating chickens?"'
"Uhh..."
"Of course you don't." She said. "Although, the chickens probably think of you as monsters. Then again, chickens are assholes. Who cares what they think?"
"Oh...okay?"
The room fell silent as we stared at each other for a moment.'
"So-"
"You were about to ask me if I wanted to penetrate again, right?" She cut me off.
"Um, yeah."
She grinned devilishly and my mind once again melted away in the rhythmic contortions of her body. My last thought before consciousness gave way to pure pleasure was that I was lucky she'd interrupted me before I asked what she did for a living again.
....I also was very depressed this week to hear about Scowks!...
....Scowks was da' shit...him and I use to chill together all the time...drink some cold ones...talk about sports, politics, and pussy....scowks was the coolest hamster I've ever known...he will be sorely missed...my eyes are watering right now as I type this....too sad...can't think straight...gonna have to log off for a while and let the emotions out of me......
Scwoks!
...please don't spoil it for me...I won't log on here for at least another two hours!...
...Jason and Freddy both lived after beating the shit out of each other...very well choreographed fight scenes...about an even 50/50 split...I just wish the two main protagonists teens would have died like everyone else did...now I need to google if they did a part II or a sequel to this.
