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I will be Jim Shwartz. Will wear a polo shirt and walk around looking confused as hellComment -
I wonder what JJGold is dressing up as?Comment -
I'm gonna be a boxer.Comment -
i'm gonna be a oompa loompaComment -
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im going to be the giantComment -
Dirk Diggler
Custom made prosthesis due to arrive via Fed Ex middle of the monthComment -
Haven't decided yet on animal, vegetable or mineralComment -
I'm going to be a ghost this year, it's easy to makeComment -
Going boxer again seaweed. Every year just buy another piece of the costume.Comment -
I got some Halloween stories for ya.
High School. I guess around 15, 16 at the time.
The city of Philadelphia would take kids from the inner city (spooks) and fukkin bus them into our neighborhood to get treats.
Back then there was LOTS of racial tension. It was so thick you could have cut it with a knife. Every day you were walking on the edge.
So they bus these fukkin nigs in from the ghetto and we're standing on our corner watching these fukks. They get off the bus and start acting like animals that were just released from a fukkin cage. They're screaming and making all kinds of sounds. I wish I could describe it properly. Sounded like the sounds those fukkin tribes in Africa make. You know the ones you see on National Geographic and shit and all the tribe members have bones in their fukkin noses and huge holes in their lips and shit.
So we're watching these fukkin animals as they go from door to door for treats. They get to this one house where the old lady would sit on her steps and hand out candy she kept from a big bag.
One spook decides he's going to steal the bag from the old lady. He's doing this not a half a block from us where we're all watching them and there's at least 15 of us.
He grabs the bag out of the lady's hand and runs down the street towards us. What a bad move.
My buddy runs up and hits him with a right that drops him. Well now, as you can probably guess, it's on.
Next thing you know there's like 30 of us going at it in the fukkin street with these nigs. I'm fighting one spook and another jumps on my back and tries to choke me. I flipped him off and stomp a boot on his fukkin spook skull and he's out like a fukkin light.
Next thing you know one spook pulls out a knife and stabs my boy. That lit a fukkin trigger.
We start stomping the shit out of these fukks and next thing you know they're all running for their life back towards the bus. We chased them all the way back to the bus but the cops came before anything else happened.
My boy wound up going to the hospital but was ok. We joke about it now, looking back on it.
Another Halloween story I got for ya.
Around the same time, high school years. We had a lot of crazy friends.
We're standing on the corner drinking beer, hanging out. So all the kids are out trick or treating, everybody laughing, drinking and having fun.
Next thing you know, from about a half a block away, we see this dark figure slowly walking up the street. But he's acting really shady. So we're all like what the fukk is this? One of boys says get ready we might have to stomp the shit out of this asshole.
So this fukker is acting really shady. He keeps looking back and turning his head like somebody's following him. He's making eyes at the kids in a weird way. So I'm watching this and I'm like this is gonna be fun I get to stomp a mudhole in someone's ass on halloween. Again.
So as he's walking up, he sees us and stares and we can see he's staring at us but it's dark out and he's still in shadows on the other side of the street.
So as we're watching him he makes a move suddenly like he's ducking. Like someone shot at him. So now we're all like what the fukk? So I yell at him yo motherfukker come over here I got somethin for ya. Next thing my boys start talking to him and walking towards him. He doesn't stop walking towards us. I'm thinking this motherfukker has a death wish--and I like it.
He finally gets to a point in the street where we can see him under a street light. We're like..........
wtf
Dude's got fake glasses on with the fake eyes. Fake nose. Fake teeth.
Suddenly he stops in front of us and is like....yo any of you know where the fukkin hash is?
OMG now we all realize who it is and we're fukkin dying from laughter.
It's one of our boys who got dressed up to trick us.
Boys, I never laughed so hard in my fukkin life.
I was literally crying tears of laughter. I was bent over on the ground from laughing so hard. He got us so good.
We still talk about that as being the greatest Halloween gag in history.
Those were the days, boys.
Good times, good memories.
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Back of the Senator jersey make sure it say's Leafs suck
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