Thanks for the 2 nasty fuk'in poker hands sbr! Fuk this god damn shit hole site!

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  • str
    SBR Posting Legend
    • 01-12-09
    • 11522

    #36
    Classy post.
    Comment
    • Smoke
      SBR Aristocracy
      • 10-09-09
      • 48111

      #37
      Its only for points quit crying
      Comment
      • mikejamm
        SBR Posting Legend
        • 08-24-09
        • 11034

        #38
        Look guys, I don't expect to win all the time and believe me I'm well aware of the so called fuk'in "variance" in poker. However, lately all I get at this fuk'in shit hole poker client is the mother fuker of all bad beats! And it happens in just about every tourney or cash game I play in. If I'm hold'in KK, someone else has AA, if I am fortunate to get AA in the hole, someone will hit trips on me everytime! Even if I'm able to come away with something in the top 20, the rollover cards fuk me over there too. It's fuk'in frustrating as hell to see the same god damn bullshit all the time. Variance? Go shove it up your ass sbr!

        I know I complain about it a lot, but god damn it, the shit happens to me so fuk'in often, I feel like it's become some personal vendetta against me. I've put in the playing time and dedication playing here and still get fuk during tourneys and playoff style formats! I've struggle to try and get into the top 50 of every tournament we've played and even if I make it in the top 100, come playoff for the final 20 spots, I still end up with some shitty fuk'in bad beat.

        Meanwhile a lucky fuk like Bite, who hasn't even been here barely a full fuk'in year, cashes for $700 in the last poker championship and is currently in 2nd place leading up to the upcoming one! Nothing against him personally, but again, I hang out and watch the tables and see the type of hands certain players always seem to end up with here. Variance is word that does not exists at this shit hole site. Pretty sad, because I really enjoyed playing here early on, until all those "great" software updates changed the game here entirely, into the rigged fuk newbie loving shit fest it is today. And the charity tourneys were nice too, even though I was never "chosen" to fuk'in place in one of those either, let along even make it into finals of any championship, or world series, played here.

        So good luck fellas, can't help but wonder if I'd been a fat fuk power poster like tt or an sbr ass kissing republican video making douche bag like opie, I might have faired better, but it's not who the fuk I am, nor should I have to compromise for some asshole site which obviously knows nothing about "real" variance and fair programming in the game. My live play works well for me and that's what I'll be focused on from here on out. Unlike this fuk'in joke software here, which doesn't even qualify as real poker.
        Last edited by mikejamm; 11-16-12, 10:40 AM.
        Comment
        • DrStale
          SBR Hall of Famer
          • 12-07-08
          • 9692

          #39
          So what exactly is your theory? That SBR has one of the mods just hanging around the Poker tables switching out your cards when they see you sit down? That makes way more sense than variance.
          Originally posted by Dark Horse
          If with religion you mean belief system, your belief system is your religion. Again, it matters not what it is. You believe in it, you are loyal to it, would defend it, and yet have no proof of it, other than that, at one point or another, you chose to believe in it. Self-hypnosis. What if there were a snapping of fingers that broke the hypnosis?
          Comment
          • konck
            SBR Posting Legend
            • 10-17-06
            • 12554

            #40
            Mike I think you are the only one ever cheated or bad beat in poker.....I feel for you
            Comment
            • GOIRISH
              SBR MVP
              • 09-25-10
              • 2072

              #41
              Do you even read what you're posting? You post about the shit being rigged, but then go on to say you've been here for longer than someone else, so the cards should be more forgiving to you. Like i said earlier the system is shit, but you have to play to it. When in rome do as the Romans do.
              Comment
              • Kindred
                SBR MVP
                • 09-09-08
                • 2901

                #42
                Originally posted by mikejamm

                So good luck fellas, can't help but wonder if I'd been a fat fuk power poster like tt or an sbr ass kissing republican video making douche bag like opie, I might have faired better,
                Good stuff mike,made me lol but you're wrong about TT being a power poster, he's a power bottom
                Comment
                • opie1988
                  SBR Posting Legend
                  • 09-12-10
                  • 23429

                  #43
                  Mike-

                  I think I know the main issue with your bad luck at Poker.......

                  YOU SUCK!
                  Comment
                  • Powderguy
                    SBR Hall of Famer
                    • 09-18-09
                    • 6939

                    #44
                    you seem upset yeah?
                    Comment
                    • daneblazer
                      BARRELED IN @ SBR!
                      • 09-14-08
                      • 27861

                      #45
                      These two poker hands aren't as bad as the bad beat the economy took last week
                      Comment
                      • Sam Odom
                        SBR Aristocracy
                        • 10-30-05
                        • 58063

                        #46
                        Mikey is looking for a freebee , a hand-out , because life is not fair
                        Comment
                        • mikejamm
                          SBR Posting Legend
                          • 08-24-09
                          • 11034

                          #47
                          Originally posted by opie1988
                          Mike-

                          I think I know the main issue with your bad luck at Poker.......

                          YOU SUCK!
                          Nobody sucks at life as bad as you opie! You stupid fuk'in texans can't even have a parade for veterans without putting them on some railroad tracks and getting them killed! You must be so proud of your state, you dumb fuk'in hillbilly. "Come to texas where dumb fuks kill veterans and worship a fuk'in shitty losing football team." Fuk'in Mexicans got more brains than you boy.
                          Last edited by mikejamm; 11-16-12, 01:11 PM.
                          Comment
                          • hels
                            SBR Hall of Famer
                            • 04-12-09
                            • 8767

                            #48
                            Originally posted by mikejamm
                            Look guys, I don't expect to win all the time and believe me I'm well aware of the so called fuk'in "variance" in poker. However, lately all I get at this fuk'in shit hole poker client is the mother fuker of all bad beats! And it happens in just about every tourney or cash game I play in. If I'm hold'in KK, someone else has AA, if I am fortunate to get AA in the hole, someone will hit trips on me everytime! Even if I'm able to come away with something in the top 20, the rollover cards fuk me over there too. It's fuk'in frustrating as hell to see the same god damn bullshit all the time. Variance? Go shove it up your ass sbr!

                            I know I complain about it a lot, but god damn it, the shit happens to me so fuk'in often, I feel like it's become some personal vendetta against me. I've put in the playing time and dedication playing here and still get fuk during tourneys and playoff style formats! I've struggle to try and get into the top 50 of every tournament we've played and even if I make it in the top 100, come playoff for the final 20 spots, I still end up with some shitty fuk'in bad beat.

                            Meanwhile a lucky fuk like Bite, who hasn't even been here barely a full fuk'in year, cashes for $700 in the last poker championship and is currently in 2nd place leading up to the upcoming one! Nothing against him personally, but again, I hang out and watch the tables and see the type of hands certain players always seem to end up with here. Variance is word that does not exists at this shit hole site. Pretty sad, because I really enjoyed playing here early on, until all those "great" software updates changed the game here entirely, into the rigged fuk newbie loving shit fest it is today. And the charity tourneys were nice too, even though I was never "chosen" to fuk'in place in one of those either, let along even make it into finals of any championship, or world series, played here.

                            So good luck fellas, can't help but wonder if I'd been a fat fuk power poster like tt or an sbr ass kissing republican video making douche bag like opie, I might have faired better, but it's not who the fuk I am, nor should I have to compromise for some asshole site which obviously knows nothing about "real" variance and fair programming in the game. My live play works well for me and that's what I'll be focused on from here on out. Unlike this fuk'in joke software here, which doesn't even qualify as real poker.
                            As part of the SBR detective squad I did some research into this matter. I have some surprising results.

                            It seems you made one too many sexually explicit advances towards Jonalyn. SBR staff decided you had to be penalized for it.

                            SBR corporate paid a sum between $4000-$6000 to have a private software developer to formulate an anti-mikejamm program. Specifics of this program have been difficult to obtain. Thanks to Thegiant and greenhippo we have deduced that on any given hand at a 10 player table you will only win this hand 4% of the time. However, preflop you will have a 23% chance of winning and if all 10 players see the flop you will have a 28% chance to win the hand. Continuing, if all 10 players see the turn you will have a 32% of winning. Finally if all 10 players see the river you will have a 35% chance of winning but you will only win 4% of the time if all 10 players show their hands.

                            greenhippo, Thegiant and myself have spoken to SBR higher ups and they will strongly consider removing the anti-mikejamm program if you make a video apologizing about your poor behavior in the past and currently giving specifics about posting/chat habits that you will improve upon.

                            Regards, SBR Detective Squad
                            Comment
                            • mikejamm
                              SBR Posting Legend
                              • 08-24-09
                              • 11034

                              #49
                              Originally posted by Sam Odom
                              Mikey is looking for a freebee , a hand-out , because life is not fair
                              Don't need or want a free anything. I've already elected the right guy along with all the other intelligent Americans! Your guy got his ass handed to him, burns your republican ass doesn't it?
                              Comment
                              • Sam Odom
                                SBR Aristocracy
                                • 10-30-05
                                • 58063

                                #50
                                mikey , your poker posts define you and your mentality perfectly


                                .
                                Last edited by Sam Odom; 11-16-12, 12:59 PM.
                                Comment
                                • mikejamm
                                  SBR Posting Legend
                                  • 08-24-09
                                  • 11034

                                  #51
                                  Originally posted by DrStale
                                  So what exactly is your theory? That SBR has one of the mods just hanging around the Poker tables switching out your cards when they see you sit down? That makes way more sense than variance.
                                  You have to understand how programming works, if you're not computer literate, then you don't get it. It's a program, and you sign into it, it has your information and parameters as a player. And yes it can be manipulated to have a certain outcome against or for certain players. Which is exactly what happens here. Why do you think a newbie gets great cards during his first tourney? Or one fuk'in guy at your table will run hot and beat you at every fuk'in showdown? You call that variance? Come the fuk on, how fuk'in stupid do you have to be, to sit here and play night after night and watch how fuk'in redundant this shitty software is? A prime example is how the tourneys are "timed" to end the way they do. Someone has to program that software to operate like that! You think it just fuk'in magically ends up that way?
                                  Last edited by mikejamm; 11-16-12, 12:26 PM.
                                  Comment
                                  • mikejamm
                                    SBR Posting Legend
                                    • 08-24-09
                                    • 11034

                                    #52
                                    Originally posted by hels
                                    As part of the SBR detective squad I did some research into this matter. I have some surprising results.

                                    It seems you made one too many sexually explicit advances towards Jonalyn. SBR staff decided you had to be penalized for it.

                                    SBR corporate paid a sum between $4000-$6000 to have a private software developer to formulate an anti-mikejamm program. Specifics of this program have been difficult to obtain. Thanks to Thegiant and greenhippo we have deduced that on any given hand at a 10 player table you will only win this hand 4% of the time. However, preflop you will have a 23% chance of winning and if all 10 players see the flop you will have a 28% chance to win the hand. Continuing, if all 10 players see the turn you will have a 32% of winning. Finally if all 10 players see the river you will have a 35% chance of winning but you will only win 4% of the time if all 10 players show their hands.

                                    greenhippo, Thegiant and myself have spoken to SBR higher ups and they will strongly consider removing the anti-mikejamm program if you make a video apologizing about your poor behavior in the past and currently giving specifics about posting/chat habits that you will improve upon.

                                    Regards, SBR Detective Squad
                                    You know what hels? You use to post some reasonable view points regarding this. Now you just post stupid shit! Go back and keep drink'in the sbr ass kool-aid, it's rotted and fuk'in brainwashed you well. Sbr detective squad? More like the sbr dicksuk'in squad.
                                    Comment
                                    • Sam Odom
                                      SBR Aristocracy
                                      • 10-30-05
                                      • 58063

                                      #53
                                      mikey , a youtube video is to blame
                                      Comment
                                      • nosniboR11
                                        SBR Posting Legend
                                        • 09-02-08
                                        • 10042

                                        #54
                                        keep chirping you idiot cricket

                                        black and annoying and needs everything handed to him

                                        hey mike you are a piece of shi$

                                        why dont you bring your cricket but on down to Texas and see how we send your ass back, trust me if we can fuc# up parades then we for sure can fuk you up
                                        Comment
                                        • Trident
                                          SBR MVP
                                          • 02-07-09
                                          • 2362

                                          #55
                                          Originally posted by mikejamm
                                          You have to understand how programming works, if you're not computer literate, then you don't get it. It's a program, and you sign into it, it has your information and parameters as a player. And yes it can be manipulated to have a certain outcome against or for certain players. Which is exactly what happens here. Why do you think a newbie gets great cards during his first tourney? Or one fuk'in guy at your table will run hot and beat you at every fuk'in showdown? You call that variance? Come the fuk on, how fuk'in stupid do you have to be, to sit here and play night after night and watch how fuk'in redundant this shitty software is? A prime example is how the tourneys are "timed" to end the way they do. Someone has to program that software to operate like that! You think it just fuk'in magically ends up that way?
                                          Comment
                                          • mikejamm
                                            SBR Posting Legend
                                            • 08-24-09
                                            • 11034

                                            #56
                                            Like I said fellas, no hard feelings, I'm just done fuk'in around with rigged poker shit and a web site that has no integrity to want to make it right. I'm a good live player and there's no need for me to waste my fuk'in time here playing at a rigged shit hole like this. And you can bet your ass, when I'm sitting at a live televised event in the near future, wearing sponsor logos of every fuk'in site out there, you can bet this fuk'in shit hole won't be one of them, but I will let you all know in my own subtle way, just so you'll be able to say, "Yeah I played online with that guy, and he was right about how fuk'in rigged the poker at sbr is!"
                                            Comment
                                            • Vegas39
                                              BARRELED IN @ SBR!
                                              • 09-22-11
                                              • 30686

                                              #57
                                              another who is gonna conquer poker world
                                              Comment
                                              • Sam Odom
                                                SBR Aristocracy
                                                • 10-30-05
                                                • 58063

                                                #58
                                                Originally posted by mikejamm

                                                Like I said fellas, no hard feelings, I'm just done fuk'in around with rigged poker shit and a web site that has no integrity to want to make it right. I'm a good live player and there's no need for me to waste my fuk'in time here playing at a rigged shit hole like this. And you can bet your ass, when I'm sitting at a live televised event in the near future, wearing sponsor logos of every fuk'in site out there, you can bet this fuk'in shit hole won't be one of them, but I will let you all know in my own subtle way, just so you'll be able to say, "Yeah I played online with that guy, and he was right about how fuk'in rigged the poker at sbr is!"

                                                Saved for posterity...
                                                Comment
                                                • capitalist pig
                                                  SBR MVP
                                                  • 01-25-07
                                                  • 4996

                                                  #59
                                                  If you feel SBR is f*&^ing you at the poker table, why are you even playing there? Seems to me if your getting screwed night after night, common sense would say to not play here,JMO.

                                                  later
                                                  Comment
                                                  • Sam Odom
                                                    SBR Aristocracy
                                                    • 10-30-05
                                                    • 58063

                                                    #60
                                                    Originally posted by capitalist pig

                                                    If you feel SBR is f*&^ing you at the poker table, why are you even playing there?

                                                    Because SBR Pts = free
                                                    Comment
                                                    • k13
                                                      SBR Posting Legend
                                                      • 07-16-10
                                                      • 18060

                                                      #61
                                                      Originally posted by DrStale
                                                      So what exactly is your theory? That SBR has one of the mods just hanging around the Poker tables switching out your cards when they see you sit down? That makes way more sense than variance.
                                                      No, SBR has nothing really to do with it. They just bought the poker software which is a typical "online" RNG algorithm.

                                                      If there are short stacks, further in the tourney, bubble, their odds are decreased vs bigger stacks.
                                                      This is done so they are eliminated faster and "open" up another tourney. Thus more buy-ins in less time.
                                                      Obviously there is no "money" or "other" tourneys at SBR but this is already programmed into the RNG.

                                                      Rigging it completely would be a waste of SBR's time except maybe pro's vs non pro's in Cash Games.
                                                      Comment
                                                      • mikejamm
                                                        SBR Posting Legend
                                                        • 08-24-09
                                                        • 11034

                                                        #62
                                                        Originally posted by nosniboR11
                                                        keep chirping you idiot cricket

                                                        black and annoying and needs everything handed to him

                                                        hey mike you are a piece of shi$

                                                        why dont you bring your cricket but on down to Texas and see how we send your ass back, trust me if we can fuc# up parades then we for sure can fuk you up
                                                        Hate to break the news to you texas dumb shit, but I'm about as white as they come. My dad was Irish and mom was Cherokee Indian, but I didn't get much of that, my sisters did though. I'm just a good 'ol blue eyed brown hair liberal who works everyday asshole. I would come to texas, but that fuk'in dust bowl is about to dry up and blow the fuk away anyway! Plus, your phony ass god just makes you more fuk'in stupid. Where was your fuk'in god when some idiot drove a parade float onto some RR tracks without enough clearance to get all the way across? Bush and Perry, two texas retards who couldn't govern their way out of a room with one door.
                                                        Comment
                                                        • mikejamm
                                                          SBR Posting Legend
                                                          • 08-24-09
                                                          • 11034

                                                          #63
                                                          Originally posted by k13
                                                          No, SBR has nothing really to do with it. They just bought the poker software which is a typical "online" RNG algorithm.

                                                          If there are short stacks, further in the tourney, bubble, their odds are decreased vs bigger stacks.
                                                          This is done so they are eliminated faster and "open" up another tourney. Thus more buy-ins in less time.
                                                          Obviously there is no "money" or "other" tourneys at SBR but this is already programmed into the RNG.

                                                          Rigging it completely would be a waste of SBR's time except maybe pro's vs non pro's in Cash Games.
                                                          K13, I don't wanna say you contradict yourself here bro, but I think we both know what the fuk is going on here. The only part you got wrong was the "SBR has nothing really to do with it." These algorithms can be changed and adjusted by the site owner/programmer. The only real true variance is when the cards are being physically shuffled and dealt at a real live table. Anything online can be manipulated, just like that rigged fuk'in casino is.
                                                          Comment
                                                          • opie1988
                                                            SBR Posting Legend
                                                            • 09-12-10
                                                            • 23429

                                                            #64
                                                            Originally posted by mikejamm
                                                            Hate to break the news to you texas dumb shit, but I'm about as white as they come. My dad was Irish and mom was Cherokee Indian, but I didn't get much of that, my sisters did though. I'm just a good 'ol blue eyed brown hair liberal who works everyday asshole. I would come to texas, but that fuk'in dust bowl is about to dry up and blow the fuk away anyway! Plus, your phony ass god just makes you more fuk'in stupid. Where was your fuk'in god when some idiot drove a parade float onto some RR tracks without enough clearance to get all the way across? Bush and Perry, two texas retards who couldn't govern their way out of a room with one door.
                                                            Ohhhhh.....so you're a pie face.

                                                            That explains a lot.
                                                            Comment
                                                            • CanuckG
                                                              SBR Posting Legend
                                                              • 12-23-10
                                                              • 21976

                                                              #65
                                                              Bad beats happen. Grab a deck of cards deal yourself aces vs kings and put out the flop turn and river and eventually your kings will beat aces. Everyone easily remembers the bad beats but soons forgets the times they were lucky.
                                                              Comment
                                                              • hels
                                                                SBR Hall of Famer
                                                                • 04-12-09
                                                                • 8767

                                                                #66
                                                                Originally posted by mikejamm
                                                                Hate to break the news to you texas dumb shit, but I'm about as white as they come. My dad was Irish and mom was Cherokee Indian, but I didn't get much of that, my sisters did though. I'm just a good 'ol blue eyed brown hair liberal who works everyday asshole. I would come to texas, but that fuk'in dust bowl is about to dry up and blow the fuk away anyway! Plus, your phony ass god just makes you more fuk'in stupid. Where was your fuk'in god when some idiot drove a parade float onto some RR tracks without enough clearance to get all the way across? Bush and Perry, two texas retards who couldn't govern their way out of a room with one door.


                                                                If you don't even understand simple genetics of 50 + 50 you should get back to your teepee and hibernate for the winter.
                                                                Comment
                                                                • TheMoneyShot
                                                                  BARRELED IN @ SBR!
                                                                  • 02-14-07
                                                                  • 28672

                                                                  #67
                                                                  Originally posted by paranoyd androyd
                                                                  quad aces out to the royal flush
                                                                  All of these bad beats makes me wanna play more!!! 3PM tourney here I come... FOR ANOTHER BAD BEAT!!!
                                                                  Comment
                                                                  • GamblerSpirit
                                                                    SBR MVP
                                                                    • 11-18-11
                                                                    • 4085

                                                                    #68
                                                                    Originally posted by nosniboR11
                                                                    black and annoying and needs everything handed to him
                                                                    We have a Mitt Romney voter over here.
                                                                    Comment
                                                                    • nosniboR11
                                                                      SBR Posting Legend
                                                                      • 09-02-08
                                                                      • 10042

                                                                      #69
                                                                      jump piece of shit
                                                                      Comment
                                                                      • mikejamm
                                                                        SBR Posting Legend
                                                                        • 08-24-09
                                                                        • 11034

                                                                        #70
                                                                        Originally posted by hels


                                                                        If you don't even understand simple genetics of 50 + 50 you should get back to your teepee and hibernate for the winter.
                                                                        That's right asshole! I can out drink your stupid ass and shoot you in face with a fuk'in arrow! I'm sure you already take plenty of c u m shots to the face!
                                                                        Comment
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