Lots of talk lately about friction in marriages where wives make more$ than husbands

[swede96]

MORNING BONES!!!

Well now that's a good question... how do I figure that..?

To start with there is much less quality time couples put towards each other... Women AND Men are too busy doing other things... The choices are changing and technology is one reason... Before you can call someone at home and "TALK" to them or if you were in their presents you had to share quality time with them and get to know them... Now when you call someone you don't know if they are busy, driving, f*cking, at the store, or god knows what else...

Today I see a couple sit there and one is texting while the other is playing fantasy somethingBALL!!! The wife might be on the net in a forum chatting because it's more fun then dealing with the same ole' everyday while the husband has more interest in his starting fantasy quarterback then to ask his wife how her day went...

Okay, there it is...we're talking about two different things. You're right, people spend less quality time together once they are in a relationshipand or married than they used to. I was saying that people have more time before they settle down to find that person. Then you add into it all of the internet dating sites, etc. and you have people that are being more and more picky about who they choose. There are just more options out there to consider.

These are only two distractions of thousands I can name as to why people don't have childrem and get married as early as they once did... People didn't just decide "oh well I am waiting to get married" but rather they are too busy caught up in other things to get married like a career...

Well that's not entirely the individual's fault. With housing prices, college tuition, and divorce rates on the rise, I think people are just trying to be fully prepared for whatever gets thrown at them before they jump into getting married and starting a family. At least that's why I'm not married with kids yet. I'm trying to make sure that no matter what happens, I can take care of myself and my children once I have them. Of course, some people are just more concerned with their career and their own needs.

Here is an example: My friend a few years ago graduated college and got a job in San Fransico but his girl has one in Chicago... He put his "carrer" over her and all that "career" is selling fork lifts for a company... BIG F*CKIN' DEAL!!! Years ago family was more important now it's a "career" which is someone thinking they do something important but really don't...

Was he planning on marrying the girl?

[ShamsWoof10]

Okay, there it is...we're talking about two different things. You're right, people spend less quality time together once they are in a relationshipand or married than they used to. I was saying that people have more time before they settle down to find that person. Then you add into it all of the internet dating sites, etc. and you have people that are being more and more picky about who they choose. There are just more options out there to consider.

I don't believe we are talking about two differant things... Single people consume themselves with the same distractions and it's even worse because they don't have the responsiblity of having that other person in their life... When you spend your time watching sports, playing fantasy this and that, texting to every Tom, Dick, and Harry, and all the other distractions you are aware of then you have to consider that doing all of this sh*t takes "TIME" and leaves LESS "TIME" for other things... Throw the meaningless career in there and you barely have time to sleep much less go pussy shopping...

We are busier then ever but most of it is bullsh*t time... We spend soooo much time and effort entainning ourselves and we call it being busy...lol

some people are just more concerned with their career and their own needs.

This is all that needed to be said.... You hit it right on the head... for once

Career is the most over used word that the average person uses to make themselves feel important...

After talking to so many married and divorced people I am starting to look at marriage like partying on the weekend... All week you look forward to it and get really excited about it... Friday comes around and you go out and get sh*t faced then wonder why you did it in the first place and swear to yourself you won't do it again... What I am saying is it seems like people are married to the "idea" of it more then the person themselves...

[swede96]

I don't believe we are talking about two differant things... Single people consume themselves with the same distractions and it's even worse because they don't have the responsiblity of having that other person in their life... When you spend your time watching sports, playing fantasy this and that, texting to every Tom, Dick, and Harry, and all the other distractions you are aware of then you have to consider that doing all of this sh*t takes "TIME" and leaves LESS "TIME" for other things... Throw the meaningless career in there and you barely have time to sleep much less go pussy shopping...

We are busier then ever but most of it is bullsh*t time... We spend soooo much time and effort entainning ourselves and we call it being busy...lol

Yes, but what I'm saying is that I think people allow themselves to be distracted because they actually have more time to settle down and have kids. Fifty years ago, people were in such a rush to get married because women were pretty much done with their baby making prime by 25. With the medical advaced that have been made, women are far more likely to be able to carry a baby to term much older than that. Hell, my mom had me when she was 30. That was only 24 years ago and it was a VERY difficult pregnancy. I was due in November. She was put on bed rest in August. Then I was born October 5th. She was pretty old to be having a baby at that point. They told her from the beginning she would have a rough one because of her age. Now we see women having babies at almost 50 with no problems. That's what I mean about having more time. People have time to allow themselves to be distracted because they can always start their family later in life. Also, it has become far more socially acceptable for people to not start a family at all. In the past, people thought there was something wrong with a woman if she didn't want to marry and have kids by the time she was 20. Plus, it has become much more acceptable for a woman to have a career of her own. Women are making their own money now. They don't have to settle for the first guy that offers to take care of them.

This is all that needed to be said.... You hit it right on the head... for once

Career is the most over used word that the average person uses to make themselves feel important...

After talking to so many married and divorced people I am starting to look at marriage like partying on the weekend... All week you look forward to it and get really excited about it... Friday comes around and you go out and get sh*t faced then wonder why you did it in the first place and swear to yourself you won't do it again... What I am saying is it seems like people are married to the "idea" of it more then the person themselves...

Unfortunatly, Shams...I think marriage has become more of a money saver for some people. Tax breaks...lower car insurance...able to get on one person's healthcare...there's a whole list. You would think in this day and age, when people can be more selective about chosing their mate, they would choose more wisely and end up with someone they can actually love and be happy with forever. That's my plan. If I don't find him (which I believe I have), I just won't get married. I understand people wanting to have a family...but consider the kids...is it really worth having kids if they'll have to grow up in a household with miserable parents? Happy parent have happry kids...and happy kids generally do not shoot up their schools or murder puppies.

[swede96]

How come when Shamsie and I are actually having a civil conversation, he doesn't want to play wif me?

[ShamsWoof10]

How come when Shamsie and I are actually having a civil conversation, he doesn't want to play wif me?

oh... sorry "BONES" I'll reply in a minute.. I gotta count the hair follicales I lost sweating this one out...

Working on reply... You know I never noticed your eyes were crossed in the picture before that's f*cked up... explains a lot though...

I doubt you're taking requests but I'll have to submit my choice for the avatar.. There is actually one I really liked...

"Crazyl" I am publically telling you to be patient damn it... We'll get this sh*t!

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[swede96]

Shams, you may submitt a request, but I can't garuntee it will be honored.

Also, what's the over/under on crazyl keeping his yapper shut?

Please know that I'll be baiting him whenever possible...you know...for fun.

[ShamsWoof10]

Yes, but what I'm saying is that I think people allow themselves to be distracted because they actually have more time to settle down and have kids. Fifty years ago, people were in such a rush to get married because women were pretty much done with their baby making prime by 25. With the medical advaced that have been made, women are far more likely to be able to carry a baby to term much older than that. Hell, my mom had me when she was 30. That was only 24 years ago and it was a VERY difficult pregnancy. I was due in November. She was put on bed rest in August. Then I was born October 5th. She was pretty old to be having a baby at that point. They told her from the beginning she would have a rough one because of her age. Now we see women having babies at almost 50 with no problems. That's what I mean about having more time. People have time to allow themselves to be distracted because they can always start their family later in life. Also, it has become far more socially acceptable for people to not start a family at all. In the past, people thought there was something wrong with a woman if she didn't want to marry and have kids by the time she was 20. Plus, it has become much more acceptable for a woman to have a career of her own. Women are making their own money now. They don't have to settle for the first guy that offers to take care of them.

I agree that people not only allow themselves to be but it's as you said in a previous post.. They allow themselves because they are selfish and would rather play with the toys society provides now as opposed to sitting at home dedicating their time and effort into a family because it's boring compared to the toys...

I don't think it has anything to do with medical advances... I think it's social acceptance and the economy growing to provide the jobs for women who can now provide for themselves... A carrer in reality just means a woman can support herself by herself now...

My dad had a child at age 55 and my step mom was over 40... This has been common place from their villages in the past... There are villages there where people over 100 walking up a hill to get their water is still common place... These people don't know what the internet is and I don't know if they even know WWII ever happend... People in this society with "medical advancements" can't wipe their own as* at 80...

The fact that it has become more acceptable is your best and only point above...

Unfortunatly, Shams...I think marriage has become more of a money saver for some people. Tax breaks...lower car insurance...able to get on one person's healthcare...there's a whole list. You would think in this day and age, when people can be more selective about chosing their mate, they would choose more wisely and end up with someone they can actually love and be happy with forever. That's my plan. If I don't find him (which I believe I have), I just won't get married. I understand people wanting to have a family...but consider the kids...is it really worth having kids if they'll have to grow up in a household with miserable parents? Happy parent have happry kids...and happy kids generally do not shoot up their schools or murder puppies.

I believe it's always been a money saver but now it's just a differant flavor... As I said I think the ultimate reason why people get married is for convience and money is just ONE of those...

By the way my request is the one where your sister's boobs are on the right... You looked good in that IMO... Everything matched well...hair color, eye color, and skin tone... You also looked the most natural in that one...

[swede96]

I agree that people not only allow themselves to be but it's as you said in a previous post.. They allow themselves because they are selfish and would rather play with the toys society provides now as opposed to sitting at home dedicating their time and effort into a family because it's boring compared to the toys...

That's not entirely true. Not everybody is being selfish by not starting a family. Some simply never want to, which is fine. Some, like me, just want to make sure they are financially secure and in a strong relationship before they bring children into the world. I think if more poeple that respnsible about when they had children, there would be far less people on welfare, child abuse, and divorces.

I don't think it has anything to do with medical advances... I think it's social acceptance and the economy growing to provide the jobs for women who can now provide for themselves... A carrer in reality just means a woman can support herself by herself now...

My dad had a child at age 55 and my step mom was over 40... This has been common place from their villages in the past... There are villages there where people over 100 walking up a hill to get their water is still common place... These people don't know what the internet and I don't know if they even know WWII ever happend... People in this society with "medical advancements" can't wipe their own as* at 80...

I think it's both. It's medical fact that the success rate of pregnancies in women over 30 or 35 are far higher now than they were years ago.

As far as your family, well, this is America. It seems to me that we are the most unhealty coutry in the world. Of course, there are thrid world contries with far lower life expectancies...but as far as nations that supposedly are technologically advanced, we are a mess. My statements about medical advances were directed at this country because I don't pretend to know these things about other parts of the world.

The fact that it has become more acceptable is your best and only point above...

Why? Why add that? We're having a civil dicsussion. I think I made plenty of valid points. Just because you do not agree with them or we may me misunderstanding each other, that doesn't mean my points aren't valid.

I believe it's always been a money saver but now it's just a differant flavor... As I said I think the ultimate reason why people get married is for convience and money is just ONE of those...

Well, I'm not going to be that cynical. When I get married, it will be because I love that man very much and I want to make a commitment to love him for the rest of my life.

[swede96]

By the way my request is the one where your sister's boobs are on the right... You looked good in that IMO... Everything matched well...hair color, eye color, and skin tone... You also looked the most natural in that one...

Really? Natural? I probably have the most make up on in that one...and my hair is naturally curly, but I like knowing that I don't look fake with straight hair! I've never been one to pile on make up or tan in a booth or anything like that. I have NO make up on in my current avitar. But I like that picture of me too. I'll take that into consideration.

[BadNina]

Could someone please come get me after this is over?? Shamsy and Swede getting along has scared me and I'm hiding under my desk.

[swede96]

Sorry, did you stay there all night?!

I was hiding under mine too.