Reasons Why Karma May Catch Up with The Patriots on Super Sunday.
For all of you Giants fans out there, or New England Patriots haters (which is my case as a Jets fan), here's a small list of reasons why, if good is meant to conquer evil, the Patriots will lose Super Bowl XLII this Sunday in Arizona.
1. Tom Brady is a deadbeat. Does Tom Brady, the model American quarterback do the responsible thing and be a father to the child of his pregnant, now ex-girlfriend? Nope, Tom doesn't even show up until after the kid is born, will probably skip out on some of his child support with all that money he has, and would rather frolick around NEW YORK CITY (Not Boston) with his new girlfriend. At least he's doing his best to dispel those hair loss rumors. (He should embrace it, like I do)
2. Bill Belichick would probably sell his children for another Super Bowl ring. The only legendary name that comes to mind when I think of Bill Belichick aren't ones like Lombardi, Parcells, Walsh, Landry, and Shula, but rather, another diminutive, smug, conqueror: Napoleon. While the French dictator stole the Mona Lisa from Italy in his reign on the world, the serial killer-looking head coach stole signals from other teams. AND he's going to end up getting a top ten draft pick as a reward no matter what the outcome is on Sunday. (Thanks to the miserable season of the 49ers who traded their first round pick to the Patsies last year.)
3. Randy "He-Man Women Hater" Moss. This distinguished gentleman enjoys reading, long walks on the beach, running reporters over with his car, getting paid when he's not working all the time (in Minnesota/Oakland), and harrassing some poor lady for the better part of a decade as he's been recently accused of. Luckily, this woman has a restraining order out on Dandy Randy, but maybe he'll send his old buddy Daunte Culpepper over to egg her house. We all know Daunte wasn't too busy this season and isn't too busy now. Randy is this Super Bowl's Tank Johnson, facing serious legal troubles and charges leading up to the big game, his moral-less coach (Like Lovie Smith did with Tank last year) is starting this delinquent for the big game. Lovie was embarrassed by one Manning last year for his morality, maybe this year little Bill will be embarrassed by the other Manning (highly unlikely, but one can only wish).
4.Roid-ney I mean Rodney Harrison. Granted, I'm sure half of the NFL is on HGH or steroids, but Roidney Harrison is one of the few who's gotten caught, and after serving a measily 4 game suspension at the beginning of the season, all was forgiven and forgotten.
5. Who, besides Patriots fans, realllly want to see them win another Super Bowl any time this decade? Maybe Eagles/Cowboys fans, but even with this game being a Jets fan like myself's worst nightmare, I still have to cheer for big blue on Sunday. As much as it stings me to say that, and as much as I would hate to hear Giants fans' heads flapping about this for the next 5 years, or until the Jets win a Super Bowl (Probably around the same time Eli is getting inducted into the Hall of Fame), this evil empire cannot be supported anymore. They've got baseball, football, and probably basketball this year all on lockdown, with the rest of the country with nothing to show for it.
For all of you Giants fans out there, or New England Patriots haters (which is my case as a Jets fan), here's a small list of reasons why, if good is meant to conquer evil, the Patriots will lose Super Bowl XLII this Sunday in Arizona.
1. Tom Brady is a deadbeat. Does Tom Brady, the model American quarterback do the responsible thing and be a father to the child of his pregnant, now ex-girlfriend? Nope, Tom doesn't even show up until after the kid is born, will probably skip out on some of his child support with all that money he has, and would rather frolick around NEW YORK CITY (Not Boston) with his new girlfriend. At least he's doing his best to dispel those hair loss rumors. (He should embrace it, like I do)
2. Bill Belichick would probably sell his children for another Super Bowl ring. The only legendary name that comes to mind when I think of Bill Belichick aren't ones like Lombardi, Parcells, Walsh, Landry, and Shula, but rather, another diminutive, smug, conqueror: Napoleon. While the French dictator stole the Mona Lisa from Italy in his reign on the world, the serial killer-looking head coach stole signals from other teams. AND he's going to end up getting a top ten draft pick as a reward no matter what the outcome is on Sunday. (Thanks to the miserable season of the 49ers who traded their first round pick to the Patsies last year.)
3. Randy "He-Man Women Hater" Moss. This distinguished gentleman enjoys reading, long walks on the beach, running reporters over with his car, getting paid when he's not working all the time (in Minnesota/Oakland), and harrassing some poor lady for the better part of a decade as he's been recently accused of. Luckily, this woman has a restraining order out on Dandy Randy, but maybe he'll send his old buddy Daunte Culpepper over to egg her house. We all know Daunte wasn't too busy this season and isn't too busy now. Randy is this Super Bowl's Tank Johnson, facing serious legal troubles and charges leading up to the big game, his moral-less coach (Like Lovie Smith did with Tank last year) is starting this delinquent for the big game. Lovie was embarrassed by one Manning last year for his morality, maybe this year little Bill will be embarrassed by the other Manning (highly unlikely, but one can only wish).
4.Roid-ney I mean Rodney Harrison. Granted, I'm sure half of the NFL is on HGH or steroids, but Roidney Harrison is one of the few who's gotten caught, and after serving a measily 4 game suspension at the beginning of the season, all was forgiven and forgotten.
5. Who, besides Patriots fans, realllly want to see them win another Super Bowl any time this decade? Maybe Eagles/Cowboys fans, but even with this game being a Jets fan like myself's worst nightmare, I still have to cheer for big blue on Sunday. As much as it stings me to say that, and as much as I would hate to hear Giants fans' heads flapping about this for the next 5 years, or until the Jets win a Super Bowl (Probably around the same time Eli is getting inducted into the Hall of Fame), this evil empire cannot be supported anymore. They've got baseball, football, and probably basketball this year all on lockdown, with the rest of the country with nothing to show for it.