BTP V: Come get some bitches
Holy Christ ladies we finally got to the sweet spot. Been workin my fat white ass off all summer an aint got paid a red cent yet. Looks like I only gotta go perfect against around 350 or so of you friggin squares to get paid this year. 5k of my pay up for grabs. No worries, I reckon I got you sheep surrounded.
Been a busy summer convincin these big-shot bookmakers how forum posters are square as shit. No lie, some of them fellas was skerred to sponsor my gig, whining an crying about how sharp SBR posters are and how they can’t get no “return on their investment” whatever that latin shit means. Kinda hard to listen to that crap with a straight face, aint nothing gives bookies a bigger chubby than squares who got access to BS stats an facts who think they got a edge. Musta done sumthin right cause we got a group of good shops lined up for this deal startin’ with BetJamaica.
I figger at least half of you girls is brokedik contest whoores who aint never posted up an aint never gonna. Mebbe 30% or so is real players who got or had accounts at every shop on the planet. My arithmetical skills indicate that leaves about 200 that need ta get in the game, an its them fellers who make or break this deal. You aint gotta do shit ta win this year but sign up at some pretty good shops, if yer gonna play anyplace make it a BTP sponsor an ya cant go wrong at BetJam.
One last nugget of wisdom ta share with you queers fore we get down ta business: anybody tells ya TacoBell is fit for human consummtion an you need ta beat ‘em with a 2x4. My ol lady brought home a sacka that trash Sunday nite an before halftime I plowed about 4 gallons of napalm. It I was smokin on the throne there woulda been a 911 call. I aint no physicist or nuthin but how the hell can ya eat 2 tacos (mebbe 1/3 pound total) and then end up dumpin 9-10 gallons of DDT?
Time ta piss or get offa the pot, this is why we’re all here. BTP V starts now:
Iowa State +6.5 Check that anals of history boys, believe I been on this game every fackin year so far an prolly on the wrong side. Dunno who the Cyclone coach is but he gotta be better’n that Chisdik braniac. Only reason Chisdik got hisself another gig is on accounta the fact that hes a honky. Them krackers at Auburn burn so many crosses they make me look like Malcom X. I digress, this game is always a war, specially at Jack Trice. ISU is fresh offa snappin a 10 game losin streak and the final score is gonna be 9-8 either way.
USC -6.5 Yeah the USC qb is a freshman. Yeah this is his first road test an Columbus is a tough joint ta play (State 39-4 at home since 2003). Yeah the Buckeyes got a axe ta grind after that beatin in SoCal last year. Don’t matter, if Navy can run the ball against these Bucks the Trojans are gonna lite up the scoreboard like a fackin japanese pinball machine. I’m layin the road chalk here boys, an anybody with a lick a sense will do the same.
Pittsburgh Steelers -6 Aint no such thing as a lock boys, specially not in the NFL, but this looks pretty friggin easy. Don’t overthink this thing, alla that smoke comin outta yer ears is a waste of energy an it makes people look at ya funny. So what the Oilers beat Pittsburgh sometimes? Just pull the trigger, scared money never wins.
Dallas Cowboys -6 Lesson here boys is ya gamble with yer brains an balls, not yer hearts. Love the Bucs, hate the Cowgirls. But who in gods green universe fires the offensive coordinator the week before the season starts? This Buc defense is a shadow of its former self an offensively they get outrun by paint dryin. Aint nobody gonna make a living bettin road faves in the NFL, but if the Boys don’t cover this nut I’ll let you buncha queers split my 5 grand.
Thats it for me boys, got my line in the water an waitin ta pull out a 5,000 pound bass. Im gonna check back an make sure none of you wankers is talkin shit. rest assured i got plenty of beatdown on hand ta cover every choade that flaps their lips.
Been a busy summer convincin these big-shot bookmakers how forum posters are square as shit. No lie, some of them fellas was skerred to sponsor my gig, whining an crying about how sharp SBR posters are and how they can’t get no “return on their investment” whatever that latin shit means. Kinda hard to listen to that crap with a straight face, aint nothing gives bookies a bigger chubby than squares who got access to BS stats an facts who think they got a edge. Musta done sumthin right cause we got a group of good shops lined up for this deal startin’ with BetJamaica.
I figger at least half of you girls is brokedik contest whoores who aint never posted up an aint never gonna. Mebbe 30% or so is real players who got or had accounts at every shop on the planet. My arithmetical skills indicate that leaves about 200 that need ta get in the game, an its them fellers who make or break this deal. You aint gotta do shit ta win this year but sign up at some pretty good shops, if yer gonna play anyplace make it a BTP sponsor an ya cant go wrong at BetJam.
One last nugget of wisdom ta share with you queers fore we get down ta business: anybody tells ya TacoBell is fit for human consummtion an you need ta beat ‘em with a 2x4. My ol lady brought home a sacka that trash Sunday nite an before halftime I plowed about 4 gallons of napalm. It I was smokin on the throne there woulda been a 911 call. I aint no physicist or nuthin but how the hell can ya eat 2 tacos (mebbe 1/3 pound total) and then end up dumpin 9-10 gallons of DDT?
Time ta piss or get offa the pot, this is why we’re all here. BTP V starts now:
Iowa State +6.5 Check that anals of history boys, believe I been on this game every fackin year so far an prolly on the wrong side. Dunno who the Cyclone coach is but he gotta be better’n that Chisdik braniac. Only reason Chisdik got hisself another gig is on accounta the fact that hes a honky. Them krackers at Auburn burn so many crosses they make me look like Malcom X. I digress, this game is always a war, specially at Jack Trice. ISU is fresh offa snappin a 10 game losin streak and the final score is gonna be 9-8 either way.
USC -6.5 Yeah the USC qb is a freshman. Yeah this is his first road test an Columbus is a tough joint ta play (State 39-4 at home since 2003). Yeah the Buckeyes got a axe ta grind after that beatin in SoCal last year. Don’t matter, if Navy can run the ball against these Bucks the Trojans are gonna lite up the scoreboard like a fackin japanese pinball machine. I’m layin the road chalk here boys, an anybody with a lick a sense will do the same.
Pittsburgh Steelers -6 Aint no such thing as a lock boys, specially not in the NFL, but this looks pretty friggin easy. Don’t overthink this thing, alla that smoke comin outta yer ears is a waste of energy an it makes people look at ya funny. So what the Oilers beat Pittsburgh sometimes? Just pull the trigger, scared money never wins.
Dallas Cowboys -6 Lesson here boys is ya gamble with yer brains an balls, not yer hearts. Love the Bucs, hate the Cowgirls. But who in gods green universe fires the offensive coordinator the week before the season starts? This Buc defense is a shadow of its former self an offensively they get outrun by paint dryin. Aint nobody gonna make a living bettin road faves in the NFL, but if the Boys don’t cover this nut I’ll let you buncha queers split my 5 grand.
Thats it for me boys, got my line in the water an waitin ta pull out a 5,000 pound bass. Im gonna check back an make sure none of you wankers is talkin shit. rest assured i got plenty of beatdown on hand ta cover every choade that flaps their lips.
