Men - Going Under

PittsburghPlayer · 05-05-16, 06:39 AM

Well some see this life as nothing more than pain
It's pay out this and line up here
It's all just too insane...
Well I feel the blues a coming down like rain...
My feelings are so complicated I wish I could explain...

loneliness becomes a way of life
And you turn off your tv set
To shut out all the strife
But there are things that help to ease the pain
you make that call, he guarantees to paralyze... your brain

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PittsburghPlayer · 05-05-16, 07:00 AM

Fukk it. Time for a break...

PittsburghPlayer · 05-05-16, 04:19 PM

Is this thread still here?

god damn it. it is.

I called a forensic psychologist today - he is going to help me work shit out.

What is "forum reset"? That reads kinda cool. I need a reset!!

I suppose that is obvious!!

KVB · 05-05-16, 05:15 PM

Before the forum reset I believe I posted in this thread that I hope all is well and that you are feeling alright.

Stay safe Pitt.

Auto Donk · 05-05-16, 08:15 PM

yep, hang in there....

BiTeMe UsAdOj · 05-06-16, 12:34 AM

'Player... as long as you move in this world with good intentions while never conspiring to do intentional harm, you're batting far better than most in this (oft times) fukked up Game o' Life, and that's something you should be proud in achieving.

Life ain't easy. You can't control other people's actions or perceptions (regardless of blood relation), so... Let That Go.

There's more going on here than meets the eye... science proves that, forget the religious nonsense; your heart knows right from wrong, follow that instinct and always take comfort in knowing everything will be OK, ultimately, if you do so. Your mom continues to know your heart's intentions, make her proud of you going forward with how you come out the other side from all these feelings you're experiencing.

Only worry about controlling yourself; your siblings perceptions (or any others) don't matter. Work hard to release the anger you may hold toward others, for that's not important in getting you to where you need to go in the back-half of your life's journey.

Peace, health & happiness to you going forward.

PittsburghPlayer · 05-06-16, 03:21 AM

BiteMe, Holy shit was that kind and thoughtful. Well written, smart, considerate, Thought provoking!

I will go outside now, at this hour - to look up to the stars/heavens and ...

and try to stop crying from the love of your words!

Your Mom would be pleased. Very pleased.

Also, I sent KVB a thank you note for his kind/thoughtful words.

Donk, Thank you man. Just thank you.

Auto Donk · 05-06-16, 09:47 AM

Biter knows his stuff....

Very wise, and accurate post! And from a man who recently stared death in the face and told it to "fuk off"!!!

Good advice/outlook for all of us!

Da Manster! · 05-06-16, 10:23 AM

Originally posted by biteme usadoj

'player... As long as you move in this world with good intentions while never conspiring to do intentional harm, you're batting far better than most in this (oft times) fukked up game o' life, and that's something you should be proud in achieving.

Life ain't easy. You can't control other people's actions or perceptions (regardless of blood relation), so... let that go.

There's more going on here than meets the eye... Science proves that, forget the religious nonsense; your heart knows right from wrong, follow that instinct and always take comfort in knowing everything will be ok, ultimately, if you do so. Your mom continues to know your heart's intentions, make her proud of you going forward with how you come out the other side from all these feelings you're experiencing.

Only worry about controlling yourself; your siblings perceptions (or any others) don't matter. Work hard to release the anger you may hold toward others, for that's not important in getting you to where you need to go in the back-half of your life's journey.

Peace, health & happiness to you going forward.

amen

KVB · 05-06-16, 10:43 AM

PittPlayer, check in pal.

Swinging Johnson · 05-06-16, 12:15 PM

Originally posted by BiTeMe UsAdOj

'Player... as long as you move in this world with good intentions while never conspiring to do intentional harm, you're batting far better than most in this (oft times) fukked up Game o' Life, and that's something you should be proud in achieving.

Life ain't easy. You can't control other people's actions or perceptions (regardless of blood relation), so... Let That Go.

There's more going on here than meets the eye... science proves that, forget the religious nonsense; your heart knows right from wrong, follow that instinct and always take comfort in knowing everything will be OK, ultimately, if you do so. Your mom continues to know your heart's intentions, make her proud of you going forward with how you come out the other side from all these feelings you're experiencing.

Only worry about controlling yourself; your siblings perceptions (or any others) don't matter. Work hard to release the anger you may hold toward others, for that's not important in getting you to where you need to go in the back-half of your life's journey.

Peace, health & happiness to you going forward.

Nothing to say when someone has said it all. Pitty, we got you.

BiTeMe UsAdOj · 05-06-16, 12:18 PM

There'll be peace...

You'll be fine
In your time

In your time
The innocence will fall away
In your time
The mission bells will toll
All along
The corridors and river beds
There'll be sign
In your time

Towering waves
Will crash across your southern capes
Massive storms
Will reach your eastern shores
Fields of green

Will tumble through your summer days
By design
In your time

Feel the wind
And set yourself the bolder course
Keep your heart
As open as a shrine
You'll sail the perfect line

And after all
The dead ends and the lessons learned
After all
The stars have turned to stone
There'll be peace
Across the great unbroken void
All benign
In your time
You'll be fine
In your time

PittsburghPlayer · 05-07-16, 12:57 AM

Originally posted by KVB

PittPlayer, check in pal.

I am here. Just woke up. Have to make coffee.
I am sorry I caused concern, but very thankful for it.

I will clean, edit this post in a bit.

edit: I am not sure how to proceed - with my words...
other than to write that... (pardon my poor grammar/sentence structure and all else that makes reading my shit difficult) -
I will stay alive and have zero intentions of or will I ever resort to violence of any sort . . .also, writing and reading responses here has indeed made a positive difference.

Much appreciation to BiteMe, SwingMan, KVB, DaManster, AutoDonkDude...

KVB · 05-07-16, 01:01 AM

Auto Donk · 05-07-16, 01:03 AM

if it ever gets real bad, call no, not the Bat Phone, but rather the Donk Phone....

or flash the big Donk-shaped spotlight into the air, and one of my scantily clad assistants will notify me immediately....

Snowball · 05-07-16, 04:32 PM

cheer up

PittsburghPlayer · 05-08-16, 05:21 PM

[QUOTE=PittsburghPlayer;25671053]I just can not bring myself back from...
I am buried, that is all.

3 1/2 days ago I posted/started this thread... Feels like a week, even longer. I wish that I were kidding - but I am not.

The men that have made comments have shown nothing but class, decency. The rest of the forum that opened the thread but did not comment showed that same class. Same decency. I write "thank you" to all.

Please know that I have spent many hours, made many attempts to write it out here - what it is that has broken the fukk out of my spirit . . .
Unable to, it is a very long story and I fukk it up with - other than stellar grammar practices!!

If no one responds to this post, I will not be offended at all.
I know that I will never bump this thread again, but I will respond to... I am not going anywhere.

Are you one of mine who can sleep with one eye open wide?
Agonizing psychotic solitary hours to decide
Reaching for the light at the slightest noise from the floor
Palms of hands perspire heart goes leaping at a knock from the door.
In the Dead of Night
In the Dead of Night
Rich and powerful ascend complicated bends to be free
To indulge in what they will and jaded thrill or fanstasy
Shuttered windows that belie all stifled cries from within
And prying eyes are blind to proceedings of the kind that begin
In the Dead of Night
In the Dead of Night

and thank you Snowball for the pic and well-wishes...

Fire in da hole · 05-08-16, 05:30 PM

Double down on the Spurs tonight, they will come through for you.

PittsburghPlayer · 05-08-16, 05:45 PM

Ya know what? I have not placed a wager in a week or two, but I am going to do that!
or at least "look into" it

Love the avatar Fire - that`s fukking classic!

KVB · 05-08-16, 05:50 PM

I'm not sure exactly what's going on here Pitt but this thread is available for you to vent any time you feel like it...and so are my PM's.

Even if I stop posting analysis at SBR because I don't have time to chase around the posters who lie about my threads, I'll be around.

Take some time, get some fresh air and sun, and then concentrate not on the negative, but the positive things. Really, make a list of the positive things happening around and with you, even if it's as basic as you having a quiet place to take a shit.

Take care bro.

PittsburghPlayer · 05-09-16, 08:17 AM

Originally posted by KVB

I'm not sure exactly what's going on here Pitt but this thread is available for you to vent any time you feel like it...and so are my PM's.

Even if I stop posting analysis at SBR because I don't have time to chase around the posters who lie about my threads, I'll be around.

Take some time, get some fresh air and sun, and then concentrate not on the negative, but the positive things. Really, make a list of the positive things happening around and with you, even if it's as basic as you having a quiet place to take a shit.

Take care bro.

Maybe attorney will bring me relief in an hour or so. I doubt it.

I have life by the balls - Don`t feel it.

back outside to work...

Auto Donk · 05-09-16, 12:24 PM

i thought they lived in another state.... did they move in on top of you, or is this someone else.....

I'd meet up with you, but my neighbors got a tro against u as well after you housesat for me

I may give you a shout to see wtf is going on..... it may be time to file a motion to dissolve any f'n active tro against you....

PittsburghPlayer · 05-09-16, 12:35 PM

Originally posted by Auto Donk

i thought they lived in another state.... did they move in on top of you, or is this someone else.....

I'd meet up with you, but my neighbors got a tro against u as well after you housesat for me

I may give you a shout to see wtf is going on..... it may be time to file a motion to dissolve any f'n active tro against you....

We will talk... Thank you. I want to write your name, but will not - just like you will never write or say what a fukking p o s that a particular member of my family is!

Auto Donk · 05-09-16, 12:40 PM

Yah, I'm tired of seeing my boy going through all this f'n strife and strain.....

I'll call you around 4-5 my time

ps.... no blowing will be necessary

PittsburghPlayer · 05-09-16, 04:07 PM

Originally posted by Auto Donk

Yah, I'm tired of seeing my boy going through all this f'n strife and strain.....
I'll call you around 4-5 my time
ps.... no blowing will be necessary

Cool...

that is all I can write at this time.

One day I will be able to put to words what it is that is fukking me up.

Thanks Men - I am going to let this thread fade away unless someone adds to it.

Really, I feel like a pussy for this thread and thank you all for your support.

edit, again... this is a big deal for me, that today I made breakfast for the 3rd or 4th time this year...

I am heading in the right direction, if even slowly.

Those Motherfukkers...

Depending on what my attorney advises me, I have a picket sign on my front yard some day soon . . .

the man that abused my Mother is...powerful. However, I have shown long ago that I am willing to die for justice. Let him have me arrested, jailed, killed.

ftr, this man denied my Mother medical attention after a stroke after she trusted him with her life while in Italy. My family was complicit in this abuse, I can only guess that they loved cash - Not Mom - as he paid everyone involved, paid them off.
I will take to the internet... whatever it takes, within the law, to expose these cokksuckers for their criminal behavior.

Thanks again for your giving a fukk - to ALL of you... IT has made the difference.

Thank you.

RudyRuetigger · 05-10-16, 07:49 PM

you make breakfast, you drink beers, you smoke weed, you do w/e you can to not think of it....that's just a cover up and the pain will still be there.

you go pound his face in, then make breakfast, drink beer, smoke weed..what he did will still be there

weird I know, but you have to try to forgive

but if it was criminally wrong, seek justice first

Auto Donk · 05-11-16, 05:32 PM

I've advised a half-dozen or so clients over the past several years, who were letting a TRO against them really bother them, but where the grounds weren't there to dissolve it, to not let it get to them, as if they weren't planning on violating it, who the fuk really cares that it was entered.... it's just sitting in a court file and shouldn't affect their life in any way..... forget about it... live your life and don't obsess on the fact that it may have not been justified on the facts....

just stay the fuk away from the complainant, and live your life.....

now, if it really stops you from living that life due to some unreasonable restrictions on what you can personally do or not do, then let's take it to court and see if it can be dissolved or modified in a manner such that it keeps whatever protection they were seeking in place, but lifts the restrictions on you that were unreasonable.....

bout to head back to my office, player, I'll call you on the way up there

ps... there's a f'n lawyer here in htown named jim adler, that calls himself the "texas hammer", and he's on the radio yappin' nonstop about how his "hammer is ready to SWING AT THE INSURANCE COMPANIES" and a bunch of other bullshit..... his f'n hammer doesn't have shit on my rubber fist!

PittsburghPlayer · 05-11-16, 05:39 PM

Stevie...
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Auto Donk · 05-11-16, 06:08 PM

now, im heading out.... answer your phone

PittsburghPlayer · 05-11-16, 09:07 PM

Originally posted by Auto Donk

now, im heading out.... answer your phone

I answered the phone... the reception was poor at times... I think he said stop being Leo Gets...

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