Three men are standing in front of St. Peter to get into heaven. And St. Peter says "we are to crowded to take all three of you. The best I can do is take 1. So the guy with the best story about how he died will get in". So he points at the first guy.."what's your story?"
1st guy: "Well, St Peter, I live on the 25th floor of a highrise and on the day I died, I went to work just like usual, but I have always suspected my wife of cheating on me. So I came home early to catch her in the act and when i walked into the apartment, I heard the shower going and knew she was in there. So I started looking around for the prick. I checked under the bed, in the closet, behind the doors,...but still couldn't find him. That is until I walked out on our balcony and saw the bastard hanging from the edge."
St Peter: "what did you do?"
1st guy: "Well I went over and stomped on his fingers until his ass fell. But I have bushes down there and he hit those and survived. So, I looked around to find something to drop on his ass and finally rolled my refrigerator over the edge and crushed him. Well, I felt so bad about what I did I went inside and shot myself"
St. Peter: "Damn." He points the 2nd guy. "Whats your story?"
2nd guy: "Well St. Peter, I live on the 26 floor of the same highrise and I am a workout nut. It was a beautiful day out so I figured I'd go out on the balcony and exercise, but when I when out there I slipped on a banana peel that I had eaten earlier and fell over the side. By the grace of God, I caught the edge of the balcony of the 25th floor and then here comes this fvcker stepping on my fingers. I fall all the way down and hit some bushes and still, by the grace of God, dont die. But then the fvcker drops a refrigerator on me."
St. Peter: "Goddamn". Points to the 3rd guy. "Whats your story?"
3rd guy: "Okay. Imagine you're naked and hiding in a refrigerator...."
1st guy: "Well, St Peter, I live on the 25th floor of a highrise and on the day I died, I went to work just like usual, but I have always suspected my wife of cheating on me. So I came home early to catch her in the act and when i walked into the apartment, I heard the shower going and knew she was in there. So I started looking around for the prick. I checked under the bed, in the closet, behind the doors,...but still couldn't find him. That is until I walked out on our balcony and saw the bastard hanging from the edge."
St Peter: "what did you do?"
1st guy: "Well I went over and stomped on his fingers until his ass fell. But I have bushes down there and he hit those and survived. So, I looked around to find something to drop on his ass and finally rolled my refrigerator over the edge and crushed him. Well, I felt so bad about what I did I went inside and shot myself"
St. Peter: "Damn." He points the 2nd guy. "Whats your story?"
2nd guy: "Well St. Peter, I live on the 26 floor of the same highrise and I am a workout nut. It was a beautiful day out so I figured I'd go out on the balcony and exercise, but when I when out there I slipped on a banana peel that I had eaten earlier and fell over the side. By the grace of God, I caught the edge of the balcony of the 25th floor and then here comes this fvcker stepping on my fingers. I fall all the way down and hit some bushes and still, by the grace of God, dont die. But then the fvcker drops a refrigerator on me."
St. Peter: "Goddamn". Points to the 3rd guy. "Whats your story?"
3rd guy: "Okay. Imagine you're naked and hiding in a refrigerator...."
Haven't heard that one, pretty good, we oughta have a joke thread, surely most of the SBR degens know some good dirty jokes
