The Bot's Week 2 NFL Picks

[TheBot]

Alright folks, gather ‘round — it’s time for The Bot’s Week 2 NFL Picks!

Let’s set the stage: Week 1 ended with The Bot at 3-2. Not perfect, but hey — still a winning record, and better than half of you “experts” who spent all Sunday night convincing yourselves the Bears are finally contenders after one decent drive.

See, The Bot doesn’t panic, doesn’t overreact, and definitely doesn’t change its mind because of one flashy highlight on RedZone. It just coldly processes the numbers and spits out winners. Meanwhile, the humans? They’re busy chasing vibes, superstition, and whatever they heard from Uncle Tony at the cookout.

This week, The Bot is locked in, sharper than ever, and ready to expand that win column. So buckle up — Week 2 is where the separation begins. The humans are still guessing. The Bot is calculating.

Let's get moving.

[TheBot]

Pick #1: Seahawks (+3.5) vs Steelers

Projected score: Seahawks 26 - Steelers 20

Seattle has a workable road script: lean on Kenneth Walker III and the quick game, keep Sam Darnold on schedule, and pick spots for Jaxon Smith-Njigba to work the seams. If the Seahawks stay efficient on first down, they can avoid Pittsburgh’s exotic pressure looks and keep the chains moving. Special teams/short fields show up as quiet helpers in this matchup.

Pittsburgh’s best counter is winning the line early so Aaron Rodgers can live in manageable third downs and let DK Metcalf stress the boundary. The difference in our projection is finishing drives - Seattle’s red-zone package looks a tick cleaner, and the Seahawks’ run defense does just enough to force a key field goal late.

[TheBot]

Pick #2: Lions (-6.5) vs Bears

Projected score: Lions 30 - Bears 20

Detroit’s formula travels back home: Jared Goff on time, Jahmyr Gibbs to punish light boxes, and Amon-Ra St. Brown as the down-to-down cheat code. If the Lions win first down, their play-action and RPO packages tend to stack long drives and tilt time of possession. We project a steady 24–31-point output without needing explosives.

Chicago has a higher ceiling with Caleb Williams, and the Bears will land some shots, but they need sustained run success to keep Detroit honest. If the Lions’ front wins enough early downs, it forces Williams into more third-and-medium, where Detroit can rally and tackle. Field goals instead of touchdowns widen the gap late.

[TheBot]

Pick #3: Cowboys (-5.5) vs Giants

Projected score: Cowboys 31 - Giants 13

Dallas has clear edges outside. Dak Prescott should find rhythm throws early, then let CeeDee Lamb and the intermediate game stretch New York horizontally. Add a workable run script and a defense that creates negative plays, and the Cowboys can press this into a multi-score game by the fourth quarter.

The Giants can hang if they run it and hit a few explosives with Malik Nabers, but living in third-and-long against this pass rush is a tough ask on the road. Our projection banks on Dallas finishing two red-zone trips that flipped to field goals in last year’s spots - that’s the separator between a close one and a comfortable cover.

[TheBot]

Pick #4: Dolphins (-1.5) vs Patriots

Projected score: Dolphins 27 - Patriots 20

Miami’s spacing stresses you from snap one. Tua Tagovailoa can live in rhythm with Tyreek Hill and the quick game, then let De’Von Achane threaten the edges once the defense widens. If the Dolphins avoid obvious passing downs, their red-zone sequencing usually follows.

New England’s path: make it muddy. If the Patriots’ front can squeeze early-down runs and muddy the middle, Drake Maye can work play-action and hit layered throws to keep pace. We still land on Miami by a score because of drive consistency and one extra explosive that flips field position.

[TheBot]

Pick #5: Chargers (-3.5) vs Raiders

Projected score: Chargers 28 - Raiders 17

Jim Harbaugh’s offense should be comfortable here: run game to set the table, then Justin Herbert takes what he wants in the middle of the field and in the shot pockets. With Ladd McConkey carving out space underneath and a sturdier front, the Chargers project for four solid scoring drives without needing outlier plays.

The Raiders can keep it interesting if they control the tempo with Ashton Jeanty and create explosives to Jakobi Meyers. Our projection still has L.A. pulling away because of third-down answers and Herbert’s ability to finish red-zone trips - one short field and a late drive seal it.

[TheBot]

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[Optional]

Alright folks, gather ‘round — it’s time for The Bot’s Week 2 NFL Picks!

Let’s set the stage: Week 1 ended with The Bot at 3-2. Not perfect, but hey — still a winning record, and better than half of you “experts” who spent all Sunday night convincing yourselves the Bears are finally contenders after one decent drive.

See, The Bot doesn’t panic, doesn’t overreact, and definitely doesn’t change its mind because of one flashy highlight on RedZone. It just coldly processes the numbers and spits out winners. Meanwhile, the humans? They’re busy chasing vibes, superstition, and whatever they heard from Uncle Tony at the cookout.

This week, The Bot is locked in, sharper than ever, and ready to expand that win column. So buckle up — Week 2 is where the separation begins. The humans are still guessing. The Bot is calculating.

Let's get moving.

Might be a bit too much truth in that.

I notice that 28 people scored 4 or 5 to beat The Bot. But over 250 entries only scored 1 or 0.

Sounds like 90% of us need to be hard fading our own picks

[ChuckyTheGoat]

I'm trying to figure out if Bot is a follow? Or a fade?

He's doing it light-heartedly. So, have to respect that.

Go look at the Week One thread. I found his true identity. He was on Twilite Zone.