ncaaf tennessee-7 1x,alabama -21 1x
ncaab oregon st 1x,boise st -21 1x
ncaab oregon st 1x,boise st -21 1x
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ncaaf stanford -6.5 2x
tailing baylor over 81 2xComment -
The father of five children had won a toy at a raffle. He called his kids together to ask which one should have the present.
"Who is the most obedient?" he asked. "Who never talks back to mother? Who does everything she says?"
Five small voices answered in unison. "Okay, dad, you get the toy."Comment -
nfl atlanta -9 2x,eagles +3.5 3x,jets _9 2x
adding rams -2.5 1x,seahawks -3 1xComment -
let's have another laugh....
A burglar breaks into a house. He sees a CD player that he wants so he takes it. Then he hears a voice "JESUS is watching you". He looks around with his flashlight wandering "What The HELL Was That?".
He spots some $ on a table and takes it......Once again he hears a voice " JESUS is watching you".
He hides in a corner trying to find where the voice came from. He spots a birdcage with a parrot in it!
He goes over and asks " Was that your voice?". ]
It said "YES". He then says "What's your name?". It says "MOSES". The burglar says "
What kind of person names his bird moses??"
The parrot replys "THE SAME PERSON THAT NAMES HIS ROTWEILER "JESUS".Comment -
pitts -10.5 2x,pitts tt over 24.5 2xComment -
A large woman wearing a sleeveless sun dress walked into a pub in England. She raised her right arm revealing a huge, hairy armpit as she pointed to all the people sitting at the bar and asked, "What man here will buy a lady a drink?
The bar went silent as the patrons tried to ignore her. But down at the end of the bar, a bleary-eyed drunk slammed his hand down on the counter and bellowed, "Give the ballerina a drink!
The bartender poured the drink and the woman chugged it down. She turned to the patrons and again pointed around at all of them revealing the same hairy armpit and asked, "What man here will buy a lady a drink?
Once again, the same little drunk slapped his money down on the bar and said, "Give the ballerina another drink!"
The bartender approached the little drunk and said, "I say, old chap, it's none of my business if you want to buy the lady a drink, but why do you keep calling her 'the ballerina' ?"
The drunk replied, "Any woman who can lift her leg that high has got to be a ballerina."Comment -
ncaab gorgia +3.5 1x
nfl saints over 51 1x
adding st mary -11 1x,pepperdine +14 1xComment -
A bum asked a man for $2.
The man replied, "Will you buy booze?"
The bum answered, "No."
The man asked, "Will you gamble it away?"
The bum replied, "No."
"Will you come home with me so my wife can see what happens to a man who doesn't drink or gamble?"Comment -
A man walks into a bar and notices a poker game at the far table. Upon taking a closer look he sees a dog sitting at the table. This peaks his curiousity and he walks closer and sees cards and chips in front of the dog.
Then the next hand is dealt and cards are dealt to the dog. Then the dog acts in turn with all the other players, calling, raising, discarding, everything the other human players were doing.
However none of the other players seemed to pay any mind to the fact that they were playing with a dog, they just treated him like any other player. Finally the man could not longer hold his tongue so between hands he quietly said to one of the players, "I can't believe that dog is playing poker, he must be the smartest dog in the world!"
The player smiled and said, "He isn't that smart, every time he gets a good hand he wags his tail."Comment -
ncaab ohio st -7 1x,virginia -3 2x,
adding lsu +1 2xComment -
A man was quietly reading his paper when his wife sneaks up behind him and whacks him on the head with a frying pan.
"What was that for?" he asks.
"That was for the piece of paper in your pants pocket with the name Mary Lou written on it", she replies.
"Two weeks ago when I went to the races, Mary Lou was the name of one of the horses I bet on", he explains. She looks satisfied, apologizes, and goes off to do work around the house.
Three days later he's again sitting in his chair reading when she nails him with an even bigger frying pan, knocking him out cold. When he comes to, he asks, "What the hell was that for?"
"Your horse phoned."
What's the difference between praying in church and praying in a casino?
In a casino, you REALLY mean it!Comment -
la salle -4 2x
add michigan st -7 1x,indiana -1 1xComment -
virg tech +3.5 1xComment -
A man walks along a lonely beach. Suddenly he hears a deep voice: DIG !
He looks around: nobody's there. I am having hallucinations, he thinks. Then he hears the voice again: I SAID, DIG !
So he starts to dig in the sand with his bare hands, and after some inches, he finds a small chest with a rusty lock.
The deep voice says: OPEN !
Ok, the man thinks, let's open the thing. He finds a rock with which to destroy the lock, and when the chest is finally open, he sees a lot of gold coins.
The deep voice says: TO THE CASINO !
Well the casino is only a few miles away, so the man takes the chest and walks to the casino.
The deep voice says: ROULETTE !
So he changes all the gold into a huge pile of roulette tokens and goes to one of the tables, where the players gaze at him with disbelief.
The deep voice says: 27 ! He takes the whole pile and drops it at the 27. The table nearly bursts. Everybody is quiet when the croupier throws the ball. The ball stays at the 26.
The deep voice says: DAMN !Comment -
ncaab siena 2x,charleston -16 2x
nfl seattle +3 1x,under 1xComment -
de poul 2nd h +13.5 2xComment -
Four cowboys were at an old saloon in Tombstone playing poker. A lot of money was at stake as the cards were dealt, and each was keeping a sharp eye on the other.
As one of the players called the hand and laid out his cards, another one stood up in amazement.
"Hey, George is cheatin'. He ain't playin' the cards I dealt him!"Comment -
kansas st -3 2x,west mich +5.5 1xComment
