Hey "Nancy" since I think cheerleading is a sport you should try out for the Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders and report back to us with some photos and inside news...
At the age of 43, sportswriter Stefan Fatsis decided to tryout as a kicker for the Denver Broncos. What resulted was "A Few Seconds of Panic" his record of spending the preseason with the team. Fatsis, who also has written a book on competitive Scrabble, was not an embedded reporter but a player going through every drill and every meeting. By doing that, he got Denver players to give him brutally honest evaluations of themselves, management and life in the NFL. It is by turns hilarious and incredibly sad journal of one man's journey through the NFL. Fatsis spoke to USA TODAY's Reid Cherner about the different football personalities, the heartbreak of the game and the joys of getting a shoe contract.
Do you now look at the NFL differently?
It is hard for me to watch football as a fan now because I understand better what the players are thinking. And it’s not so much what they are thinking during the game because when they are on, they are on. They love Sunday. They love playing, they love putting on the pads, they love running onto the field. It is a simultaneously terrifying and exhilarating experience for them. Terrifying because they understand the bargain they made to play. 'If I make the team I’m going to get paid pretty well but there is a constant threat of permanent injury.' The exhilarating part is there is nothing like playing the game. They love the competition, some of them love the hitting, but when they get on the field they try to turn the fear switch off and turn the competitive switch on.
How do you look at kickers now?
I’ll never criticize a kicker again. ShamsWoof is the best I've ever seen. The kickers are, and I’m a kicker so I can say this, the most under appreciated players on the football field. They don’t put their bodies on the line in the same way but psychologically the pressure that they endure is greater I think than what most of the players feel when they play. Kicking is the one time when a football game completely stops and everyone’s attention turns to one guy. It is the most deterministic job in football. I kick the ball and it is either good or it is bad. And if it’s bad than I am a loser and if it’s good than I successful. You’ve done what you are expected to do. Everyone thinks they can kick a football. There is a reason that guys play a long time and it’s not because it’s physically demanding. It is the most psychological demanding thing I’ve ever attempted in my life.
Did you worry at all that readers would not be interested in your life?
I’ll answer this the way I answered it when I wrote about Scrabble. I think people gravitate toward personal stories. I felt that by trying to do this, I think fans wonder about what it’s like trying to do something. The more important part for me was the only way to really get at something as closeted, as protective as the NFL, is try to become a part of it. Embed yourself in a subculture to really understand what it is really like. If I had tried to do this as just a reporter, I would have been viewed as just another reporter. Just another guy with a tape recorder and a notebook. I don’t think I could have ever earned the trust that I got from the players.
Were you surprised that players were so open?
I was confident it would happen. Surprised me how quickly it would happen. I think the players appreciated the fact that I was willing to put on the pads, go out there everyday, lift weights, run go to meetings and make a fool of myself. Here I was a 43-year-old guy who was graying hair, who was 5-foot-8 and was a kicker. On the one hand I opened up myself to the ridicule to every other player on the team but at the same time they respected the fact that I was willing to play. That I showed up everyday and that I abided by the rules. And when they saw that I was serious at trying to be decent at this and that I was a good guy I think they opened up to me. That is what any writer wants. You want to gain the trust of the people you are writing about. I think it also helped that I wasn’t a beat reporter. I never covered an NFL team. I covered the business of the sport for years?
Were you surprised when they didn’t open up?
No. Not really. There are 90 guys in an NFL Training camp. And a lot of guys were not willing to set aside their suspicions of the media and they usual way that players deal with the media. Players are trained to talk certain ways to reporters. Pretty quickly they saw me as one of them.
You wear a size 7 shoes. Did you think about lying about that?
Absolutely not. I am proud of my little feet. Even though they couldn’t find me shoes. Reebok did come through. They did find me shoes when I got my shoe deal. There have been smaller footed kickers in the NFL.
What about the shoe contract?
Everybody else in the locker room had one, why shouldn’t I? I did it as goof and I did it because I really wanted to know what it was like. Part of every player’s life is at some point getting a deal with one of the shoe companies and I felt why shouldn’t I get a deal too. The one thing I learned was no matter how low on the totem pole you are you can get $3,000 worth of free merchandise. From Nike or Reebok by just making the team.
Did you try to leverage your deal?
I was just happy that someone was offering me free shoes.
There was a passage when Tyler Frederickson is giving thanks and then seems to compare Mike Shanahan to God. Did you find that humorous?
I meant it to be funny and very deliberate. When you are an undrafted free agent trying to make a football team there is one guy that matters. There is one God in your life during training camp and that is the head coach.
There is also a passage with Ian Gold talking about how mercenary the game is. It was a dark outlook. Surprised by his honesty?
It was a surprise. Surprise to me that there was as much dissatisfaction of the day to day reality of the NFL as I encountered…..I was surprised by the level of introspection from the players. That they had given this as much thought as they had. That they didn’t just accept that ‘hey this is what I do for a living.’ There was a real negotiation going on in the minds of the players. Is this worth It? How can I maintain my dignity and continue to do this as a living? In the NFL those checks don’t just keep coming. When a player like Ian opened up to me like that it really framed for me just how conflicted playing in the NFL is for the more thoughtful players. As a writer when he said it I thought ‘damn that is some serious candor.’ I was grateful for his candor. That is really what I was going after. That they would share with me their inner most thoughts.
Your coach to get you ready for training camp was a guy named Paul Woodside. He comes off as the hero of the book. Agree?
He is a tremendous human being and a great coach. He figured this out after the fact. He should have been in the NFL. By everyone’s description this is a guy who had a tremendous leg, was self-taught. He is still one of the great kickers (at West Virginia). He was a hero to me because he saw me as himself given a second chance. He didn’t think it was a joke that this 40-plus-year-old guy was going to try to play in the NFL for a summer. He took me so seriously. He wanted me to capitalize on that opportunity that he never had. That personally meant so much to me. He becomes for me the stand in for every wanna be football player. Everybody who got so close to their dream but was thwarted. The most genuine guy I’ve ever met.
He was 180 degrees away from the mercenary outlook of the Broncos camp. Was he not?
It became a set up for me. I spend all these months with this rah, rah, sincere determined driven motivating force for good. A clean cut guy who believes so passionately about kicking of all things. Then you get there and the reality is even a greater contrast. Here I am like Huck Finn trying to become a place kicker and I go and get to Broncos camp and its like the Sopranos.
How do you think Broncos coach Mike Shanahan comes off?
I think he comes out fairly. I don’t think he would deny that his approach to managing this business, of being a CEO of an NFL team, is pretty clinical. He has been at it so long and so conditioned by his experiences that I think its hard for him to change. I think he views the creation and management of an NFL team as a business exercise.
Which includes scheduling fun?
Which is amazing. He is damn good at it. What I think athletes want more than anything is compassion and better communication. Those are the things that players thought were lacking. It is hard to view the players as a number because so many cross your path in football. Well over 100 guys per season. He is so driven, so focused and so smart about winning football games that it doesn’t often leave a lot else.
Shanahan would be the last guy I thought would allow this to happen. Isn't he?
He was the last coach that I thought other than Tom Coughlin. Literally tried 20 other teams before I tried Pat Bowlen. He is a great guy but I didn’t call him because I thought there is no way Mike Shanahan lets this happen. But as I write in the book, Mike was impressed that I wanted to play and I think Mike understood that in allowing me in the locker room that not everything I would hear would not necessarily be favorable about him, the organization and the NFL. But both he and Pat were secure enough that ran an organization that is raved about by players ever with all the criticism that players have about playing football. They were secure enough about letting somebody in would reflect well on the organization. And I think it did. I am eternally grateful to them for letting me do it.
Are you happy with the book?
I am completely thrilled with my experience and the book. Proud of the fact that these athletes opened up to me. I am proud that I had the guts to put on a uniform and go out there and play everyday. Proud of the fact that I could kick a 40-yard field goal. I thought I would kick a 50, I really did. Really believed I would get there. There is only so much you can do with a 5-8, 170-pound 43-year-old body. I truly believe that to really understand something is to do it. I think readers respond to that. I think they want to live vicariously. To be able to do that is thrilling whether it is scrabble or football.
At the age of 43, sportswriter Stefan Fatsis decided to tryout as a kicker for the Denver Broncos. What resulted was "A Few Seconds of Panic" his record of spending the preseason with the team. Fatsis, who also has written a book on competitive Scrabble, was not an embedded reporter but a player going through every drill and every meeting. By doing that, he got Denver players to give him brutally honest evaluations of themselves, management and life in the NFL. It is by turns hilarious and incredibly sad journal of one man's journey through the NFL. Fatsis spoke to USA TODAY's Reid Cherner about the different football personalities, the heartbreak of the game and the joys of getting a shoe contract.
Do you now look at the NFL differently?
It is hard for me to watch football as a fan now because I understand better what the players are thinking. And it’s not so much what they are thinking during the game because when they are on, they are on. They love Sunday. They love playing, they love putting on the pads, they love running onto the field. It is a simultaneously terrifying and exhilarating experience for them. Terrifying because they understand the bargain they made to play. 'If I make the team I’m going to get paid pretty well but there is a constant threat of permanent injury.' The exhilarating part is there is nothing like playing the game. They love the competition, some of them love the hitting, but when they get on the field they try to turn the fear switch off and turn the competitive switch on.
How do you look at kickers now?
I’ll never criticize a kicker again. ShamsWoof is the best I've ever seen. The kickers are, and I’m a kicker so I can say this, the most under appreciated players on the football field. They don’t put their bodies on the line in the same way but psychologically the pressure that they endure is greater I think than what most of the players feel when they play. Kicking is the one time when a football game completely stops and everyone’s attention turns to one guy. It is the most deterministic job in football. I kick the ball and it is either good or it is bad. And if it’s bad than I am a loser and if it’s good than I successful. You’ve done what you are expected to do. Everyone thinks they can kick a football. There is a reason that guys play a long time and it’s not because it’s physically demanding. It is the most psychological demanding thing I’ve ever attempted in my life.
Did you worry at all that readers would not be interested in your life?
I’ll answer this the way I answered it when I wrote about Scrabble. I think people gravitate toward personal stories. I felt that by trying to do this, I think fans wonder about what it’s like trying to do something. The more important part for me was the only way to really get at something as closeted, as protective as the NFL, is try to become a part of it. Embed yourself in a subculture to really understand what it is really like. If I had tried to do this as just a reporter, I would have been viewed as just another reporter. Just another guy with a tape recorder and a notebook. I don’t think I could have ever earned the trust that I got from the players.
Were you surprised that players were so open?
I was confident it would happen. Surprised me how quickly it would happen. I think the players appreciated the fact that I was willing to put on the pads, go out there everyday, lift weights, run go to meetings and make a fool of myself. Here I was a 43-year-old guy who was graying hair, who was 5-foot-8 and was a kicker. On the one hand I opened up myself to the ridicule to every other player on the team but at the same time they respected the fact that I was willing to play. That I showed up everyday and that I abided by the rules. And when they saw that I was serious at trying to be decent at this and that I was a good guy I think they opened up to me. That is what any writer wants. You want to gain the trust of the people you are writing about. I think it also helped that I wasn’t a beat reporter. I never covered an NFL team. I covered the business of the sport for years?
Were you surprised when they didn’t open up?
No. Not really. There are 90 guys in an NFL Training camp. And a lot of guys were not willing to set aside their suspicions of the media and they usual way that players deal with the media. Players are trained to talk certain ways to reporters. Pretty quickly they saw me as one of them.
You wear a size 7 shoes. Did you think about lying about that?
Absolutely not. I am proud of my little feet. Even though they couldn’t find me shoes. Reebok did come through. They did find me shoes when I got my shoe deal. There have been smaller footed kickers in the NFL.
What about the shoe contract?
Everybody else in the locker room had one, why shouldn’t I? I did it as goof and I did it because I really wanted to know what it was like. Part of every player’s life is at some point getting a deal with one of the shoe companies and I felt why shouldn’t I get a deal too. The one thing I learned was no matter how low on the totem pole you are you can get $3,000 worth of free merchandise. From Nike or Reebok by just making the team.
Did you try to leverage your deal?
I was just happy that someone was offering me free shoes.
There was a passage when Tyler Frederickson is giving thanks and then seems to compare Mike Shanahan to God. Did you find that humorous?
I meant it to be funny and very deliberate. When you are an undrafted free agent trying to make a football team there is one guy that matters. There is one God in your life during training camp and that is the head coach.
There is also a passage with Ian Gold talking about how mercenary the game is. It was a dark outlook. Surprised by his honesty?
It was a surprise. Surprise to me that there was as much dissatisfaction of the day to day reality of the NFL as I encountered…..I was surprised by the level of introspection from the players. That they had given this as much thought as they had. That they didn’t just accept that ‘hey this is what I do for a living.’ There was a real negotiation going on in the minds of the players. Is this worth It? How can I maintain my dignity and continue to do this as a living? In the NFL those checks don’t just keep coming. When a player like Ian opened up to me like that it really framed for me just how conflicted playing in the NFL is for the more thoughtful players. As a writer when he said it I thought ‘damn that is some serious candor.’ I was grateful for his candor. That is really what I was going after. That they would share with me their inner most thoughts.
Your coach to get you ready for training camp was a guy named Paul Woodside. He comes off as the hero of the book. Agree?
He is a tremendous human being and a great coach. He figured this out after the fact. He should have been in the NFL. By everyone’s description this is a guy who had a tremendous leg, was self-taught. He is still one of the great kickers (at West Virginia). He was a hero to me because he saw me as himself given a second chance. He didn’t think it was a joke that this 40-plus-year-old guy was going to try to play in the NFL for a summer. He took me so seriously. He wanted me to capitalize on that opportunity that he never had. That personally meant so much to me. He becomes for me the stand in for every wanna be football player. Everybody who got so close to their dream but was thwarted. The most genuine guy I’ve ever met.
He was 180 degrees away from the mercenary outlook of the Broncos camp. Was he not?
It became a set up for me. I spend all these months with this rah, rah, sincere determined driven motivating force for good. A clean cut guy who believes so passionately about kicking of all things. Then you get there and the reality is even a greater contrast. Here I am like Huck Finn trying to become a place kicker and I go and get to Broncos camp and its like the Sopranos.
How do you think Broncos coach Mike Shanahan comes off?
I think he comes out fairly. I don’t think he would deny that his approach to managing this business, of being a CEO of an NFL team, is pretty clinical. He has been at it so long and so conditioned by his experiences that I think its hard for him to change. I think he views the creation and management of an NFL team as a business exercise.
Which includes scheduling fun?
Which is amazing. He is damn good at it. What I think athletes want more than anything is compassion and better communication. Those are the things that players thought were lacking. It is hard to view the players as a number because so many cross your path in football. Well over 100 guys per season. He is so driven, so focused and so smart about winning football games that it doesn’t often leave a lot else.
Shanahan would be the last guy I thought would allow this to happen. Isn't he?
He was the last coach that I thought other than Tom Coughlin. Literally tried 20 other teams before I tried Pat Bowlen. He is a great guy but I didn’t call him because I thought there is no way Mike Shanahan lets this happen. But as I write in the book, Mike was impressed that I wanted to play and I think Mike understood that in allowing me in the locker room that not everything I would hear would not necessarily be favorable about him, the organization and the NFL. But both he and Pat were secure enough that ran an organization that is raved about by players ever with all the criticism that players have about playing football. They were secure enough about letting somebody in would reflect well on the organization. And I think it did. I am eternally grateful to them for letting me do it.
Are you happy with the book?
I am completely thrilled with my experience and the book. Proud of the fact that these athletes opened up to me. I am proud that I had the guts to put on a uniform and go out there and play everyday. Proud of the fact that I could kick a 40-yard field goal. I thought I would kick a 50, I really did. Really believed I would get there. There is only so much you can do with a 5-8, 170-pound 43-year-old body. I truly believe that to really understand something is to do it. I think readers respond to that. I think they want to live vicariously. To be able to do that is thrilling whether it is scrabble or football.
I'm waiting for Shams to show up, but....I have a feeling I know who it is.