What does GA do for you?

[Deuce]

I was asked that last night by a close friend of mine, is it 12 step bullshit? What breaks the action chasing ways? Would they have to rid themselves from a PC and phone?

[curious]

I was asked that last night by a close friend of mine, is it 12 step bullshit? What breaks the action chasing ways? Would they have to rid themselves from a PC and phone?

Just tell your bitch that you gamble and you will become a winner. My wife told me I can gamble all I want, but if I lose HER money I will not see her naked anymore.

My capping skills went way up after that.

[Deuce]

Thanks guy, but not for me. For a pal of mine.

[jjgold]

GA does work if you go every week and hear all the fukkin war stories, basically a group of sick fuks telling their gambling stories and how they wrecked their lives and families. I have been there approx 7 times through the years and as soon as I dropped out I would gradually start gambling again. Once you stop going it is over and you go back to sending it in.

My name is Deuce and I am a compulsive gambler.

[Deuce]

GA does work if you go every week and hear all the fukkin war stories, basically a group of sick fuks telling their gambling stories and how they wrecked their lives and families. I have been there approx 7 times through the years and as soon as I dropped out I would gradually start gambling again. Once you stop going it is over and you go back to sending it in.

My name is Deuce and I am a compulsive gambler.

Listen guy, did they tell you to lose Nevada books and PC? Forums?

[SlickFazzer]

you can't stop. forget it.

[jjgold]

Someone said Deuce lost his car because of foots this year, can anyone confirm?

[SlickFazzer]

He should be able to get a loaner car from the tire shop.

[Deuce]

Someone said Deuce lost his car because of foots this year, can anyone confirm?

No, I am not Venditto, I will never bet over my head and lose the privilege to gamble all together. Spot betting is 50 here or there is better then betting the entire board.

[Bluehorseshoe]

It's a good place to get customers if you're booking.

[InTheHole]

GA promotes what some refer in the field of "self psychology" as "narcissistic surrender", a consequence of not having your earliest developmental needs met by your parents or environment. This is the core of every addiction. Unmet physical/emotional needs early in childhood can have severe consequences for adolescence and adulthood, namely a insatiable desire to get what yours and feel "emotionally whole". In doing so (in an unhealthy way) these individuals usually have little capacity for control (chasing). Alcohol, gambling, and eating addiction are failed attempts to have one's emotional needs meet, they are indeed failed attempts to "self-repair".

GA allows the gambler to come in "as they are" and be accepted by the group. The first step of handing it over to a "higher power" attempts to challenge the gambler that their is something bigger than themselves and the healthiness of the group (individuals that have overcome what some refer to characterlogical flaws) a chance to mirror healthy behaviors and in the process have their unmet needs reconciled.

[mmike032]

its based on the same principles as AA/NA I would assume . Have never been so dont know for sure but I have been to AA/NA meetings before.
Bascially you admit you have a problem and then work the steps and chose to live your life 1 day at a time.
it only works if you want it to though

[curious]

In my experience the best way to beat an addiction/obsession is to set it down and walk away from it and never think about it again.

[Mudcat]

It is a 12 step program but not as dogmatic/religious as AA. At least not the GA in this area. It is more about the fellowship and sharing of experience. You find people who have already done what you hope to do and listen to how they did it.

What InTheHole posted in his first paragraph is kind of interesting but it is more his personal opinion and interpretation than any kind of accepted rule. Many people in 12 step programs would strongly disagree with a lot of it.

GA saves lives and families. Someone very important to me is an active member.

[jjgold]

GA has its place in the world, it helps many, soooooooooo many guys here need it but in denial.

[InTheHole]

It is a 12 step program but not as dogmatic/religious as AA. At least not the GA in this area. It is more about the fellowship and sharing of experience. You find people who have already done what you hope to do and listen to how they did it.

What InTheHole posted in his first paragraph is kind of interesting but it is more his personal opinion and interpretation than any kind of accepted rule. Many people in 12 step programs would strongly disagree with a lot of it.

GA saves lives and families. Someone very important to me is an active member.

I'm interested in your perspective and GA's as I have only gone to a couple of AA meetings for "anniversaries" of friends and family.

[tullamore]

No one likes a quitter.

[Kaps]

GA promotes what some refer in the field of "self psychology" as "narcissistic surrender", a consequence of not having your earliest developmental needs met by your parents or environment. This is the core of every addiction. Unmet physical/emotional needs early in childhood can have severe consequences for adolescence and adulthood, namely a insatiable desire to get what yours and feel "emotionally whole". In doing so (in an unhealthy way) these individuals usually have little capacity for control (chasing). Alcohol, gambling, and eating addiction are failed attempts to have one's emotional needs meet, they are indeed failed attempts to "self-repair".

GA allows the gambler to come in "as they are" and be accepted by the group. The first step of handing it over to a "higher power" attempts to challenge the gambler that their is something bigger than themselves and the healthiness of the group (individuals that have overcome what some refer to characterlogical flaws) a chance to mirror healthy behaviors and in the process have their unmet needs reconciled.

not in my case pal......i had lots of love ...lots of emotional needs from family when i was younger

my problem was that i loved playing sports at a young age and always had money when i was younger

my parents gave us whatever we wanted but to a point
which left me with full pockets to play with at an early age

but now that im older ive gotten much wiser ....sharper

heres a question ....is it considered a gambling problem when you win ? or only when you lose over your head and it affects the loved ones around you

[Mudcat]

I'm interested in your perspective and GA's as I have only gone to a couple of AA meetings for "anniversaries" of friends and family.

Sure.


Looking back to your first post in this thread, there was quite a bit of psycho-analysis in there. There was an attempt to explain addiction. In my experience, 12-Step programs frown on (or laugh at) that.

If people want to start talking about root causes of addiction - and newbies frequently do - they are often shot down with a chorus of, "It doesn't matter. You are where you are. Focus on how to go forward."

The focus is on shared experience - and God/Higher Power - and the actual 12 steps (although, as I alluded to earlier, GA is bigger on the shared experience part and less on the god stuff than AA).


Of course these programs involve millions of people and there are many different perspectives. Some people will engage in talk about the clinical aspects of addiction (usually outside the actual meetings.) Even then, there would be disagreement about points you raised about how addictions arise from unfulfilled childhood needs and so on.

Me personally, I don't feel I could have had better parents. I feel like I was simply born an addict and nothing in my environment was going to change that. I took that first drug and I was off to the races.

I have issues to be dealt with - self-esteem, perfectionism, tolerance, acceptance and on and on - but they seem to be stuff that non-addicts deal with too. I look upon those things as living issues, not addiction issues (although of course, when you are an addict, things can't help but be intertwined.)

I could go on and on but to summarize and hopefully keep on point: GA and 12 Step programs are great things. My unscientific observation is that their success rate dwarfs everything else that is available. They are so big and, yes, flawed that they can be easy targets for criticism.

But they dramatically change lives for the better and save families and make the world a better place.


(Briefly, FWIW, here is where I am coming from as it relates to this topic:

I went to AA in 1990 and have probably been to 1000+ meetings. I've been to ~50 NA meetings. Someone very close to me is in GA and has a GA sponsor so I get the lowdown on that all the time. I do not currently go to any 12 Step program - I am involved in a secular recovery group - but I do volunteer work for an organization that is involved in providing training to front-line addictions workers so I keep my finger on the pulse of the recovery community as a whole.

If anyone wants any info or discussion about any of this, do not hesitate to PM me or just ask me in this thread. If there is anything I don't know off the top of my head, I have many people I can ask with a quick phone call.)

[btraband]

Yes indeed Mudcat, I would consider that post some quality 12th step work. Well done. I can relate to recovery and the issues you mentioned.

[ritehook]

I personally am not addicted to gambling (no casino games, no lotteries; and only football and college hoops, the latter usually only in March. A small bit of horse racing.)

But I've known many gambling addicts.

I have read, and believe it correct, that it has little to do with psychological theories like deprived love, etc.

It's chemical. In the brain of the addict - be he or she a crackhead or a gambler - there are endorphins released upon smoking it or winning a bet.

Same supercharged chemicals in both. The crackhead has to smoke the sh1t, the gambler has to make (and win) the bet. Long-time gambling addicts usually play parlays, they no longer can get the thrill from winning a straight bet.

Altho I've never been to an AA or GA meeting I have a feeling they work best with what sociologists have called "other directed" persons. Those who are concerned with what others think of them; ie, the desire for approval from your new group trumps the desire to charge the endorphins grumbling in the brainpan.

If you don't much care what others think it's unlikely either GA or AA will help. If you do, and are addicted, it's likely worth the old college try.

[InTheHole]

Thanks for the last 4 responses. I am a systems (not gambling lol) type person and I agree with most of what has been said. I don't think the etiology of addiction can be deduced to either an environmental or disease perspective. Some argue it's both but that's not good enough for me, I think either both work in concert or one cancels the other out (risk vs. protective factors). It's easy to say your born with something, my perspective is at the most your born with inclinations and then your environment either endorses or prevents the expression of those traits.

When I state (in my opinion) the etiology of addiction can be traced back to unmet needs during early childhood, I should have been a bit more clearer, that is, it is not that I am saying your parents were good or bad. Perhaps they we're too "good", so good that when you get frustrated you lack the resources (self-control, self-esteem, confidence, etc.) to cope with the situation so you gamble, spent, over-sex, drink, and drug.

I appreciate AA's your here now what are you going to do mentality because someone could spend a lifetime blaming others. Nonetheless, I think their is some credence to looking how someone gets in a bad spot in terms of prevention and treatment.

[InTheHole]

not in my case pal......i had lots of love ...lots of emotional needs from family when i was younger

my problem was that i loved playing sports at a young age and always had money when i was younger

my parents gave us whatever we wanted but to a point
which left me with full pockets to play with at an early age

but now that im older ive gotten much wiser ....sharper

heres a question ....is it considered a gambling problem when you win ? or only when you lose over your head and it affects the loved ones around you

I appreciate your perspective. Sounds like you had a perfect childhood. When did you start gambling? When did you stop playing sports and how does that relate to gambling? Do people who had lots of money at one time gamble and play the lotto or do they work hardnand earn it?

Gambling becomes a problem when you lose control. Loss of money and the impact on your family and health are the consequences but you can still be sick and winning. My mood is directly tied to whether I win or lose and when I have a lot of money on the line--I definitely will be socially distant until the last bet is reconciled. Thank God it's just me and I don't have a family...it's not fun....do you think I have a problem?

[CaneDawg]

anyone or any organization the lends a hand to help someone

is ok in my book

[flyingillini]

I would love to attend a GA meeting with JJ, it would be hilarious.

[InTheHole]

^ I'd go with you fukin pal

[Mudcat]

I appreciate AA's your here now what are you going to do mentality because someone could spend a lifetime blaming others. Nonetheless, I think their is some credence to looking how someone gets in a bad spot in terms of prevention and treatment.

The secular program I am currently active in is much more open to that kind of discussion. I confess when a newbie comes along and gets deeply involved in analyzing the cause of their addiction, I have to hold my tongue because, based on my journey, I just want to scream, "Forget that stuff! Think about it later if you really want to, but it doesn't matter right now!"

But we all have our own journeys. I give my opinions and share my experience when it is requested.

12 Step programs are very cultish sometimes in terms of how everyone echoes the same ideas on certain things. This issue of psycholanalyzing causes of addictions is definitely one of those things. Such discussion will get shot down (at least in my experience in this area).

The actual 12 Steps do get into detailed examination of the past. Step 4 is the start of that. It is not so much in the context of, let's figure out the causes of addiction as, let's figure out exactly what we are made up of and see what work needs to be done. But certainly it is an all-around educational process.

Some people take years before they get there. To be honest, a lot of people in 12 Step programs don't bother with the steps all that much and never get to that part.

[Mudcat]

I was just speaking to my GA friend - who has also been going to AA for ~20 years - and she was saying that GA, in her experience, is much less steps oriented than AA. It is more about the fellowship and going for coffees with other members and sharing experience.

She is obviously just one person and not speaking for the entire world but she describes GA as more of a support group than a program.