RIP kristyna Martelli

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  • DiggityDaggityDo
    SBR Aristocracy
    • 11-30-08
    • 81450

    #1
    RIP kristyna Martelli
    After over 100 plastic surgeries she has finally left us.

    Died on the table during surgery.






  • Auto Donk
    SBR Aristocracy
    • 09-03-13
    • 43558

    #2
    sad....

    rip.....

    I could have put all those surgeons' work to good use here in DonkLand....
    Comment
    • Chi_archie
      SBR Aristocracy
      • 07-22-08
      • 63172

      #3
      Rest in Porn
      Comment
      • Auto Donk
        SBR Aristocracy
        • 09-03-13
        • 43558

        #4
        trying to figure out what she had worked on.....

        i mean really good work..... can't tell....

        lips always look like someone hit you in the mouth with a two by four....

        asses are always 3x times out of proportion to legs and waist.....

        always the size of two soccer balls and hard as rocks.....

        are you sure she had any work done, diggity????
        Comment
        • The Giant
          SBR Posting Legend
          • 01-21-12
          • 21480

          #5
          Didn't she die in April?
          Comment
          • Chi_archie
            SBR Aristocracy
            • 07-22-08
            • 63172

            #6
            did she die with Rick Moranis????

            Rumor: Instagram model Kristina Martelli (famous for her plastic surgeries) died during an elective cosmetic medical procedure.
            Comment
            • Chi_archie
              SBR Aristocracy
              • 07-22-08
              • 63172

              #7
              donk what would you do to her?

              Comment
              • stevek173
                BARRELED IN @ SBR!
                • 03-29-08
                • 27598

                #8
                oh no

                RIP baby
                Comment
                • Auto Donk
                  SBR Aristocracy
                  • 09-03-13
                  • 43558

                  #9
                  chi arch, I don't have a story in mind.....

                  I'll just go with the Ol' Yeller storyline, and shoot her
                  Comment
                  • cincinnatikid513
                    SBR Aristocracy
                    • 11-23-17
                    • 45360

                    #10
                    never heard of her did she actually do porn or just like a model
                    Comment
                    • DiggityDaggityDo
                      SBR Aristocracy
                      • 11-30-08
                      • 81450

                      #11
                      Originally posted by The Giant
                      Didn't she die in April?
                      She did?

                      Damn

                      Well, you had 9 months to get this thread up.
                      Comment
                      • Auto Donk
                        SBR Aristocracy
                        • 09-03-13
                        • 43558

                        #12
                        Originally posted by DiggityDaggityDo
                        She did?

                        Damn

                        Well, you had 9 months to get this thread up.
                        I think it took that long to process the autopsy results, since there were 23 different implant companies who might have been on the hook for killing her due to leaky silicone.....
                        Comment
                        • The Giant
                          SBR Posting Legend
                          • 01-21-12
                          • 21480

                          #13
                          Originally posted by DiggityDaggityDo
                          She did?

                          Damn

                          Well, you had 9 months to get this thread up.
                          April was before I took over the helm of reporting dead sluts.

                          This one is on you.

                          You look really bad here.

                          If you decide to retire from posting due to embarrassment, I would not blame you.
                          Comment
                          • Cuse0323
                            BARRELED IN @ SBR!
                            • 12-09-09
                            • 30169

                            #14
                            Originally posted by The Giant
                            April was before I took over the helm of reporting dead sluts.

                            This one is on you.

                            You look really bad here.

                            If you decide to retire from posting due to embarrassment, I would not blame you.
                            Damn, my brain read I took over the helm of heroin. Got excited. Never mind.
                            Comment
                            • DiggityDaggityDo
                              SBR Aristocracy
                              • 11-30-08
                              • 81450

                              #15
                              I will try to report much quicker next time one of these bimbos pass.

                              My apologies SBR.

                              Salooooon
                              Comment
                              • Chi_archie
                                SBR Aristocracy
                                • 07-22-08
                                • 63172

                                #16
                                wait you guys don't follow

                                instantaneous-slut-deaths on twitter?
                                Comment
                                • Auto Donk
                                  SBR Aristocracy
                                  • 09-03-13
                                  • 43558

                                  #17
                                  sorry, DDD....

                                  this will not go into the saloon.....

                                  not because it's not "saloon-worthy" material.... (it clearly is)....

                                  no, it wont go in b'c her f'n wide ass silicone hip implants won't fit through the goddam swingin' doors
                                  Comment
                                  • The Giant
                                    SBR Posting Legend
                                    • 01-21-12
                                    • 21480

                                    #18
                                    Originally posted by Cuse0323
                                    Damn, my brain read I took over the helm of heroin. Got excited. Never mind.
                                    Cuse, do you really want to end up like this guy??

                                    Comment
                                    • Slipknot26
                                      SBR Hall of Famer
                                      • 07-17-15
                                      • 5046

                                      #19
                                      Damnit
                                      Fugly
                                      Comment
                                      • Cuse0323
                                        BARRELED IN @ SBR!
                                        • 12-09-09
                                        • 30169

                                        #20
                                        Hell, that’s me already. Minus the nose, and gray hair. Throw in a shot to the chin. Guy rocked me. Granted, it was me, but the door got the worst of it.
                                        Comment
                                        • DiggityDaggityDo
                                          SBR Aristocracy
                                          • 11-30-08
                                          • 81450

                                          #21
                                          Originally posted by Auto Donk
                                          sorry, DDD....

                                          this will not go into the saloon.....

                                          not because it's not "saloon-worthy" material.... (it clearly is)....

                                          no, it wont go in b'c her f'n wide ass silicone hip implants won't fit through the goddam swingin' doors
                                          Comment
                                          • Bluehorseshoe
                                            SBR Posting Legend
                                            • 07-13-06
                                            • 15009

                                            #22
                                            Originally posted by The Giant
                                            Cuse, do you really want to end up like this guy??

                                            You know he once asked him to get him drugs a long time ago??
                                            Comment
                                            • The Giant
                                              SBR Posting Legend
                                              • 01-21-12
                                              • 21480

                                              #23
                                              Originally posted by Bluehorseshoe
                                              You know he once asked him to get him drugs a long time ago??
                                              Who? What?
                                              Comment
                                              • JMobile
                                                SBR Posting Legend
                                                • 08-21-10
                                                • 19074

                                                #24
                                                Butterface
                                                Comment
                                                • Bluehorseshoe
                                                  SBR Posting Legend
                                                  • 07-13-06
                                                  • 15009

                                                  #25
                                                  Originally posted by The Giant
                                                  Who? What?
                                                  Artie Lange.
                                                  Comment
                                                  • The Giant
                                                    SBR Posting Legend
                                                    • 01-21-12
                                                    • 21480

                                                    #26
                                                    Originally posted by Bluehorseshoe
                                                    Artie Lange.
                                                    What about him?

                                                    I can't figure out what your post is trying to say.
                                                    Comment
                                                    • Hugh Madbrough
                                                      SBR Wise Guy
                                                      • 01-08-12
                                                      • 834

                                                      #27
                                                      Originally posted by Chi_archie
                                                      donk what would you do to her?

                                                      Groce. I'd rather have a nice clean weiner in my mouth and i'm not even gay.
                                                      Comment
                                                      • Bostongambler
                                                        BARRELED IN @ SBR!
                                                        • 02-01-08
                                                        • 35581

                                                        #28
                                                        Originally posted by Chi_archie
                                                        Rest in Porn
                                                        Hahahaha
                                                        Comment
                                                        • DiggityDaggityDo
                                                          SBR Aristocracy
                                                          • 11-30-08
                                                          • 81450

                                                          #29
                                                          Originally posted by Hugh Madbrough
                                                          Groce. I'd rather have a nice clean weiner in my mouth and i'm not even gay.
                                                          Comment
                                                          • Auto Donk
                                                            SBR Aristocracy
                                                            • 09-03-13
                                                            • 43558

                                                            #30
                                                            Originally posted by DiggityDaggityDo
                                                            his subtle way of coming out or at least admitting he's bi.....
                                                            Comment
                                                            • DiggityDaggityDo
                                                              SBR Aristocracy
                                                              • 11-30-08
                                                              • 81450

                                                              #31
                                                              Artie Lang is banged the fuk up.

                                                              How is that guy even still alive??
                                                              Comment
                                                              • The Giant
                                                                SBR Posting Legend
                                                                • 01-21-12
                                                                • 21480

                                                                #32
                                                                Originally posted by DiggityDaggityDo
                                                                Artie Lang is banged the fuk up.

                                                                How is that guy even still alive??

                                                                He's in jail.
                                                                Comment
                                                                • Auto Donk
                                                                  SBR Aristocracy
                                                                  • 09-03-13
                                                                  • 43558

                                                                  #33
                                                                  no shit, what for?
                                                                  Comment
                                                                  • The Giant
                                                                    SBR Posting Legend
                                                                    • 01-21-12
                                                                    • 21480

                                                                    #34
                                                                    Originally posted by Auto Donk
                                                                    no shit, what for?
                                                                    I think it was for failing to show up at a court appearance.

                                                                    He needs to be in jail.

                                                                    Or rehab.

                                                                    He's on a collision course towards death. He can't get off heroin.
                                                                    Comment
                                                                    • Auto Donk
                                                                      SBR Aristocracy
                                                                      • 09-03-13
                                                                      • 43558

                                                                      #35
                                                                      mugshot reveals he's resorted to shooting up via his nose:




                                                                      jail cell close circuit reveals it's a tough gig for him with his new cell mate, too:


                                                                      Comment
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