the brain is about to get emotional...even tough guys have hearts

bobby heenan · 03-13-13, 02:18 AM

Ya I wasn't always the most romantic...or always sending you flowers and making you feel as special as u made me feel...i thought the sacrifices i made for you showed u that..but in uiur warped mind you easily forgot about them..but I held your hand, let u sit next to me instead of across from me when we went out to eat, and went to church with you every Sunday....I sat through 3 hours of maroon 5 and train for your birthday...hell I even took u to see magic mike and had to deal with Channing tatum and mcConaughey in chaps....I loved your dog more than anyone else in your family besides you

I live in the place we once shared...I sleep in the bed we once shared...see the walls you painted and the appliances you picked out

But you had to go back because your narcissistic mother wanted u back so u could be there for her...while she sat around abusing prescription drugs in a fog...u did the household chores in order to feel loved and help out...and I even made more sacrifice and moved to your hometown ...and she drove a wedge between us ...I wish I could forget

clynnm17 · 03-13-13, 02:23 AM

bobby heenan · 03-13-13, 02:32 AM

Originally posted by clynnm17

I know man..sorry...I'm searching my head too

Fidel_CashFlow · 03-13-13, 02:33 AM

Originally posted by bobby heenan

today would have been 3 years...

i remember the first time you came to see me..it wasnt the first time wed met...but the first time we thought it could be....the night before you arrived in town and we went out with your family from here...i got hammered....the next day we went to your cousins state championship game...it rained...you sat in the backseat on the way and i sat in the front....we had drinks at lunch...then waited in the rain to buy tickets...you complained how your new coat was going to be ruined because it was soaked lol....after the game we sat in the backseat together and chugged from a bottle of whiskey together.....we went out to eat for one of my friends birthdays after we got back....one guy there who you knew said "oh i hate that guy hes an asshole"....after that we went to your cousins house and watched a pacquiao fight...you were so bored lol....then i took you to a shithole dive bar...they took our picture and hung it on the wall...i was a wreck lol....and you drive me home and we fell asleep together....i know...im no romeo or prince charming.....the next night we had a big family dinner at your relatives house....and the next day before I had to go to work I stopped over to see you/check on you....you had just gotten out of the shower and were in your towel lathering yourself up with mositurizer when i opened the door....you tossed me a peanut butter cup as i walked out the door...

it had always seemed like destiny....you had always had a crush on me since you were a young girl...i thought the timing was finally right and you were finally mature enough that our 6 year age difference wouldnt matter....you were the first real love of my life...so beautiful and full of energy and life.....i still have some of the cards you gave me on birthdays/anniversaries...the notes you would leave me...i dont look at them but i remember some of the words...the plans we had.....and how sad it is that it wasnt meant to be no matter how much we both wanted it to be....

the brain needed somewhere to vent and this was it folks...sorry....hope i can get some sleep tonight

Originally posted by bobby heenan

Ya I wasn't always the most romantic...or always sending you flowers and making you feel as special as u made me feel...i thought the sacrifices i made for you showed u that..but in uiur warped mind you easily forgot about them..but I held your hand, let u sit next to me instead of across from me when we went out to eat, and went to church with you every Sunday....I sat through 3 hours of maroon 5 and train for your birthday...hell I even took u to see magic mike and had to deal with Channing tatum and mcConaughey in chaps....I loved your dog more than anyone else in your family besides you

I live in the place we once shared...I sleep in the bed we once shared...see the walls you painted and the appliances you picked out

But you had to go back because your narcissistic mother wanted u back so u could be there for her...while she sat around abusing prescription drugs in a fog...u did the household chores in order to feel loved and help out...and I even made more sacrifice and moved to your hometown ...and she drove a wedge between us ...I wish I could forget

Good chance she will randomly read all this and reconsider

bobby heenan · 03-13-13, 02:42 AM

Originally posted by Fidel_CashFlow

Good chance she will randomly read all this and reconsider

That's not what I would want anyway...all girls are crazy but this one has a legit issue/condition...but no official diagnoses...

It ended because of me...I couldn't take it anymore...I threatened to leave a lot and it just kept festering...but many times I got sucked in...because it was intense and there was a bond

I have all the answers and I get it...it wasn't going to work...but there are days I miss her and being best friends like we were...we just can't be anymore

Fidel_CashFlow · 03-13-13, 02:48 AM

Love is one crazy animal isnt it

bobby heenan · 03-13-13, 02:56 AM

Originally posted by Fidel_CashFlow

Love is one crazy animal isnt it

Fuckin A right chief

The Kraken · 03-13-13, 06:43 AM

Drunk on a Wednesday morning

bobby we gotta hang out paL.

fwiw, I also went wi my girl to see train and maroon 5, as well as magic mike. The things we do for companionship and pussy.

bobby heenan · 03-13-13, 08:00 PM

Originally posted by The Kraken

Drunk on a Wednesday morning

bobby we gotta hang out paL.

fwiw, I also went wi my girl to see train and maroon 5, as well as magic mike. The things we do for companionship and pussy.

ya man..if only i had the strength to walk away when i knew something wasnt right....but i enjoyed the little simple things...like being texted good night i love you...holding hands as we fell asleep together...the treats that were baked....the companionship....penetrate the pussy that shit got old after awhile...i had plenty of it and still get it....but its not the same...i have girls throwing themselves at me that want to date me and i just cant go there...too much damage done to my heart and mind.....i was so healthy...i quit drinking, gambling(disappeared from sbr for awhile)...now im back to getting bent and picked up the habit of smoking which i had never done in my 32 years on earth.....what a bitch it can be sometimes

but ya we should def hang....i have a bottle of chardonay and fresh pack right now

Chi_archie · 03-13-13, 08:11 PM

hang in there Bobby

in 1 week we will be celebrating a FOUR year anniversary of greater importance with first round madness!!!!!

your SBR join date anniversary!

bobby heenan · 03-13-13, 08:22 PM

Originally posted by Chi_archie

hang in there Bobby

in 1 week we will be celebrating a FOUR year anniversary of greater importance with first round madness!!!!!

your SBR join date anniversary!

thanks man...appreciate the support...im hangin

i took this hot chick to a jason aldean concert a few weeks ago for her birthday...but i got so drunk she was def pissed....we were in the 2nd row in front of the stage ..she was good about it even though she told me "i wanted to flip out on you but i stayed calm"....then the next night she had a birthday party at a bar ...i started drinking at 5 and showed up at like 9 or 10 a complete mess and her parents were there.....her dad was like "who the penetrate is that kid'....."thats the guy i went to the concert last night with"....he was not pleased...im self sabatoging....i actually started getting teary eyed when he did that song he did with kelly clarkson the duet

the brain has some demons...ive been thinking about checking into a rehab or seeing a therapist...but i feel like by now it would be a big step back....i just started working again and found a job that i actually like....im afraid of having to take a leave

Cuse0323 · 03-13-13, 08:43 PM

Get some help before it gets to the point where there is no other option, shit only gets worse. GL man.