Thinking About Selling My House and My Cars

[Holtgetsback]

And moving my family to a small town in an English friendly country with a low cost of living...

When I was younger I guess I thought material things and "success" mattered...they do not. I think I could be happier living in a one room shack somewhere far away from home working at a fruit stand. Family does not seem as close anymore and I fear I will run out of time with them. I feel like my life is being run by stress..whether it be at the office, at home and even on my free time. Do not want kids to have to deal with the same things I must day in and day out. I want to show them that happiness is a way of life and not determined by society.

Just talked to my wife and she agrees 100% with me. She is in the same boat and also feels this would be a good opportunity to grow.

My house and cars are all paid off.

Open to all suggestions and Tips on my move.

[Fishhead]

This is the best idea that you've had since you began posting here.

This will be a great decision if you are able to pull it off.

[Boner_18]

Sure the grind can be a dead end, but why not have your cake and eat it too? Have you progressed in the rat race enough to tell your boss/company that you want to step to the sideline? Not retire just scale back your role to 40 hours w/ plenty of allowances for time off. Maybe sell a couple cars, downsize your digs and travel a lot. Getting in touch w/ your happiness doesn't have to be an all or nothing approach.

[Holtgetsback]

Sure the grind can be a dead end, but why not have your cake and eat it too? Have you progressed in the rat race enough to tell your boss/company that you want to step to the sideline? Not retire just scale back your role to 40 hours w/ plenty of allowances for time off. Maybe sell a couple cars, downsize your digs and travel a lot. Getting in touch w/ your happiness doesn't have to be an all or nothing approach.

Started out as a social worker at a state hospital. Worked a job on the side at an Assisted Living company for 15 years and I am now the CEO there. Wife is on the Board of Directors and a few steps below me. She has been at the company since the beginning also. With everything going on... taxes being raised, our hours being cut and the new Health Care Bill I am not sure how we will be able to survive without laying off a large number of staff. Even then the staff that would be left would be working for peanuts.


We pull in about 200k between us. The money is not worth the work and stress.

[Holtgetsback]

Not to mention all the traveling my wife and I have to do throughout the state.

Driving three hours a day (sometimes six round trip)three days a week for the last five years has taken its toll on us as a whole. We have an apartment that we have rented only for these meetings.

[jjgold]

Seems like a bailout of life and I do not like it.

Ways to scale back and relax more.

Living poor is not way to go

life is a fukkin battle

[Domestic]

Seems like a bailout of life and I do not like it. Ways to scale back and relax more. Living poor is not way to go life is a fukkin battle

Fukking love JJ

[Fishhead]

Seems like a bailout of life and I do not like it.

Ways to scale back and relax more.

Living poor is not way to go

life is a fukkin battle

[Holtgetsback]

Seems like a bailout of life and I do not like it.

Ways to scale back and relax more.

Living poor is not way to go

life is a fukkin battle

A bailout of life????? Living poor??

I've never been so financially comfortable in my life. I never said I would be living poor. That would be irresponsible.

I plan on working wherever I move to.. Just not a job with no future in a field that is dying. This career has been eating away at my wife and i......my boys too... for the last 10 years... Relationships are strained due to stress.

JJ i could buy you over 10 times son. This is real.

[jjgold]

Living in a fukkin hut Is the nit the answer. It seems your trying to find yourself. I bet you do not know who you are either.

I say your smoking pot in one year and have long hair as you distance youself from reality.

Holter your on fukkin tilt

[Holtgetsback]

Living in a fukkin hut Is the nit the answer. It seems your trying to find yourself. I bet you do not know who you are either.

I say your smoking pot in one year and have long hair as you distance youself from reality.

Holter your on fukkin tilt

You might be right....

But you know what..I'm not worried about myself anymore. I am worried about finding my family.

God Bless You

[pavyracer]

Your biggest problem is finding an English friendly country.

Q: What's an English friendly country?

[Holtgetsback]

Your biggest problem is finding an English friendly country.

Q: What's an English friendly country?

Sorry pavyracer. What I meant was English speaking countries.


But if you Google English Friendly Countries you will get 68 million hits pal.

[pavyracer]

Sorry pavyracer. What I meant was English speaking countries.


But if you Google English Friendly Countries you will get 68 million hits pal.

If you are willing to relocate to a different country because you like the lifestyle you can always learn a new language to communicate. In this way you have more options. You can buy cheaper land, house, taxes, cost of life. These are the items you need to be looking at.

[mrbeer05]

I will give you 500.00 for your car.

[Holtgetsback]

If you are willing to relocate to a different country because you like the lifestyle you can always learn a new language to communicate. In this way you have more options. You can buy cheaper land, house, taxes, cost of life. These are the items you need to be looking at.

**** you pavy. I am an older guy...I can barely remember what I had for dinner last night... let alone learn a new language by the time I am dead.

[pavyracer]

**** you pavy. I am an older guy...I can barely remember what I had for dinner last night... let alone learn a new language by the time I am dead.

Don't you think that you have to pay a premium to live in an English speaking foreign country? If you have deep pockets and can outlive your money do it!

[ngates815]

JJ i could buy you over 10 times son. This is real.

A guy who says this, definitely wouldn't be able to hack it in a foreign country. You'd be walking by a poor guy who looked at you the wrong way, and you'd tell him you could buy him over 1,000 times. He'd gut you like a fish. Then what would your family do?


Your wife will end up leaving you, because she wants to be with a real man, that can fight through the hard/stressful times. Have fun being lonely.

[Holtgetsback]

Don't you think that you have to pay a premium to live in an English speaking foreign country? If you have deep pockets and can outlive your money do it!

I'm not real familiar with all the premiums and taxes or whatever of a foreign country.

To be perfectly honest I don't even have a very good idea of where I would like to live.

Do you have any suggestions or advice? besides learning a new language of a country I don't want to live in

[Holtgetsback]

A guy who says this, definitely wouldn't be able to hack it in a foreign country. You'd be walking by a poor guy who looked at you the wrong way, and you'd tell him you could buy him over 1,000 times. He'd gut you like a fish. Then what would your family do?


Your wife will end up leaving you, because she wants to be with a real man, that can fight through the hard/stressful times. Have fun being lonely.

that was to jjgold buddy...i kind of stole it from him

[ngates815]

Move to Jamaica....

[pavyracer]

I'm not real familiar with all the premiums and taxes or whatever of a foreign country.

To be perfectly honest I don't even have a very good idea of where I would like to live.

Do you have any suggestions or advice? besides learning a new language of a country I don't want to live in

Spain, Portugal, Croatia, Greek Isles..Any of these places will be great. With the way the Euro is falling down ATM your dollars have more purchasing power there.

[jjgold]

This is turning into a classic, Holter is someone giving you a hard time at work? I can read you like a book, I know what you want too. It not the fukin job at all, its your fukkin kids and your wife nagging you and you feel fukkin trapped and ready to explode, your livng in a fukkin legal prison every night with no outlets. I would get rid of wife and go find yourself a nice 22 year old and fuk like crazy and gamble like crazy and Is wear everything will be fixed. I can guarantee that will work.

[PittsburghPlayer]

GL Holt. Part of me feels bad for men like you that have children and want a better life for them. Wish I had some words of wisdom, but my words are to the men and boys that do not have children. To them I say, keep not having any. GL Men, we are through. Money, Lies, and Greed fukked us up. And we the people (both parties) let it happen.

[Holtgetsback]

This is turning into a classic, Holter is someone giving you a hard time at work?I can read you like a book, I know what you want too. It not the fukin job at all, its your fukkin kids and your wife nagging you and you feel fukkin trapped and ready to explode, your livng in a fukkin legal prison every night with no outlets. I would get rid of wife and go find yourself a nice 22 year old and fuk like crazy and gamble like crazy and Is wear everything will be fixed. I can guarantee that will work.

Yeah the government is.

Once again you may be right.

We'll see how these little ****ers feel when I rent them out to a rugged farmer for 10 hours a day of hard labor while I sit back in my hut drinking margaritas


kidding of course..

I love my family...they have been nothing but supportive of me and I feel like it owe it to them try and be the father I wish my dad was. I am never around them and don't have the relationship we used to. I cannot do that with the job and lifestyle we currently have and feel like if I don't do something about it I will lose them forever.

You sick ****.

[Holtgetsback]

GL Holt. Part of me feels bad for men like you that have children and want a better life for them. Wish I had some words of wisdom, but my words are to the men and boys that do not have children. To them I say, keep not having any. GL Men, we are through. Money, Lies, and Greed fukked us up. And we the people (both parties) let it happen.

Thanks player...

you speak the truth tough times to raise a family in

[PittsburghPlayer]

Thank you for the kind words Holt. Wish you the best. Way I see it, man cares about nothing if he has a few bucks in his pocket.

[mrmarket]

Not a polarized decision at all. Why do you have to move to some foreign country to live some perceived simplistic pastoral lifestyle? It is not going to be idyllic and will not live up to your expectations.
Not to mention there are a host of things you are even not considering. How about taking a month long sabbatical and visiting a foreign country before you consider living in it to get a taste of the culture/lifestyle. You may find that the vacation is all you needed to recharge your batteries. Or you could just do a career change and make an effort to spend more time with your family which seems a much more appropriate choice based on your posts in this thread.

[Holtgetsback]

Not a polarized decision at all. Why do you have to move to some foreign country to live some perceived simplistic pastoral lifestyle? It is not going to be idyllic and will not live up to your expectations.
Not to mention there are a host of things you are even not considering. How about taking a month long sabbatical and visiting a foreign country before you consider living in it to get a taste of the culture/lifestyle. You may find that the vacation is all you needed to recharge your batteries. Or you could just do a career change and make an effort to spend more time with your family which seems a much more appropriate choice based on your posts in this thread.

Been looking at orbitz for the last few hours and researching like a mad man... (in effort to visit before i commit)

Thanks for your input though it is always welcome here!! A career change is definitely neccessary...

Ever been out of the country market?? I went backpacking throughout Europe for 6 months...jeez 25 years ago...where does the time go..

Anyways I loved the culture and the people but I haven't been back since...

[str]

Holt,
Before I could begin to offer any advise, what state do you live in?
Without that I have no clue of your current surroundings and scope of rat race.
With 3 grown kids , I think I know where you are coming from.

[str]

Also, are your kids teenagers?

[mrmarket]

Been looking at orbitz for the last few hours and researching like a mad man... (in effort to visit before i commit)

Thanks for your input though it is always welcome here!! A career change is definitely neccessary...

Ever been out of the country market?? I went backpacking throughout Europe for 6 months...jeez 25 years ago...where does the time go..

Anyways I loved the culture and the people but I haven't been back since...

I've traveled around spending most of my time in Europe specifically living in Germany, Italy and Greece. Night life was better in Europe but culturally there were not huge differences (from Canada). At least not enough that I would consider living there full time. Industrialized nations all face the same challenges in regards to personal vs work life balance problems.

I don't have that much experience with underdeveloped countries but have spent time in Guatemala on a friends family hacienda (he grows sugar cane) while visiting around. I was fortunate enough to be living in luxurious accommodations while there but would not want to live there full time even taking that into account.

If I was in your situation I would just change careers to one that is less time intensive or work part time. You have to make an effort to spend more time with the family though because simply working less will not be a panacea to your problems.

[Holtgetsback]

Hey str...good to have you with us.

I currently reside in Indiana .. The boys are 12 and 10.. fire away

[Holtgetsback]

everyone else please feel free to share your experiences outside the US..

great post market...you sure it was sugar cane??

[str]

Speaking from my own experience,when my kids (3) got around that age, it got really tough.I worked a job in the sports field that,no exaggeration,was 6 days at around 10-12 hours a day and 1 day at around 4 hours . EVERY DAY. I took Christmas day off. Period.
Holidays were big days in my field. Being in that field , the more time I took off, the more the opposition gained an edge. Tough business.So when I started to steal a couple of hours here and there to make events that my kids participated in, over time it started to catch up.I could feel the edge that I felt I had, starting to slip.
Long story short,I did this for about 4 years before leaving a job I had been in for over 20 years. It seemingly took me 3 or 4 years to finally decide to leave but in hind sight, I had made that decision,the first time I left to catch a little league game.Sounds to me that you might have also.
So if you leave your job,you take care of what probably ails you and your wife. But have you discussed uprooting your family with your sons? It is not that you need their approval, but you should hear what they have to say.They will appreciate the opportunity and the respect that you gave them in years to come, even if they cant show it now.Also, is someone else around to help with your parents as well as your wife's parents if they are still alive?
My opinion is to change jobs and see where that takes you. If after a year or so, leaving the country still seems right, well , maybe that's what you need to do. I live in Maryland so I am not much help with Indiana .Where I live in Maryland it is a very expense place to raise a family. Wasn't that way 30 years ago but is now. A lot of people I know that started to struggle with the expenses moved to Maryland's eastern shore, Deleware and N.C.They have all said the same thing.Everything's less expensive and the pace of life is slower.
You have a ton of options but again, in my opinion, making several drastic life changing decisions all at once,throws so many things at a fix that you might never know which one really was the fix.
A plan with several steps to it seems like the safest way to approach this and like it or not you have to play it safe for the sake of your sons,especially at that age.
I hope that helps.Good luck.