Sucking the Metal Thingy on the Water Fountain (and paying for it)

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  • armyoflovers
    SBR Wise Guy
    • 07-26-07
    • 714

    #1
    Sucking the Metal Thingy on the Water Fountain (and paying for it)
    I was waiting to get a gulp of water last week from the water fountain at work and in front of me was this fukkking smoking hot bitch who I wanted to hammer for a while. I jack off to her all the time.

    Anyway she was slurping some water at the water fountain and I followed behind her and drank some water. And I didnt just drink water. In some perverted attempt to be closer to her, I put my lips and mouth all over the metal water spout and sucked it and licked it rather heartedly, then went into the stall and wanked off.

    Well this past Saturday night I was at home playing online checkers with some people in Iceland (i won btw) and all of the sudden I got this nasty canker sore all over my gums on the inside. I cant even eat it hurts so bad and is so raw and pussy (not pussy but puss - eeee), I can only drink water and chicken broth.

    So my question is did I get this grody-ass thing from sucking on the water spout or what?

    I think I am going hunrgy, I am looking like Ghandi. I rubbed some Ben Gay on it but that only made it worse.

    Help?
  • Panic
    SBR Posting Legend
    • 01-06-08
    • 10367

    #2
    No you got it from the girl. She has a STD.
    Comment
    • bettilimbroke999
      SBR Posting Legend
      • 02-04-08
      • 13254

      #3
      I would have to say that the canker sore is the least of your problems
      Comment
      • Panic
        SBR Posting Legend
        • 01-06-08
        • 10367

        #4
        Got that sh!t from her and didnt even get to bang her.
        Comment
        • armyoflovers
          SBR Wise Guy
          • 07-26-07
          • 714

          #5
          Originally posted by Panic
          Got that sh!t from her and didnt even get to bang her.
          You think so? Maybe she owes me a handjob for giving me herpes?
          Comment
          • Panic
            SBR Posting Legend
            • 01-06-08
            • 10367

            #6
            Originally posted by armyoflovers
            You think so? Maybe she owes me a handjob for giving me herpes?
            I would say so.
            Comment
            • bbyhill
              SBR MVP
              • 09-16-07
              • 2991

              #7
              her lips probably never touched any of the metal.It is probably from some dudes that did the same thing before.
              Comment
              • armyoflovers
                SBR Wise Guy
                • 07-26-07
                • 714

                #8
                Originally posted by bbyhill
                her lips probably never touched any of the metal.It is probably from some dudes that did the same thing before.
                Do guys usually suck fountain spouts? If so I am going to gag.
                Comment
                • gordon gekko
                  SBR MVP
                  • 05-01-08
                  • 2842

                  #9
                  Army you are an idiot.
                  Comment
                  • Shark79
                    SBR Posting Legend
                    • 11-19-07
                    • 11211

                    #10
                    Originally posted by armyoflovers
                    I was waiting to get a gulp of water last week from the water fountain at work and in front of me was this fukkking smoking hot bitch who I wanted to hammer for a while. I jack off to her all the time.

                    Anyway she was slurping some water at the water fountain and I followed behind her and drank some water. And I didnt just drink water. In some perverted attempt to be closer to her, I put my lips and mouth all over the metal water spout and sucked it and licked it rather heartedly, then went into the stall and wanked off.

                    Well this past Saturday night I was at home playing online checkers with some people in Iceland (i won btw) and all of the sudden I got this nasty canker sore all over my gums on the inside. I cant even eat it hurts so bad and is so raw and pussy (not pussy but puss - eeee), I can only drink water and chicken broth.

                    So my question is did I get this grody-ass thing from sucking on the water spout or what?

                    I think I am going hunrgy, I am looking like Ghandi. I rubbed some Ben Gay on it but that only made it worse.

                    Help?



                    You should wank with BenGay .. that will help
                    Comment
                    • armyoflovers
                      SBR Wise Guy
                      • 07-26-07
                      • 714

                      #11
                      Originally posted by gordon gekko
                      Army you are an idiot.
                      Maybe a likeable idiot?
                      Comment
                      • blittydeuce
                        SBR Hall of Famer
                        • 06-11-08
                        • 5572

                        #12
                        Comment
                        • max_asdf
                          SBR MVP
                          • 07-22-08
                          • 1362

                          #13
                          Comment
                          • englishmike
                            SBR Hall of Famer
                            • 06-19-08
                            • 5279

                            #14
                            Originally posted by armyoflovers
                            Maybe a likeable idiot?
                            Not sure about likeable idiot, i think you're frighteningly capable of stalking, raping and dismembering mutilated corpses but I think you're hilariously funny. That probably says more about me than it does you.
                            Comment
                            • treece
                              SBR Hall of Famer
                              • 11-28-07
                              • 6298

                              #15
                              Originally posted by gordon gekko
                              Army you are an idiot.
                              I was going to say that.
                              Comment
                              • bmw530i
                                Restricted User
                                • 04-19-08
                                • 4058

                                #16
                                haha great story Army..was she wearing lipstick?
                                Comment
                                • armyoflovers
                                  SBR Wise Guy
                                  • 07-26-07
                                  • 714

                                  #17
                                  Breaking News! The canker sores just went away after applying calamine lotion mixed with epsom salt, but in an unrelated issue I got chiggers near my nutsack.....what the fuk gives?!?!?!?
                                  Comment
                                  • Tsoprano
                                    BARRELED IN @ SBR!
                                    • 04-14-08
                                    • 26374

                                    #18
                                    Originally posted by armyoflovers
                                    Breaking News! The canker sores just went away after applying calamine lotion mixed with epsom salt, but in an unrelated issue I got chiggers near my nutsack.....what the fuk gives?!?!?!?


                                    He's back!!!!!
                                    Comment
                                    • RogueScholar
                                      SBR Hall of Famer
                                      • 02-05-07
                                      • 5082

                                      #19
                                      I had a tick on my nutsack a couple years ago, that was about the most traumatic experience of my life. And using the glowing hot pin to get it to back itself out was absolutely miserable. Whoever says drugs are easy money has no clue about a damned thing.
                                      Originally posted by StraitShooter
                                      90% of the guys dont give a shit about your problems..and the other 10 are glad you have them..
                                      Comment
                                      • Stumpage
                                        SBR MVP
                                        • 09-21-05
                                        • 2906

                                        #20
                                        Originally posted by armyoflovers
                                        Do guys usually suck fountain spouts? If so I am going to gag.
                                        I didn't think so until I read your original post.....
                                        Comment
                                        • RogueJuror
                                          SBR Posting Legend
                                          • 07-08-08
                                          • 10010

                                          #21
                                          Originally posted by Tsoprano


                                          He's back!!!!!


                                          Comment
                                          • Richkas
                                            SBR Posting Legend
                                            • 02-03-08
                                            • 19396

                                            #22
                                            Originally posted by armyoflovers
                                            I was waiting to get a gulp of water last week from the water fountain at work and in front of me was this fukkking smoking hot bitch who I wanted to hammer for a while. I jack off to her all the time.

                                            Anyway she was slurping some water at the water fountain and I followed behind her and drank some water. And I didnt just drink water. In some perverted attempt to be closer to her, I put my lips and mouth all over the metal water spout and sucked it and licked it rather heartedly, then went into the stall and wanked off.

                                            Well this past Saturday night I was at home playing online checkers with some people in Iceland (i won btw) and all of the sudden I got this nasty canker sore all over my gums on the inside. I cant even eat it hurts so bad and is so raw and pussy (not pussy but puss - eeee), I can only drink water and chicken broth.

                                            So my question is did I get this grody-ass thing from sucking on the water spout or what?

                                            I think I am going hunrgy, I am looking like Ghandi. I rubbed some Ben Gay on it but that only made it worse.

                                            Help?
                                            I'd like to go with you to the strip club
                                            Comment
                                            • flyingillini
                                              SBR Aristocracy
                                              • 12-06-06
                                              • 41219

                                              #23
                                              I love this thread! Ha, keep up the good work fellas!
                                              המוסד‎
                                              המוסד למודיעין ולתפקידים מיוחדים‎
                                              Comment
                                              • blackbart
                                                SBR MVP
                                                • 12-04-07
                                                • 3838

                                                #24
                                                you better confront her, with details, wouldnt want her infecting other innocent stalkers
                                                Comment
                                                • blittydeuce
                                                  SBR Hall of Famer
                                                  • 06-11-08
                                                  • 5572

                                                  #25
                                                  wow
                                                  Comment
                                                  • HAPPY BOY
                                                    SBR Hall of Famer
                                                    • 08-10-05
                                                    • 7109

                                                    #26
                                                    Hey Army i got your cure pal. wait till this hot chick is on the rag, then take her used tampon and make a nice hot tea. This should clear you right up.
                                                    Comment
                                                    • SportsLockPicks
                                                      SBR MVP
                                                      • 12-03-07
                                                      • 3386

                                                      #27
                                                      you could strain some of that tasty puss into her coffee when she isn't looking, thus returning the germs back to the std infested slampig skank whorebag cumdumpster slut of a girl who loves it in the shitpipe.
                                                      Comment
                                                      • armyoflovers
                                                        SBR Wise Guy
                                                        • 07-26-07
                                                        • 714

                                                        #28
                                                        Originally posted by HAPPY BOY
                                                        Hey Army i got your cure pal. wait till this hot chick is on the rag, then take her used tampon and make a nice hot tea. This should clear you right up.
                                                        i tried this, cleared up all my acne but made my semen watery. Also it has made me addicted to old reruns of Wheel of Fortune. Hmmm....
                                                        Comment
                                                        • BeatTheJerk
                                                          BARRELED IN @ SBR!
                                                          • 08-19-07
                                                          • 31794

                                                          #29
                                                          This sick fuk is back. Oh God ................... Let the madness begin !
                                                          Comment
                                                          • jjgold
                                                            SBR Aristocracy
                                                            • 07-20-05
                                                            • 388179

                                                            #30
                                                            Never put your mouth on anything armyman

                                                            I hope your ok Chief
                                                            Comment
                                                            • blittydeuce
                                                              SBR Hall of Famer
                                                              • 06-11-08
                                                              • 5572

                                                              #31
                                                              this guy is 'The Original' pecos bill
                                                              Comment
                                                              • Deuce
                                                                BARRELED IN @ SBR!
                                                                • 01-12-08
                                                                • 29843

                                                                #32
                                                                I bet chicken broth felt great on that sore. All that sodium, yummm. That wouldn't hurt at at.
                                                                Comment
                                                                • RogueJuror
                                                                  SBR Posting Legend
                                                                  • 07-08-08
                                                                  • 10010

                                                                  #33
                                                                  I love this guy, I hope he sticks around.

                                                                  Comment
                                                                  • pavyracer
                                                                    SBR Aristocracy
                                                                    • 04-12-07
                                                                    • 82907

                                                                    #34
                                                                    Welcome back BBD!
                                                                    Comment
                                                                    • armyoflovers
                                                                      SBR Wise Guy
                                                                      • 07-26-07
                                                                      • 714

                                                                      #35
                                                                      I got lost on my way to the bathroom to take a god damn dump and just found my way back - and I even forgot to wipe, ugh....did I miss anything the last 6 months?

                                                                      Good to be back, ladies, let the games begin. Im going to bring some more foul-mouthed repugnant anal gunk your way once again....just getting the engine warm.....
                                                                      Comment
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