37 ways you’d be better off as a bum

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  • bobbyfk
    SBR Posting Legend
    • 01-19-09
    • 15218

    #1
    37 ways you’d be better off as a bum
    First, apologies for the blatantly provocative title (although I do make good on it). But did you know that some people prefer to be homeless? I know, sounds crazy right? But I was


    1. You don’t pay taxes on any money you collect
    2. You don’t have a mortgage
    3. You don’t have a boss
    4. You can never get fired
    5. You have zero debt
    6. You can pick up and move anytime you want
    7. You don’t have a car payment
    8. You don’t get stuck in traffic jams
    9. You’ll never break down on the motorway
    10. You don’t have to pay bills
    11. Or remember to pay bills
    12. You don’t care about your credit report
    13. You don’t get harassing calls from collection agencies
    14. You don’t get calls…period
    15. You don’t have to deal with junk mail
    16. You don’t have to wake up to an annoying alarm
    17. You don’t have to do laundry
    18. You don’t get criticized for bad fashion choices
    19. You don’t have email to check
    20. You don’t have to wait three hours in security at the airport
    21. You don’t have to attend parties with people you hate
    22. You don’t have to fix yet another paper jam
    23. You never have to sit through an ad featuring Billy Mays
    24. You don’t have to vacuum
    25. Or spring clean
    26. Or scrub the toilet
    27. You don’t get bothered by cell-phone salesmen in malls
    28. You don’t care about identity theft
    29. You don't give a crap about reality shows (you're living one every day)
    30. Going to jail for the night means a warm bed and a meal
    31. You've (probably) never heard of Paris Hilton or Kim Kardashian
    32. Newspapers are actually handy; and you can read them too
    33. You don't care if gas hits $4 a gallon
    34. Sell-by dates are your friend
    35. Every cent is valuable to you; spare change is an oxymoron
    36. Hair salons are a joke
    37. You can say you're free...and mean it
  • Boner_18
    SBR Hall of Famer
    • 08-24-08
    • 8301

    #2
    Lol funny stuff bobby. I wonder how long the "worse off" list is.
    Comment
    • BIGDAY
      SBR Aristocracy
      • 02-17-10
      • 48247

      #3
      That's one way of looking at it...
      Comment
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