An odd parlay

[Aristocles]

I need lotsa luck

Indianapolis Colts -5
Portland Trailblazers/Chicago Bulls Under 187
Sacramento Kings ML
San Antonio Spurs/Los Angeles Clippers Over 195
Texas Rangers -1½
Philadelphia Flyers ML
Chicago Blackhawks/New York Rangers Over 5½
New Jersey Devils/Vancouver Canucks Under 5½

Stop laughing! A tiny chance at a massive payback