Finally, finally.... i have found the secret to being thin..............

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  • Nicky Santoro
    SBR Posting Legend
    • 04-08-08
    • 16103

    #1
    Finally, finally.... i have found the secret to being thin..............
    Since i am a great guy that i am, i will share the secret to being thin...Boys, you all know me by now that i'm a fat fukk..2 weeks ago, i hit the 235 lb mark for the 1st time ever. i am trying to lose weight but i can't.. But i have found the secret. Of course i can tell you guys to lay off the junk food, but you know that's not going to work. Too many of you gluttons at SBR love your food.. I can tell you to diet and exercise but we know that ain't happening..i can tell you all to go outside for a walk, but i know you boys will never go outside for a walk cause none of you shut ins ever leave the house. the only walking you'll ever do is walk to the kitchen, walk to the toilet, or walk around the living room looking for the remote. I can tell you boys that sex is a great way to lose weight, but i know that most of the guys here have not seen a girl naked or touched a tit in 12 yrs. the last time any of you boys seen a naked woman was 2 nights ago watching the sex channel on tv, so sex is out of the question.. i won't tell you to join a gym cause i know you'll never leave your computer in the day or miss the games at night, so that's out of the question

    So here's the trick boys.. it has worked cause i have already lost 7 lbs in 2 weeks doing this....2 weeks ago, i noticed something.. i had bought 15 Kit Kat's, and Hershey bars and i ate them all in 2 days.. i wondered how i could have ate 15 bars in 2 days.. so for the next 4 days, i had no desserts in the house, and i didn't even think of it.. i only ate what was in the house. bananas, granola bars, fruits.. and i did this for 2 weeks.. then i open up a cupboard yesterday and what do i see.. a bag of 7 bars that i forgot to unpack. so i see the 7 bars and i eat them in 3 hrs..

    You see boys, that's the key.. i only ate them cause they were there.. i didn't even feel like eating chocolate til i saw them.. so the key is.... you ready...... you sure you ready..... the key is.....WHEN YOU DO YOUR GROCERIES, DO NOT BUY ANYTHING FOR YOUR HOUSE THAT IS FATTENING.. ONLY BUY HEALTHY STUFF AND YOU'LL NEVER GAIN WEIGHT.. you see, if it's there, you'll eat it.. if it's not there, you won't eat it...you see boys, you control your own destiny here. i only buy stuff at store that is healthy now. no more chips, no sweets, etc... had i not seen the bars, i never would have eaten them.. but because they were there, i had to eat em. it's all in the head.


    btw, this will not work if you have kids.. only works if you live alone, OR you live with someone.. It won't work either if they tell you to let them buy it and they'll hide it from you cause you will know it's there and you'll want it.. you MUST tell them not to buy any junk food in the house.. so that's it boys, just don't buy any chips, cake or chocoate and pile on the healthy things ONLY for your house when you go shopping and watch the weight come off.

    This Public Service Announcement brought to you by Nicky Santoro...
  • Chi_archie
    SBR Aristocracy
    • 07-22-08
    • 63172

    #2
    Nicky how much do you need to lose, before you start making vids again?
    Comment
    • Nicky Santoro
      SBR Posting Legend
      • 04-08-08
      • 16103

      #3
      archie boy, not before i lose another 60 lbs. archie boy, i am a fat fukk.. i don't want people to laugh at me.. archie, how about you.. there was a time when you were making 4 vids a day at sbr and you too just died down completely..


      btw, i feel bad now cause i know i was rambling on as usual and i made my post too long and a lot of these sbr guys have the attention span of a 3 yr old kid, so they'll never know the secret to being thin....so i will put it in short.


      boys, do NOT buy any junk food in your house and only buy healthy food and you will be thin.. tha'ts all i really had to say, but i can never shut up..
      Comment
      • Chi_archie
        SBR Aristocracy
        • 07-22-08
        • 63172

        #4
        Nicky, vids are out..... they were fun for awhile but, unless it is really really really creative no one watches them. I haven't even watched a JJ vid in 4-6 months... I've only seen a 2-3 vids the past few months... one was Brock Lander's return video I don't even remember the others..


        Nicky exercise is the key, forget diet alone.... if you don't eat junk food your body will just lower the metabolism..... you need both exercise and diet....


        unless you are vegas dave, he seemed to do well by just eliminating fast food and junk food.... I wonder how he is doing on his quest to lose 100 pounds?


        I think SBR might have sabotaged that for him
        Comment
        • Deuce
          BARRELED IN @ SBR!
          • 01-12-08
          • 29843

          #5
          Nicky, get your fat ass on the ice again Nicky and I swear to GOD you work out with those Habs you will be back to pre gambling weight in NO TIME. I swear to God Nicky, go lace up, grab your Eric Desjardins 1994 replica Sherwood Nicky and place some hockey.
          Comment
          • BGS 9.5
            SBR MVP
            • 01-10-08
            • 4628

            #6
            Quite the epiphany you had there Nicky, never would have guessed that myself.
            Comment
            • smitch124
              SBR Posting Legend
              • 05-19-08
              • 12566

              #7
              You can do all that and then notice, WOW! I have 125 SBR points, I'm gonna have a pizza delivered!!

              and boom! its back to Obesity-town
              Comment
              • jellobiafra
                SBR Hall of Famer
                • 03-08-09
                • 6291

                #8
                Originally posted by Nicky Santoro
                Finally, finally.... i have found the secret to being thin
                Originally posted by Nicky Santoro
                WHEN YOU DO YOUR GROCERIES... ONLY BUY HEALTHY STUFF.

                Comment
                • Nicky Santoro
                  SBR Posting Legend
                  • 04-08-08
                  • 16103

                  #9
                  bgs,

                  i don't knwo what epiphany means and i even looked it up..

                  smitchy,

                  true, but you have to make a vow to god never to order out. that was the only flaw..


                  jello, i have no idea what you are saying buddy.. that's exactly what i meant..
                  Comment
                  • smitch124
                    SBR Posting Legend
                    • 05-19-08
                    • 12566

                    #10
                    They need to adopt a no pizza delivery list......10-15 lbs or more overweight no pizza delivery.
                    Comment
                    • jellobiafra
                      SBR Hall of Famer
                      • 03-08-09
                      • 6291

                      #11
                      Not saying anything Nicky. Just admiring the beautiful simplicity of your revelation.
                      Comment
                      • Richkas
                        SBR Posting Legend
                        • 02-03-08
                        • 19396

                        #12
                        I hear ya Nicky. I smoke weed all day and these are my munchies.
                        Comment
                        • Chi_archie
                          SBR Aristocracy
                          • 07-22-08
                          • 63172

                          #13
                          Nicky, in your current condition do you think you could still go back to that park and beat that teen-ager like 5 times in a row on hockey face-offs?

                          that was an impressive display, the hands and talent are still there obviously... but do you think the extra weight would affect you?
                          Comment
                          • BGS 9.5
                            SBR MVP
                            • 01-10-08
                            • 4628

                            #14
                            Comment
                            • Indecent
                              SBR Wise Guy
                              • 09-08-09
                              • 758

                              #15
                              Good for you. Try eating smaller meals throughout the day, every 3 hours or so (6 times a day is preferred). This will keep your metabolism up and keep your body running full steam.

                              Combining this with your revelation about just not buying the junk food and you should continue shedding pounds with minimal effort. GL!
                              Comment
                              • Richkas
                                SBR Posting Legend
                                • 02-03-08
                                • 19396

                                #16
                                Originally posted by Richkas
                                I hear ya Nicky. I smoke weed all day and these are my munchies.

                                What happened to my picture
                                Comment
                                • Nicky Santoro
                                  SBR Posting Legend
                                  • 04-08-08
                                  • 16103

                                  #17
                                  Originally posted by Chi_archie
                                  Nicky, in your current condition do you think you could still go back to that park and beat that teen-ager like 5 times in a row on hockey face-offs?

                                  that was an impressive display, the hands and talent are still there obviously... but do you think the extra weight would affect you?
                                  good job, richie.

                                  thanks archie, yes, the hands and talent are there, but the heart isn't.. too much blubber around it..
                                  Comment
                                  • Chi_archie
                                    SBR Aristocracy
                                    • 07-22-08
                                    • 63172

                                    #18
                                    i'm not sure I was fat and out of shape and I still beat skinny little sammy in a free throw competition Nicky...


                                    20 straight free throws without barely touching a ball for 5 years..... us old guys have alot going for us..... experience, Brains, bravado..... look at Brett Favre
                                    Comment
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