Jokes that include the word fcuk

[Willie Bee]

An old bull and a young bull are standing up on the ridge looking down at a grassy valley below full of seasoned cows and some pretty young heifers. The young bull turns to the old bull and says, "Old bull, let's run down there and fcuk us a heifer!"

The old bull turns to the young bull and says, "I got a better idea. Let's walk down and make love to them all."

Your turn.

[pavyracer]

[ATTACH]5506[/ATTACH]

[sickler]

Good one, Willie.

My contribution:

A guy says to his friend, "I can't remember if the doctor told me my wife has AIDS or Alzheimer's."
His friend says, "It's simple. Drive her to the other side of town. Leave without her. If she finds her way home, don't fuk her."

[frostno98]

An old bull and a young bull are standing up on the ridge looking down at a grassy valley below full of seasoned cows and some pretty young heifers. The young bull turns to the old bull and says, "Old bull, let's run down there and fcuk us a heifer!"

The old bull turns to the young bull and says, "I got a better idea. Let's walk down and make love to them all."

Your turn.

Yeah I remember quote too! from the movie colors.

[pico]

willie, i don;t get the joke

[HedgeHog]

A guy is walking on the beach and sees a homely chick with no arms and legs. She's crying loudly, so he asks what's wrong.

"I'm 18 and never been kissed". Well she's ugly but the guy feels sorry and obliges. But she continues crying, and he asks what's wrong now.

"I've never had my breasts fondled". Again feeling sorry for the limbless girl, he rubs her . But the sobbing gets even worse. He wonders what possibly could be the matter, now.

"I've never been fukked", she says.

Having had enough he picks her up and throws her in the ocean.

Walking away he's heard to say: "Now you're fukked".

[Panic]

Vegas Dave is a fcuking moderator.

[sickler]

The most dangerous fuk:

[betplom]

see below

[betplom]

A middle aged man walks into the bank and says to the young teller, "I want to open a fυcking checking account".

"Please sir", she replies, "we can't have language like that in here." "Why the fυck not?" he asked. "Sir," Came her retort, "I must ask you to refrain from swearing." "I don't give a shit what you want," he answers, "I just want to open a fυcking checking account."

With this the teller leaves and returns in a moment with her branch manager. The manager asks if he might be able to help the gentleman.

"Shit yes", came the reply, "I just won 14 million dollars in the lottery and want to open a fυcking checking account."

The branch manager says, "I see, and this stupid, fυcking cunt is giving you a hard time?"

[Panic]

Vegas Dave, you know I gotta rib ya. Just like I rib CrazyLou.

But here is a good one:

Fcuk.(okay theres the word). An Irishman walks into a bar in Dublin, orders three pints of Guinness and sits in the back of the room, drinking a sip out of each one in turn. When he finishes them, he comes back to the bar and orders three more. The bartender asks him, "You know, a pint goes flat after I draw it; it would taste better if you bought one at a time." The Irishman replies, "Well, you see, I have two brothers. One is in America, the other in Australia, and I'm here in Dublin. When we all left home, we promised that we'd drink this way to remember the days when we drank together." The bartender admits that this is a nice custom, and leaves it there.

The Irishman becomes a regular in the bar, and always drinks the same way: ordering three pints and drinking them in turn. One day, he comes in and orders two pints. All the other regulars notice and fall silent. When he comes back to the bar for the second round, the bartender says, "I don't want to intrude on your grief, but I wanted to offer my condolences on your great loss." The Irishman looks confused for a moment, then a light dawns in his eye and he laughs. "Oh, no," he says, "Everyone's fine. I've just quit drinking."

[pico]

A middle aged man walks into the bank and says to the young teller, "I want to open a fυcking checking account".

"Please sir", she replies, "we can't have language like that in here." "Why the fυck not?" he asked. "Sir," Came her retort, "I must ask you to refrain from swearing." "I don't give a shit what you want," he answers, "I just want to open a fυcking checking account."

With this the teller leaves and returns in a moment with her branch manager. The manager asks if he might be able to help the gentleman.

"Shit yes", came the reply, "I just won 14 million dollars in the lottery and want to open a fυcking checking account."

The branch manager says, "I see, and this stupid, fυcking cunt is giving you a hard time?"

[Willie Bee]

willie, i don;t get the joke

One day you will.

[betplom]

[sickler]

Thread started by SBR employee with a fuk theme when the word is censored here.

****
****!!!!!!!
****!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[reno cool]

Who knew. Panic was good for something. But I don't get Willie's joke either.

[Shortstop]

A guy is walking on the beach and sees a homely chick with no arms and legs. She's crying loudly, so he asks what's wrong.

"I'm 18 and never been kissed". Well she's ugly but the guy feels sorry and obliges. But she continues crying, and he asks what's wrong now.

"I've never had my breasts fondled". Again feeling sorry for the limbless girl, he rubs her . But the sobbing gets even worse. He wonders what possibly could be the matter, now.

"I've never been fukked", she says.

Having had enough he picks her up and throws her in the ocean.

Walking away he's heard to say: "Now you're fukked".

[CarpeDime]

"I don't understand some brothers. I really don't. I'm for real yall. Like my boy Craig, let me tell yall what this ***** did. My boy Craig was getting ready to fuk this b*tch right? He getting ready to FUK this b*tch, you hear what I'm telling you?? So yo check out what this fool did. He went down on this b*tch right? You know what I'm saying, he went downtown, lotta brothers don't do that now, but my boy Craig, he do. Then he come up to fuk this b*tch, and that fool gonna put on a condom! I was like yo Craig - you done already ate the disease! What the fuk you gonna put a condom on for?? Stupid ass."

[payingthejuice]

Brandon "The Losing Fcuk" Lang

[Art Vandeleigh]

Knock knock

Who's there?

Fcukin' cargo

Fcukin' cargo who?

Fcukin' car go "beep beep"
Fcukin' Willie go "Fiveteamer you're banned for another month"