Christmas: A Wonderful PAGAN Holiday

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  • ritehook
    SBR MVP
    • 08-12-06
    • 2244

    #1
    Christmas: A Wonderful PAGAN Holiday
    Burp!

    Yes, feeding, drinking glog, and being generally festive, over the barn birth of some kid in Judea around 2000 years ago.

    But let's cut the carp. As the hours wind down on Xmas day let's look at raw facts.

    Very few of us not in sackcloth and ashes celebrate much of anthing except that we survived one more year. And a tough year it was, if not for us personally than for a lot of our fellow countrymen.

    That is, if we even acknowledge that anonymous shadows in soup lines are in fact our countrymen.

    Long before a charismatic Jewish lad named Yeshua appeared (allegedly, the Gospels are the only evidence of his existence - tho religions always seem to be started up by charismatic individuals who have a powerful effect on their contemporaries) there were celebrations by many pagan cults at this time of year.

    The winter solstice, the celebration of life in the midst of cold dark winter. It's where the decorated tree comes from - Germanic peasants for millenia celebrated a Tree of Life in mid-winter.

    Internal evidence in the New Testament (according to the intelligent fundmentalits of the Armstorng radio empire, and publishers of The Plain Truth magazine) indicated that Yeshua was born in early October.

    Later church fathers moved the date to co-incide with the winter solstice.

    The virgin birth was nothing new. Anyone who was somebody in the ancient world claimed to be born of a virgin, or had the claim made for him.

    Alexander the Great so claimed - it means a god impregnated Mom by magical means, not the usual dirty deed. Caesar also so claimed,or had the claim made for him.

    It gave a cult or a leader a nice cachet.

    And the RC Church is full of pagan symbolism - they had to adapt the new religion into the pageantry of the old ones.

    So embrace your tree before you toss in in a few days, and down the hatch with the magic wine.

    Merry Solstice!
  • flyingillini
    SBR Aristocracy
    • 12-06-06
    • 41219

    #2
    Ritehook, I always can count on you to give me something worth while to read!
    המוסד‎
    המוסד למודיעין ולתפקידים מיוחדים‎
    Comment
    • Willie Bee
      SBR Posting Legend
      • 02-14-06
      • 15726

      #3
      Originally posted by ritehook
      But let's cut the carp. As the hours wind down on Xmas day let's look at raw facts.
      Hmmm, I do recall having seafood for one holiday dinner, but don't believe it was carp. The 'cutting out of the carp,' is this an annual tradition for you and your family? Is it similar to the stabbing of the haggis on Burns Night?
      Comment
      • nasty
        SBR Rookie
        • 12-04-08
        • 5

        #4
        Salute Ritehook!
        Enjoyed reading this one…
        Comment
        • Robyn
          SBR Hall of Famer
          • 02-05-08
          • 9681

          #5
          Ooooooooh, very nice! I am sure moneyline will be making an appearance in this thread. That is, unless he is traveling the world with balcony girl.
          Comment
          • Mudcat
            Restricted User
            • 07-21-05
            • 9287

            #6
            Perhaps this thread is an appropriate place to say a few words about the origin of Festivus:



            Frank Costanza: Many Christmases ago, I went to buy a doll for my son. I reached for the last one they had, but so did another man. As I rained blows upon him, I realized there had to be another way.

            Cosmo Kramer: What happened to the doll?

            Frank Costanza: It was destroyed. But out of that a new holiday was born: a Festivus for the rest of us!



            My wishes to my fellow Festivus celebrants:

            May your aluminum pole have a high strength-to-weight ratio.

            May you have success wrestling the head of your household to the floor.
            Comment
            • ritehook
              SBR MVP
              • 08-12-06
              • 2244

              #7
              Originally posted by Willie Bee
              Hmmm, I do recall having seafood for one holiday dinner, but don't believe it was carp. The 'cutting out of the carp,' is this an annual tradition for you and your family? Is it similar to the stabbing of the haggis on Burns Night?
              Funny. Living in a Texas mountain shack sharpens the wit.

              Actually, I used to occassionally post on a business website, where the use of the word "crap" was verboten. So everyone got around it by writing carp, a habit I sometimes lapse into. Well, what the fukk.
              Comment
              • ritehook
                SBR MVP
                • 08-12-06
                • 2244

                #8
                Originally posted by flyingillini
                Ritehook, I always can count on you to give me something worth while to read!
                Yeah, nothin' like that ol' solstice glog to blow the brains
                Comment
                • ritehook
                  SBR MVP
                  • 08-12-06
                  • 2244

                  #9
                  Originally posted by nasty
                  Salute Ritehook!
                  Enjoyed reading this one…
                  Salud! as they say south of the border.

                  And I'm tasting a beer they sell down there only at this time of year: Noche Buena. Like, Chirstmas Eve. But it's so potent (stronger than Dos Equis) that one bottle has you passed out for both xmas and New Years
                  Comment
                  • ritehook
                    SBR MVP
                    • 08-12-06
                    • 2244

                    #10
                    Originally posted by Mudcat
                    Perhaps this thread is an appropriate place to say a few words about the origin of Festivus:



                    Frank Costanza: Many Christmases ago, I went to buy a doll for my son. I reached for the last one they had, but so did another man. As I rained blows upon him, I realized there had to be another way.

                    Cosmo Kramer: What happened to the doll?

                    Frank Costanza: It was destroyed. But out of that a new holiday was born: a Festivus for the rest of us!


                    My wishes to my fellow Festivus celebrants:

                    May your aluminum pole have a high strength-to-weight ratio.

                    May you have success wrestling the head of your household to the floor.
                    Amen to that, bro. Tho I confess to being a disciple of the god Dionysus. Or maybe Bacchus. Whatever.
                    Comment
                    • ritehook
                      SBR MVP
                      • 08-12-06
                      • 2244

                      #11
                      Originally posted by Robyn
                      Ooooooooh, very nice! I am sure moneyline will be making an appearance in this thread. That is, unless he is traveling the world with balcony girl.
                      Whosever be thy servants moneyline and balcony girl, surely they be following the Star of Bethlehem, to the Greater Glory of God, across hill and dale -----

                      Until blasted into purgatory by a shell from the Israel Defense Forces.
                      Comment
                      • Bread
                        SBR Posting Legend
                        • 03-16-08
                        • 23726

                        #12
                        Originally posted by ritehook
                        Whosever be thy servants moneyline and balcony girl, surely they be following the Star of Bethlehem, to the Greater Glory of God, across hill and dale -----

                        Until blasted into purgatory by a shell from the Israel Defense Forces.

                        That's pretty f'd up Ritehook. I like it.
                        Comment
                        • nosniboR11
                          SBR Posting Legend
                          • 09-02-08
                          • 10042

                          #13
                          ritehook you have been prayed for , becuase you need it
                          Comment
                          • ritehook
                            SBR MVP
                            • 08-12-06
                            • 2244

                            #14
                            Originally posted by nosniboR11
                            ritehook you have been prayed for , becuase you need it
                            Many thanks, my cup runneth over.

                            The blesssings of all the gods that ever were or ever will be descend on you this bowl and NFL playoff season.

                            And, verily, thoughout thy entire life
                            Comment
                            • nosniboR11
                              SBR Posting Legend
                              • 09-02-08
                              • 10042

                              #15
                              I forgot to add that I need it also rite, have a good bowl season and a good year
                              Comment
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