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lol both of your threads are greatOriginally Posted by DangerousOne
Not only did you come into my thread to post your personal vendetta against this guy (and he's a pretty good hoops capper) but you double posted and that breaks one of my rules.
For those of you that enjoy this thread check out my new thread "The Imaginary Bowl Series" http://www.sportsbookreview.com/forum/college-fo...wl-series.html
34. Should've Covered Guy - In my head when I picture Should've Covered Guy I see Uncle Rico. You know Napoleon Dynamite's uncle... "How much you wanna make a bet I can throw a football over them mountains? Yeah. Coach woulda put me in fourth quarter, we would've been state champions. No doubt. No doubt in my mind."
The great thing about the Should've covered guy is that he turns into the lovechild of John Madden & Mike Fratello the next day diagramming plays & breaking down tape explaining why his team didn't cover. You also know his brother Would've covered Guy who likes to explain his capping deficiancies to all of us by becoming Captain obvious... "Yup, Stanford would've covered if they just stopped Oregon in the 2nd half"... Really??? ya think??? So when you see should've or his brother would've just remember... Fade the whole family.
35. I'm new to this site. However I am a very accomplished sports bettor, who has made a lot of $$$ for people over the years. I was once a favorite of some mafia underlings and spent many days rubbing elbows with Vegas Big Shots Guy - Why so cynical guys? Of course this guy is legit!!! I saw this in a movie once. Mafia hitman w/ a heart of Gold... concience starts to get to him... can't kill women & children... they come after him... he goes rogue on message boards... or something like that. Listen guys, if he wasn't a mafia underling wouldn't he not use those avatars? Also he breaks at least 4 other rules (#'s 11,20,24,30) as far as I can tell. Fade this Sammy-like pretender!!!
Just to recap:
I wanted to start a thread that everyone could chime in and list who's advice they take into consideration when making their picks and who you just check their thread hoping you don't have the same picks. Before you list make sure you follow these rules...
NEVER FOLLOW THESE GUYS
1. Guy with Favorite Team in Nickname - Sorry UCSB Slug Fan, Badger Backer, Gator Guy, or Golden Gopher Gambler. I have a hard time believing "this" guy can be an objective capper.
2. Guy with any drug refrence in avatar or name - Really? Cannabis Capper? High Handicapper? I should be taking your advice on College Football? However I will listen when you list your favorite in-game munchies (I hope that thread is coming soon)
3. ALL CAPS GUY - WHY ARE YOU YELLING ABOUT YOUR PICKS? WHEN YOU LEARN TO MASTER THE CAPS LOCK FUNCTION ON YOUR LAPTOP I WILL PAY ATTENTION TO YOUR THREAD. UNTIL THEN... I'm gonna need you to keep it down.
4. Guarantee Guy - Guarantee guy (aka Lock of the lifetime guy) always makes my fade list. Why wouldn't you guarantee a result in a game that YOUR NOT PLAYING IN?
5. Captain Cliche - This guy will attempt to fool you with terms like "This smells like a trap game" or "I see this as a let down game" then thrown in great forum words like sharps, squares, and chalk. No helpful stats or info supporting his arguement... just cool words.
6. System Guy - Everytime I hear someone talk about their system I think about when Bart asked Homer about his system and he whispered to him "I dont tell your mother how much $$$ I lose".
7. Hot Chick Avatar Guy - I like this guy... never wins but I really do like this guy.
8. Guy who makes list making fun of 90% of the forum - He gets a pass.
9. Double post Guy
10. the "Wants to bet all of you" guy. This guy offers 1,000,000,000 imaginary points with a healthy reserve of Schrute Bucks and Stanley Nickles to anyone wanting to bet against him on the forum. Between 100's of sports books online, local bookies, weekend in vegas, or some friendly bets w/ his buddies he still has to BET THE HOUSE and bet it against ALL OF YOU!!! This guy is an angry gambler and when he does move out of his moms basement we'll all be sorry. But until then... stay angry my friend!!!
11. Mega unit Guy - At the end of the year he's down 330 units, of course that's only $3.30.
12. 96 New Threads A day Guy - You can tell he spends all his time capping.
13. 14th In Game Thread Guy - Making sure everyone is not denied the opportunity to share their thoughts
14. Bodily Function Description Guy - I hate this guy. This guy explains why his team didn't cover with feces to cover up his lack of verbal skills. "Pittsburgh took a big dump in the 4th quarter" or "Georgia took a crap all over this game". This fade capper is tough to see in advance because you don't know that he's Bodily Function Description Guy until after the game when he's explaining why his team didn't cover. If your Sunday morning post includes my team took a poop, crap, sh*t, piss or any other bodily function you are fade guy #14 The Bodily Function Description guy.
15. Wrong Name Guy - Easy to spot Wrong Name Guy. He does a whole write-up about how Deshawn Robinson is the heisman frontrunner and thinks Kellen Clemmons is the best quarterback ever to come out of Boise St. He thought Ryan Matthews threw the ball well against Alabama and has stat knowlege letting you how Nate Newton is also leading Auburn in rushing. But if you ever follow Wrong Name Guy it's your own fault because well... you know this guy. He's also in your Fantasy league trying to decide whether to darft Adrian Patterson or Chris Jackson with the 1st pick, has no idea which Steve Smith he drafted, thought he got a steal when he took Kurt Warner in the 7th, and every year asks somewhere aound the 12th round "Did anyone take Drew Brees yet?" Yes Bobby (everyone says at the same time while enunciating both words and rolling their eyes) . Other ways to identify this guy are he drafted 4 kickers, is most likely someone's cousin or brother in the league AND he is probably the catcher on your softball team. Hope you enjoyed. GL ALL
16. Sucker in the Room - You can spot this fade capper by his pleading for the forum to follow his picks because "Vegas really screwed up this time". His thread usually contains the phrase "Am I the only one that likes ___ this week?" Of course you are, Of course you are. He is always present in the forum and fading him pays well so keep an eye out for him, however if you are searching for this capper and can't find him, then guess what... There's ALWAYS one in the room.
Note*** Following guy that has Monkey playing guitar avatar will get you down 12 units
17. Awesome QB Guy - This is the guy who always takes the team with a top 5 QB even though they are +7 or more on the road against a top 20 defense. Usually cant name another player on the team other than say.. Christian Ponder, and then is surprised when they lose by 40 to say.. Oklahoma. Awesome QB Guy hasnt figured out the whole good pitching beats good hitting thing. I must admit, I have been guilty of being this a$$hole until I learned whats up.
18. Shameless self promoter in my thread guy
19. The Points Mooch - Ah Yes, The Points Mooch. This fade monster can ONLY be found on the SBR forum and does not share his knowledge with the rest of us to help out his follow man, show how smart he is, or even for the competition. The points mooch is only in it only for the precious betpoints and has no problem asking for them IE... "Can you help a fellow capper out". Maybe he saving up for that medium Papa Johns cheese pizza or an overpriced music player, but you know that he is a fader because if you win games you make REAL DOLLARS AND CAN BUY THAT STUFF ANYWAY. On a completely unrelated topic I was unhappy w/ my IPOD recently and returned it to the Apple store where I purchased it from. I informed the sales associate that I would like my refund in betpoints. Long story short 45 minutes and 11 confused sales clerks later... I am the proud owner of 1 MILLION POINTS because... Whoever dies w/ the most points wins?
20. The Sammy - How legendary of a fader are you when you get your own category. He's not wrong name guy or system guy (although he does break rules # 3,4,10,11,& 16). HE'S HIS OWN FRIGGIN CATEGORY. I can't stop reading his thread... it's like crack to a capper, some of the best fade material ANYWHERE. No stats, no write ups, no analysis only guarantees how he will leave the forum if his $90,000 play that he has to drive to Vegas to place doesn't hit. All the bright colors, bling-bling emoticons (I think that will be guy #21), million unit plays, motivational speeches, & ALL CAPS capping make Sammy's thread BAR NONE (like William Floyd) the most entertaining thread in the world make even that Dos Equis guy proud. He even has Sammy-ism's like .... MY WORD IN LIFE MEANS A LOT, WHETHER YOU ALL BELIEVE IT OR NOT, I AM VERY INFLUENTIAL AND HAVE A MIND THAT SEEMS TO GO DEEPER THAN THE EYE CAN SEE. I can't make that stuff up, I actually cut & pasted it from his thread. However as entertaining as his is, at the end of the when you break 5 rules on the list you can't help but becoming.... Fader #20 The Sammy.Congrats to all of you that got my William Floyd reference.
21. Incorrect Emoticon Guy - First of all I am not an emotocist (some of my best friends are emoticons). All I'm saying is if you use certain emoticons or certain emoticons incorrectly you cannot be taken seriously and you are #21 Incorrect Emoticon Guy. Lets review:
This emoticon cannot be used to mean we cashed in. It can only be used if you have recently purchased a shiny new tooth or you're sportin' a new watch. Have you ever seen a serious capper include this in his thread?
or or
These break rule #14.
This one is cruel to "special" emoticons
No seasonal emoticons.
This one just makes me uncomfortable
No endangered emoticons
You will not use this emoticon... You will not use this emoticon... you will not use this emoticon.
I'm just not sure this one is consentual and I don't think the smaller emoticon is 18.
At 1st glance I thought this one was OK, but after reviewing this is absolutely goaltending and we won't have that in our forum.
If your emoticon is carrying a sign you clearly don't understand emoticons
&*%&^%$##$^**^%$#@)(**%%
No Dennis Rodman emoticons
I SAID NO DENNIS RODMAN EMOTICONS.
Please feel free to add to the list. 1 point for every GOOD reason we shouldn't use an emoticon.
22. Game was fixed guy AKA The Conspiracy Kid - How tiny is your universe if you're starting threads w/ "the game was fixed"? Your $10 bet was just not enough to make Northwestern lay down last week in the final minute. Chances are that Oswald killed Kennedy, Al Queda was behind 9/11, & we did land on the moon. If you EVER claim that you lost a game because it was fixed you are a fader.
23. Random Stats Guy - This fader causes mass hysteria w/ his guessing of mythical stats. He will tell you Tim Tebow never lost on Ramadan, Ty Detmer was winless against teams with crustaceans as mascots, Hampton college is 12-0 against the spread again vs teams that start w/ Q, and guarantee that Wyoming has never lost on a Monday night (I'm pretty sure that's true). R.S.G. is a heavy drinker and I'm guessing a scratch golfer.
24. Inside Tip Guy - This master of fades usually hangs out in the horse racing forum but from time to time he shows up on our side. 50% made up info, 50% something he heard on sports talk radio = 100% fade material. There are 2 different types of Inside Tip Guys. The 1st you can identify 3 ways. 1st of all he has a moustache and uses moustache wax (like he's a 1930's villain that ties people to railroad tracks.) 2nd He will be holding a folded over newspaper. 3rd He will ALWAYS whisper the tip to you. So if a moustached man holding a folded up newspaper whispers his potential winners to you... fade it hard. The 2nd is probably wearing a track suit, he's weighted down with a huge gold chain (probably more than 1), has a Jersey accent (whether he's from Jersey or not) and says things like bada bing & f-get about it. So when Joey Bag-a-Donuts lets you in on his big play for the week... well you know.
25. Random Comment Guy - Random comment guy pops up in a thread called "Who is your Heisman Frontrunner" and posts "Are the Banana Slugs a real team". He holds up a sign at the game that says "I LIKE CHEESE". The problem w/ Random Comment Guy is you can't fade him because... he never make picks or offers any information. "The weather is nice in Saskatoon today"... What am I supposed to do w/ that?
Please stop writing so much random stuff before you break the internet.
26. The Self Loather - This fadester is will always consider himself a "hard luck" gambler saying things like "fade me and you'll win" or "I haven't been so hot lately so you might want to fade me". This no risk all reward approach makes me sick... If you lose "we'll I said I was gonna lose" but if you win "I'm the greatest capper ever"... no risk all reward. Put yourself out there, make a pick, and stand by your convictions. If you win I'll probably say it was luck and if you lose I'll make fun of you... no risk all reward for me too.
27. If I Don't Win I'll leave guy - OK before we touch on this fader we must review. Namath over here broke at least 3 rules in this one post. 1.You don't guarantee wins in games your not playing in. (Rule #4), 2. I got an inside tip (Rule #24) and our newest rule (Rule 27) If I don't win this bet I'll leave this forum forever. This fadeoppotomus threatens you with the same threat I used when i was 9 (and probably in every adult relationship in my life)... if i'm not right I'll leave. It's very mature and many serious cappers use this strategy, right? On top of that you finished your post with your very scientific breakdown... "UCF is a way better overall team than Houston"... how much tape did you break down to get this info? We appreciate all the hard work you did capping this one. I really wanted to cheer for UCF but I will probably find myself a Cougar Fan 2 nite. In closing, If you don't like this post I'll take my ball & go home. (insert icon of bratty kid crying here)
28. The Belly-acher - AKA The Sore Loser. If they were dogs they would be Chu wah-wah's or mellan-collies. You don't know that this guy is a fader until after the game ends and you get to read his post game rant, which usually starts like this "FUK VA TECH, THE GAME WAS FIXED, SCREW URBAN MEYER, U SUCK DENNARD" and so on. Now does a respectable capper go off like this??? Of course not. This is a guy who just blew 80% of his bankroll. When you see this post game flurry of obscenities make sure you add this guy to your fader list or else you will find yourself the next guy typing MOTH%#FUC#ING JOHN BRANTLEY...
29. The Bromantic - This anti-capper will not wow you with trends or break down last weeks tape. His thread will only have 1 player per team that he offers any info about and I call this the man crush breakdown. It goes a little like this... "Auburn will win because they have Cam Newton on their team" or "Dennard Robinson is the reason Michigan comes out on top". He is your typical sportscenter capper (if they don't say his name on sportscenter, he doesn't know who they are), maybe because his wife won't let him watch any games or because he's busy downloading Tim Tebow underwear adds, I don't know. The Bromatic or mancrusher falls in love with a different player every game only to have his heart broken weekly. But it'll be OK... so go dry your eyes, get yourself some chocolate chip cookie dough, pop in Thelma & Louise (again), because Andrew Luck's pro style might not be the one but there's always a Jake Locker's dreamy play action. On a side note if I have to listen to Mike Golic talk about Peton Hillis' arms for another minute or hear Greeny Santecize (that's a combination of Sanchez and Fantesize) I will have to stab myself in the eye.
30. The "New-to-this-forum-but-have-been-on-fire-this-year-hitting-90%-last-500-picks-so-I-wanted-to-share-my-picks-with-random-people-I've-never-met-before" Guy - This Karnak of College Football gives you the hard sell as soon as you open up his thread like your in the Vacation Time Share Forum. With all the ethusiasm of an infommercial Billy Mays over here is pushing the picks on you in a hurry (too soon?). He throws out potential winners with so much confidence you actually start to believe him until... "take Arizona Tech and the points". Please tell me new guy doesn't think that there is an Arizona Tech. Great call DR
31. Hurry pound it now guy - It a past life this fader was a baker or maybe a late pornstar (what other profession can you run around screaming POUND IT NOW?), but now he's the eager beaver in the forum looking for all the other lemmings to jump into his thread and agree w/ him. Pound it now guy starts his thread on Monday with something like "FSU is getting 3 boys POUND IT NOW" (notice the all caps which breaks another rule). His Tuesday thread reads "Sh*t, I didn't know Ponder was out". In conclusion never POUND IT NOW!!
Will be back w/ more to say 2nite
32. Rivalry Game Guy - Had to do it. I know even good cappers say it but please don't be that guy. Do you really think players play harder because it's a "rivalry" game. I lived in Gainesville for a while and I had to hear how the Gators were gonna open the season against Tennessee in a heated rivalry, then later in the year a hated rivalry game vs Georgia in Jacksonville, and end the year play against fierce in state rival FSU... Do you see where this is going? I was waiting on the game vs the FAMU rattlers so people could say "The Reptilian Rivalry Game is a big one". Read the definition of rival: One who attempts to equal or surpass another, or who pursues the same object as another; a competitor THAT'S WHAT EVERY TEAM YOU PLAY AGAINST DOES. The better team wins, emotion only lasts a few minutes, and chicks dig scars (Keanu Reeves maybe have said the thing about the scars, but the rest is true). It's all just hype & it's not fair to Uconn. I'm sorry you're the only school in your state, that's not my fault. Maybe Rhode Island will start a rivalry w/ you.
33. The Bulletin Board Bully - This angry fader reverts back to his 8th great days when he finds a game he likes. If you're not with him... you're against him and he'll let you know it with verbal assaults and cyberweggies reminding us all that anybody on a computer is 6"8 350. The only way to beat a bully is to fade a bully and the BBB is no exception. I read one today that said "F*ck anyone who's betting against San Diego". So angry... Count to 10 backwards, think happy thoughts, and relax Bully because... (Scroll Down)
THAT'S 2 FOR FLINCHING
34. Should've Covered Guy - In my head when I picture Should've Covered Guy I see Uncle Rico. You know Napoleon Dynamite's uncle... "How much you wanna make a bet I can throw a football over them mountains? Yeah. Coach woulda put me in fourth quarter, we would've been state champions. No doubt. No doubt in my mind."
The great thing about the Should've covered guy is that he turns into the lovechild of John Madden & Mike Fratello the next day diagramming plays & breaking down tape explaining why his team didn't cover. You also know his brother Would've covered Guy who likes to explain his capping deficiancies to all of us by becoming Captain obvious... "Yup, Stanford would've covered if they just stopped Oregon in the 2nd half"... Really??? ya think??? So when you see should've or his brother would've just remember... Fade the whole family.
35. I'm new to this site. However I am a very accomplished sports bettor, who has made a lot of $$$ for people over the years. I was once a favorite of some mafia underlings and spent many days rubbing elbows with Vegas Big Shots Guy - Why so cynical guys? Of course this guy is legit!!! I saw this in a movie once. Mafia hitman w/ a heart of Gold... concience starts to get to him... can't kill women & children... they come after him... he goes rogue on message boards... or something like that. Listen guys, if he wasn't a mafia underling wouldn't he not use those avatars? Also he breaks at least 4 other rules (#'s 11,20,24,30) as far as I can tell. Fade this Sammy-like pretender!!!
I think I have two more to add. These are just suggestions, as you are the captain of this thread and can deem these added to the list or not. I just love your writeups you do on the people. Feel free to add at will.
36. "The Porn Stiff"
Guy who lays it all on the line by stating who he is betting on and why, with the broken promises ofand ass passwords to masturbation websites if he is wrong.
37. "where is my free porn guy"
Those who earn their daily points just coming to #36's thread and bashing him for not giving them the key to pornographic adventures he promised, while remaining unaware you can view porn just by googling "naked whores"
Hey Dangerous......I found Rochester Titans thread but cant find the others. I've seen HarryNLLoyds and GivemeaBJ's before but cant remember what sport they were in......any help would be appreciated!! thanks!
"the madden capper"
This is the one that is willing not only to wager money based on a video game performance, but encourages you to do so as well. Lets not short his effort though, sometimes he simulates these games 5 sometimes 10 times or more to get a more 'accurate' prediction. He will even use other random things to try and sway you to become a believer by saying
"I even made the simulations all thursday night games with random weather so it would factor that in as well"
"I downloaded the updated injury reports and rosters too so it cant miss"
"I told my xbox that brett farve was being sued for sex text, brady's wife was making out with some random dude, and chad ochocinco has crabs so it could also calculate these factors in as well"
"Dont forget to get the props bet on r mendenhall, he averaged over 150 yards per game over these 100 simulations"
we need this thread pinned so we can easily classify people like 'sportsbettingguy'
This thread has grown to be my favorite
This is the funniest thread out there. Next to "I like big buts ..." thread my new favorite.
Is this #18 or #25??
Or make a new one "thread hijacker guy"
#38 - "The attention whore" - The guy who posts their picks in the players talk forum instead of the proper sub-forum for whichever sport they are wagering on. They most likely don't have any real money on the game, and are really only concerned with getting as many replies as possible (good or bad) to feel like part of the "in" crowd of the forum.
I believe I have encountered every one of these guys mentioned on this list. I do not consider myself a capper or anything like that but I post my weekly NFL plays and I just noticed that I use ALL CAPS to make my plays ... lol ... anyways I will now change my style of posting to get off this list.
In my endevers of being a part of this forum I have come to a conclusion that the "I know a guy on the team ..." and the "I have a friend that knows a guy on the team ..." are by far the dumbest (which automatically makes them the funniest) guys to at least read. Once agian this is my 3 cents and thank you for posting this thread.
Alright guys. My 1st post of the new season... Good Luck to all of you & make sure you brush up on who not to follow. If you see Harry Lloyd's column follow him he's pretty accurate.
after a bad day, HE reminds you that " its a marathon not a sprint " guy .. $$$ management.. BUT we'll get it back 2marrow..gl this up and coming season.. L2P2
Last edited by Luv2Play2; 09-01-11 at 04:56 PM.
39. anyone with stroke as their username,
they may be operating with a sticky keyboard.
LOL, when I saw the title of the thread I wasn't expecting this
CLASSIC
great thread
This year, FADE ME!!!!! I wish I could but my bets are already made by the time I know what to fade....
you sir are a jackass......names mean nothing
#40. Guy who calls me a Jackass
Great thread! Thanks for the laughs (and I mean it)! Really wasn't expecting it.
The OP isn't lying. Bump.
I remember this thread.
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