1. 02-20-14 05:03 PM #71
    Lowly Oaftard
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    Fresh off of ANOTHER TOURNAMENT VICTORY ( TOP PRIZE - 1ST PLACE), it is clearly becoming EVIDENT that I have THE KEY to UNLOCK the mysteries of success at SBR TOURNAMENT POKER. To celebrate another DOMINANT VICTORY ( winning all the chips in PLAY yet AGAIN), I have decided to GENEROUSLY SHARE another element of the STRATEGY that makes me the GREATEST TOURNAMENT PLAYER in SBR HISTORY. Without further ADO, let's get into some TIPS:

    Today's tip is fairly simple and straight forward ( You're welcome, user PAVYRACER - I know you like simplicity), and involves one of the most CRITICAL things in online poker : TIMING. Some players apply theoretically correct poker strategy in spots ( unlike poster Triple_D_Bet ), yet ignore WHEN they and other players PERFORM THEIR ACTIONS. On SBR Poker, the timing of PREFLOP ACTION is CRITICAL to your chances of winning AT SHOWDOWN. With UNSUITED HOLDINGS, make sure you perform your preflop action ( CALL OR RAISE) BEFORE less than 3 TICKS EXPIRE ON THE GREEN TIMER BAR. With suited holdings, make sure you wait until AT LEAST 3 CLICKS HAVE PASSED before performing your preflop action. These elements of timing trigger a FRACTAL MODIFICATION in the sequences the RANDOM NUMBER GENERATOR utilizes in it's card selection algorithm, impacting the HAND DISTRIBUTION in a favorable manner towards YOUR HOLDING. Use this TIP and watch YOUR RESULTS IMPROVE as you STOCKPILE TOURNAMENT WINS!

    PS - I have noticed QUITE A FEW users in this forum ADOPT my UNIQUE writing style emphasizing key PHRASES AND POINTS with caps. Kudos to you posters - the extra SPICE and FLAVOR added to your posts is nothing short of AMAZING.

    PPS - Poster Mike Jamm - It is unfortunate that your jealousy and envy compels you to spew hateful commentary towards MYSELF and other users who simply SEEK TO IMPROVE their tournament poker. Nonetheless, I encourage you to employ my tips and advice, offered to you without malice, and I earnestly bid you good luck in your GAMBLING ENDEAVORS. I would politely suggest that you be a little more open minded though...it would probably improve both your gambling success and quality of life ( which I'm speculating ranges somewhere between living in your parents basement, and under an overpass on a busy highway). Best wishes to YOU, sir.
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  2. 02-20-14 06:33 PM #72
    sinmiedo
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    very impress, i must say.
    i m just wondering what kind of keyboard you use when you play live
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  3. 02-20-14 06:36 PM #73
    Lowly Oaftard
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    Quote Originally Posted by sinmiedo View Post
    very impress, i must say.
    i m just wondering what kind of keyboard you use when you play live
    My strategies revolve around exploiting flaws in RNG algorithms and predicting trends in rigged poker. In live poker, I just use poker strategy and table selection. LDO
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  4. 02-20-14 06:43 PM #74
    hockey216
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    how do you exploit a random number generator?

    umm... its random.

    no i dont believe you have magic wand and can affect odds by useless tactics.

    if it were true, why don't you have $100 Million dollars and why aren't you playing 2,000/4,000 NL?

    This is bafoonery by a conspiracy theorist.

    Last edited by hockey216; 02-20-14 at 06:54 PM.
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  5. 02-20-14 06:48 PM #75
    hockey216
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    come play me at 10/20 NL and see how well your "RNG algorithm exploiter" works.


    Last edited by hockey216; 02-20-14 at 06:54 PM.
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  6. 02-20-14 09:23 PM #76
    Triple_D_Bet
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    Quote Originally Posted by hockey216 View Post
    come play me at 10/20 NL and see how well your "RNG algorithm exploiter" works.


    Won't happen hockey...oaf's just a troll who refuses to accept the outcomes of 12 million hands on bovada that prove it's not rigged
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  7. 02-20-14 10:26 PM #77
    sinmiedo
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    Quote Originally Posted by hockey216 View Post
    come play me at 10/20 NL and see how well your "RNG algorithm exploiter" works.


    he is looking at a new keyboard before he plays you
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  8. 02-20-14 10:36 PM #78
    BeerDog99
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    LOL, this is priceless!
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  9. 02-20-14 10:41 PM #79
    sinmiedo
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    Quote Originally Posted by BeerDog99 View Post
    LOL, this is priceless!
    Ssshhhhh....h.e does not know about my mental abilities!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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  10. 02-21-14 04:32 PM #80
    Lowly Oaftard
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    Quote Originally Posted by sinmiedo View Post
    Ssshhhhh....h.e does not know about my mental abilities!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    That was a well played contest yesterday! Better luck next time.
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  11. 02-21-14 05:32 PM #81
    bobbywaves
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lowly Oaftard View Post
    Some players apply theoretically correct poker strategy in spots ( unlike poster Triple_D_Bet ).
    Spot on assessment.
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  12. 02-21-14 07:50 PM #82
    smitch124
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    Quote Originally Posted by shari91 View Post
    If everyone at the table is pushing the left shift key, then what happens?
    The chat is in all caps
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  13. 02-21-14 08:03 PM #83
    pavyracer
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    LowlyOaftard,

    I would like your thoughts on something I observed. How does the RNG work at SBR Poker? I have noticed a player getting AA at least 4 times in a span of 60 min at a tourney. I said at least because these are the times he was on my table and one time he showed his cards and the other 3 went to showdown. Not sure if he had more in other tables before moved to mine. Obviously it is good luck to have the RNG on your side but how does it work? Why would an RNG decide to give someone the same set of cards in such a short span? Is there a magic button to push, like the famous left shift key? I'm pretty sure a genius like yourself will know the answer.
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  14. 02-21-14 09:12 PM #84
    Triple_D_Bet
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    Quote Originally Posted by bobbywaves View Post
    Spot on assessment.
    By which he no doubt means your analytical abilities are on par with his...which most people would agree upon!
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  15. 02-22-14 09:47 AM #85
    bobbywaves
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    No doubt.
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  16. 02-22-14 01:21 PM #86
    yisman
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    Quote Originally Posted by smitch124 View Post
    The chat is in all caps
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  17. 02-28-14 12:59 AM #87
    mikejamm
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    Hey Lowly fuktard! Go fuk yourself! I play live every week and I guarantee I'm up lifetime over your stupid donk ass! I live in a nice house with a hot fuk'in wife and a couple of kids.

    This shit here is a fuk'in past time for me at home and at work, pointing out stupid fuk's like you who think their god's gift to poker at a rigged free points web site. I could give a rats fuk'in as about your stupid dick wad poker method and the idiots who follow you.

    You're full of shit and probably a fat fuk'in loser slob living on welfare. So keep left key shifting dip shit, too bad that's the best fuk'in line of shit you could come up with. Not a good way to gain any credibility at a site full of degenerates, but to each his own newbie douche bag. Some fuk'in desperate idiots would believe the moon is made of cheese if the right dumbass blows enough smoke up their ass.
    Last edited by mikejamm; 03-01-14 at 12:31 AM.
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  18. 02-28-14 04:53 AM #88
    BennyBigNuts
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    Quote Originally Posted by Triple_D_Bet View Post
    Hate to burst YOUR bubble oafy, but your tournament wins are MEANINGLESS...I KNOW for a fact that you were doing NOTHING on your own, colluding with every other PLAYER on the table (don't lie NOW) to have them SHOVE their bad hands (j6 OFF) into you to make you in. I even have the hand histories to prove it!
    You are one pathetic fukkin virgin.
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  19. 02-28-14 11:50 AM #89
    Triple_D_Bet
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    Quote Originally Posted by BennyBigNuts View Post
    You are one pathetic fukkin virgin.
    Of course, that's why I'm an SBR plant...they promised me hookers and blow if I became one
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  20. 02-28-14 11:59 AM #90
    Mitchell88
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    Quote Originally Posted by mikejamm View Post
    Hey Lowly fuktard! Go fuk yourself! I play live every week and I guarantee I'm up lifetime over your stupid donk ass! I live in a nice house with a hot fuk'in wife and a couple of kids.

    This shit here is a fuk'in past time for me at home and at work, pointing out stupid fuk's like you who think their god's gift to poker at a rigged free points web site. I could give a rats fuk'in as about your stupid dick wad poker method and the idiots who follow you.

    You're full of shit and probably a fat fuk'in loser slob living on welfare. So keep left key shifting dip shit, too bad that's the best fuk'in line of shit you could come up with. Not a good way to gain any credibility at a site full of degenerates, but to each his own newbie douche bag. Some fuk'in desperate idiots would believe the moon is make of cheese if the right dumbass blows enough smoke up their ass.
    If this is just a pastime for you why do you act like you might pull the trigger to a shotgun with your toe every other day?
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  21. 02-28-14 08:34 PM #91
    Auto Donk
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    Quote Originally Posted by Triple_D_Bet View Post
    Of course, that's why I'm an SBR plant...they promised me hookers and blow if I became one
    Long Ron, I've got news for you, that wasn't SBullshitR that promised you "hookers and blow", it was that mother penetrating Pat O'Brien!!!
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  22. 03-01-14 12:34 AM #92
    mikejamm
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mitchell88 View Post
    If this is just a pastime for you why do you act like you might pull the trigger to a shotgun with your toe every other day?
    Not me bro, I just laugh at stupid shit and move on. I could seriously not give a fly'in fuk. It would be nice to have a little luck and some true honest variance here, but that will never happen at this fuk'in poker scam shithole!
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  23. 03-01-14 12:41 AM #93
    mikejamm
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    Lowly fuktard = sbr john or some other sbr employee. Doesn't matter what the fuk you do guys, because it's the same bullshit like it's always been. Some fuk'in plant or newbie shows up and somehow miraculously wins a bunch of rigged tourneys and draws attention to it with some lame ass thread with a bullshit so called "technique"

    You notice you don't see sbr employees playing poker under their posting screen names, and it's exactly for this reason. Same old tired ass cheating fuk'in shit they've always done. Same fuk's that were here when they fuk'ed everyone at B.I. are the same ones here now, just different names. All the money stays with the house boys, SBR's low life scam house that is.

    Do you guys honestly think it's true poker variance when Lowly Oafuk wins 6 tourneys in a span of 2 weeks and cleans up in ring games? Give me a fuk'in break, biggest fuk'in rigged debacle here to date.
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  24. 03-01-14 09:04 AM #94
    USCPHILLYGUY
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    mikejams you do make a valid point about the guy.

    Funny bout the AA Theory. Iv now played 3 tourneys and a ring game for about 2 hour and still have not been dealt pocket aces
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  25. 03-01-14 10:06 AM #95
    sinmiedo
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    Quote Originally Posted by USCPHILLYGUY View Post
    mikejams you do make a valid point about the guy.

    Funny bout the AA Theory. Iv now played 3 tourneys and a ring game for about 2 hour and still have not been dealt pocket aces
    there are 52 cards to play poker, and if you are going to wait for AA to make a move, you need to change your strategies.
    I do not remember when I got AA last time, probably 2 month ago, however , I manage to make many final tables ,
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  26. 03-01-14 11:38 AM #96
    BeerDog99
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    Quote Originally Posted by sinmiedo View Post
    there are 52 cards to play poker, and if you are going to wait for AA to make a move, you need to change your strategies.
    I do not remember when I got AA last time, probably 2 month ago, however , I manage to make many final tables ,
    LOL, a little bit of an exaggeration (2 months... :-) but you have a very good point!
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  27. 03-01-14 12:03 PM #97
    sinmiedo
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    My problem is that I do not know how to play big pairs
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  28. 03-01-14 02:08 PM #98
    Auto Donk
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    Quote Originally Posted by sinmiedo View Post
    My problem is that I do not know how to play big pairs
    I titty-fck big pairs every time, raise a pearl necklace on the river!
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  29. 07-02-14 09:48 PM #99
    eidolon
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    Congrats Lowly Oaftard on another win today
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  30. 07-03-14 12:08 AM #100
    BiTeMe UsAdOj
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    Quote Originally Posted by eidolon View Post
    Congrats Lowly Oaftard on another win today
    TY

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  31. 07-03-14 12:17 AM #101
    jbart28
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    subscribed and now on 2p2. This is uber meta leveling at its finest. What were your superuser accounts on absolute? Were you greycat or potripper? Lemme get your screen names so I can OPR you and lemme get your name so I can hendon mob you. Since you are a beast on SBR Poker surely you have tons of live cashes and possibly a circuit ring or 2?
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  32. 07-03-14 12:20 AM #102
    TheMoneyShot
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    What happened to this guy?? Is he still around???
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  33. 07-03-14 12:25 AM #103
    jbart28
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    Confirmed Busto
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  34. 07-03-14 09:47 AM #104
    daneblazer
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    Quote Originally Posted by TheMoneyShot View Post
    What happened to this guy?? Is he still around???
    He won yesterday & 2nd the day before.
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  35. 07-03-14 09:52 AM #105
    daneblazer
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    I need to play more dailies. Haven't played one since the Triathlon. The World Cup gets me about as excited as Andy Reid walking into a Planet Fitness.
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