Originally posted on 08/20/2019:

Okay first of all, your boss is a woman? LOL!

Honestly how could you answer to a woman everyday? Have your balls been sucked all the way up into your body cavity yet?

Here's what you tell her, call her up and tell her that there's something wrong with your eye.

When she asks what's wrong with your eye, say " I just can't see coming in today".

If she does not give you the day off tell human resources that she offered to blow you for extra days off.