1. #1
    Big Bear
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    Calling in sick tomorrow what should I text my boss?

    I am not going to work tomorrow

    is it pretty standard to say

    “hey boss I’m sorry but I can’t make it to work today I’m not feeling well. I’ll be there tomorrow” ?

    does that work?

    I havent called in sick in like 3 years

  2. #2
    Fidel_CashFlow
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    can i see what you look like?

  3. #3
    deltgen
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    You shouldn't. You should be a man and phone him/her, not text.

  4. #4
    BustinNutz
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    Tell him you have a date with a fake girl that you don’t remember what she looks like who won’t let you penetrate her like the other 100 posts you’ve made this year
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  5. #5
    Big Bear
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    Quote Originally Posted by deltgen View Post
    You shouldn't. You should be a man and phone him/her, not text.
    my boss prefers text bc of paper trail. She has to show her boss.

  6. #6
    d2bets
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    Tell her you're boning a chick with celiac disease and you have to make an emergency gluten-free granola bar run.

  7. #7
    Big Bear
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    Quote Originally Posted by d2bets View Post
    Tell her you're boning a chick with celiac disease and you have to make an emergency gluten-free granola bar run.
    okay thanks but can I get a serious answer

    I gotta wake up at 6am to send the text

  8. #8
    Eddy Munny
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    Tell him you're struggling with profound mental illness and you wanna go blow off a little steam at the gun range.

  9. #9
    Big Bear
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    Quote Originally Posted by Eddy Munny View Post
    Tell him you're struggling with profound mental illness and you wanna go blow off a little steam at the gun range.
    oh snap

  10. #10
    Big Bear
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    foreal i need to call in sick and i’m not a good liar

    my boss is going to be pissed but I need something believable

    maybe allergies?

  11. #11
    BrickJames
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    Okay first of all, your boss is a woman? LOL!

    Honestly how could you answer to a woman everyday? Have your balls been sucked all the way up into your body cavity yet?

    Here's what you tell her, call her up and tell her that there's something wrong with your eye.

    When she asks what's wrong with your eye, say " I just can't see coming in today".

    If she does not give you the day off tell human resources that she offered to blow you for extra days off.
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  12. #12
    Booya711
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    Big bear having a job is the most disturbing part of the thread. He doesn’t seem like he could hold a job

  13. #13
    peacebyinches
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    Quote Originally Posted by BrickJames View Post
    Okay first of all, your boss is a woman? LOL!

    Honestly how could you answer to a woman everyday? Have your balls been sucked all the way up into your body cavity yet?

    Here's what you tell her, call her up and tell her that there's something wrong with your eye.

    When she asks what's wrong with your eye, say " I just can't see coming in today".

    If she does not give you the day off tell human resources that she offered to blow you for extra days off.
    This

  14. #14
    Auto Donk
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    tell him you banged the shit out of that herpes-laden bitch and now you got a f'n problem.......



  15. #15
    dbartinbwgc
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    Tell you boss you got the SHITs
    the I dont give a shit and i'm going to take a day off

  16. #16
    BeatTheJerk
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    Tell her you have Conjunctivitis (pink eye) & just rub the shit out of your eye for a solid minute & send her a pic.

  17. #17
    Big Bear
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    calling in sick was easy and painless.

    my boss didnt even question me at all.

    going to start doing that every couple months

  18. #18
    captrobey
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    Tell him " My people are arriving tomorrow to destroy your world . But i like you so i will be spending the day tomorrow asking them to spare your life . No thanks needed ."

  19. #19
    dlowilly
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    Be honest and tell her one of your anal warts exploded

  20. #20
    Big Bear
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    Quote Originally Posted by dlowilly View Post
    Be honest and tell her one of your anal warts exploded
    gross wtf is wrong with you

  21. #21
    Eddy Munny
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    Quote Originally Posted by captrobey View Post
    Tell him " My people are arriving tomorrow to destroy your world . But i like you so i will be spending the day tomorrow asking them to spare your life . No thanks needed ."
    Have you ever called in "abducted by bigfoot?" Because I hear that bigfeets grant just one call per abductee and you wouldn't wanna jeopardize your job status with a no-call, no-show.

  22. #22
    captrobey
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    Quote Originally Posted by Eddy Munny View Post
    Have you ever called in "abducted by bigfoot?" Because I hear that bigfeets grant just one call per abductee and you wouldn't wanna jeopardize your job status with a no-call, no-show.
    Of course i did i just ended up using it too much. But it was not really an abduction because i went all those times willingly.

  23. #23
    cincinnatikid513
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    i'm surprised u have a job u work at mcdonalds don't you
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  24. #24
    Big Bear
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    Quote Originally Posted by cincinnatikid513 View Post
    i'm surprised u have a job u work at mcdonalds don't you
    haha no bro I’m a sales rep

  25. #25
    Itsamazing777
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    what i say is exactly this

    Not feeling well. Puking all night. Going to stay home today.

  26. #26
    Ratpack
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    uti

  27. #27
    themike78
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    Quote Originally Posted by Big Bear View Post
    haha no bro I’m a sales rep
    What exactly do you sell?

  28. #28
    Big Bear
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    Quote Originally Posted by themike78 View Post
    What exactly do you sell?
    I’m in IT sales so phone systems/internet to businesses.

    It’s rough man you gotta have thick skin but hey when you are selling there is money to be made

  29. #29
    cincinnatikid513
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    Quote Originally Posted by Big Bear View Post
    haha no bro I’m a sales rep
    no wonder u ask so many damn questions

  30. #30
    Big Bear
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    sales is the transference of emotion so you gotta have that certainty, confidence, and positivity within you first or there is no way your customer will.

    Lately I have been in a mini slump and it’s definitely my own fault b/c I haven’t been in a great mood... I’m working on that though.

  31. #31
    SBR_Guest_Pro
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    Ya you shouldn't be a pussy and text. Gotta call. I'd write you up for improper call off

  32. #32
    BeatTheJerk
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    Next time tell her to fuk off, that’s what I told my last boss & I’ve actually never laid eyes on him ever again.

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