[SteveRyan]

Okay, well that's not entirely true. Of course he eats food. What's driving me nuts is what he wont eat, or more specifically what he has never even tried.

Case in point - A couple years ago we move into an apartment. Not long after that I am cooking some spaghetti. The spaghetti is boiling and I got some Ragu in a pan staying warm. My roommate comes out of his room:

"What are you cooking; it smells fukkin awful." (Boston accent).
I reply, "It's spaghetti."
"It's fukking nasty; smells awful."
"You dont like spaghetti??"
"No, I can't stand Italian food. It just smells so fukking gross."
"You don't like any Italian food?"

Then we get into thid conversation about all the Italian food he can't stand, which by the way basically includes everything except pizza and he only eats cheese pizza. As it turns out, he has never even tried spaghetti. Spaghetti!!! Never even tried it. Lasagna...NOPE! Never tried that either. Shells....nope! Manicotti...nope! Alfredo....nope!

My mind is blown. To me, the house smells awesome: like little Italy. To him is smells like death.

Several days later, I decided to whip up a batch of chicken salad. It's basically chicken, onion, hard boiled egg, celery, cranberries and mayo. Not a big deal.

He comes home. "What the fukk were you cooking? It's fukkin nasty."
"It's chicken salad."
"Fukkin nasty."
"You ever tried chicken salad?"
"Nope."

The guy is 36 years old. Never tried pasta or chicken salad. Never tried egg salad either.

So then I start grilling him on basic types of food to see if he has ever tried them. Deviled eggs...1 time. Potato salad....maybe 1 time. Then I get to the bottom of it.

He hates condiments. Ketchup, mayo, mustard, ranch, blue cheese or anything similar. Wont touch any of it. So now, this eliminates a whole spectrum of food. He likes BBQ and Teriyaki however.

Not long ago, we head over to Steak N Shake to get a burger and fries. On the way there, I tell him that the best way to get the fries is with the chili and cheese.

"I've never tried it."
"But you've had chili fries before right?"
"Nope. Never tried it."

So I did a little deeper....

"Have you ever tried chili?"
"Nope."

Mother fukker is 36 years old and has never ever fukkin tried chili!!!! Are you kidding me???

One of my co-workers gave me some Salmon to take home. She says, "You and your roommate can cook it up." I'm thinking that's a good idea.

I come home. Instead of offering it to him, I decided to ask if he even likes it.

"Hey, do you like Salmon?"
"I don't know. I've never really tried it."



As it turns out, he wont eat vegetables either. Has not had greens in years. Here is what he eats.

Beef (Steak, hamburger, ribs, etc)
Pork (Ribs, chops, etc...)
Chicken
Crab
Lobster
Cereal
Ice cream
Potato chips and various snacks

He has been my roommate for nearly 4 years and I have never seen him eat anything else.

[TheRifleman]

he'll die soon..don't worry

[SteveRyan]

LOL

I'm thinking he was a hound dog in a previous life and is cursed with highly sensitive scent and taste.

[goduke]

absolutely fukking hilarious

[McCarthyFam]

Time for a new roommate lol

[yisman]

He hates condiments. Ketchup, mayo, mustard, ranch, blue cheese or anything similar. Wont touch any of it. So now, this eliminates a whole spectrum of food. He likes BBQ and Teriyaki however.

This guy is awesome. On point.

[SteveRyan]

Oh, I forgot to mention that he does eat french fries. So this probably opens the door for the baked potato, but keep in mind, this excludes sour cream, chives and butter. Bacon bits are probably okay too.

This one time we went to a sushi bar. He scoured the menu for a long time and then finally found his meal.

Chicken skewers.

I think he recently discovered rice because I saw him eating a teriyaki chicken bowl a couple weeks ago.

[pulledclear]

Dead As A Hammer.

[5mike5]

People think I'm wierd cause I don't like 1 raw veg. Some cooked though. Not 1 thing in any salad

[tb1984]

[greenhippo]

I'm not as picky but I won't eat a single condiment besides hot sauce and ranch. No vegetables besides raw carrots and buttered corn. Absolutely no seafood except the fried fish at Lubys. No beans and no nuts. I hate bacon.

[Optional]

I'll eat anything.

And lots of it.

[chopperocker]

you should spend more time with the female co-worker that gave you the salmon, forget about the 4 year roommate.

[Russian Rocket]

you should spend more time with the female co-worker that gave you the salmon, forget about the 4 year roommate.

this guy is right on point here

[darrell74]

it's not a big deal about what he eats
it is lame that he was irritated with you cooking spaghetti

as long as he pays rent and doesn't break any boundaries, he's a good roommate
don't phuck it up.

I've lived w/ plenty of assholes that make him look like a saint.
In fact, next month I'm moving in with someone who's a complete asshole.

[chilidog]

Guy must've grown up on a different side of the tracks than I did. Cheap staples like mac n cheese, spaghetti, rice/beans, soups, stews and casseroles was pretty much my diet. I never had the premium ground beef until college, seemed like there was more melted fat in the skillet than there was beef, and I didn't have my first steak, shrimp, or real fish (fish sticks only!) until college as well. Fruit was rare in the house (the occasional summertime watermelon was a special treat), and having any kind of sugary snacks in the house just didn't happen. Halloween and Easter definitely meant something to us kids.

The way I eat now is a fry cry from how I was raised. Come to think of it, I was skinny as could be back then, and didn't start gaining weight until college when I suddenly had all this good food to eat.

[darrell74]

^
I identify with that

[bradthebloke]

tell em to eat shit

[PhillyFlyers]

Okay, well that's not entirely true. Of course he eats food. What's driving me nuts is what he wont eat, or more specifically what he has never even tried.

Case in point - A couple years ago we move into an apartment. Not long after that I am cooking some spaghetti. The spaghetti is boiling and I got some Ragu in a pan staying warm. My roommate comes out of his room:

"What are you cooking; it smells fukkin awful." (Boston accent).
I reply, "It's spaghetti."
"It's fukking nasty; smells awful."
"You dont like spaghetti??"
"No, I can't stand Italian food. It just smells so fukking gross."
"You don't like any Italian food?"

Then we get into thid conversation about all the Italian food he can't stand, which by the way basically includes everything except pizza and he only eats cheese pizza. As it turns out, he has never even tried spaghetti. Spaghetti!!! Never even tried it. Lasagna...NOPE! Never tried that either. Shells....nope! Manicotti...nope! Alfredo....nope!

My mind is blown. To me, the house smells awesome: like little Italy. To him is smells like death.

Several days later, I decided to whip up a batch of chicken salad. It's basically chicken, onion, hard boiled egg, celery, cranberries and mayo. Not a big deal.

He comes home. "What the fukk were you cooking? It's fukkin nasty."
"It's chicken salad."
"Fukkin nasty."
"You ever tried chicken salad?"
"Nope."

The guy is 36 years old. Never tried pasta or chicken salad. Never tried egg salad either.

So then I start grilling him on basic types of food to see if he has ever tried them. Deviled eggs...1 time. Potato salad....maybe 1 time. Then I get to the bottom of it.

He hates condiments. Ketchup, mayo, mustard, ranch, blue cheese or anything similar. Wont touch any of it. So now, this eliminates a whole spectrum of food. He likes BBQ and Teriyaki however.

Not long ago, we head over to Steak N Shake to get a burger and fries. On the way there, I tell him that the best way to get the fries is with the chili and cheese.

"I've never tried it."
"But you've had chili fries before right?"
"Nope. Never tried it."

So I did a little deeper....

"Have you ever tried chili?"
"Nope."

Mother fukker is 36 years old and has never ever fukkin tried chili!!!! Are you kidding me???

One of my co-workers gave me some Salmon to take home. She says, "You and your roommate can cook it up." I'm thinking that's a good idea.

I come home. Instead of offering it to him, I decided to ask if he even likes it.

"Hey, do you like Salmon?"
"I don't know. I've never really tried it."



As it turns out, he wont eat vegetables either. Has not had greens in years. Here is what he eats.

Beef (Steak, hamburger, ribs, etc)
Pork (Ribs, chops, etc...)
Chicken
Crab
Lobster
Cereal
Ice cream
Potato chips and various snacks

He has been my roommate for nearly 4 years and I have never seen him eat anything else.

He eats Ice Cream. That's one Italian food item he likes.

[chilidog]

He eats Ice Cream. That's one Italian food item he likes.

http://www.almanac.com/content/histo...ho-invented-it

That's pretty cool, I never knew the origin of ice cream. I never would've guessed it was Chinese!

[PhillyFlyers]

http://www.almanac.com/content/histo...ho-invented-it

That's pretty cool, I never knew the origin of ice cream. I never would've guessed it was Chinese!

This is bullshit.

The world's first ice cream is gelato invented in Italy.

[Dutch]

Your roommate sounds like an annoying 11 yr old girl.

I hate women who are picky eaters, it's unforgivable in men. Eat whats on your plate..homo.

[SteveRyan]

Your roommate sounds like an annoying 11 yr old girl.

I hate women who are picky eaters, it's unforgivable in men. Eat whats on your plate..homo.

His taste buds and sense of smell are hyper sensitive. He's afraid to try new foods because if he's at a restaurant and he orders something he doesnt like he still has to pay for it even though he took only 1 bite.

It doesn't matter where we eat; the story is always the same.

Cheeseburger - "Ill have the fries"
Chicken sandwich - "Ill have the fries"
Ribs - "Can I get fries with that?"
Steak - "Does that come with fries?"
Lobster - "Ill have a side of fries please."

"Do you want a side salad with that sir?"
"No thanks. Can I get fries?"

The guy is from Boston. The 1st time we went out to get all you can eat crab here is what happens.

"Sir, you have your choice of salad, Boston or Manhattan clam chowder."
"No thanks, I don't want either."
I said, "Don't you want the clam chowder?"
"I've never tried clam chowder."
"Wait....you're from BOSTON and you've never tried clam chowder??"
"Nope."
"Dude....order the fukkin clam chowder and take a bit. If you don't like it, give it back."
"Okay fine."

"Excuse me maam, whats the difference between Boston and Manhattan clam chowder?"

LOL

[bradthebloke]

whens the last time he got laid?

[chilidog]

This is bullshit.

The world's first ice cream is gelato invented in Italy.

*shrug* wikipedia has a pretty long entry on the history of ice cream as well

[PAULYPOKER]

Can not be healthy with a diet like that......


If he does not have health problems already,he will definitely have boat loads of em by the time he is 40.......


He needs a shrink most definitely....


There are some serious issues in his closet......

[ParlayininHTown]

whens the last time he got laid?

What would that have to do with his appetite/taste in food?

Seriously, I'm intrigued to hear your angle on this.

I'm a picky eater, and I haven't gotten laid in quite some time.

[flocko76]

at least you don't have to worry about him eating your food.

[onemoregoal]

I hate people like that, I suggest you find a new friend - this wont work out.
An ex girlfriend used to only eat bread, fries, crisps...
Shes now eating bread, fries, crisps - alone.

[bradthebloke]

What would that have to do with his appetite/taste in food?

Seriously, I'm intrigued to hear your angle on this.

I'm a picky eater, and I haven't gotten laid in quite some time.

girls tend to not care for finnicky eaters. Find them more feminine. plus, maybe they figure theres a good chance he doesnt eat pussy.

[gummo]

Chicken salad, egg salad, deviled eggs, potato salad anything with mayonnaise in it are all in fact nasty. I pretty much hate all those condiments you listed too. I do like vegetables though.

[ParlayininHTown]

girls tend to not care for finnicky eaters. Find them more feminine. plus, maybe they figure theres a good chance he doesnt eat pussy.

I can understand that. I don't mind eating pussy, though.

I imagine this guy's roommate never dates.

Thank you for your prompt reply.

[Coachep]

LOL, If he's 36 and your roomate than you must be close to that age. If I was 30 years old and still had a roommate I would fukkin kill myself. Become a man, live on your own. Then you won[t have to worry and lose so much sleep about what some dude will or won't eat.

[Dutch]

My gf's 40 yr old fagggy brother won't eat chicken on the bone like a fuking 5 yr old, but loves boneless chicken. Fuker pouted like a bitch one night when all there was to eat was chicken wings.

Whenever I know he's gonna be at our house, I stop and buy a bucket of fried chicken and then stare him down when I walk in the door. Fuk him...homo.

[SteveRyan]

Oddly enough, my roommate does have a girlfriend.

Actually, he has been through 3 gf's since he became my roommate.

The 1st girl was a horrible alcoholic. Total closet alcoholic. You would never guess by looking at her because she was a sexy little freak with a rockin body. She drank Jack Daniels for breakfast religiously and was hospitalized because of it. Not sure if she is even still alive.

His next gf was someone that he dated in high school. A little chubby and not much of a looker. She scrounged him up on Facebook when she was separating from her husband. She lives in Mass and he lives here in Vegas. They dated for a long time even though she was still married, but ultimately the relationship didn't work out because he is too needy and she just couldn't give him all that he required in order to feel good.

He current girlfriend he met on an airplane while flying into Boston. Shes not the greatest lookin broad either (As he has openly admitted to me more than one time) but she is definitely a good catch.

It's hilarious the way he talks to her over the phone in his Boston accent. I can hear him down the hall....

"Yes gorgeous (Boston accent on the gorgeous), yes baby, I'll do that for you. Do you wanna see me tonight baby? You know I wanna see you gorgeous. Alright baby...I'll stop at the store and get that for ya beautiful."

All in all, my roomie is a great guy. Tends to be a bit negative (Actually negative alot), but he has my back and I can always rely on him. One night I was stranded on the strip at 4 in the morning. He left his girl to come get me.