(I know Oregon started this mess of having 20 different uniforms. I also know Maryland took it to another level yesterday. Here are 10 excuses the uniform designers have been leaking out to the critics.)

10. If the quarterback started dressing like a chess piece, he may incorporate another move besides the two step drop in his repertoire.

9. Under Armor offered us better looking hookers and drugs for the uniform switch.

8. If the uniforms disgust you, that may deflect the attention on how much their play will.

7. The RB had a pair of white,red,black,yellow sneakers in his closet for years and nothing to match it with.

6. The uniforms make their junk look HUGE!

5. After a game, they can go to a frat party and not worry if someone pukes on them.

4. Leopard print with pink ribbons was already taken by the San Francisco AFL team.

3. The replica jerseys will be huge money makers during Mardi Gras

2. Something needed to be made to be given away at the 2012 SBR bash.

1. Hey, at least the helmet isn't as loud as JJ Gold's toupee.