[Deuce]

I'll start...


1. I went to LV for the Adult entertainment expo held every year in Jan. Well at this event it is what you would expect, tons of smoking hot porn chics signing pictures and taking pics with loser fans. the top stars are usually there (exclude jenna etc) but you get the drift, it wasnt any busch league shit. The men was the best part, you would have thought it was a dungeons and dragons convention. At the event there are several tables set up selling everything from penis pills to dolls to swinger vacation packages.

This one table had a "win a free escort contest" I go over there and flirt with the girl who is signing people up, they asked for name/hotel room. She said "wow you should be in porn you are hot. I will make sure your name is one of the lucky ones to get picked." I was thinking who knows what will happen. Later that day I return to my hotel and get a phone call, "is this Deuce" ugh. "yes" -- operator on the "congrats you won a free hooker! What type of girl do you like?" me-"send me over a blonde with huge "

she confirmed the hotel/room etc

I get ready real quick (shower, babywipe my asshole, do some push ups, crest teeth strips) she comes over and the bitch was fat and ugly. She was maybe 19 yrs. total white trash girl who talked like a savage. she told me before we get dirty that is $200 an hour. "WTF" you are ugly, fat and plus I thought it was for free" she responds, free to get me over here and $200 for sexy time!

I was mad as hell, I told her to get ass out of my room, she told me she would get her ass kicked if she came back with no money. I could tell her ass would get beat if she came back with no money. I told her to Ill pay her to leave, I gave her $40 to leave. As soon as she left, I heard a knock on the door, I look out and see this huge tower of a dark man. At least 375lbs and tall. He banged on my door to pay me. I hid like a bitch looking through the peep hole. He continued to knock and said "ILL find yo ass tomorrow!"

I switched hotel room that night.


2. I was a strip club and with this fine half black mix. She was all over my musclejock bod. I did pay for her VIP and it was worth the $200.00 but she continued to hustle me for more money. I told her I know how the game works, If you want me after your done dancing and we can meet up. She was cool with that. I got her number and left the club.

As I was leaving the club, I was followed out by a bouncer. I walked fast as shit, unlocked my car and this big arab looking dude asked to see my phone. I said "Im in a hurry not now" He then put his hand on my door so I couldnt open my door and repeated give me the phone. I knew there were 2 other bouncers at the door so I didnt want to pull any chuck norris type shit. I gave him my phone. The man went out in the middle of the parking lot and slammed it down on the ground as hard as he could. then stepped on it. my phone was 1000 pieces. He told me to get lost. I wasnt going to fukk with bouncers. they are basically cowboys at strip clubs and play by their own rules

I left without a phone. fukk him

[obamaismyuncle]