Originally posted on 04/29/2013:

I've been doing this for nearly four years now. I wandered into sports gambling after being big on almost everything competitive my whole life, having played in high school and college. I had a ton of success in fantasy sports from the time I was a senior in high school up until a few years ago, when I basically left that world for this one (for a reason I still can't quite define).

I'm mostly writing this because I've been on a nice run lately. I've been doing well in baseball, and I've been able to make three decent payout requests in the past few months. I'm by no means a big-time gambler; I do this for fun, not to put food on the table. Disposable income gambler. Still, the money has come in handy recently.

How do I feel about it? I don't know. I think and hope I've "turned a corner," at least in how I'm capping games, but I still have very little control and can't seem to get the quantity over quality down pat. I honestly seem to have more energy and drive when I'm losing, if that makes any sense. Winning recently has kind of mellowed me out a little. Again, not sure why but hard to explain. I'm definitely not as "satisfied," or happy, as I thought I would be from being relatively successful.

I've also tried to grasp the "why" of betting on sports. It's not legal, and to be honest, not really +EV either for a guy like me with a family and other obligations. I know it doesn't really seem like it, but I do spend a lot of time away from this board doing other things. It's just that when I'm on a computer, really SBR is the only page I even visit anymore other than reading my e-mail.

There is a legitimate and fundamental reason successful cappers spend a ton of time researching the games they put money on. We're trying to predict the unpredictable; to find angles that most fans and even the athletes themselves maybe haven't even thought about or don't know about yet. We're attempting to say what will happen in a world of uncertainty. That isn't really rational if you think about it, and most ex-athletes would probably agree (unless you have some sort of "in" with a team or player beforehand).

Anyway, I know this is a long post that isn't necessarily saying anything or going anywhere. I don't really know how I feel about doing this into the future, or how long I will even continue. I don't have a local, and it seems like the off-shore industry is always on the verge of the apocalypse. Someday, I'll probably re-gain my sanity and return to fantasy sports to pass the time.

I love crunching numbers and looking at stats. Always have. Believe it or not, I rarely -- if ever -- watch games I bet on, or even many games in general. For some reason, this bug has bit me and I can't seem to shake it. I love the action and the instant results, win or lose (I would say gratification, yet that's only when we win). Yet there has to be a masochistic side to us that likes to lose and chase just a little, right?

Rant over.