Originally posted on 06/21/2012:

When you make stupid bets, you need to vanish.

When you need to vanish, you fake your own death.

When you fake your own death, you dye your eyebrows.

And when you dye your eyebrows, you attend your own funeral as a guy named Phil Shifley.

Don't attend your own funeral as a guy named Phil Shifley, JJ.