BOYS I HAVE TO TELL YOU I THINK AGE IS CATCHING UP WITH ME
ITS A SAD DAY BUT I NOTICE THINGS CHANGING IN MY LIFE AND I DONT LIKE IT.
TODAY I WENT TO THE CHINATOWN YMCA AND WORKED OUT I NOTICE I AM STRUGGLING TO LIFT THE WEIGHTS I USED TO TAKE FOR GRANTED.I DID THE NAUTILAUS TODAY AND I WAS DOING 7 PLATES ON THE BENCH PRESS THEN 5 MINUTES LATER A 70 YEAR OLD CHINESE WOMEN DID THE SAME MACHINE AND SHE HAD ON 5 PLATES.BOYS YOU DO THE MATH ME A HEALTHY 51 YEAR OLD IS JUST BARELY AS STRONG AS A 70 YEAR OLD CHINESE WOMEN
ON THE GOLF COURSE I USED TO DRIVE THE BALL 270 YARDS GUYS USED TO SAY TO ME MAN YOU HIT THE BALL LONG AND STRAIGHT NOW THE REGULAR GUYS I PLAY WITH SAY YOUR DRIVER MUST BE DEAD YOU HAVE LOST SOME DISTANCE
NOW I AM THINKING OF GOING TO A REGULAR SHAFT ON MY DRIVER INSTEAD OF A STIFF.I CAN STILL PLAY A PRETTY GOOD GAME OF GOLF BUT I AM HITTING LONGER CLUBS TO ALL THE HOLES
AND FOR SEX I WAS NEVER JOHN HOLMES BUT I USED TO ENJOY SEX NOW MY LOVELY WIFE HAS TO SEDUCE ME AND EVEN THEN I SAY LET ME WATCH THIS LAST PLAY.I HAVE NEVER TRIED VIAGRA BUT IT MIGHT BE TIME I JUST DONT WANT TO WALK AROUND TOWN WITH A BONAR FOR 6 HOURS I MIGHT END UP ON THE SEX OFFENDERS LIST.I HAVE NOTICED MY PENIS ISNT QUITE WHAT IT USED TO BE BOYS THE ONCE PROUD BEANTOWNJIM NOW DOESNT PULL IT OUT AS FREELY AS I USED TO.I WANTED TO GO GET A MASSAGE BUT I WAS AFFRAID I MIGHT NOT BE ABLE TO PERFORM IF THE MASSAGE LADY WANTS TO TAKE IT A STEP FURTHER.20 YEARS AGO I WOULD BE BANGING BROADS EVERY OTHER DAY I WAS YOUNG AND HAD MONEY
IN CLOSING BOYS AGE HAS ALSO AFFECTED MY GAMBLING THIS LAST YEAR I AM DOING SOME REALLY STUPID THINGS LIKE BETTING 1200 TO MAKE 800 DOLLARS WITH TIM WAKEFIELD I HATE THIS F-CKING GUY AND ESPECIALLY AT A BIG PRICE.BOYS SATURDAY NIGHT I WAS UP 1,680 DOLLARS AFTER YESTERDAY I KNOW OWE MY LOCAL GUY 1100 I BET TWO HUGE FAVORITES YESTERDAY AND BOTH FOR BIG MONEY.MY MIND IS ALSO GOING FELLAS
I DONT HAVE A GRIN
WHEN AGE SETS IN