Tell a joke, win some betpoints!

[JIBBBY]

Don't spend em all in one place boys

Bet points will be worth something one day just like FTX will. ..

[Bostongambler]

Jerry the Giraffe walks into the crowded saloon. Bellies up and says to the bartender, "highballs on me".

😂 😂 😂

[wquine]

Genie: I have the power to grant you 3 wishes but keep in mind, whatever you wish, your mother-in-law will receive two-fold…
Man: Ok. My first wish is for 1 billion dollars.
Genie: Your wish is granted, but keep in mind that your mother-in-law will receive 2 billion dollars.
Man: That’s fine. My second wish is for a 20,000sq ft mansion in the Hamptons.
Genie: Your wish is granted, but keep in mind that your mother-in-law will receive a 40,000sq ft mansion in the Hamptons.
Man: That’s fine.
Genie: Ok. What is your third wish?
Man: I want you to beat me half to death.

[dollarbill]

https://youtu.be/g-OF7KGyDis

Thank You...... return the gift with Saturday play UCLA/UK over. BOL

[jackpot269]

Thank you sir! Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!

[53 defense]

Two of Santa’s Elves are working in the toy shop..
one is tall and thin..
the other one short n fat..

thin one says to the chubby fella

ya know Moe, your gettin fatter n fatter

whats goin on ??

Fat one reply’s….

it’s your wife’s fault …. every time I go over to bang her, she makes me a sandwich the way out ……

[EddieMusher]

Folks, I'm so white during the riots I went out and bought a television.

[OldBill]

Man in bar tells bar keep i bet you $100 i can make your horse laugh then after that make him cry

ok he says put it up he lens over whispers in horses ear the horse starts braying laughing like crazy

then he takes horse into mens room horse comes out crying like a baby

ok Bar tender ask how did u do that? well 1st i whispered in his ear my dvick is bigger than yours yeah ok then what did you do in mens room

I showed him !

[pologq]

what is the song you listen to after having sex with a girl with a STD?

Tainted Love

[TiredPro]

What do John The Baptist and Winnie The Pooh have in common ??

Same middle name.

[MaltedHopsFrenzy]

Hey! Did you hear the one about the SBR poster who was going to post the greatest joke ever told, but then saw that the OP ran out of betpoints to hand out?

[JIBBBY]

Hey! Did you hear the one about the SBR poster who was going to post the greatest joke ever told, but then saw that the OP ran out of betpoints to hand out?

He must have gave out 15 or 20 thousand bet points in this thread.

A few years ago that would have been worth probably around $500 or more in the SBR store.


Here is another joke for the broke..

[cincinnatikid513]

johnnyvegas won a bet

[19th Hole]

[First day as a bartender]

Customer: I'll have a martini, dry

Me, staring at all the liquid ingredients: I don't know how to tell you this

[19th Hole]

An amnesiac walks into a bar.

He goes up to a beautiful blonde and says, “So, do I come here often?”

[Bostongambler]

Man in bar tells bar keep i bet you $100 i can make your horse laugh then after that make him cry

ok he says put it up he lens over whispers in horses ear the horse starts braying laughing like crazy

then he takes horse into mens room horse comes out crying like a baby

ok Bar tender ask how did u do that? well 1st i whispered in his ear my dvick is bigger than yours yeah ok then what did you do in mens room

I showed him !

Good one bill

[Jayvegas420]

my grade 5 sex Ed teacher walked into the classroom with a banana & said, "Today kids I'm going to teach you how to put a condom on."
He continued,"I brought in this banana because I can't get hard on an empty stomach."

[19th Hole]

A panda walks into a bar.
He gobbles some beer nuts, then pulls out a pistol, fires it in the air, and heads for the door.



“Hey!” shouts the bartender, but the panda yells back, “I’m a panda. Google me!”



Sure enough, panda:

“A tree-climbing mammal with distinct black-and-white coloring.
Eats shoots and leaves."

[miaplus3]

My girlfriend says she’s going to leave me because I have a gambling problem.
But I think she’s bluffing.

[Napishi Na]

Biggest joke today: The Tampa Bay Buccaneers

[miaplus3]

A father walks into the washroom only to find his son masturbating. " Son , Stop that or you'll go blind ". Dad , im over here

Every now & then I get belly laugh after reading a post, this was one of those times.

[Optional]

A panda walks into a bar.
He gobbles some beer nuts, then pulls out a pistol, fires it in the air, and heads for the door.



“Hey!” shouts the bartender, but the panda yells back, “I’m a panda. Google me!”



Sure enough, panda:

“A tree-climbing mammal with distinct black-and-white coloring.
Eats shoots and leaves."

There is an Aussie joke about a Wombat who just eats roots shoots and leaves. But no gun is involved.

[19th Hole]

There is an Aussie joke about a Wombat who just eats roots shoots and leaves. But no gun is involved.

----
Well the Panda was in a western saloon.

[kostasblues]

Genie: I have the power to grant you 3 wishes but keep in mind, whatever you wish, your mother-in-law will receive two-fold…
Man: Ok. My first wish is for 1 billion dollars.
Genie: Your wish is granted, but keep in mind that your mother-in-law will receive 2 billion dollars.
Man: That’s fine. My second wish is for a 20,000sq ft mansion in the Hamptons.
Genie: Your wish is granted, but keep in mind that your mother-in-law will receive a 40,000sq ft mansion in the Hamptons.
Man: That’s fine.
Genie: Ok. What is your third wish?
Man: I want you to beat me half to death.

this is a good one LOL

for the record, I love my mother in law !!!

[mcaulay777]

Mother Tomato was walking along with her three tomato kids the last one was lagging behind so mother tomato went back in line squashed her and said Ketchup!

[Foxx]

Mother Tomato was walking along with her three tomato kids the last one was lagging behind so mother tomato went back in line squashed her and said Ketchup!

[b1slickguy]

A panda walks into a bar.
He gobbles some beer nuts, then pulls out a pistol, fires it in the air, and heads for the door.



“Hey!” shouts the bartender, but the panda yells back, “I’m a panda. Google me!”



Sure enough, panda:

“A tree-climbing mammal with distinct black-and-white coloring.
Eats shoots and leaves."

Just read this and thought of this old, dry one:



What's the difference between beer nuts and deer nuts?

Beer nuts are $1.99 and deer nuts are under a buck.

[cincinnatikid513]

im at the asian massage with this smoking hot korean yada yada yada johnny vegas won another bet

[kingdom]

What do you do when a professional gambler shows up on your doorstep?

Pay him for the pizza.

one of the best and most fitting.

[kostasblues]

Merry Christmas!

[Ian]

What do you do when a professional gambler shows up on your doorstep?

Pay him for the pizza.

Thanks for the points, guys. Merry Christmas!

[MalikHusam]

What is Santa's native language?
North Polish

[MalikHusam]

Why did Santa get a parking ticket on Christmas Eve?

He left his sleigh in a snow parking zone.

[EmpireMaker]

Thanks Kostasblues !!!
Merry Christmas !!!

[mr. leisure]

Merry Christmas, Kosta ! 🎄🎁