LETTERMAN's top ten reasons there are no BLACK NASCAR drivers

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  • Fishhead
    SBR Aristocracy
    • 08-11-05
    • 40179

    #1
    LETTERMAN's top ten reasons there are no BLACK NASCAR drivers
    # 10 - Have to sit upright while driving.

    # 9 - Pistol won't stay under front seat.

    # 8 - Engine noise drowns out the rap music.

    # 7 - Pit crew can't work on car while holding up pants at the same time.

    # 6 - They keep trying to carjack Dale Earnhardt Jr.

    # 5 - Police cars on track interfere with race.

    # 4 - No passenger seat for the Ho.

    # 3 - No Cadillacs approved for competition.

    # 2 - When they crash their cars, they bail out & run.


    AND THE NUMBER ONE REASON WHY BLACKS CAN'T BE IN NASCAR...




    # 1 - They Can't wear their helmets sideways.
  • hhsilver
    SBR Hall of Famer
    • 06-07-07
    • 7375

    #2
    From Snopes . com (unban Legends site)

    Claim: David Letterman offered a "Top Ten" list about why there are no black NASCAR drivers.

    Status: False.

    Origins: Jokes are often used to pass along negative stereotypes about members of other groups because the veil of humor is seen to bestow a form of plausible deniability about the nature of the messages being imparted. (When called upon about offensive statements contained therein, the joke's teller believes he has the safe retreat of "But I was just telling you this funny story I heard; it's not like I think that
    way" or "Don't shoot me if you find this racist; it's David's list, not mine.")

    The catalog of behaviors quoted above is an example of racism dressed up to look like a humor offering. Couched in the form of a David Letterman "Top Ten" list, it expounds upon any number of denigrating clichés presenting blacks as car-stealing, gun-toting criminals who dress in saggy gansta-style pants, wear their caps sideways, and drive about in flashy cars blaring loud rap music with their "hos" by their sides.

    This list has been circulating on the Internet since at least early 2005 (sometimes under the alternate titles of "The Top 10 reasons why there are no ****** NASCAR drivers" and "Top Ten Reasons Why There Are No Rap Stars in NASCAR"), and although we don't know the identity of its creator, it isn't something that originated on the Late Show with David Letterman (as a search of that show's Top 10 archive will confirm). The compilation started out as an uncredited "Top 10 Reasons" list, but as it made the rounds of the Internet, someone inevitably tacked David Letterman's name onto it.

    ..................

    I'm sure no one here would believe this garbage came from Letterman, but I thought I'd quote the above anyway,
    Comment
    • C-Gold
      SBR Hall of Famer
      • 09-04-10
      • 6808

      #3
      hhsilver there are jokes about everybody grow a sense of humor why don't you. That list was hilarious.
      Comment
      • ttrace35
        SBR Posting Legend
        • 09-30-10
        • 10828

        #4
        I even admit. Was funny.
        Comment
        • opie1988
          SBR Posting Legend
          • 09-12-10
          • 23429

          #5
          Originally posted by ttrace35
          I even admit. Was funny.
          Trace-

          Are you an african/american?

          I dig you regardless, brother. Just curious.
          Comment
          • Dank_Fire
            SBR MVP
            • 05-13-09
            • 2269

            #6
            Good Stuff
            Comment
            • C-Gold
              SBR Hall of Famer
              • 09-04-10
              • 6808

              #7
              Originally posted by ttrace35
              I even admit. Was funny.
              You're racist. You're racist, You're racist you're racist you're ra ra ra ra ra ra racist.

              You're damn right it was funny. Shoulda had a reference for no Hi-C cup holder in Nascars, no storage space for watermelons and Nascars too big to fit through the KFC drive through window.
              Comment
              • C-Gold
                SBR Hall of Famer
                • 09-04-10
                • 6808

                #8
                Originally posted by opie1988
                Trace-

                Are you an african/american?

                I dig you regardless, brother. Just curious.
                Tracy is my bi-atch. I smack that ho around the SBR forumns all day long.
                Comment
                • pavyracer
                  SBR Aristocracy
                  • 04-12-07
                  • 82781

                  #9
                  This post is very racist. There is no room for making fun of other races in sport forums.
                  Comment
                  • jgray
                    SBR MVP
                    • 09-06-09
                    • 3599

                    #10
                    I didn't need Snopes to know that wasn't a real Dave list. My first clue was that the list was funny...
                    Comment
                    • C-Gold
                      SBR Hall of Famer
                      • 09-04-10
                      • 6808

                      #11
                      Originally posted by pavyracer
                      This post is very racist. There is no room for making fun of other races in sport forums.

                      You never said that when people here made fun of asians, whites, hispanics, or arabs. Happens pretty daily around here.
                      Comment
                      • ttrace35
                        SBR Posting Legend
                        • 09-30-10
                        • 10828

                        #12
                        Originally posted by opie1988
                        Trace-

                        Are you an african/american?

                        I dig you regardless, brother. Just curious.
                        I'm black. But the shit was funny. My people do a lot of shit to deserve this kind of treatment. How can I get mad?
                        Comment
                        • ttrace35
                          SBR Posting Legend
                          • 09-30-10
                          • 10828

                          #13
                          Originally posted by C-Gold
                          Tracy is my bi-atch. I smack that ho around the SBR forumns all day long.
                          You can smack me around forums all you want pal. In real life I would eat your food kid. Why not make another thread about how you love jersey shore? Or another thread about cokks?
                          Comment
                          • opie1988
                            SBR Posting Legend
                            • 09-12-10
                            • 23429

                            #14
                            Originally posted by ttrace35

                            I'm black. But the shit was funny. My people do a lot of shit to deserve this kind of treatment. How can I get mad?


                            I appreciate your sense of humor, brother.

                            I find white trash jokes plenty funny as well. If its funny.....its funny. Who cares what race you are??
                            Comment
                            • ttrace35
                              SBR Posting Legend
                              • 09-30-10
                              • 10828

                              #15
                              Originally posted by opie1988


                              I appreciate your sense of humor, brother.

                              I find white trash jokes plenty funny as well. If its funny.....its funny. Who cares what race you are??
                              Comment
                              • C-Gold
                                SBR Hall of Famer
                                • 09-04-10
                                • 6808

                                #16
                                Can't have an expired drivers liscense
                                Can't play basketball and drive a car at the same time
                                40 oz won't fit in the cup holder
                                when they park the car in the hood it's always on blocks the next morning
                                windows too tinted to see through
                                Popeyes ran out of sponsorship money

                                hehe
                                Comment
                                • jonmic
                                  SBR Wise Guy
                                  • 09-25-06
                                  • 685

                                  #17
                                  That was hilarious...very true
                                  Comment
                                  • Fishhead
                                    SBR Aristocracy
                                    • 08-11-05
                                    • 40179

                                    #18
                                    Originally posted by C-Gold
                                    Popeyes ran out of sponsorship money

                                    hehe
                                    Comment
                                    • C-Gold
                                      SBR Hall of Famer
                                      • 09-04-10
                                      • 6808

                                      #19
                                      Originally posted by ttrace35
                                      You can smack me around forums all you want pal. In real life I would eat your food kid. Why not make another thread about how you love jersey shore? Or another thread about cokks?

                                      Blah blah blah so says Mr. Internet tough guy.

                                      You're only a flight away Tracy (transvestite name). DON'T give me a reason to jump on that plane and smack your transgender ass around.
                                      Comment
                                      • stealthyburrito
                                        SBR Posting Legend
                                        • 05-12-09
                                        • 21562

                                        #20
                                        sure letterman would've been in hot water with this in this pc world if it were real.

                                        but hilarious nonetheless
                                        Comment
                                        • C-Gold
                                          SBR Hall of Famer
                                          • 09-04-10
                                          • 6808

                                          #21
                                          How come there are no Asian Nascar drivers?
                                          Comment
                                          • ttrace35
                                            SBR Posting Legend
                                            • 09-30-10
                                            • 10828

                                            #22
                                            Originally posted by C-Gold
                                            Blah blah blah so says Mr. Internet tough guy.

                                            You're only a flight away Tracy (transvestite name). DON'T give me a reason to jump on that plane and smack your transgender ass around.
                                            Ok pal. I'm a gangster for real. And I have a ten foot long rap sheet to prove it. But. Ok.
                                            Comment
                                            • Nicky Santoro
                                              SBR Posting Legend
                                              • 04-08-08
                                              • 16103

                                              #23
                                              i knew this wasn't letterman. this is not him. i was just about to say how this is possible to allow this on tv. if this were real, letterman would be threatened by all blacks and have the black community protest. Al Sharpton and Jesse Jackson would have him fired. i thought it was real until someone said it was fake. i had a feeling. no way they would allow this type of humor on tv, especailly in today's society.. but it was a great list.. i wonder who really wrote this list.
                                              Comment
                                              • C-Gold
                                                SBR Hall of Famer
                                                • 09-04-10
                                                • 6808

                                                #24
                                                Originally posted by ttrace35
                                                Ok pal. I'm a gangster for real. And I have a ten foot long rap sheet to prove it. But. Ok.
                                                Stealing hubcaps doesn't make you a gangster. You'd be even more gangster if you'd never get caught. You'd get wrecked son. Learn when the odds are not in your favor and don't play.
                                                Comment
                                                • ttrace35
                                                  SBR Posting Legend
                                                  • 09-30-10
                                                  • 10828

                                                  #25
                                                  Originally posted by C-Gold
                                                  Stealing hubcaps doesn't make you a gangster. You'd be even more gangster if you'd never get caught. You'd get wrecked son. Learn when the odds are not in your favor and don't play.
                                                  Shut the fukk up with this bullshit. Neither one of us are flying to meet anybody. We will never see each other. Your just a clown. Nobody even pays you any mind. You made a basketball thread, went like 10 and 0. And still nobody gives a shit. You were just talking to yourself in your own thread(don't make me pull it up). Its because your a circus clown. You think people like your watermelon and chicken jokes. You just make yourself look stupid and more stupid with each passing day.
                                                  Comment
                                                  • C-Gold
                                                    SBR Hall of Famer
                                                    • 09-04-10
                                                    • 6808

                                                    #26
                                                    Originally posted by ttrace35
                                                    Shut the fukk up with this bullshit. Neither one of us are flying to meet anybody. We will never see each other. Your just a clown. Nobody even pays you any mind. You made a basketball thread, went like 10 and 0. And still nobody gives a shit. You were just talking to yourself in your own thread(don't make me pull it up). Its because your a circus clown. You think people like your watermelon and chicken jokes. You just make yourself look stupid and more stupid with each passing day.
                                                    Yet you and your lover King Mayan still stalk me around.
                                                    Comment
                                                    • ttrace35
                                                      SBR Posting Legend
                                                      • 09-30-10
                                                      • 10828

                                                      #27
                                                      Ok bud.
                                                      Comment
                                                      • ttrace35
                                                        SBR Posting Legend
                                                        • 09-30-10
                                                        • 10828

                                                        #28
                                                        Originally posted by C-Gold
                                                        Yet you and your lover King Mayan still stalk me around.
                                                        I see you started a new basketball thread. 19 out of 21, and still nobody cares. Your known as a clown around here. How you can't see that, I don't know. Anyway. I'm done. The only attention you get is from me and Mayan. Now just him.
                                                        Comment
                                                        • LordVodka
                                                          SBR Hall of Famer
                                                          • 08-17-09
                                                          • 5206

                                                          #29
                                                          I was about to say how the hell did he get away with that cause you know with today's politically correct bullshit they would fire him if he put that list out.
                                                          Comment
                                                          • King Mayan
                                                            SBR Posting Legend
                                                            • 09-22-10
                                                            • 21326

                                                            #30
                                                            TTrace, be careful with the snitches.....
                                                            Comment
                                                            • King Mayan
                                                              SBR Posting Legend
                                                              • 09-22-10
                                                              • 21326

                                                              #31
                                                              Originally posted by ttrace35
                                                              I see you started a new basketball thread. 19 out of 21, and still nobody cares. Your known as a clown around here. How you can't see that, I don't know. Anyway. I'm done. The only attention you get is from me and Mayan. Now just him.
                                                              I can't even talk crap to him no more, runs fast to the mods...... I have to stop worrying about fat trolls...
                                                              Comment
                                                              • Boscoe
                                                                SBR MVP
                                                                • 02-08-10
                                                                • 2811

                                                                #32
                                                                I can't imagine what moron would actually believe that was a letterman list.
                                                                Comment
                                                                • pittmatt80
                                                                  SBR Sharp
                                                                  • 01-30-10
                                                                  • 358

                                                                  #33
                                                                  I'm sorry but that was hilarious get a sense of humor to those of you who didn't like it.
                                                                  Comment
                                                                  • meader99
                                                                    SBR MVP
                                                                    • 10-30-10
                                                                    • 4223

                                                                    #34
                                                                    I seem to remember Carrot Top doing this at one of his stand ups.
                                                                    Comment
                                                                    • stevenash
                                                                      Moderator
                                                                      • 01-17-11
                                                                      • 65507

                                                                      #35
                                                                      Lettterman is a freaking genius.
                                                                      Comment
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