How do you act on a Job Interview?

[C-Gold]

Freaking hate it.

Balancing act between being humble and self promoting yourself.
Formal dress but not blowing them out of the water
Talking in business language but trying to act like you have a personality too
Telling them the same shat everybody else does, I'm a hard worker, a go getter blah blah blah

Here's the thing, I'm interviewing with this short, fat, geeky, white guy with glasses. I couldn't possibly have anything in common with this guy. I'm the opposite of him and I'm trying to tell him that I'm a nerd at heart blah blah blah.

The big question for me. Why do you want to work here? Ummmmm because you guys will pay me more money but you can't say that. I don't know what the real reason is. You can't say because it will be great experience so then I can get more money for my NEXT job. Don't these hamburgers know that money talks and the world revolves around money? Do you think I want to be doing work and would rather be doing work than enjoying the day gambling or something? Oh I just looooove working, I love spreadsheets and answering to bosses and corporate policies. Pay me mofo.

So what's your guy's angle? How do you deal with these hamburgers?

[xkgb]

THATS HOW I ACT

[SportsMushroom]

lie through your teeth mofo, tell them what they wanna hear

[Grits n' Gravy]

I interview a lot of people and I think the traditional interview questions are idiotic. Why do you want to work here? Tell me about a time you had a difficult situation and how you handled it? I'm going to get the same b.s. answers. When someone tells me they are a hard worker, I follow up with "give me 3 examples." That always creates an akward pause and foolish answer. We laugh and I move on to tell them everyone says they are a hard worker. What you told me was you do what you are paid to do. I know what kind of person I'm looking for to take on a specific job so I ask questions that throw people for a loop and make them have to think on their feet.

It is a tough market and I know most people are either looking for any job they can get or are coming to me for a better paying job or higher position.

[Grits n' Gravy]

lie through your teeth mofo, tell them what they wanna hear

That will work sometimes, but if you don't live up to it they usually can you during the 1st 90 days.

[OTL]

lie through your teeth mofo, tell them what they wanna hear

This If you tell them the truth you won't ever get a job, doesn't matter who you are. Nobody wants to hear the truth, so don't even try to be honest!

[Deuce]

Cool as a fukkin cucumber.

[Grits n' Gravy]

C-Gold, the most recent person I hired to be the vp of slots had zero slot department experience. He was head of Asian marketing for Caesars. I liked his leadership skills and he was honest in the fact that he had spent the past 3 months learning slots from the bottom up and since he would be one of my direct reports and I've run a slot department in the past, he would like to have an hour a day with me to discuss ideas and strategies for his staff and stay out of the technical director's way until he felt he earned his trust and respect. So far he has been a hit. His managers and floorpeople have never been happier.

[talnted]

cant stand job interviews. Im in the midst of them at the moment.

best way to prepare is to know the company. other than that just wing it with confidence.

[sickler]

Calm, composed, eager but not too eager. Too eager and you'll be offered less pay. They'll figure you're desperate.

[venice2222]

I'm usually drunk or stoned.

[C-Gold]

I interview a lot of people and I think the traditional interview questions are idiotic. Why do you want to work here? Tell me about a time you had a difficult situation and how you handled it? I'm going to get the same b.s. answers. When someone tells me they are a hard worker, I follow up with "give me 3 examples." That always creates an akward pause and foolish answer. We laugh and I move on to tell them everyone says they are a hard worker. What you told me was you do what you are paid to do. I know what kind of person I'm looking for to take on a specific job so I ask questions that throw people for a loop and make them have to think on their feet.

It is a tough market and I know most people are either looking for any job they can get or are coming to me for a better paying job or higher position.

Tell me why you want to work here
Are you a hard worker: I'm a hard worker
What are your weaknesses... really?

I like that you come back with " give me 3 examples"

But what's the problem with looking for a better paying job or higher position? What if working for you isn't my passion in life or my true calling, but I can work for you for a few years, make better money, and make you some money? I'm certainly an above average person, I feel like I can pick up any job (unless it's rocket science), I pride myself on doing a good job, I get along well with other people, most people like me, so what's the problem?

I'll tell you my peeve. It's having some BIMBO in HR read me questions off of a list and then record the answers into a word file. I'd much rather have a street smart guy who knows just what he's looking for and looking to sift through the bullshit ask me " give me 3 examples" instead of some boob look at my resume and ask me what my weaknesses are.

I want to be humble but I want to let them know that I'm a well above average person.
I want to let them know I really am a hard worker/willing to stay after 5PM to get the job done etc.
I'm creative and have good ideas for improvement
I'm positive/friendly/people generally like me as I'm not weird or always complaining like some people

I just don't know the right attitude to have and how to act. I'm a mercenary that wants more money. I don't want to work for free but I'll do a good job.

[onetrickpony]

i walk in with a colt 45, with the fresh scent of a recently smoke blunt, hit on the dudes wife if there is a pic and i start grilling the guy like does his daughter wear thongs or granny panties, thats my style dont expect most of u to pull that off.

[Robber]

start by jerking off and ask interviewer if this is something he/she enjoys

[Grits n' Gravy]

Tell me why you want to work here
Are you a hard worker: I'm a hard worker
What are your weaknesses... really?

I like that you come back with " give me 3 examples"

But what's the problem with looking for a better paying job or higher position? What if working for you isn't my passion in life or my true calling, but I can work for you for a few years, make better money, and make you some money? I'm certainly an above average person, I feel like I can pick up any job (unless it's rocket science), I pride myself on doing a good job, I get along well with other people, most people like me, so what's the problem?

I'll tell you my peeve. It's having some BIMBO in HR read me questions off of a list and then record the answers into a word file. I'd much rather have a street smart guy who knows just what he's looking for and looking to sift through the bullshit ask me " give me 3 examples" instead of some boob look at my resume and ask me what my weaknesses are.

I want to be humble but I want to let them know that I'm a well above average person.
I want to let them know I really am a hard worker/willing to stay after 5PM to get the job done etc.
I'm creative and have good ideas for improvement
I'm positive/friendly/people generally like me as I'm not weird or always complaining like some people

I just don't know the right attitude to have and how to act. I'm a mercenary that wants more money. I don't want to work for free but I'll do a good job.

Saying you are looking for better money and room to grow is always okay to me in an interview. I always encourage my people to seek better opportunities, even if it is outside the company. Completely agree that the H.R. screeners are a waste of time and money. Have yet to find a candidate worth hiring that they have sent to me. I usually identify people within the company I want or people from the outside and bring them in for an interview. If it goes well, I call H.R, and tell them to expect an application from person x and to fast track it to my office as I plan on making them an offer.

The weakness question is stupid. When I was asked that at an interview, I said I tend to speak too freely. They asked me to expand on the answer and I replied something to the effect that they were all fuckking idiots. I actually got the job. lol

Worst interview question I've ever been asked: "If you were a car, what kind of car would you be?" I walked out.

Feel free to pm me if you need any tips and good luck.

[JimmysEgo]

Apparently i'm too serious when i'm on a job interview. When i got hired where i'm at now, they told me that i'm nothing like how i was during the interview. They thought i might not fit in because i was so serious, but i'm really the complete opposite.

[Capybara]

Freaking hate it.

Balancing act between being humble and self promoting yourself.
Formal dress but not blowing them out of the water
Talking in business language but trying to act like you have a personality too
Telling them the same shat everybody else does, I'm a hard worker, a go getter blah blah blah

Here's the thing, I'm interviewing with this short, fat, geeky, white guy with glasses. I couldn't possibly have anything in common with this guy. I'm the opposite of him and I'm trying to tell him that I'm a nerd at heart blah blah blah.

The big question for me. Why do you want to work here? Ummmmm because you guys will pay me more money but you can't say that. I don't know what the real reason is. You can't say because it will be great experience so then I can get more money for my NEXT job. Don't these hamburgers know that money talks and the world revolves around money? Do you think I want to be doing work and would rather be doing work than enjoying the day gambling or something? Oh I just looooove working, I love spreadsheets and answering to bosses and corporate policies. Pay me mofo.

So what's your guy's angle? How do you deal with these hamburgers?

C-Gold, I am SOOOO with you, brother!! The hypocrisy of it all drives me batty! Like everyone in the world doesn't KNOW that you're in there because you need to get PAID! Like everyone in the world doesn't know that 99% of people get little or no actual satisfaction out of their jobs, they just have to earn a paycheck to live their friggin' LIVES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

But you have to play the game like some kind of robot. I hate it!!!

Anyway, you covered everything. You need to be confident but not cocky or arrogant, pleasant but not TOO much personality so they think you're a clown or something, positive, professional, and you have to answer all the baloney questions with the pure baloney answers they're looking for. It's the worst. Me personally, I'm the irreverent, witty, warm, friendly type -- totally doesn't play at interviews.

[C-Gold]

Apparently i'm too serious when i'm on a job interview. When i got hired where i'm at now, they told me that i'm nothing like how i was during the interview. They thought i might not fit in because i was so serious, but i'm really the complete opposite.

I feel ya. I'm a drinking, gambling, woman chasing handicapper. I'm smarter than the average bear and I'm popular but you can't like that in an interview, you have to act BOOOORING/good worker bee blah blah blah.

Another tip of advice. When you start a job don't walk in there like you own the place. Be more quite, timid, humble, keep to yourself. See who the players in your office are. Who has power, who'se a rat, who talks behind everybodies back, who'se phony.

LAY LOW a few months. Don't hit on any of the women, don't drink wildly if you go to happy hour. Be respectful and stick to yourself.

[C-Gold]

C-Gold, I am SOOOO with you, brother!! The hypocrisy of it all drives me batty! Like everyone in the world doesn't KNOW that you're in there because you need to get PAID! Like everyone in the world doesn't know that 99% of people get little or no actual satisfaction out of their jobs, they just have to earn a paycheck to live their friggin' LIVES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

But you have to play the game like some kind of robot. I hate it!!!

Anyway, you covered everything. You need to be confident but not cocky or arrogant, pleasant but not TOO much personality so they think you're a clown or something, positive, professional, and you have to answer all the baloney questions with the pure baloney answers they're looking for. It's the worst. Me personally, I'm the irreverent, witty, warm, friendly type -- totally doesn't play at interviews.

I feel ya bro. That's great in the office but how can you show that in a 30 minute interview? Yeah, walk into a job interview and try and be funny, witting, not take it serious and see if you'll get the job???? You have to act super serious and play their F-in games. So why do you want this geeky spreadsheet job? Because it's my calling, it's what I love to do. When I go home I might just make a spreadsheet about the things I did today?????

F this shit.

[xkgb]

start by jerking off and ask interviewer if this is something he/she enjoys

[jjgold]

Just be confident and you take over the interview

[FreeFall]

you tell them what they want to hear.

[C-Gold]

Saying you are looking for better money and room to grow is always okay to me in an interview. I always encourage my people to seek better opportunities, even if it is outside the company. Completely agree that the H.R. screeners are a waste of time and money. Have yet to find a candidate worth hiring that they have sent to me. I usually identify people within the company I want or people from the outside and bring them in for an interview. If it goes well, I call H.R, and tell them to expect an application from person x and to fast track it to my office as I plan on making them an offer.

The weakness question is stupid. When I was asked that at an interview, I said I tend to speak too freely. They asked me to expand on the answer and I replied something to the effect that they were all fuckking idiots. I actually got the job. lol

Worst interview question I've ever been asked: "If you were a car, what kind of car would you be?" I walked out.

Feel free to pm me if you need any tips and good luck.

Grits n Gravy

I appreciate your advice and I like your angle. You sound street smart. "Oh you're a hard worker, can you please give me 3 examples"? Sounds like you can sniff out some bullshit.

Sounds to me like you think like the owner should, would, or could. But what if you are just interviewing with somebody from the department you'd work for? These people aren't trained and don't know how to conduct interviews. I don't even think they really know the best questions to ask or what to look for. I think these department types just want to see if A) They like you B) You can do the job C) You aren't a complete moron.

If I was the owner of the company I'd also want to have the best employees working for me. However I know for a fact that some people do NOT hire the best person because they fear that person. If I hire this great guy JJGold and he's better than me, then in a few years he could take MY prescious job.

I like your advice but I'm not sure if I could follow it in practice. I think telling some people you want this job because " it pays better and allows me room to grow" is a deal breaker. What if you don't even know the pay? I'm always scared to talk pay because if I tell them I make X they will offer me X +1. If they THINK I make 3X then maybe they will give me 3X+1. I know these mofos will try and low ball you.

If I was interviewing with a straight shooter then I think I'd be more of a straight shooter. But when I'm interviewing with this short, fat, glasses, geeky white guy who has nothing in common with me what am I supposed to do?

[yurnero]

c gold, yet another post i must agree with you on. the good ole job interview and yes, it is EXACTLY like you said:

Balancing act between being humble and self promoting yourself.
Formal dress but not blowing them out of the water
Talking in business language but trying to act like you have a personality too
Telling them the same shat everybody else does, I'm a hard worker, a go getter blah blah blah

These shitty employers who think they can get a good read on people. Most everyone will "be" someone they are really not during the interview process. I am no different, have to go through the same BS to try to get hired. And ultimately, what is it all for? MORE MONEY of course, ******* everything in LIFE is about more money, but you cant just say that because it will make you look like a douche. There was this one time though when the manager asked me what makes/keeps me motivated and I told her money, she was suprised but maybe appreciated the honestly because I ended up getting the job anyways.

In a way, its like having to bet for the middle to win in terms of sports gambling

[Ninersnut]

Just went thru this. Killed the interview and the second one. I start in two weeks. Just told my current employer to go **** himself.

[PocketChange]

Mimic the interviewer. Use the same kind of language he uses. If he laughs a lot, laugh along with him.

[C-Gold]

c gold, yet another post i must agree with you on. the good ole job interview and yes, it is EXACTLY like you said:

Balancing act between being humble and self promoting yourself.
Formal dress but not blowing them out of the water
Talking in business language but trying to act like you have a personality too
Telling them the same shat everybody else does, I'm a hard worker, a go getter blah blah blah

These shitty employers who think they can get a good read on people. Most everyone will "be" someone they are really not during the interview process. I am no different, have to go through the same BS to try to get hired. And ultimately, what is it all for? MORE MONEY of course, ******* everything in LIFE is about more money, but you cant just say that because it will make you look like a douche. There was this one time though when the manager asked me what makes/keeps me motivated and I told her money, she was suprised but maybe appreciated the honestly because I ended up getting the job anyways.

In a way, its like having to bet for the middle to win in terms of sports gambling

It depends. If you interview with the Middle Manager Office space, fill up my coffee and gossip about the office type I think saying the word "money" is an automatic disqualification. Money is a dirty word to those types. They all want it, but pretend it doesn't exist.

BUT I also interviewed with a broker,
"Why are you here?
yeah but why are you here?
Yeah but why?
Why do you want it?"

MONEY! The broker had a twisted capitalistic smile like he just heard what he wanted. Those aggressive/realist types WANT to hear you say it. They want to see that you have balls. He asked me a real question and within bam bam bam answers he got to what he wanted to hear.

The fat, geeky middle manager types WANT to be lied to. They WANT to see you do the dance, and pretend like you WANT to do the job because you love love LOVE it.

Maybe thinking this out you have to quickly read the other players in the interview, determine how serious they are, how powerful they are, and IF THEY WANT TO BE LIED TO or not? Grits doesn't want to be lied to. The geeky guy in accounting wants you to play the game. I guess my own advice after self introspection is to KNOW THE PLAYERS.

[Brewers in 7]

I had a interview for a position in a company i worked in for 4 years, got a new suit, nice resume, figuring it'd be taken serious.. the lady doing the interview had no plans on seriously considering me for the position, asked me questions that no one would ask in a interview, hired a 300 lb woman who sits in her office does nada, and recently got pregnant, while i am still busting my ass 40+ a week for less than JJGOLD should get for each post he makes...

[shaggy3000]

im pretty cocky. and i show it in the interview. all of my jobs are for sales and management so every answer i give is about leading and customer service. luckily i can lie well and can half heartedly talk about whatever people might like to do. but i never talk money. i just say i dont know what this job pays to start but i know ill rise up through the company and everything will even out. all half lies half cocky. and now im always telling them i have a job but im looking for a career now.

i say this as im about to go on a panel interview for management at Kroger. ( really want this job )

[C-Gold]

Yeah, they asked me if I was going on any more interviews or were looking at other options. I named off some competitors. You have to let them know you are in demand.

[C-Gold]

I had a interview for a position in a company i worked in for 4 years, got a new suit, nice resume, figuring it'd be taken serious.. the lady doing the interview had no plans on seriously considering me for the position, asked me questions that no one would ask in a interview, hired a 300 lb woman who sits in her office does nada, and recently got pregnant, while i am still busting my ass 40+ a week for less than JJGOLD should get for each post he makes...

The company I work for is real down with Affirmative action. I've had it before in previous companies but nothing this blatant.

My friends in the other department (not mine) were looking for some support and had 2 candidates.

1) A young girl, fresh out of college, a very well respected college, maybe even grad school or was going to go to grad school part time. She was smart, good looking, witty, had career ambitions, was a self starter go getter, in an office full of guys. People had specifically been saying we need "more women" to balance things out. They said she would have been PERRRFECT for the job and it wasn't a very hard job anyway.

2) An old Black lady, worked odd jobs her whole life. Didn't even come from the same industry ( but the job was low level admin). Not particularly well spoken.

Want to guess who they hired? Want to guess who didn't even know how to send an email in Microsoft Outlook? Want to guess who was already complaining to ME about MY friend in the other department? She made a stupid mistake on something and he corrected her, and she was complaining to me.

So now this smart, good looking college girl gets rejected for a job she would have been perfect for, and this lady that doesn't even know how to send an email is hired. That's the kind of crap that pisses me off makes me feel so bad for the rejected person. Who knows if that college girl even found a job yet or could pay off her loans, meanwhile my company hired an idiot.

[Grits n' Gravy]

Grits n Gravy

I appreciate your advice and I like your angle. You sound street smart. "Oh you're a hard worker, can you please give me 3 examples"? Sounds like you can sniff out some bullshit.

Sounds to me like you think like the owner should, would, or could. But what if you are just interviewing with somebody from the department you'd work for? These people aren't trained and don't know how to conduct interviews. I don't even think they really know the best questions to ask or what to look for. I think these department types just want to see if A) They like you B) You can do the job C) You aren't a complete moron.

If I was the owner of the company I'd also want to have the best employees working for me. However I know for a fact that some people do NOT hire the best person because they fear that person. If I hire this great guy JJGold and he's better than me, then in a few years he could take MY prescious job.

I like your advice but I'm not sure if I could follow it in practice. I think telling some people you want this job because " it pays better and allows me room to grow" is a deal breaker. What if you don't even know the pay? I'm always scared to talk pay because if I tell them I make X they will offer me X +1. If they THINK I make 3X then maybe they will give me 3X+1. I know these mofos will try and low ball you.

If I was interviewing with a straight shooter then I think I'd be more of a straight shooter. But when I'm interviewing with this short, fat, glasses, geeky white guy who has nothing in common with me what am I supposed to do?

thanks for compliments. i get a lot of latitude with my job so hiring someone isn't that difficult. they trust me and my eye for talent(until i bring in a shitbird or two).

when interviewing with the person from the department you are applying for i find it is best to let them lay out how they do things. especially if you are in the same field but a different company. this way you can't put your foot in your mouth. if you made it to the department interview, you already have the experience and/or skills they are looking for. now it is just a matter of them figuring out whether or not you are a good fit.

i've always been very ambivalent about what the pay is for the job until they make an offer. then i'll negotiate. to me that is the best way to go, but the casino i work for now is known to pay higher than 95% of the rest of the industry so i pretty much know most people are coming in for more money and a shot to work for steve wynn. i put that on the table to job candidates up front so they don't bore me with boring answers.

a question h.r. at venetian wanted me to ask all managerial candidates was "has anyone ever questioned your honesty or integrity? and if so how did you react?" to me the only acceptable answer was "yes". everyone answered "no." me being an asshole would follow up with "so nobody ever called you a liar?" "you never broke something as a child and when your mom or dad busted you, you denied it?" both of my questions would be met with blank stares or a "no" response. then i'd say "well i call bullshit on you and think you are lying right now. hoe do you feel?" more blank stares. interview over. the best was one guy called me a racist. i laughed and said "fool, we are both black."

[hubie69]

I act like a fool with my pants on the ground

[C-Gold]

Grits, how hard is it to break into the casino business?