The CDC Prepares For The Zombie Apocalypse

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  • Roadtrip635
    SBR Hall of Famer
    • 12-07-10
    • 6129

    #1
    The CDC Prepares For The Zombie Apocalypse
    The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) has published a guide to prepare for the eventual Zombie Apocalypse.



    "The rise of zombies in pop culture has given credence to the idea that a zombie apocalypse could happen. In such a scenario zombies would take over entire countries, roaming city streets eating anything living that got in their way. The proliferation of this idea has led many people to wonder “How do I prepare for a zombie apocalypse?” Well, we’re here to answer that question for you....

    If zombies did start roaming the streets, CDC would conduct an investigation much like any other disease outbreak. CDC would provide technical assistance to cities, states, or international partners dealing with a zombie infestation. It’s likely that an investigation of this scenario would seek to accomplish several goals: determine the cause of the illness, the source of the infection/virus/toxin, learn how it is transmitted and how readily it is spread, how to break the cycle of transmission and thus prevent further cases, and how patients can best be treated. Not only would scientists be working to identify the cause and cure of the zombie outbreak, but CDC and other federal agencies would send medical teams and first responders to help those in affected areas (I will be volunteering the young nameless disease detectives for the field work)...."


    Information on how to stay safe during public health emergencies.
  • LiarGame
    SBR Wise Guy
    • 02-05-10
    • 565

    #2
    That is just too weird...
    Comment
    • flocko76
      SBR MVP
      • 10-01-10
      • 1447

      #3
      watch zombieland for pointers. rule 1 cardio. i for one am pushing for this.
      Comment
      • B1GER1C828
        SBR Posting Legend
        • 07-31-07
        • 10244

        #4
        i feel safer now Thank you CDC.
        Comment
        • mrmarket
          SBR MVP
          • 01-26-10
          • 4953

          #5
          This has to be a hoax or a publicity stunt. If it's not the most scary thing is these fukking retards are in charge of outbreaks of real diseases.

          Let's have a document for the coming jesus apocalypse. Better stock up on those fish, crosses and little alter boys to fukk like the rest of the priests who get into heaven preaching the word of god.
          Comment
          • Dad
            SBR Posting Legend
            • 11-26-08
            • 23245

            #6
            Can Zombies swim? I plan to spend apocalypse floating in pool.
            Comment
            • JW Cash
              SBR MVP
              • 12-31-08
              • 4453

              #7
              i love the zombies when they sing............................shes not there...............
              Comment
              • COYLO
                SBR MVP
                • 10-18-10
                • 2844

                #8
                Originally posted by Dad
                Can Zombies swim? I plan to spend apocalypse floating in pool.
                never thought of that one before, good call dad
                Comment
                • 757sFinest
                  SBR Wise Guy
                  • 09-23-10
                  • 885

                  #9
                  This is just crazy.
                  Comment
                  • Gonad
                    SBR MVP
                    • 08-17-10
                    • 1100

                    #10
                    The damn things learned how to swim in Land of the Dead...
                    Comment
                    • beefcake
                      SBR Posting Legend
                      • 11-26-09
                      • 14029

                      #11
                      I cant Fukking wait for World War Z...
                      Comment
                      • Recurring
                        SBR Sharp
                        • 12-11-10
                        • 343

                        #12
                        Really CDC?
                        Comment
                        • Full Time Hobo
                          SBR MVP
                          • 05-16-10
                          • 2778

                          #13

                          Funny read.They must be looking for some publicity. . . atleast I hope so... otherwise this is depressing.
                          But seriously who hasn't watched a movie or played some sort of video game having to do with the zombie apocalypse.
                          Comment
                          • xlilsp1keyx
                            SBR Wise Guy
                            • 11-03-10
                            • 557

                            #14
                            LOL they have zombie kits for sale too..... we can only imagine what the world would be like.. too many movies.
                            Comment
                            • Cuse0323
                              BARRELED IN @ SBR!
                              • 12-09-09
                              • 30169

                              #15
                              I wish a zombie apocalypse was possible
                              Comment
                              • Roadtrip635
                                SBR Hall of Famer
                                • 12-07-10
                                • 6129

                                #16
                                As long as it's the slow zombies, don't want to fukk with those rabid fast ones.
                                Comment
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