If the dealer who had seen your cards told you after the hole cards were dealt, "you have about a 20-23 percent chance of winning this hand if you make a call of the other player's all-in shove, do you want to call?", you'd say, "only a stupid mother fukker would make that call, I fold"....
If you went into a casino and they had a new table game where you only had a 20-23 percent chance of winning, and asked you to play, you'd say "I'm not a stupid mother fukker, I'll pass on that f'd up shit."
If at a live game of holdem a guy went waves/no1here on you and said "I have ace big suited and I'm all in", and you held only ace f'n rag, you'd say, "well, I'm no stupid mother fukker, so I'll fold"....
However, to win at sbr poker, you'd have to answer all the questions above in the opposite.... you have to go george f'n "opposite day" costanza and say fuk stats, fuk math, and fuk playing smart poker, "I'm calling," "I'm playing your mother f'n new table game", and "I call with my ace f'n rag, because I'm a stupid mother fukkin' mother fukker and I know I'm a roughly 80-20/76-24 dog, but sbr, being the rigged shithole that it is, will save my stupid mother fukkin' ass...."
and that's the mentality it takes to win hands here at sbr....
we've all joked about "SBR POKER -- Shithole Be Rigged" and "sbr poker -- get it in behind or get it in the behind" being the official slogan of the site, and as with most all such jokes, there is some truth in it....
for seven straight days of this latest promo, the "stupid mother fukker" mentality has put me on the rail.... I can't lose a f'n straight up kk v aa or ak v aq battle, it has to be some stupid mother fukkin' bad beat bullshit that only a rigged shithole on-line poker program can serve up night after night. In the real poker world, one not concerned with "spreading the wealth" and not letting truly random hands play out, this shit simply doesn't happen. As for the online poker world, the train of thought had to be "to make money, we have to have as many players as possible playing, signing in, depositing funds, etc.,, and if we don't rig the shit, the best players will win, the shitty players will quit, and our incomes will shrink, so we have to let the shitty players (the stupid mother fukkers) win some, and spread the wealth, to keep all players happy and depositing funds so we can rake the shit out of em"....
that was how most of the programming in online poker software was created, and obviously the shit sbr used to try to pimp out for $75,000.00 a hit (I'm not bullshitting you, that is the f'n truth) was created on that same platform, despite it not being actually used in such a manner..... nevertheless, it plays the same....
and that's why to play sbr poker successfully, you have to forget everything you know about playing poker in the real world, live, and how the mathematical stats that we all see on espn's covg of the wsop and the heartland poker tour generally are there for a reason, and usually hold up, and thus suspend reality, math, stats, etc., and say, "fuk it, I know I must be behind, but I'M A STUPID MOTHER FUKKER, so I'll call off 95 percent of my stack knowing I'm way behind, but I know sbr will deal my ace rag my rag, probably even two of them, on the flop, and save my stupid mother fukkin' ass and take out this other stupid mother fukker that's stupid enough to think his ace big or whatever roughly 80-20 favorite he's holding will actually hold up on this rigged shithole of a poker site. I know he's shown ace big or big pairs after making big moves, and we've now been playing for an hour and a half, and he's been conservative the whole time, and it's very unlikely at this point in the trny he'd put his trny life on the line with some stupid fukkin' bluff, but fuk it, I'm a stupid mother fukker and know sbr will save me!"
it's so hard to do: to forget everything you know about playing solid poker, to not lay down shit hands to big raises but to call instead when you're obviously way behind, and to generally stop trying to play smart poker on sbr but rather play like an idiot, but TRUST ME, after the 7-8 tourneys I've played in this promo, you have to play like a stupid mother fukker to win......
If you went into a casino and they had a new table game where you only had a 20-23 percent chance of winning, and asked you to play, you'd say "I'm not a stupid mother fukker, I'll pass on that f'd up shit."
If at a live game of holdem a guy went waves/no1here on you and said "I have ace big suited and I'm all in", and you held only ace f'n rag, you'd say, "well, I'm no stupid mother fukker, so I'll fold"....
However, to win at sbr poker, you'd have to answer all the questions above in the opposite.... you have to go george f'n "opposite day" costanza and say fuk stats, fuk math, and fuk playing smart poker, "I'm calling," "I'm playing your mother f'n new table game", and "I call with my ace f'n rag, because I'm a stupid mother fukkin' mother fukker and I know I'm a roughly 80-20/76-24 dog, but sbr, being the rigged shithole that it is, will save my stupid mother fukkin' ass...."
and that's the mentality it takes to win hands here at sbr....
we've all joked about "SBR POKER -- Shithole Be Rigged" and "sbr poker -- get it in behind or get it in the behind" being the official slogan of the site, and as with most all such jokes, there is some truth in it....
for seven straight days of this latest promo, the "stupid mother fukker" mentality has put me on the rail.... I can't lose a f'n straight up kk v aa or ak v aq battle, it has to be some stupid mother fukkin' bad beat bullshit that only a rigged shithole on-line poker program can serve up night after night. In the real poker world, one not concerned with "spreading the wealth" and not letting truly random hands play out, this shit simply doesn't happen. As for the online poker world, the train of thought had to be "to make money, we have to have as many players as possible playing, signing in, depositing funds, etc.,, and if we don't rig the shit, the best players will win, the shitty players will quit, and our incomes will shrink, so we have to let the shitty players (the stupid mother fukkers) win some, and spread the wealth, to keep all players happy and depositing funds so we can rake the shit out of em"....
that was how most of the programming in online poker software was created, and obviously the shit sbr used to try to pimp out for $75,000.00 a hit (I'm not bullshitting you, that is the f'n truth) was created on that same platform, despite it not being actually used in such a manner..... nevertheless, it plays the same....
and that's why to play sbr poker successfully, you have to forget everything you know about playing poker in the real world, live, and how the mathematical stats that we all see on espn's covg of the wsop and the heartland poker tour generally are there for a reason, and usually hold up, and thus suspend reality, math, stats, etc., and say, "fuk it, I know I must be behind, but I'M A STUPID MOTHER FUKKER, so I'll call off 95 percent of my stack knowing I'm way behind, but I know sbr will deal my ace rag my rag, probably even two of them, on the flop, and save my stupid mother fukkin' ass and take out this other stupid mother fukker that's stupid enough to think his ace big or whatever roughly 80-20 favorite he's holding will actually hold up on this rigged shithole of a poker site. I know he's shown ace big or big pairs after making big moves, and we've now been playing for an hour and a half, and he's been conservative the whole time, and it's very unlikely at this point in the trny he'd put his trny life on the line with some stupid fukkin' bluff, but fuk it, I'm a stupid mother fukker and know sbr will save me!"
it's so hard to do: to forget everything you know about playing solid poker, to not lay down shit hands to big raises but to call instead when you're obviously way behind, and to generally stop trying to play smart poker on sbr but rather play like an idiot, but TRUST ME, after the 7-8 tourneys I've played in this promo, you have to play like a stupid mother fukker to win......
