Massage parlors are closed within 150 miles of the stadium. In response to this, human traffickers are protesting outside the stadium. Everybody has tight hamstrings around here. Overnight the motels around the airport have turned into high rise condos. "Happy Ending" jokes are down 37% across the board. All eyes are on the chiropractors right now. Everybody knows they are potentially the most powerful people in the city now. Stay Purple!
