Originally posted on 04/18/2014:

he should have just said hi i'm canadian russian but horribly banged up looking and have no rubles cause i'm broke

i am not lacking in self confidence, software skills, or pimples

i'm hung like a T-rex but also ginger so there's no hiding the freckles most folks on the street point laugh at me

i wear a casio calculator watch, drive a bread truck and live in my mom's storage facility

i need attention so will make up stories about what kind of car i wish i had sometimes