1. 03-13-19 09:12 PM #1
    Seaweed
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    Joke of the day

    2 attennas meet on the other roof, fall in love, and decide to get married. The wedding wasn’t much, but the reception was great!
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  2. 03-13-19 09:19 PM #2
    johnnyvegas13
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    Why do Swedish subs use sonar ???

    So they can scan da navy in ...
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  3. 03-13-19 09:25 PM #3
    JIBBBY
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    Did you hear about the mathematician that was afraid of negative numbers? He'll stop at nothing to avoid them...
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  4. 03-13-19 09:29 PM #4
    Cuse0323
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    Why don’t they play poker in the jungle?

    Too many Cheetahs!
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  5. 03-13-19 09:30 PM #5
    VeggieDog
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    A three legged dog hopped into a bar and said, "I'm looking for the man that shot my paw!".
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  6. 03-13-19 09:33 PM #6
    JIBBBY
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    ......
    Last edited by JIBBBY; 03-13-19 at 09:57 PM.
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  7. 03-13-19 10:13 PM #7
    pilebuck13
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    LMao
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  8. 03-13-19 10:14 PM #8
    jjgold
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    Seaweed your not funny

    I am a Moderator and can ban you for that
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  9. 03-13-19 10:18 PM #9
    KiDBaZkiT
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    Joke of the day is seaweed not posting an auto fade for the day.
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  10. 03-13-19 11:28 PM #10
    pilebuck13
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    What did the Buffalo say to his little boy when he dropped him off at school? Bison
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  11. 03-14-19 12:26 AM #11
    Seaweed
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    Why cant 2 asians have a white kid?
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  12. 03-14-19 12:34 AM #12
    Booya711
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    Two guys walk into a bar...one guy looks at the other one and says “damn...you didn’t see it either?”
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  13. 03-14-19 12:37 AM #13
    PromiseLand
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    What did one lesbo vampire say to the other lesbo vampire?

    I'll see you next month.
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  14. 03-14-19 12:42 AM #14
    DiggityDaggityDo
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    Quote Originally Posted by JIBBBY View Post
    ......
    This is the best one yet!
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  15. 03-14-19 12:55 PM #15
    Auto Donk
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    this is the one joke I always tell the babes at a swinger party, after throwin' em some dik and we're just chillin:

    after some ho tells some lame seeweed like joke, I chime in with:

    "I got one for ya, Up in heaven, God was having some problems finishing off a new wing for newly-arriving souls, so he summoned St. Peter, and instructed him to screen new arrivals a little more closely, and hold a larger percentage over in Purgatory until they could get the logistics worked out and finish off the new wing.

    with that edict in mind, St. Peter made it back down to the pearly gates, and about that time [here I make a noise of a new soul arriving that makes em laff already] a soul arrives, and St.. Peter says "tell me about your day".....

    the soul says, "well, I was convinced my wife was cheating on me, so I came home early for lunch to see if I could catch her, and sure enough, there she is, wearing lingerie and looking like she'd been fukkin' some guy. I search our condo -- we live on the 6th floor of a hi-rise, and can't find him inside, so i run out on the balcony, and sure enough, this guy apparently had climbed over the rail and was now hanging onto the concrete, about to try and drop down to the next floor or something, so I grab an empty flower pot, and start smashing his hands with it, trying to make him let go and fall.... well, he falls, but the son of bitch lands in the bushes on his back and doesn't die. so I run inside, into the kitchen, looking for something big enough to throw over the balcony to kill him, and start moving the refrigerator towards the door, back and forth, wedge it out onto the patio, grab the bottom, and heave the damn heavy thing over the fukkin' rail so that it will land on him, and die of a heart attack, so here I am.....

    St Peter says, "Oh my, come on in".....

    about that time, another soul {make sound again} comes soaring up, and st Peter says "tell me about your day"....

    the second soul says, "well, I do maintenance work, and I was working on the outside of a hi-rise on the 7th floor, when I slipped and fell to the sixth floor. I was hangin' on for dear life, when some psycho comes running out of his condo and accuses me of fukkin' his wife, and starts beating man hands with an empty flower pot. I finally can't hold on any longer, and fall six stories, sure I'm gonna die when I hit the bottom. Miraculously, I survive the fall, landing in the bushes, and about the time I'm gonna move, I look up, and here comes a refrigerator from directly above, which hits me and here I am."

    st Peter says, "OH MY, you can definitely come in".....

    about that time, another soul comes soaring up {make soul soaring sound again}, and st Peter says "tell me about your day".....

    and the third soul responds, "WELL, imagine yourself sitting naked in a refrigerator........"
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  16. 03-18-19 08:57 PM #16
    Al Masters
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    Jokes are just that.. not to be taken to
    seriously..if anyone is offended by the
    following one.. so sorry..

    The names have been changed for the
    purpose of this community.



    Whats the difference between posters lakerboy
    and wikkidinsane?














    About 15 minutes in the oven.
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  17. 03-21-19 08:19 PM #17
    b1slickguy
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    What do cops and a Slinky have in common?

    Neither are actually good for anything, but it puts a smile on your face when you see one tumbling down a set of stairs.
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  18. 03-21-19 11:34 PM #18
    bozeman
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    If you take your coffee decaf, and if you just started to vape instead of smoking cigarettes, - watch out - you are on your way to a rubber woman!
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  19. 03-22-19 08:04 AM #19
    PittsburghPlayer
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    Three pals were talking about women and sex while sitting at the bar ...

    one friend asks, "what is the worst thing about eating bald pussy"?
    and before any of them could even give thought, a guy with a t-shirt and the name Steve on the back called out

    "putting the diaper back on"
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  20. 03-22-19 08:22 AM #20
    MaltedHopsFrenzy
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    What do you get when you mix a pirate with a pedophile?


    "AARRRR Kelly"
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  21. 03-22-19 11:33 AM #21
    Hman
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    Guys you can bicker back and forth all you want here in The Saloon.

    But this is the very last warning about the pedophile name calling, or even insinuating it.

    It's too over the top.

    Thanks for understanding
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  22. 03-22-19 05:00 PM #22
    Big Bear
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    Quote Originally Posted by Seaweed View Post
    2 attennas meet on the other roof, fall in love, and decide to get married. The wedding wasn’t much, but the reception was great!
    Hahahahahahahaha
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  23. 03-22-19 05:21 PM #23
    leetreaper
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    How about a bet of the day? WTF are you doing on this forum? Jerking off to antenna jokes??? Freaking idiot
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  24. 03-23-19 12:34 AM #24
    Big Bear
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    Quote Originally Posted by leetreaper View Post
    How about a bet of the day? WTF are you doing on this forum? Jerking off to antenna jokes??? Freaking idiot
    Chillax bro

    This is the SALOON

    If you want sports talk go to Players Talk nahmean
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  25. 04-24-19 09:18 AM #25
    b1slickguy
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    Bill Clinton went back to Arkansas for the weekend a while back. When he arrived back home he walked up to the door of his home with 2 razorbacks. One tucked under each arm. The maid greeted him and asked, “What are those?” He answers, “These are razorbacks. I got one for Hillary and one for Chelsea.” The maid smiles at him and says, “Good trade.”
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  26. 04-24-19 01:03 PM #26
    sourtwist
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    Quote Originally Posted by PromiseLand View Post
    What did one lesbo vampire say to the other lesbo vampire?

    I'll see you next month.
    Nope
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  27. 04-24-19 03:22 PM #27
    Chi_archie
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    keep em coming
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  28. 04-24-19 06:10 PM #28
    inmyownzone
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    what do you call a nose with no body?



    nobody nose
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  29. 05-23-19 05:03 PM #29
    b1slickguy
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    How do you keep the New York Jets out of your front lawn?

    Paint a goal line on the sidewalk.
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  30. 05-24-19 02:18 AM #30
    Baraldsson
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    Joke of the week?

    Bran Stark on the Iron Throne.
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  31. 05-24-19 06:47 AM #31
    Foxx
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    Quote Originally Posted by Baraldsson View Post
    Joke of the week?Bran Stark on the Iron Throne.
    Spoiler, damn. Wtf
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  32. 05-24-19 07:31 AM #32
    53 defense
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    now THAT is funny.....
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  33. 05-24-19 11:40 AM #33
    KVB
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  34. 05-24-19 11:57 AM #34
    DwightShrute
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    Quote Originally Posted by Seaweed View Post
    2 attennas meet on the other roof, fall in love, and decide to get married. The wedding wasn’t much, but the reception was great!
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  35. 05-24-19 12:24 PM #35
    juicername
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    Quote Originally Posted by Seaweed View Post
    2 attennas meet on the other roof, fall in love, and decide to get married. The wedding wasn’t much, but the reception was great!
    Antennas. Also, two antennas wouldn't necessarily mean better reception.
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