1. 12-17-17 10:16 PM #36
    RudyRuetigger
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    guy has 1 or 2 years MAX left

    that is why i am not mean

    i have a heart and holiday season
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  2. 12-17-17 10:18 PM #37
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    Quote Originally Posted by eidolon View Post
    Time to go see the doctor mate





    what was it buzz lightyear said about andy's older brother....?

    something like, "I don't think those whores ever went to medical school...."

    great, that last image and the electrical current apparently re-activated the last of the viagra black gold I took this morning..... now I'm sittin here watchin the cowboys game trying to hide this veiny shit from the wife, or get accused of watchin porn over here.....

    can this shit get any worse?
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  3. 12-17-17 11:00 PM #38
    Fire in da hole
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    Might be those STDs coming back lol
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  4. 12-17-17 11:02 PM #39
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    Quote Originally Posted by Fire in da hole View Post
    Might be those STDs coming back lol
    i didn't stuff my hole fukkin' leg in any babe's hole(s)....
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  5. 12-17-17 11:14 PM #40
    Shute
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    Syphillis
    The great imitator
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  6. 12-17-17 11:44 PM #41
    Fire in da hole
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    Quote Originally Posted by Auto Donk View Post
    i didn't stuff my hole fukkin' leg in any babe's hole(s)....
    Bwahahaha. That must be one of those other stories lol
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  7. 12-18-17 09:32 AM #42
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    Quote Originally Posted by Fire in da hole View Post
    Bwahahaha. That must be one of those other stories lol
    if my forearm comes down with The Herpes, well, I will know how that happened.....

    as this photo of jj gold illustrates:




    as for the electrical current, so far this a.m. it is nowhere to be felt.....

    guess it was a result of all the bone-jarring "schwappin'" that took place saturday night/early sunday morning.....

    hopin' I dodged a bullet, as rudy is probably right about my time left here on this planet....
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  8. 12-18-17 09:37 AM #43
    Optional
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    Shooting down the legs like that is usually "referred" back pain.

    I believe it happens as the brain has trouble locating exactly where the pain is internally and does this like an alarm.
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  9. 12-18-17 09:42 AM #44
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    Quote Originally Posted by Optional View Post
    Shooting down the legs like that is usually "referred" back pain.

    I believe it happens as the brain has trouble locating exactly where the pain is internally and does this like an alarm.
    ah, this makes sense.... probably searching for my left ball, which is still hiding after some babe put the "death clinch" on my sack during the "reach back and grab some sack" portion of the evening......

    once he pops back out of seclusion, the pain will probably nestle in there, where it's supposed to be......
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  10. 12-18-17 10:20 AM #45
    Thor4140
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    Quote Originally Posted by Auto Donk View Post
    shit, now i'm sittin her jerkin off with the wrong hand, copper wire tied around my neck and running out the window to the lightning rod, in cold weather (for us texans, anyway), freezing my ass off watching yoga videos on youtube and a delayed cowboys game (i'm still early third quarter).....

    thanks, gentlemen!

    I feel a little better, and it stops if i stomp on my left foot with my right.....
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  11. 12-18-17 10:23 AM #46
    jjgold
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    Just a nerve ending

    Relax and stop living in fear

    Just like with me why do you fear me??
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  12. 12-18-17 10:39 AM #47
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    Quote Originally Posted by jjgold View Post
    J
    Relax and stop living in fear

    Just like with me why do you fear me??
    probably because you remind me of a possum.... snaggly, snarly teeth, hissing, mangy lookin'....

    i found one of your ilk in my trashcan last week, he'd fallen in while huntin' for goodies, and was hissing and shit.... as the trash was coming later, I just left him in there (after throwing an empty large cardboard box on top of him), and hauled him down to the street.

    should've been filming when the trash guys came by 30 minutes later, as both those black dudes about shit their pants when one emptied that can and that wild jj gold-like varmint apparently went wild in the back of their f'n truck.....

    both of them jumped back about five feet, and one immediately hit the compactor..... don't know if the possum was able to bail out before being crushed to death, but it was some funny shit, either way.....

    and gives me the idea of tossin your mangy into the back of a trash compactor, as well, Goldy......

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  13. 12-18-17 10:43 AM #48
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    definitely a strong resemblance here:

    both angry, hissing, bad teeth, mangy, losing hair, sad, pathetic, disease-carrying, act tougher than they really are, (I could go on and on, but fuk it).....





    Last edited by Auto Donk; 12-18-17 at 10:47 AM.
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  14. 12-18-17 11:03 AM #49
    klemopixx
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    Sounds like Sciatic nerve issues to me. Usually if you sleep in a weird position or on an uneven surface it can cause leg pain. I had a bulging disc in my lower back and it was like lightning shooting down my leg if I turned my back in the wrong position. Should probably get an MRI of the lower spine.

    Hope you feel better Donk.
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  15. 12-18-17 11:12 AM #50
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    thx, klemo....

    definitely feeling better, not that the electrical charge shit felt that bad... was more annoying than anything.....

    after deprogramming myself from reaching for a non-existent cell phone in my left f'n pocket (i did so the first twenty-thirty times i felt it, on some sort of sick pavlovian dog instinct), I barely noticed it.....

    it hasn't shown back up this morning.....

    and, to make a comment on rudy and jmobile's statements about my elderly status, I can't really argue that I'm not since i'm yappin' about goddam health problems on an internet chatboard..... on a f'n gambling site, no less.....

    truly messed up.....

    some, I think we know who, will call it "pathetic".....

    again, hard to disagree.....
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  16. 12-18-17 11:23 AM #51
    jjgold
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    What the hell was I saying in that tirade?
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  17. 12-18-17 11:29 AM #52
    hawkeye 16
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    If it's not painful it might be this:
    https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Varicocele

    https://www.steadyhealth.com/topics/...le-vein?page=5

    I had it all last week (I think). It's like you can feel your pulse in your balls. I was kind of freaking out. I didn't even know how to Google it. Luckily it went away. If it's painful, get it checked out, it could be something more.
    Last edited by hawkeye 16; 12-18-17 at 11:33 AM.
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  18. 12-18-17 11:47 AM #53
    Optional
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    Quote Originally Posted by hawkeye 16 View Post
    If it's not painful it might be this:
    https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Varicocele

    https://www.steadyhealth.com/topics/...le-vein?page=5

    I had it all last week (I think). It's like you can feel your pulse in your balls. I was kind of freaking out. I didn't even know how to Google it. Luckily it went away. If it's painful, get it checked out, it could be something more.
    That's like a hernia but where the gut lining breaks and intestinal sort of stuff falls down in your ball sack.

    I can tell you from personal experience that is causes real pain, not electrical shocks ;-)

    And if you really have it, don't wait, as the extra heat on your ball can kill it if left too long.
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  19. 12-18-17 01:50 PM #54
    hawkeye 16
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    Thanks Opti. It's good now, but I'll get it checked out if it comes back. I swear talking to doctors though, sometimes is like talking to a tree.
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  20. 12-18-17 02:02 PM #55
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    Possum boy!!!!!!!!!!!!
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  21. 12-18-17 02:05 PM #56
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    what were you saying????

    read your own lips:



    "DIGGITY DAGGITY DOOO!!!"

    "DiGGITY DAGGITY DOOO!!!"

    PossumBoy, I'm getting worried about your memory.... you may have the onset of, or even full-blown, alzheimer's..... a few days ago you couldn't even remember what you ate five mins before making a video....

    start takin' that jelly fish formulated memory preserving shit......
    Last edited by Auto Donk; 12-18-17 at 02:23 PM.
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  22. 12-18-17 02:08 PM #57
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    Quote Originally Posted by Optional View Post
    That's like a hernia but where the gut lining breaks and intestinal sort of stuff falls down in your ball sack.

    I can tell you from personal experience that is causes real pain, not electrical shocks ;-)

    And if you really have it, don't wait, as the extra heat on your ball can kill it if left too long.
    sounds like a condition that you might want to leave alone.....

    impress the shit out of the ladies with your huge nuts....
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  23. 12-18-17 02:28 PM #58
    Optional
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    Quote Originally Posted by hawkeye 16 View Post
    Thanks Opti. It's good now, but I'll get it checked out if it comes back. I swear talking to doctors though, sometimes is like talking to a tree.
    Agree. And hate going anyway.

    I've been seeing a traditional Chinese doctor for a skin condition 3 GPs just shrugged about over years. Drank four days worth of foul tasting herbal muddy water and low and behold it's started to clear up already.

    Quote Originally Posted by Auto Donk View Post

    sounds like a condition that you might want to leave alone.....

    impress the shit out of the ladies with your huge nuts....
    If ladies get impressed by a bag of worms!

    Thats what it feels like.
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  24. 12-18-17 03:01 PM #59
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    i had to have two inguinal hernia surgeries.... where both of my oversized balls dropped when i was a kid..... the path they travel leaves a possible hernia location due to the natural weakness/muscle structure....

    ripped the first side while skull-f'n a babe, felt it rip but kept goin' till i busted that nut.... then fell over in pain.... got tired of pushing my intestines back in for the next year, and finally had it sewed up.....

    the other side gave way about a year later under similar circumstances, had it sewed up about two months after the incident that ripped it wide open....
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  25. 12-18-17 03:14 PM #60
    PittsburghPlayer
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    dude, I am you
    but more fukked up
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  26. 12-18-17 03:37 PM #61
    BigOrange
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    Quit riding your wife's Sybian Donk or at least turn the power off!
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  27. 12-18-17 03:46 PM #62
    dante1
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    Quote Originally Posted by Auto Donk View Post
    definitely a strong resemblance here:

    both angry, hissing, bad teeth, mangy, losing hair, sad, pathetic, disease-carrying, act tougher than they really are, (I could go on and on, but fuk it).....








    lol, AD you are one funny guy.
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  28. 12-18-17 05:42 PM #63
    bobbywaves
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    On the bright side, it's good Donkey is getting familiar with electrical currents now.

    So it won't be a total shock, when I taser you jackass.
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  29. 12-18-17 05:59 PM #64
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    Quote Originally Posted by bobbywaves View Post
    On the bright side, it's good Donkey is getting familiar with electrical currents now.

    So it won't be a total shock, when I taser you jackass.
    fuk you waves, but on the bright side, i see you're makikn' money with your billboard side job again this christmas.....




    maybe this year you can afford a f'n star for your tree with the side cash.....


    '

    and maybe even a gift or two, you fukkin deadbeat stiffing scamming loser.....
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  30. 12-18-17 06:16 PM #65
    rkelly110
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    Fight current with current. Put your tongue on a 9 volt battery.

    Or do like I did. Grab a powered 220 volt fuse I thought wasn't. THAT will wake you up!
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  31. 12-19-17 03:55 AM #66
    TheGoldenGoose
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    In all seriousness, numbing and tingling in the legs and feet could be a warning sign of diabetes. I experience this in my feet and it feels like "pins and needles" on the bottom of my feet. A simple blood test determined that I have type two diabetes. Very strongly suggest you get a blood test immediately to determine blood sugar level. Type two diabetes can be controlled with medication. Left untreated full blown diabetes can result in limb amputation. No, this is not a joke. Get yourself tested immediately.
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  32. 12-19-17 07:35 AM #67
    firstclass
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    Simple solution Donker ICE THE BALLS FOR 10 MINUTES
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  33. 12-19-17 07:48 AM #68
    JAKEPEAVY21
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    Quote Originally Posted by Optional View Post
    Agree. And hate going anyway.

    I've been seeing a traditional Chinese doctor for a skin condition 3 GPs just shrugged about over years. Drank four days worth of foul tasting herbal muddy water and low and behold it's started to clear up already.



    If ladies get impressed by a bag of worms!

    Thats what it feels like.
    I remember suggesting that awhile back, glad you finally went and things are clearing up!
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  34. 12-19-17 07:49 AM #69
    JAKEPEAVY21
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    get tested if it continues donk
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  35. 12-19-17 08:00 AM #70
    Auto Donk
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    thanks for all the info and advice...., have a general appointment set for the week after xmas.....

    the current is barely enough to run a night light at this point....
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