[PhillyFlyers]

Go to meet this chick for lunch.

Show up at the spot but can't find parking.

Looking around I see a pay-for-park lot.

Pull in. Go to the ticket dispenser to get ticket.

Put my phone on top of ticket machine while I get some money out.

Put money in. Grab ticket.

Walk back to car to put ticket on dashboard.

Walk to lunch spot to meet chick.

Get there. Sit down.

Chick: "Hi! How are you?! Finally, we get to see each other without a thousand people around."

Me: "Yeah. It always seems like something gets in our way don't it?

Chick: "I know, right? We always have so many friends around."

Me: "penetrate! WHAT THE penetrate!?

Chick: "WHAT THE MATTER?!"

Me: "I forgot my phone! Stay here, I'll be right back."

At that point, I get up from the table and run back towards the parking lot to get my phone.

It's gone.

MOTHERFUKKER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!

Boys, you could have heard me scream motherfukker 5 miles away.

At this point, I'm feeling like I'm gonna kill someone.

Just then, I hear a horn honking.

I turn around.

Some n!gger in a truck honking at me, waving me down.

I'm like who the fukk is this?

Dude rolls up to me, and I'm ready stomp the life out of him if he tries some shit.

Looks at me and says "Excuse me but did you lose this"? and he shows me my phone.

Me: "Yes! Thank you so much!"

Spook: "Aww it's no problem. I saw it up there on the machine and I figured whoever lost it would come back looking for it"

Me: "I can't believe it. Listen, at the very least I owe you lunch. Why don't you come have lunch with us?"

Spook: "Naw I have to be on my way thanks anyway."

Me: "Seriously? I mean I can't believe this happened. I feel like I owe you. You totally changed my perception."

Spook: "I changed your perception? How?"

Me: "I mean it's not every day a fukkin spook returns stolen property is it? Especially in this city."

I wasn't trying to insult the guy it's just the way I talk but of course, he doesn't know this. At that point he got a shocked look on his face and drove away.

So, I'm walking back to the lunch spot, back to the chick waiting for me.

Chick: "Is everything ok? Did you find it?"

I hold up the phone and show it to her.

Chick: "How did you find it?"

Me: "You'll never believe it. Some fukkin n!gger picked it up and then waited for the owner to come back for it."

At thsi point, she gets a shocked look on her face. So I'm like what?

She says did you just say n!gger?

I'm say yeah, why?

She goes are you racist?

I say not at all. She says then why did you say that?

Me: "say what?"

chick: "the n word"

me: "you're not down with the brown are you?"

chick: "down with the brown?"

me: "yeah. are you?"

chick: "i'm not sure what that means"

me: "you know what it means. do you like n!ggers"

chick: "OMG! you're disgusting!"

me: "so you are down with the brown?"

chick: "I can't believe this. I can't believe you're saying this out in public acting like this."

me: "Acting like what? I don't know you very well, we only met a couple of times before this and I need to know certain things before we go any further so it's not a problem later on."

chick: "and one of those things is am I down with the brown?"

me: "Yes! Very important. I need to know if you ever slept with, gave oral, or even kissed a spook."

At this point she's like oh my fukkin god I really can't believe this. So, I just told her listen you're not looking very comfortable and I'll take that as a sign that's all I need to know.

At that point I got up and left and neither one of us ate a thing at that point. So I left her there and went to lunch, drank bourbon and smoked cigars later on then headed out to watch the fight.

And that's how my day ended.

Pretty crazy huh?

[cecil127]

And u call ME a bullshitter???
There was no chick and certainly none of that spook talk right in someones face...hell u wont even show up to say the childish shit u say here to my face sissy boy....good story bro...lol

[muldoon]

Go to meet this chick for lunch.

Show up at the spot but can't find parking.

Looking around I see a pay-for-park lot.

Pull in. Go to the ticket dispenser to get ticket.

Put my phone on top of ticket machine while I get some money out.

Put money in. Grab ticket.

Walk back to car to put ticket on dashboard.

Walk to lunch spot to meet chick.

Get there. Sit down.

Chick: "Hi! How are you?! Finally, we get to see each other without a thousand people around."

Me: "Yeah. It always seems like something gets in our way don't it?

Chick: "I know, right? We always have so many friends around."

Me: "penetrate! WHAT THE penetrate!?

Chick: "WHAT THE MATTER?!"

Me: "I forgot my phone! Stay here, I'll be right back."

At that point, I get up from the table and run back towards the parking lot to get my phone.

It's gone.

MOTHERFUKKER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!

Boys, you could have heard me scream motherfukker 5 miles away.

At this point, I'm feeling like I'm gonna kill someone.

Just then, I hear a horn honking.

I turn around.

Some n!gger in a truck honking at me, waving me down.

I'm like who the fukk is this?

Dude rolls up to me, and I'm ready stomp the life out of him if he tries some shit.

Looks at me and says "Excuse me but did you lose this"? and he shows me my phone.

Me: "Yes! Thank you so much!"

Spook: "Aww it's no problem. I saw it up there on the machine and I figured whoever lost it would come back looking for it"

Me: "I can't believe it. Listen, at the very least I owe you lunch. Why don't you come have lunch with us?"

Spook: "Naw I have to be on my way thanks anyway."

Me: "Seriously? I mean I can't believe this happened. I feel like I owe you. You totally changed my perception."

Spook: "I changed your perception? How?"

Me: "I mean it's not every day a fukkin spook returns stolen property is it? Especially in this city."

I wasn't trying to insult the guy it's just the way I talk but of course, he doesn't know this. At that point he got a shocked look on his face and drove away.

So, I'm walking back to the lunch spot, back to the chick waiting for me.

Chick: "Is everything ok? Did you find it?"

I hold up the phone and show it to her.

Chick: "How did you find it?"

Me: "You'll never believe it. Some fukkin n!gger picked it up and then waited for the owner to come back for it."

At thsi point, she gets a shocked look on her face. So I'm like what?

She says did you just say n!gger?

I'm say yeah, why?

She goes are you racist?

I say not at all. She says then why did you say that?

Me: "say what?"

chick: "the n word"

me: "you're not down with the brown are you?"

chick: "down with the brown?"

me: "yeah. are you?"

chick: "i'm not sure what that means"

me: "you know what it means. do you like n!ggers"

chick: "OMG! you're disgusting!"

me: "so you are down with the brown?"

chick: "I can't believe this. I can't believe you're saying this out in public acting like this."

me: "Acting like what? I don't know you very well, we only met a couple of times before this and I need to know certain things before we go any further so it's not a problem later on."

chick: "and one of those things is am I down with the brown?"

me: "Yes! Very important. I need to know if you ever slept with, gave oral, or even kissed a spook."

At this point she's like oh my fukkin god I really can't believe this. So, I just told her listen you're not looking very comfortable and I'll take that as a sign that's all I need to know.

At that point I got up and left and neither one of us ate a thing at that point. So I left her there and went to lunch, drank bourbon and smoked cigars later on then headed out to watch the fight.

And that's how my day ended.


So yesterday I got banged by a black dude
Pretty crazy huh?

Fixed it for ya

[PhillyFlyers]

And u call ME a bullshitter???
There was no chick and certainly none of that spook talk right in someones face...hell u wont even show up to say the childish shit u say here to my face sissy boy....good story bro...lol

Bullshitter.

[PhillyFlyers]

Fixed it for ya

Muldoon I would take a shit on you.

Scary thing is, you would probably like it.

[YourAllAmerican]

Story was too long to read, so I only skimmed. Here's what I took from it: The OP walks around holding his phone in hand, like a woman.

[cecil127]

Bullshitter.

nice try though...please don't cry about it. lol....like we believe a thing you phukking say...roflmao!

[innovation]

U left out the 45 minute part where u sukked Cawk to get your phone back.....

[SteveRyan]

[importmoon]

45 min he will get a summon cuz the meter expire.. btw did he swallow I wanna see the line on sbr forum...

[PhillyFlyers]

Listen, I don't give a fukk if any of you believe me or not.

It happened EXACTLY like I wrote it.

You dikkheads believing it or not isn't going to change the fact it happened.

[chopperocker]

this guys staring at four walls, interacting with imaginary people.

[ttwarrior1]

flyers is an animal

[SamDiamond]

Philly playing pretend again.

That's cute.

In a "Holy Fuk is this guy retarded" way.

[Ghenghis Kahn]

Go to meet this chick for lunch.

stopped reading after this.

who are you trying to kid pal?

[TPowell]

no way the black guy returns the phone. Bad story pal

[SteveRyan]

drank bourbon and smoked cigars

And that's how my day ended.

Fixed

[itchypickle]

I cant be the only one that remembered this song when he asked her if she ever kissed, sucked, slept with an 'n' word

[TheRifleman]

the only thing I find hard to believe is that the Ni999er returned the phone....it's just not in their DNA to do something like that. Other than that....great story!!

[TheRifleman]

I cant be the only one that remembered this song when he asked her if she ever kissed, sucked, slept with an 'n' word

I'm putting that in my MP3 for the gym....

[TheRifleman]

A black plague is descending upon civilization. That plague is called the ni999er.

[TheRifleman]

[itchypickle]

I'm putting that in my MP3 for the gym....

the man is a lyrical genius of his day

[BennyBigNuts]

Who is this phony? Weeder's brother?

[The Samurai]

U left out the 45 minute part where u sukked Cawk to get your phone back.....

Highlight of the thread^^^

[horja1]

Go to meet this chick for lunch.

Show up at the spot but can't find parking.

Looking around I see a pay-for-park lot.

Pull in. Go to the ticket dispenser to get ticket.

Put my phone on top of ticket machine while I get some money out.

Put money in. Grab ticket.

Walk back to car to put ticket on dashboard.

Walk to lunch spot to meet chick.

Get there. Sit down.

Chick: "Hi! How are you?! Finally, we get to see each other without a thousand people around."

Me: "Yeah. It always seems like something gets in our way don't it?

Chick: "I know, right? We always have so many friends around."

Me: "penetrate! WHAT THE penetrate!?

Chick: "WHAT THE MATTER?!"

Me: "I forgot my phone! Stay here, I'll be right back."

At that point, I get up from the table and run back towards the parking lot to get my phone.

It's gone.

MOTHERFUKKER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!

Boys, you could have heard me scream motherfukker 5 miles away.

At this point, I'm feeling like I'm gonna kill someone.

Just then, I hear a horn honking.

I turn around.

Some n!gger in a truck honking at me, waving me down.

I'm like who the fukk is this?

Dude rolls up to me, and I'm ready stomp the life out of him if he tries some shit.

Looks at me and says "Excuse me but did you lose this"? and he shows me my phone.

Me: "Yes! Thank you so much!"

Spook: "Aww it's no problem. I saw it up there on the machine and I figured whoever lost it would come back looking for it"

Me: "I can't believe it. Listen, at the very least I owe you lunch. Why don't you come have lunch with us?"

Spook: "Naw I have to be on my way thanks anyway."

Me: "Seriously? I mean I can't believe this happened. I feel like I owe you. You totally changed my perception."

Spook: "I changed your perception? How?"

Me: "I mean it's not every day a fukkin spook returns stolen property is it? Especially in this city."

I wasn't trying to insult the guy it's just the way I talk but of course, he doesn't know this. At that point he got a shocked look on his face and drove away.

So, I'm walking back to the lunch spot, back to the chick waiting for me.

Chick: "Is everything ok? Did you find it?"

I hold up the phone and show it to her.

Chick: "How did you find it?"

Me: "You'll never believe it. Some fukkin n!gger picked it up and then waited for the owner to come back for it."

At thsi point, she gets a shocked look on her face. So I'm like what?

She says did you just say n!gger?

I'm say yeah, why?

She goes are you racist?

I say not at all. She says then why did you say that?

Me: "say what?"

chick: "the n word"

me: "you're not down with the brown are you?"

chick: "down with the brown?"

me: "yeah. are you?"

chick: "i'm not sure what that means"

me: "you know what it means. do you like n!ggers"

chick: "OMG! you're disgusting!"

me: "so you are down with the brown?"

chick: "I can't believe this. I can't believe you're saying this out in public acting like this."

me: "Acting like what? I don't know you very well, we only met a couple of times before this and I need to know certain things before we go any further so it's not a problem later on."

chick: "and one of those things is am I down with the brown?"

me: "Yes! Very important. I need to know if you ever slept with, gave oral, or even kissed a spook."

At this point she's like oh my fukkin god I really can't believe this. So, I just told her listen you're not looking very comfortable and I'll take that as a sign that's all I need to know.

At that point I got up and left and neither one of us ate a thing at that point. So I left her there and went to lunch, drank bourbon and smoked cigars later on then headed out to watch the fight.

And that's how my day ended.

Pretty crazy huh?

are you a cartoon character?

[horja1]

the only thing I find hard to believe is that the Ni999er returned the phone....it's just not in their DNA to do something like that. Other than that....great story!!

what an idiot

[robzilla]

I don't believe any of that story. However, I think it's important to ask a girl that u are considering dating if they are attracted to guys that are another race. When I was dating, I had my own personal E harmony type list... but it was questions e harmony would never ask. There are about 100 must ask questions.

[ADR51]

The point is nobody gives a FUKK about what happened to you, so go suck a big black rooster!

[Tmuston Beltics]

When you asked a stranger to come and have a dinner with you and your date... That part was weird men

[SamDiamond]

When you asked a stranger to come and have a dinner with you and your date... That part was weird men

[thunderous]

When you asked a stranger to come and have a dinner with you and your date... That part was weird men

Maybe he got the idea of doing a threesome with the black guy

[rkelly110]

Only had 3 things taken from me. Of the 3, two were white kids.

Having the phone returned might've come about with karma. Philly might've done a good deed for someone
and karma returned the favor.

Judge per person instead of lumping and you will see a big difference in your thinking.

[DiggityDaggityDo]

Lets get a picture of the girl.

[FrozenMAN]

that's fuckin funny...+1 lol